Update: YOUTUBE REACTIONS ARE MOVING (Patreon)

Hello everyone, PD here.

In a few weeks I will be making an announcement on YouTube but I wanted to give my Patrons a more personal explanation.

Over these past few weeks I've been very busy but I've also had a lot of time to myself to think.

The past two months my health has been failing and my mental health has been taking a dive. My will to film, my will to make content, my will to live was fragile. And I mention living with filming because to me they are one and the same.

Even though I took a break from filming, my condition was worsening. And I knew it too, there's no way my work load is the reason I'm dying because not having it in my life has made me very depressed.

After much soul searching and a lot of collaborative effort later, MOOD MKR was born with my good friend and housemate Dezzy March. If this is your first time hearing about MOOD MKR, check out our new channel.

You see, my mental health was failing because I was not being creative enough. I was not regularly creating art in my life. I know this sounds silly, but I literally live and breathe creativity and the lack of it has been stressing me out. I've never lived my life for money, no matter how poor I was, I lived life fearlessly. But now that I have a family depending on me, I live for money and not for art and it's troubled me deeply.

Launching MOOD MKR has been quite the undertaking almost half a year in the making, too many stories and incidents to tell just to get to this point. But the past few weeks have been some of my most exciting as we have been failing forward with MOOD MKR.

But: keeping MOOD MKR and my YouTube channel and my Patreon... Now that's too much. I mean it's quite physically impossible for me to have the time for all this. And so we are adjusting our work schedules and our platforms to adapt to our new normal.

But even with all these changes coming here's the TL;DR for all you Patrons: nothing will really change for you. It will be just a slight shift but the content you get won't change.

So here's what I mean: I won't be reacting to videos on YouTube anymore like I do now. I'm not stopping, I'm just moving them over to Patreon. Lowest tier. This decision has been in the work for months. I thought it carefully after seeing a comment on a video from a long time subscriber saying that they would be unsubscribing. They like and still support me but they only subscribed to watch me talk about "video/filmmaking" points and finds that I talk too much about the groups themselves and the music nowadays. 

They're right. But the thing is... What more can I say? How many times can I explain the same technique? How many times can I talk about lighting in the SAME way? There are occasional innovations (cough ATBO) that really spark my juice but here's the thing: I talk about videos less because almost EVERY video is impressive nowadays. That's why the only times I do talk about the video aspect of a release, I go REALLY hard in and technical on it.

I'm not proud of my YouTube content. It's not because I don't like my reactions: I want to do MORE. I hate how fucking ignorant I sound sometimes because all I had was a blind first impression. Context. I believe context is king and to not have that is frustrating! But I can't also justify making EVERY video on YouTube 40 minutes long.

That's why I'm moving my reactions to Patreon. I'll still be reacting to all the same groups (maybe even more) but with more added segments. It wouldn't be for EVERY video but for example: If Group A has a comeback, I'd do my usual reaction and review and sometimes go in depth if I love something, but if I really liked the comeback I might then watch a live stage or clips from their showcase, all in the same video. This makes it more convenient for you all so there's less jumping around and you can just pause and pick it up at your own pace, and for me it makes it more creativity fulfilling to do, thus aiding my overall well being. 

We will also be creating a NEW reaction channel that's not the current MOOD MKR channel. I'll be reacting to major releases over there with Dezz or interesting releases over there and be doing reactions and discussions of them. We wanted to make professional in depth and polished videos that truly highlight these comebacks and debuts well.

So TL;DR what does this mean for you?

If you're a Patron, you'll be getting all reactions on here. One platform. No need to jump around anymore with the added plus of more live stage and studio chooms, dance practices etc. The YouTube reactions will be even better! And of course you'll still be getting all variety/kdrama/listeningparty reactions as well.

If you're not a Patron, you'll only be getting a few reactions on the new reaction channel with Dezz.

And what does this mean for the FORM OF THERAPY channel? I'll still be posting but it'll be more like once a week rather than a ton in a few days. I'm going to be treating FORM OF THERAPY more like an alternate K-Pop Education channel. Podcasts, discussions, teaching Korean, reviews of songs, reviews of albums, etc. 

Initially I thought I came out the pandemic fine but only to learn its influence was more subliminal, and yet I didn't realize until now it had killed my creativity as well. 

Apologies for this long post. And even with all that I never even told anyone MOOD MKR's real master plan. We actually have big goals and declarations with this channel, but I must keep quiet for now what our true intentions are but once that video is out everything will make sense. 

I hope all of you will follow me on this endeavor as I get wild and creative with all this. I seriously considered just quitting reacting; it was a real struggle. But Dezz and I talked it out and we LOVE reacting. We fucking love our little communities here and so even if it's more work we're opting to keep our reactions going just on our own individual Patreon!

I sincerely hope you consider staying a Patron or even upping your pledge. Again, you won't be getting any less content, it'll still be the same, it's just going to be published only here. 

You don't need to give anything more, I'm just being honest about how bad our situation is. All I hope is that you consider staying because all our misfortunes over the past few months have only stoked a flame inside us and made us even more determined to make GOOD. QUALITY. CONTENT. THAT. MAKES. PEOPLE. HAPPY.

Aiite, PD out. Love y'all. Treat yourself better please and be courageous. I'm trying to do the same. I'm scared out of my mind to do this, I'm risking my income, my family's well being, my life! But sometimes if you want to make real change you have to disrupt some shit.