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We have Alex on today to first and foremost look at newly released soda rankings. Then, we catch up on reactions to Trump’s conviction, examine the many Rubicons people are always crossing, and ask if Barron will be Augustus Batman or something. Then, two new banger campaign ads from new MAGA star Valentina Gomez. Finally, a long reading series about Erik Prince’s far-right podcast group chat, and the various good & normal opinions shared there from the many luminaries in his orbit.

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bogswallop

Ah, just in time for my commute Mr. Chapo

Beev

Dr Fauci is actually Dr Pepper it’s all true

JD Nonce

Ahh the joy of taking off all of my clothes and listening to the newest episode of my favorite podcast on a midnight drive around a Walmart parking lot

Jo Blo

Wassup!

m@tt

Mr.Pibb stock rising on the news

Michael S. Judge

If one were going to be nude, Will, one would want privacy for that sort of thing

Antipaganda

Hey Alex, Tokyo got burned to the fucking ground during WW2. Just FYI. Bombing restraint on the part of Douglas Macarthur was not the reason Japan recovered after ww2.

Dan

Pibb Extra is significantly better than Dr.Pepper. In my Canadian city, the only place to get Pibb Extra is from the Coca Cola Freestyle machines at one movie theatre chain.

Waffle Poet

Mr. Nichols is effortlessly fucking quick-witted.

Tyler Silvas

According to her LinkedIn, Valentina worked for Purina for two years.

Michael S. Judge

I love the Barron posts where they predict his rise to Punisher Ozymandias above a photo where he looks the tallest castrato in Casanova's Venice

Evan Pitkin

I wish Iran had a nuke just so we could be done hearing every conservative psycho describe their own invasion plan.

j

So damn funny

McMiller

Epi cuts off at 32 seconds for me

Last Years Man

Curtis "Bombs away" Lemay. The town where I live now, Toyama, also got bombed the shit out of. And let's not forget Okinawa.

Last Years Man

I laughed so hard at "Mess with us and we will eat your shit" that my son won't talk to me for a year

ohnoitsthefuzz

It detected you're a Hunt's ketchup fan. Try rewinding a bit and firmly declaring out loud that "There is no ketchup but Heinz and John Kerry is It's Messenger."

Last Years Man

God damn it, I am so fucking sick of the way everyone talks about politics now. The libertarians say the "neo cons" are trying to start wars on behalf of a global cabal and that Russia will save us. The ones they call the "Neo cons" say they're "paleoconservatives" who want to start wars to defeat the "global cabal," and that Donald Trump will save us. The liberals say that RUssia is trying to take over the world and that Trump is trying to destroy democracy. The Alex Jones crowd says the "globalist" left is trying to destroy democracy. Everyone thinks they're part of the side that's fighting the secret enemy.

b-rar

Dr Pepper is fucking abominable and I condemn the Chapo gang as counterrevolutionary for their pro-Pepper takes

Fingerless

i like the guy who wants to create the Psycho-Pass from the hit anime Don't Create The Psycho-Pass

Antipaganda

Gah! Forgot Curtis Lemay! Yeah, Doug liked artillerising everything, Curt liked carpet bombing. And nukes. Similar results, different machines.

Natalie

Haven't listened yet but I literally got a Trump campaign text last night saying "We've crossed the Rubicon"

George Lochinski

According to Google the Poseidon Experience is permanently closed

Clammy_Damp

Trump has changed succession law to ULTIMOGENITURE

myminisinavice

Just make Alex permanent. Enough with the teasing!

Byron Lagrone

counterpoint: Dr Pepper is easily the best soda in existence (especially the variant you can get in glass bottles made with actual sugar) its lesser counterpart Mr Pibb is best from a fountain at 3AM in a closed movie theater

Hot Rod

Can’t believe nobody mentioned building a large wooden badger.

S

Revisionist! 🫵

S

Coke and Pepsi and all the other sodas try to taste like something else. Coca leaf, kola nut, orange, etc.. Dr. Pepper was the first one meant to taste like SODA. The feeling of walking into an old-style soda shop; 23 not-quite-placable flavors alchemically transporting you to another place and time. The platonic ideal of soda

TC

“Why would they come to our concert just to boo us?”

Wario Argento

“Resistance Clapton” Jeff Tiedrich

Zachary Wood

Alex like Vinnie Johnson coming off the bench and just destroying every time

Michael Ouderkirk

Yeah, Purina fired her recently after getting a bunch of "is this your employee?" emails after Gomez went viral with that video of her burning books with a flamethrower

Michael Ouderkirk

Saw a tweet yesterday that said it hasn't been called Mr. Pibb since 2001. Every time I've seen "Pibb Xtra" on the shelf I've assumed it was a temporary promo, a la CoolER Ranch Doritos. It's been more than two decades! Wait, did Cooler Ranch ever go back to Cool Ranch?

Jennifer Wiren

I don't think he's unlocked that tech yet. It seems the USA is going to be quartered up and shared between his children.

Blank

Lmao Felix, “Who was the guy who said, ‘If we don’t move they can’t see us?’”

David Hughes

Will just threw away the line “If you like your republic, you can keep it” - an all-timer!

SkinnyTonySoprano

My dad would only drink Pepsi because they were union

Tan Tan

was that the same guy who did the rap song with ben shapiro? sounds like him

Made of Stardust

As a pepsi drinker, I assure you Dr. Pepper deserves it. I'm 96% certain they are putting battery acid in there. (for legal reasons this is a joke)

Adam Foster

that terrible rapper in the Valentina Gomez video is the spitting image of this politician in the Australian city of Brisbane who’s known for being the biggest leftist politician and organiser in the entire city, absolutely surreal to watch a MAGA version of him lol

Greasy_Jones

Will really tapped into something primal with "flying to pussy mountain"

Steve D

If I remember my Bathroom Reader trivia - Dr. Pepper was named in honor of this Dr. who told the guy who created the soda “don’t marry my daughter she sucks.” He didn’t and he named the soda after him as a thank you.

JP

Song name at the end of the ep, anyone?

Alex Thorne

Glad they finally came around to shitting on Matt taibbi

Michael Ouderkirk

Wait her full name is Valentina Gomez NORIEGA??? [eye emoji]

William

“Hope they don’t JFK him,” said the spiritual descendants of the guys who did, in fact, kill JFK. By god how far we’ve fallen

Christian Johnson

Is it wrong that I think Valentina Gómez is hot 🔥 🥵?

Chris

One reason for Dr Pepper’s popularity might be that Texas has like 10% of the us population

Greasy_Jones

dudes rocking throughout history

Greasy_Jones

J’e suis venu te dire que je m’en vais, just look up "serge gainsbourg tribute kids"

Greasy_Jones

In Atlantic Canada we have a pop brand called Big 8, they have a Pepper-alike called Dr. Smooth. Not just hometown pride when I say it's top tier sodee pop

S

Can you guys figure out what they shoot Biden up with and give a double dose to Matt? I just want one or two more rants before the nukes start flying.

Chris

Of all the Batman actors to choose from, naming the CrossFit Batman as your example of not that big is very funny to me

kron

Another khat mention letsgooooo

Andrew Ratcliffe

I call all soda Coke. I hate that I have to join the KKK now.

Andrew Ratcliffe

Bro those robes are dry clean only I'm not try to deal with that.

Willm

When is Alex joining Chapo? Maybe people will stop asking about Virgil if you have an extra guy

absoluteboi

glad to see the good Dr recovering from that regrettable 'Its not for women' campaign

Agent Grange

You are out of your God damn mind if you like Strawberries and Cream Dr. Pepper. It tastes like Pepto. The can looks like Pepto. It's one of the only sodas I've poured out because I didn't want to finish it. Now the coconut cream one, now THATS an up and comer.

Matthew

Big 8, some Covered Bridge chips, you got er knocked

king_von_diesel

Like the safari club, but for bitching about the libs

Michael

The Islamist Biden administration. Good to know Eric Prince’s politics haven’t changed since the 2000s.

burkina fatso

Felix you are so brave and so correct, Mr Pibb (then pibb xtra) is the superior soda. Thank you for speaking our truth.

Yuronk

I love Alex, I know for sure it’s gonna be a banger when he’s around

drizzly_november

Trump’s eyes welling up as a choir of boys dressed in baggy suits, wearing orange wigs and holding cans of Diet Coke, sing Memory from Cats.

Jesse DeStasio

Ben Affleck is 6'5", absolute unit confirmed

John

i continue to believe that no matter how much he resembles trump barron's biological father is greg ostertag

Wyatt the Wallaby

“Mess with the u.s and we will eat your shit” will live rent free in my head for the rest of my life

Michael

I am shocked we didn’t hear about the Black Rifle Coffee Company guys posting in the chat.

C. Ries

Of course she worked at Purina. Be wary of crazy vet girls

C. Ries

And it harkens back to the glorious age when soda was a medicinal tonic that would ease your palsy, diphtheria, and syphilis symptoms. DOCTOR Pepper.

C. Ries

That’s because everything is flipped upside down in the southern hemisphere

C. Ries

They really are good Nazis, the subconscious corprophagia creeps in at the funniest times

Cas

i categorize my soda by ‘for summer’ or ‘for winter’ and its almost time to go out and buy the ultimate summer soda: squirt

Jonathan Nathan

99% of the time, Felix's veneer of insincerity and multiple layers of irony are impenetrable and indefatigable. The other 1% of the time, he has no choice but to remind you that actually Beta was the superior format and it's still used to this day in professional settings, and VHS only won because of better marketing.

Matthew

Havin a toime, nudding wrang widit meson

chronye

⬇️ mountain dew button

Cool Bird Facts

small white bubba once again riffmogging the main pod boys 👊

Alec

This group chat should be renamed “frociaggine”

Schmechel Means Penis

Dock their pay for not knowing that Valentina Gomez was fired from Purina. A simple Google search would tell you that.

Drew

"eat your shit" was one of Borat's best jokes

Alex Kowalewski

ketchup is for children. Mustard superiority gang!

j c

Lmao I know the Shah’s granddaughter

Grant

I made your mother the ultimate summer soda if you know what i am saying

Jake MacLennan

I was doing deescalation at a Campus protest that Valentina Gomez went to counter protest in St. Louis. Anytime she tried to chant I would just block her face with my hands. She tried to post videos of it after wards but didn’t use any where her face wasn’t visible. A grifter to the nth degree.

Matthew

The gales of laughter at the end are the wind beneath my wings rn

MEAT CLOWN

She's kinda hot but her mouth looks really weird when she talks

MEAT CLOWN

Will's self awareness when roasting Valentina Gomez for saying "lieberry" was great. Even a man who says "nucular" has standards

the Minneapolis Kid

VHS won because of porn, because Beta charged the video producers liceinsing per tape, while vhs charged the licenscing on the players.

Cas

sir, you need to grow up. this is a serious conversation my friends and I are having about our favorite sodas

Foxx Navarro

I am begging yall to learn how to pronounce the name Cuellar please

Jaime Christley

"Extreme Couture" that's not bad actually

Michael

It didn’t happen. What I meant was the sh*t heads behind that company would have been a perfect fit for the chat group.

Ardy Rezv

Matt and Virgil will come back together to recap the 2024 election

Ardy Rezv

Fuck genocide Joe and the democrats and fuck the republicans. We post duopoly in this bitch

kLindberg

Alex is the best courtdwarf Chapo could get

ResilientBastard

I think I went in on the Poseidon Experience at Sea World!

Jimmy McMillan

We have people in their 30s who feel nostalgic for the 1950s. There are people online who like the idea of women churning butter or wish they lived back in the Roman empire. I'm not sure if a lot of young people in Iran feel nostalgic for their former kingdom, but it's possible

Anderson Pooper

You should have Dakota Adams - Stuart Rhodes’ son - on, he is running for state house in Montana as a democratic socialist. That boy has some STORIES.

Michael Xin

Despite all their rhetoric about power, fascists are some of the most pathetic babies if the present ruling class doesn't invite them into power

Breakaway

I think Hiroshima and Nagasaki were two of the very few cities that hadn’t already been incinerated by August of 1945.

Kinetics Video

I'd take the welfare state that we still had in the 50s but I'm guessing that's not what they make TikToks about

Kinetics Video

Porn is just marketing by other means

Doug Cartel

So many things those choads say in that group chat are things where if you responded with "lmao the fuck are you talking about" they would spend the rest of the day scrounging wikipedia trying to be right

Doug Cartel

Ahhh who am I kidding, they would go BUUHHH YOURE A IRAN AGENT and keep rambling about how the B1 bomber could still kick irans ass or something

Ben Hirsch

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Kinetics Video

Thinking of the poor history podcaster that has to wring meaning from this if by some insane sequence of events these guys become geopolitically significant

burgerpocalypse

DON'T PROSECUTE HIGH LEVEL DEMOCRATS FOR THEIR CRIMES!! THAT WOULD MAKE ME VERY UPSET! NOOOOOOoooooooo.....

Jacob

"This Car Drove to the Blurred Top of Pussy Mountain"

Greg

love that Alex is coming down on the right side of cola wars.

Jon

Kind of crazy that Sprite and Diet Coke (both Coke products) sell about as much as Pepsi.

Cumshitter

I’m pretty sure she’s saying “lie-Barry” to appeal to white voters. Not going to pretend I’m a linguist or even a decent Spanish speaker here, but “libreria” is a word in Spanish in means book store. They don’t have a problem putting an R after a B sound. Like “brazo” is arm, there’s no native Spanish speaker language impediment that stops you from making a “bruh” sound.

THEKILLERWHALE

The word "freedom" is has an ever-evolving definition that is grappled over as the winners can claim some part of its generally positive legacy. So the fact that this international fascist guy is talking about the true freedom that he has in fucking Qatar is great to me. They have defined the word down to freedom from any social obligation or duty or interdependence (that you are not ideologically blind to). It is, quite literally, incompatible with any sense of a social contract and is, for lack of a better word, evil. So they can have it.

zeeee - Generation Chill

The English r sound is a very different r sound and can be very difficult to pronounce for non native speakers, notoriously so. Especially in certain consonant clusters and phonetic environments.

Grock1199

When I heard Randy Coutures name i got so happy i was yelling in my car "What the Fuck is he doing in there".

Grock1199

Any possibility for an episode with someone whos an expert on the Myanmar civil war, some great stories there. Like 12 seperate armies lead by like former teachers and poets and one fully self funds itself with a gacha game on the app store

Scoot

Je suis venu te dire que je mon vais

etienne

where Movie Mindslop

jack flowers

get on the war nerd patreon. they have a few good eps about that though none super recently

Gubriel

Matt Taibbi mentioned

Joan LaBarge

my dumb ass read the cover art as necrons like this was gonna be a sudden heel turn to a warhammer Lore podcast

etienne

midway thru my commute. HARDLY ideal

Brian Foley

Alex should become a permanent fixture. He’s great and you guys have good chemistry.

Willm

You just did!

fratthew

I’m with Felix I go outta my way for Pibb the few times I see it out in public it’s got an edge if u ask me

Alex

Can you imagine Eric Prince belives most people are too peasant to vote? Sorry Eric my father didn't start a MLM that has bankrupted millions and I didn't get a chance to start a mercenary organization with that MLM money and his connections to be worthy to vote.

Simon

have to (respectfully) disagree with will, this is exactly what rich nazis have always been like. anything that isn't exactly what they want is the end of civilization to them and they have to invent the most spectacular bullshit to explain why

James Murray

Pepsi >>>>>>>>>>> coke anyday

Mike Mariano

Quaillar, start the reactor. Free Mars.

Quém é

The House of Trump changed demeigne law to utimogeniture, so Baron's in the lead

Dan

Yeah, I got a real Business Plot vibe from this episode.

Dan

Did they? I think that mentioning how reactionary several former Chapo guests have become is like acknowledging the existence of Virgil Texas for Chapo at this point. In fairness to them, however, Matt Taibi was decent when they were talking to him.

Dan

If not for your Anglo name, I would have assumed that you were from Quebec with that take. Some regions and people love Pepsi.

Dan

Burger King > McDonalds/Wendy's

enter_krzysz

Alex talks about the chairman of the Jewish Council (Judenrat) in Łodz, Chaim Rumkowski

Alex Payne

I love and will always love Matt but Alex on the third mic is honestly the next best thing

Jack

any matt updates? love the eps with alex but i miss hearing our big midwestern oaf

Son of Baconator

Miss him so much. I've listening through cushvlogs for weeks to tide me over.

Last Years Man

Anyone who grew up in Texas (myself included) calls all soda Coke. I'd rather call it that then POP

Tyler Silvas

They actually didn't even say anything about him outside of mentioning someone else's comment's about him. I do feel bad for the guy sometimes, Hate Inc is pretty spot on but boy those Twitter files were not bussing.

Jordan Brewer

Did they add Randy Couture to the group chat because they thought he’d assemble a team to take down the deep state?

Aaron Dellutri

Was this episode recorded in 2x time or something?

Mark Schneider

Exactly correct. When I ran a high school library & Seniors had to check out with me, I always had a good laugh at the ones who called it the Lie-bary!! But hey, Grub Hub needs delivery drones. Lie-barry is indeed for the dummies who're proud, "I ain't got & don't need no phony edumacation."

Reece Coren

how much can i pay to get alex on this show weekly

Garrat M

Finally someone stood up to the Pepsi slander from Will. Coke tastes someone cracked open some d volts and poured the acid into a bottle.

Robert Ritchie

On est venu te dire by Les petits chanteurs d’Asnières

Mark

Serge gainsbourg joke took me out

helvetica.hottie

They're like movie villains who have a henchman to do all the dirty work bs they come up with and when they realize how hard the dirty work is and try to do it themselves, they crumble like the dry toast they are.

Dean

Alex so far has been the best replacement 3rd mic since Matt’s absence. If Matt and his family decide to not come back, please consider Alex for a permanent role

Dick Wolf

Murray is a name of Gaelic origin. Please retract the slur and use an irish one.

BlackWolfSkinwalker

"They call all sodas coke" already on the tip of his tongue, legend

Liquidated Damages

My dad and his friend worked at PepsiCo out of college and the friend to this day won’t touch anything besides pepsi

Kinetics Video

My local BK is constantly out of stock on things but they take EBT so I gotta recognize their burger reign

Jon

We love Alex, don’t we folks?

Baby truck

Sad reaccs only but very true. Wish Alex would vibe out on history stuff too. That’s what I most miss about Matt

Chad Dopamine

+1 for Alex on 3rd mic, he's been consistently great comedic instincts to riff with will and felix