Home Creators Posts Import Register Favorites Logout

Content

HELLO LISTENERS

A few quick things—this isn’t a newsletter but it’s “news”— ZORT III will be out Monday. I’m out of town. Blame me. I’m half lying right now but how much do you really need to know? I’m out of town. Where I am is my business. ZORT III is out Monday. What else could possibly make you happy? ZORT III now? But you ask for the impossible. ZORT III is out Monday.

We also now have Tips@trueanon.com —it’s not a totally encrypted email so don’t be stupid or anything. We’ll probably have an encrypted one up soon but still. Don’t be stupid is just a good general rule. It’s great advice to give someone when they’re about to do something stupid, too.

This is the Tip phone number as well: (646) 801-1129 why not throw it in. For good measure. That’s the TIP LINE PHONE NUMBER.

We also have a TikTok and are doing short form videos on the YouTube as well now. You can find those by searching “TRUEANON”, the name of this show.

Also for anyone wondering about ZORT or unable to follow it due to an attention span annihilated via short form video content: It is the story of a young Alec Monopoly style Bitcoin criminal kingpin in LA named Adam Iza—and a laptop that has a fortune locked on it.

ADAM IZA: Main player. CEO OF ZORT. Involved in numerous scams and is currently in jail after pleading guilty to a host of crimes, including using a gang of LASD deputies to terrorize and rob people of crypto. Had a bunch of companies he used to launder money. Had leg lengthening surgery.

IRIS: Adam’s (now ex) gf. Much older than Adam. Involved in ZORT and several other companies that Adam started. Much more in third episode. Claims EZ stole a laptop from Adam Iza.

EZ: Amazing actor. Previously friends and business partners with Adam Iza. According to some court documents, some allege he possesses (?) an HP Specter laptop containing anywhere from 100 million to a billion dollars in Bitcoin. He alleges differently. Much more in third episode.

TROY WOODY: Evil guy that killed his girlfriend, Tomi Masters, in the Philippines. Sued Adam Iza, claiming Iza and EZ robbed him of a bunch of devices w considerable amounts of crypto in them. One of those devices is an HP Specter laptop.

Those are the major players SO FAR. The real story is the struggle for control of the laptop—much more on that in Episode III. We will also introduce a number of other people. Sorry. Would you rather fewer people exist in the world in order to make episodes “easier to understand”? Not so great when it’s put it like that? A bit nasty, no? But I digress. Besides I’m out of town right now and can’t write this much longer. ZORT III is out Monday.

Love BB LF YC

Comments

Tobias

👁️👁️🚬

Cole

okay thanks

Shaggy

Zort, sort, riort

Brendan Kneeland

I want everything explained to me in this manner 💜

eduard karpoev

Am I stupid or didn't y'all say this would involve Paris at some point?

Sam Bondurant

Will Brace be courtside w chalamet tonight??

Zane

Kill em all, let God Zort em out 🚬

Dan

ZORT

Pelican Grief

I'm actually someone who wishes ZORT was much harder to understand, OK?

Lynds

For anyone with the same brain-melting cultural venn diagram as me, I feel the need to share: IRIS’S CURRENT BOYFRIEND IS DAVIDE FROM LOVE ISLAND

King Krang

He's the goddam judge

Quinn

The character breakdown is incredible! Thank you!

Shaggy

Throw back a bottle of liberal tears

el

zort zort zort zort

Damian

Zort III is out Monday

Lars

But when is ZORT IV out? 🤔🤔🤔🤨

RC

She zort on my Specter til I HP

bee

I love you guys lol

Tim

Zort the Third

Tori

When will Liz comment on the bravo zort crossover??

Quinn Redman

Thank u for the rundown I personally take notes when listening but I know other don’t

Mikachu

im ZORTing it

vlopz

Z

Hollz

ZORT

Char

This was actually v helpful! Ty

Nite Life Jesse

when i find the laptop i will cast it into the sea

Psalm Frond

For sooth, we're gonna zort this out before the end

Rebolledont

is brace looking for the famous laptop hp specter on his own?

David Haigh

I feel somewhat letdown that the Tiktok isn't just supercuts of Brace's fucked up feed like on IG. PLEASE REMEDY THIS XOX

sister love

zorting it love island style 😘

Blank

Tysm recap was helpful

Winston Reid

It’s crazy how much that crypto torture case in NYC mirrors this one. Some NYPD detectives just got put on leave for working security for the perpetrators.

Rodigan

This is still too hard to understand. I'll run it through my proprietary Baby Brace LLM.

Gaige Kaser

Episode 3 is my favorite Star Wars, so this will probably be my favorite! Thanks for sharing.

cori

@grok can you read this to me in the voice of maye musk but also even sexier

Ian Mc

@grok can you explain how zort relates to adult baby diaper

Brian Ward

I thought Alec monopoly was one of the zort characters' names for a second

Shiv

ZORT

Shiv

deny, depose, zort

Leanders

QAA just put out an episode about a psychologist who started a Bigfoot movement; he claims the footies go by the name ZORTH and have healing and precognitive powers and are MAGA. For a second thought this was a moment of synchronicity but am equally content to learn about this ZORT.

Shaggy

Appetizer, entree, dezort

Major Pisano

Opsec brother, no one needs to know what where how or why. It just is. Unless they do and still, silent moves. Silence is the key. (Also love brace voice shining through writing)

Major Pisano

Damn..she ZORT on it? And then you hp’d?!? Shoots homie hope it works out for you two, she sounds cool.

Father Slime

Don’t care what it means, it’s Zort summer and I will not stop saying it

Father Slime

Reply here for hot tips on credit cards

Danny

holy shit

NOTICING THINGS

have we already discussed that Adam Iza’s initials are “AI” ??? 😳

420_WEED_MANIAC_69

BUY THE DIP GUY'S COZ WE'RE GOING TO THE MOON #ZORT #ZORTLIFE

The Fine Art Revolution

I find this saga to be much easier to comprehend since everyone isn't named "David"

Eli Herrnstadt

First thing that comes up on the YouTube search is an ad for turning point usa 😂

Barry

Can you confirm if Liz's "ZORT!" tourettes has gotten worse? I hope so.

Salt.

She [verb] on my TROY WOODY til I ZORT

Barn

Zortin in my shorts over here

Jack

ZORT ZORT ZORT

Norman Mineta

EZ’s SoundCloud is something else. Proud to be the third listen!

Phil Darovic

It's just confusing as to who is out of town

snorlax

what in the pynchonic fuck

Gallo Altanero

Shit may have messed don’t send something dumb part. Already. Ignore.

Sam S.

Love the summary, it'd be great if you guys could make some for the other series like the Syrian civil war JFK or synanon

Wawaweewa

“Don’t write the names in the comments be cool”

Tim O'

👁️

Jeff

This is probably not the right venue for this question, but I just joined the Patreon: is there a list somewhere of subscriber-only episodes that I can follow to get caught up? I can make one myself by comparing the two feeds, but it occurred to me something like this might just already exist.

Justin T.

Zort is really boring, its giving... nothing.

Barry

ZORT me a river