Hot Dog Store: Be Cool, Just Click The Link (Patreon)

Shit’s weird this week. Don’t make eye contact, we can get through this as long as we play it smart.

It’s America’s favorite mascot, Jimmy Jiggles!

Look at him on this healthy man. You can be healthy man with shirt. Buy shirt with Jimmy Jiggles! Save a life!

This man has never held a mug in his damn life. You had ONE JOB and now we are all DOOMED because you couldn’t be assed to face Jimmy toward the camera you smug son of a fuck.

What is WITH everyone this week? Something in the air.

Oh boy, it’s worse than I thought.

We are Corey. And if you’re not, you soon will be. Available only in the vault, your ticket to being part of something greater than yourself. You are accepted. You belong. You should buy a shirt.