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25.57 - 25.58 (Patreon)

Published:
2026-10-24 14:00:17
Edited:
2026-10-25 00:37:10
Imported:

Content

Breathe through the pain

Files

Comments

SharkBoyKade

okay okay, I'm glad Casey is staying like as calm as he can. I'm sure it's probably going to escalate but I'm glad he's staying calm right now.

xoxx.diana

his face is breaking me omg 😭🫩

june

peace i’m gonna go read back through the happy times to cope with the angst 🫶✌️

Atlas

screammmingggggggggggg crying throwing up rolling in it then off a cliff.....WHY BITTIEEEEEEE. i need liam to get decked and for them to finally both say i love you as financial compensation thank you very much

Lou

I think I blacked out what happened so I could have a normal week bc as soon as I got the notification it all came flooding back

Megan

Why are you doing this to us

ManaR

I can feel how Casey feels and I wish I could be there to hug him..

mixhelle

Oh no I want to wrap Sooch in a big cozy blanket 😭 I‘m happy they started talking 😭 Can someone tell me if they had a talk about smoking? Because Sooch did that too and I can’t remember him having a problem with it :( Is it because of the kiss? And the past where Howie kissed him too while they were high?

xoxx.diana

we need to change the vibe rn

ainswix

Oh God my babies… i know Casey is doing the right thing by letting Howie sober up first while he thinks about wtf happened, but it still hurts

Sassley

The look on howie’s face when sooch shrunk away from him 😭😭

balls

OH MY GOD IT HURTS

fweenie

oh my god… the pain is awful

Lilli

Those weekly updates are killing me 😅 I'm glad Sooch tries to listen to Howie. But I'm still not sure this will end well... Howie maybe you should start by saying sorry?! Fucking Liam this is such a fucking mess 😭😭😭

spewpa

Guys I can’t take this- one week stat a time my heart is BREAKING 😭😭

Touka

The way I got so fkn scared when I saw the notification 😭😭😭

bane

happy thoughts i’m thinking happy thoughts </3

Quint James

We ride at dawn! Liam shall fall by dusk!

Boo

Smol sad boy 🥺

ainswix

yeah he being high it’s not the problem, the problem is that casey doesn’t want to talk with howie in that state

ShayLeigh Street

Who are you telling to breathe through the pain? Us or them? 😭

Sarah B

I'm glad Casey is recognizing that Howie is under the influence. I don't remember but did they talk about not getting high? Is sooch also upset that Howie partook in drugs?

Krissy

I feel like doing some violent things to Liam right now

fourinth

I know sooch knows how down bad Howie is for him I have trust that it will be ok!

Dug

Oof

Mistral

I mean, all these things are true...

mixhelle

Ahhh okay yeah that makes sense!

Angel

Okay, unpopular opinion (Don’t Come for Me!) I’m a little annoyed at Sooch. With ALL the information at his disposal : Howie’s been in love with Sooch for TIME, messages him about what he’s doing & where he’s been, says the major 3 words and hasn’t asked for them back, has taken everything so slow just not to scare. Sooch away…I just. *deep breath* Maybe it’s not going that direction. Probably.

Mistral

And probably that he was getting high with Liam, which brings back bad memories for them. Casey probably thinks Howie shouldn't trust Liam to get high with. I've never been high but I'd imagine it's best to only do it with trusted friends.

Ana Gaston

Oh noo my baby Casey needs a hug now 😢😢

Chris (Bedazel)

Thats IT im crawling through the screen!

Heatherbee

Great now we’re all hurt and confused

Haven

I am heartbroken watching this

Kiranebula

Im DYING like I want them to resolve it now but also Howie you're high, give Casey space and sober up 😭😭😭😭

Jade

Liam better sleep with both eyes open i stg im gonna LOSE IT

Ducky

My heart. I said I was going to take a few weeks break and didn't and his face is making me cryyyyy. My booboo!!

LV

🥺

mixhelle

Yeah that’s true, but until now I think Howie thought Liam was a trusted friend and you can’t really blame him for that 🥺

happybunnyntx

I have been and got anxiety at least once. Can confirm, it's best with someone trusted. Bad trips happen and you want someone you know won't take advantage of that. Either pulling something like Liam while you're relaxed or taking advantage while you're trying not to have a panic attack if it's bad.

Shikotsu 93

He probably knows that Howie is telling the truth. Still…it doesn’t make it any easier. He can’t unsee what he saw

happybunnyntx

I have to agree. It doesn't make any sense in any scenario for Howie to pull something like this on purpose after everything we've seen. If Howie had refused to go public with their relationship then it might be shady, but he's wanted to be open from day one.

Stephanie

Pleeeeease Sooch please trust your man! You know how much of an ass Liam is!!

stinky

Aw man I didn't know Casey was anti 420 c'mon brosef

Clover Jean

Casey's face in the second slide STOPPPP 😭😭

Willow

Sooch, the fact that he's this high also means he couldn't really consent 🥺 Be easy on our himbo pls (although sooch is 100% allowed to be hurt, I just don't want him to think Howie did this on purpose 😭)

Barbs

Liam when I catch you Liam

Pat

Yes, Howie was high and didn’t consent and Liam took advantage of that and SA’d Howie. Report his ass!!

Dave B

It feels like Casey's next words will be, "Go home. Go to bed. We talk when you're sober."

Am

I can't cry on the bus 😖 Caseyyyyy!

Umbrathor

Oh, you think that is what he means by: 'You're high?"

ainswix

i’m hopping so or else i’m crying

lee :)

and then i was shot 40 times in the chest

Umbrathor

Ainswix has a valid theory, but we are only seeing the first sentence Sooch says in response to Howie's statement. Which is coherent and clear, so 'you're high' is not likely to mean: you don't know what you are saying / doing. I think Sooch might continue by saying: "'Just like on that night when I found you on the curb. You were drunk and high, completely fucked. And you had been with Liam." My theory is: * Liam got Howie drunk and high that night to confess * Howie told Liam he is in love with Sooch * Liam dumps Howie on the street, Howie has zero memory of any of it * Next time he sees Sooch, Liam gets aggressive and slams him into the wall.

Pheobe Jackson

Howie's about to never drink or smoke another day in his life

Shrimp

Casey’s face right before Howie reaches for him is gonna make me cry. I’m PRAYING that the “you’re high” is gonna be a “sober up before we have this conversation” type thing. IM PRAYING GUYS. PLEASE let them have an actual conversation about this PLEASE.

Umbrathor

If what Howie is saying does not immediately make Sooch feel better, that is valid. No one can control how they feel.

angela rios

Idk, for me it brought up like, we were high when you kissed me the first time. Like hes wondering if this is a habit of Howie's and hes worried and insecure about what he just saw. If this is a habit of yours then what does that mean for how we got started. What does this mean.trust wise for the future

Umbrathor

Howie need not say sorry, since he did nothing wrong - other than trust Liam. And Sooch never told him the reasons why Howie should not trust Liam.

Umbrathor

Maybe Sooch is puilling away because he feels bad about never telling Howie what happened with Liam. My theory is: * That night when Sooch found Howie on the curb, Liam had gotten Howie drunk and high to confess and find out whether Howie reciprocated those feelings * Howie told Liam he is in love with Sooch * Liam got angry and dumped Howie on the street (Howie has zero memory of any of it) * Next time he saw Sooch, Liam got aggressive and slammed him into the wall.

literarilyanerd

I think it’s entirely possible that Casey understands the circumstances but I think even with all that knowledge seeing your partner in that position would make you (involuntarily) feel some kinda way. I’m hopeful they resolve this in an a mature way and that Casey finally tells Howie what Liam did to him 🤞

Umbrathor

It is every author's job to make us Feel Things. You are all making Bittie a great compliment.

JellyBee

totally agree ! especially after being assaulted and verbally abused by the person who took advantage of your significant other.

JellyBee

i really hope Casey marches back over and punches that loser in the face. him realizing that Howie is high and was taken advantage of must be so infuriating, ESPECIALLY after how Liam treated him in the past.

Umbrathor

There are several possible reasons why Casey is backing away now. But since he got VERY drunk on more than one occasion, I don't think Casey is against the use of intoxicants. My theory is that Sooch is connecting the dots: Howie was also high and drunk when Sooch found him on the curb. What if Liam made a pass at Howie that night as well? Or to confess and find out whether Howie felt the same? Howie would have told him he loved Sooch, which might have caused Liam to dump Howie, and get aggressive the next time he saw Sooch.

Umbrathor

All of what you say is so true and valid. Maybe Sooch backing off isn't because he is blaming Howie though. maybe it is becayuse he blames HIMSELF for not protecting Howie against Liam. He could have told Howie about Liam assaulting him. Sooch already connected the dots that Liam may be into Howie. Howie was high and drunk that night when Sooch found him on the curb. What if Liam made a pass at Howie that night as well? Or to confess and find out whether Howie felt the same? Howie would have told him he loved Sooch, which might have caused Liam to dump Howie, and get aggressive the next time he saw Sooch.

Umbrathor

Sad smol sweet boi.

Umbrathor

You are jumping to what is almost certainly the wrong conclusion.

Umbrathor

But Liam's ass didn't do anything yet! Though it probably wanted to.

Umbrathor

I am not! I'm a little scared but also excited. Because I have a theory (that I have written on many places in these comments).

HannaLuLu

I would LOVE to see a flashback of that night from Liam (was originally going to say Howie but he clearly doesn't remember it 😅)

HannaLuLu

Sooch's FACE!! Ugh he is so heartbroken in this moment. To have opened himself so much to Howie and walk into THAT. 💔😭

Griffin Aarts

☹️☹️ omg you're so right and now my day is doubly ruined

JoastyJoe

His big sad tired eyes oh I can’ttt

Billy Maz

The look on Sooch's face in the fourth panel is killing me 😭

Lew Exists

Liam stop ruining everything 😭

stinky

Same as Casey lmfao I'm jk

Mar

I need the angst to end rn 😭😭 I'm so scared

Blueberry

He looks sooooo sad☹️☹️☹️☹️ I wanna hug him so baddddd omg😭😭😭😭

Sweets

See I agree with you and I'm sure that's in Sooch's back of the mind but.... He just saw his man kissing someone else of course he's gonna feel some kinda way. Like he knows that Howie loves the hell out of him and would likely not do that when in his five senses but that doesn't take away the fact that it also hurts to witness. I mean we feel hella hurt and rage as the readers imagine the character 😢😢

Non-binary Pineapple

Liam’s lucky he’s fictional otherwise it’d be on sight 😠😤

sloggedoff

I feel so bad for them both. Casey probably has so much going through his head. Like, my boyfriend is high, the guy who seems jealous was just kissing him, obviously not consensual and what Howie is saying proves that, but also I’m hurt, how could he do this, and so much more… like no wonder he looks so scared. He probably doesn’t know what to think. So many conflicting feelings

Shauna Ayers

If Sooch says he needs to be alone for a bit, I think stoned Howie is going to lose it and go back to beat Liam to a pulp...maybe seeing that might not be a bad thing for Sooch's insecurities. Regardless, I think Sooch will make it a rule that he cannot get stoned without Sooch being glued to his side....

Jennifer Cunningham

This is the most painful series of Saturdays! I keep hoping for a rare double upload Saturday lol Hopefully the "You're high" will be followed by understanding of why he was so confused. I just want them to be okay 😭

Sharon Stogner

How does Casey feel about Howie getting high? Hard to make good decisions when you’re high.

Charlie

Oh! I didnt even think of it like that I thought Liam just left him because hes a bad friend and he slammed Sooch into the wall because he was projecting his own self-hate on the sooch because sooch is liams crushes closest friend. I like your theory much better. Then the kiss is cause he got jealous

peachy keen

Going through this whole situation and being high is a nightmare oh my goodness 😭😭 I feel so bad for both of them.... not Liam though, like liam knows Howie is dating sooch like being queer and homophobic is wild brother

Kris

I know right. This poor guys trust is likely gone forever.

Charlie

Im just imagining how upset Sooch must feel, hes been waiting for Howie, gets a message that hes at Liams, waits before going over then his phone call gets ignored and he finds Liam kissing Howie and that Howie is high with the guy who left Howie defenseless the last time he was high with him. Im sure hes feeling self-conscious and worried, despite everyone here knowing Howie is head over heels for him.

Sunny Rae

I’m breathing, Bittie, IM BREATHING

Kris

Im glad Howie is being as clear as he is even though he’s high. 💞

Paperboy

Pls don’t, I hate misunderstandings 😫

peapodleaf

I lwk don’t think Scooch is mad at Howie at all, I feel like he’s gonna blame himself bc if he would’ve told Howie what Liam did to him, Howie would’ve never gone over there in the first place. But he doesn’t want to tell Howie while he’s high.

queerdhd

Oh Casey.. my poor baby

Arii

I'm flipping the fuck out. Casey is as calm as he can and I'm glad that's the case and that the situation will be acknowledged at their home.

Salem

im more mad that he ignored sooch's call. all he had to do was answer and say he was hanging out a little longer :'( he hurt our son!!!

Sara Kristen

Omg Casey’s face, him trying to make himself as small as possible, it’s breaking my heart! 💔😭

Gary Benedict

CASEY CMON YK HES TELLING THE TRUTH

emma

I'm gonna go cry in a corner for a week ;-; Sooch's expression in the second page is so heartbreaking...

Lexi

If he doesn’t immediately get mad at Liam for taking advantage of Howie because he’s high… im flipping the coffee table

Umbrathor

Yep, jealousy and desperation. And lowered inhibitions due to intoxicants.

Naky Gelin

Public sentencing for Liam tonight. I vote Death penalty.

Jamie13

I need peace to return. I have to beat up Liam, I am so sorry but I'm very much over him. And Sooch... Urgh! His heart is so torn right now! I cannot imagine. I am so sad for both of them

Laura

AAAHHHHHHHH

pagingdraly

Oh I felt that squeeze and shrink in my soul. Protective and reflexive of yourself like if you're just a small enough target, the pain can't hit you

Julia

Hmmmmm🤔

Julia

I’m breathing, I am, but I’m really just trying to look forward to next week, I need to know how we get through this.

Luna_Lena

Can I breathe and also punch Liam?

Amanda

WHY DID YOU PUT THIS THOUGHT IN MY HEAD

ainswix

angela omg your brain my week it’s ruined

Amanda

Casey backing away from Howie hurts but I’d be doing the same. He’s in no position to give comfort right now. I’m hoping “you’re high” is going to be followed by why they shouldn’t get into it right now. Personally if I’m going to have a rational conversation, I need some time to be alone and process things first; absolutely nothing good will happen if I try to engage right away. And in this case Howie isn’t in his right mind, which makes a serious talk impossible anyway.

Bekahbookwyrm

They're gonna get through this, right? It's gonna hurt for a bit and it's a major setback, but we gotta trust that they might be in an even better place afterwards.

Josie Olson

Who’s ready to go teach Liam a lesson with me that he should have learned long ago?

Meno

Oh I’m crushed Casey’s face is wounding me deeply and don’t even get me started on Howie’s reaction, it’s giving the first kiss angst all over again I can’t 😭

dj_bexly

Do you think Bittie hates us, yes or yes?

Red Elizabeth

Ok but, Liam kind of assaulted him. He knew he was high, had offered him the drugs, he manuvered the situation. Howie had no reason to think he was being put in a sexual situation, the thought Liam was straight.

Trey

How are you possibly annoyed at Sooch when he hasn’t spoken nearly the entire time 😭😭 he calmly walked back home ?

GenericBones

I'm wondering if Sooch is upset that Howie is high bc that means Liam was taking advantage of him. (Just along with everything else.)

Isa

now what the hell 🤨

A.R.Walker

I'd laugh, but I'm too busy breathing through the pain 🥲😭

JoastyJoe

nahh he’s also gotten high before

Josie Olson

How many more weeks do I have to live like this 😭 I just want Liam to have to deal with the consequences of his fucking actions already!!!!

OR-69

No. I think he is developing an interesting story and we should be patient, if we want to see what happens next.

Alisha Caldera

Ok God, the anxiety I was feeling coming into this page

Audrey M

Once Howie sobers up, I hope they have a long and honest conversation about Liam and their relationship and Howie's friendship with him. I definitely think dumping Liam as a friend is a good idea. I would suggest going NC with him but they're neighbors and might have some mutual friends so LC might be better till they're out of school (especially if either of them have a class with him and have to partner with him for a project). I would also suggest that they have a last conversation with Liam about everything before going LC/NC.

Rain

Oh this is a brutal week to be getting hit with this. Please end our suffering.

Audrey M

Also that I think Howie and maybe Sooch should cut back on the drinking/smoking (which they rarely do that part), especially at parties. I think if it's a dinner date 1 glass of wine is fine or a meal with 1 beer bottle with close friends is also fine imo, but also have a ton of water, non alcoholic beverages, and/or coffee if the establishment offers it.

Kuup.Nomz28

Ooohhhh I’m loving this theory!!!!! Never thought of it this way 🤯🤯

angela rios

Yea I could be wrong theres so many theories lol I just reread recently and it just made me realized the first time Howie kissed sooch he was high and drunk and it was the same night Liam ditched him at the pizza place. Then they kissed again while smoking during the power outage. Now he finds Howie drunk and high again, in the middle of a kiss with Liam. I dont even think it matters that he didnt participate but I'd have issues with Howie getting high as well. There's gonna be trust issues moving forward anytime Howie wants to go out and Sooch doesnt.

Flamey

Well done with the flashback for Sooch about how Howie kissed him the first time while he was high, Bittie (at least I think that's what could be on his mind...)!

snappyfixture

Omg nooooo. You are so smart I didn’t even think of that and now I’m extra sad. Fuuuuck. Casey 😭

a4200

Not coming for you, but I disagree. Sooch has warned Howie many times that Liam was sketchy, and while this definitely wasn't his fault, I can still see why he might be mad. After he's left him stranded and laughed in his face when he came out, which Howie admitted he should've known would happen, why even stay at his party? Love Howie and all, but it's not always good to be the oblivious himbo.

J.K. Hogan

Yer killin me Smalls

Marilee

So we’re all bout to jump liam right??

Danny

TOTALLYYYY 🥲🥲🥲🥲

Danny

When we catch you Lian

Danny

OHMYGOSH THAT WOULD MAKE A LOT OF SENSE!!!!!!

Umbrathor

a4200: But to me Sooch doesn't look mad, in the last few panels. I think he looks hurt, and shocked.

a4200

I suppose we don't know for sure yet. His clenched grip tells he's holding it in until Howie sobers up. Or at least holding the urge to take his hand.

Azien

I hate that we're using his government name. We never use the government name.

DDonovan

I hope knowing Howie’s high helps Sooch understand that Howie’s impaired right now, so his reactions aren’t the same. He didn’t take part in that kiss, he was stunned and didn’t know what to do. Please believe him, Sooch!

Sêr

omg this is stressing me out

Hope

Noooo 😭😭

Millie J

I left for a few months and THIS is what I come back to...

Goose

We’ll get you Lion

Rubi

Me reading this while currently high: 😮

Choc

I’m accepting this theory as canon. Thank ya 🖤

Danielle Wilson

Babes…by which I mean my love Casey…now isn’t the time while he’s high…but you gotta tell him. Liam is NOT safe to be high around. I know Howie should know this after last time but you gotta just tell him and now with this he’ll get it. You two have to work this out together 😩🌊

Audrey Gudino

ahhhhhhh I cant do this right I needed them to be happy and in love pleaseeeeeee I cant like I want to ask you to update quicky but at the same time take your time I just need them to be end game pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Teri Hano

OOUUUAGHHH 😭😭😭 MY STOMACH

RevyBlack

Liam needs to meet an anonymous “Good Samaritan” in a dark alley

E4star

Howie and sooch protection squad we ride at dawn

Eyeshanih

Oh nononono I hate you liam omg I knew it.