Hall Pass: Part 3 (Patreon)

Here's the next instalment of my story about a guy who gets cucked by the his boyfriend's 'hall pass' who just happens to be staying in the same hotel.

I never would have predicted that three nights into our Sydney holiday Bradley would be leaving me behind in our hotel room to go on a date with another man. 

You’d think I would be angry at him, but honestly I wasn’t. I felt… well, I wasn’t sure what I felt. I guess I was nervous and stressed out about it; I could feel it in my chest and the pit of my stomach. But it was also exciting. It reminded me of how I used to feel back when I was single and I’d be getting ready for a date. Funny how it could be such a similar feeling now, even though I wasn’t the one actually going on the date. 

The rules were that whatever happened, happened. I must be such an idiot to have agreed to that. A drink was one thing, but was I seriously going to sit by and let him go back to Luca Rivera’s hotel room for sex? Stay the night, even?

I guess I was about to find out.

The other rule was to keep me updated. So as I sat on the bed watching hotel TV my eyes would flick across to my phone on the bed next to me every ten seconds or so, until I realised I was starting to drive myself crazy.

I considered going for a walk to distract myself. I figured I really needed the distraction otherwise I was going to lose my mind sitting here focused on waiting for my phone to light up. There was still plenty to see in this city too, even if I was doing it on my own. Surely I could find some interesting sights to preoccupy myself with.

And when I realised it would give me a chance to pass by the lobby and possibly catch a glimpse of Bradley and Luca on their date, the decision pretty much made itself. 

I knew that was kind of messed up; I’d given Bradley permission to do this thing without me so I shouldn’t go trying to spy on him. I didn’t even understand why I’d want to; it was twisting me up in angsty knots tight enough just thinking about it, surely it would be worse to actually see it. But as soon as the idea was in my mind there was no chance I was going to let the idea go, I was totally fixated on it by this point.

It was busy in the lobby, so I immediately felt self-conscious. I also knew that with all these people around I couldn’t be too obvious trying to catch a glimpse of them. I only had one opportunity for a walk-by, and only a couple of seconds’ window to catch a look.

I felt like some kind of secret agent, the way I was hiding in plain sight, about to cross through this plush hotel lobby, one chance to lay eyes on my target without anyone else clocking what was going on. My heart was pounding. A deep breath, and I went for it. 

I sauntered casually, headed for the door but eyes wandering to take in my surroundings. As I passed the entrance to the bar I glanced over, seemingly aimlessly, and I managed to get a look at them. They were sitting together at a table for two, ninety degrees from each other, bodies close together. Bradley was laughing at something Luca had said, and the body language on display said they were getting along. And just at that moment, in that second I was looking in their direction, Bradley laid his hand on Luca’s forearm, just for a second.

I could almost feel it on my own skin, and it felt like pure sexual energy. A touch like that, everyone knows what that is. Perfectly calibrated to linger for just a long moment, to signal intention while being easy to brush off as meaning nothing if not reciprocated.

I wanted to stop, to watch more. But I couldn’t. Two more steps and they were out of view, so I’d never see what happened next.

By the time I got out onto the street I felt breathless and shaky. I leaned against the side of the building, and let out a single word. “Fuck.” I wasn’t even sure what I meant by it. Fuck, that was intense. Fuck, that was a trip. Fuck, what the hell have I done letting Bradley do this?

I was a wreck. I needed to calm myself down, think of anything besides whatever chemistry Bradley and Luca were forming together. I went for a long walk around the neighbourhood, looking in the shops that hadn’t closed yet, stopping in to galleries, until I found a bar where I could go sit down and calm my nerves with a drink. The whole time though, the image of the two of them was burned into my mind and was the only thing I could think of.

As I finished my drink and pondered what to do next, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I went for it so fast I almost dropped the drink in my hand. When I pulled it I saw on the screen — as expected — that I had a message from Bradley.

We’re going to get dinner, it said.

My throat went dry instantly and my heart rate picked up with nervous excitement. The date was going well then.

At least that news settled my plans for me: I was getting dinner alone tonight. So I wandered around until I found somewhere that looked appealing, got a table for one, and ate dinner silently in a window seat while I watched people pass by on the street. I kept my phone on the table so I could see immediately if Bradley messaged me again, but he didn’t.

I walked home after dinner, glancing in the window of every restaurant on the off-chance I’d see Bradley and Luca in there, but no luck. I still hadn’t heard from Bradley by the time I got home, so I settled into a movie to try to take my mind off him.

It was about nine thirty when he finally messaged. I was trembling when I picked up the phone, because I already knew what it was going to be. There would be no point messaging if he was almost home. Still, I wasn’t ready to see the words on the screen.

We’re going back to his hotel room.