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We review the various freaks, toadies, goons, and TV personalities that Trump has tapped to build his second cabinet, and speculate how much damage Vivek & Elon can actually do with their kids-table DOGE advisory board. We also discuss the coalescing view among the pundit class that the Democrats need to abandon their various activist groups, as espoused in today’s reading series by Adam Jentleson. Finally, a new (hopefully semi-regular) feature from Matt.

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Comments

Felix lloyd

First from Australia lol

Sam

Gay

Joe

Cabinet of Bi-Curiosities

Sam

😭

Goonba

I’m gooning rn life so good man gooning on one hand chapo on other Fr life is good you know what I mean

Kompy

Alex guest ep AND new Matt feature??? Yeah im thinkin the slop is gourmet tonight fellas 😎

Goonba

Transcendental goon rn Matt back all goon no edge 💯

Goonba

Merry goonmas !

Declan Kennedy

jumping to the end first, sorry non-Matt dry boys

Gooch Immane

FOR MATT-HEADS: Will begins the intro for Beatnik Matt at 1:09:15

Horseloverfat

Biden is doing fitzcarraldo but he’s gonna build a segregated bowling alley out there

Sam

Don’t want to be all Reddit but it’s really epic to hear Matt again

Sam

Sam

Fish Priest

What a dope poem. I will 1000% be buying a hard copy of Matt's book of poetry when it's published.

chee rabbits

i love our new allen ginsberg matt christman. thank you amber rollo.

chee rabbits

"because i prefer an honest criminal to a lying cop"

Purple Lemons

Not washing his hands to keep his crusade lore accurate and die of disease

Casey S

He'll ya Matt!

Uso Dayo

Alex was disturbing.

Whucko Jaang

I relistened to the final cushvlog again last night. Love that terrible truth.

Victor in Brooklyn

“Pome”? “Rather” interesting way to pronounce that.

Natalie

It's 6am for me rn lol

Tim O'

The true ghoulvie screamset is Trump's cabinet 🤓🤓

Uso Dayo

I was half asleep listening to this episode, but did Alex really say Kamala was too stupid to find a real husband and even her dad didn’t like her and he’s Jamaican? I mean wtf? That’s straight JD Vance humor

George Mitri

Matt’s missive is absolute fire. So so glad to hear his voice. 😌. Great ep, guys.

Joel.

It may be years away but he will come back and share his live thoughts again. I will be there boyyyy

Travis

Felix begins speaking at 1 minute and 26 seconds

Agent Grange

Maybe this is just cope on my part but I sincerely don't see Elon surviving the first three months of the Trump presidency once it actually gets up and running. They're going to have some sort of fall out where Elon ends up crying because Trump skipped some briefing on intervention into Peru for their lithiums mines because he wanted to go golfing.

Savannakhet

"Supply-side progressivism" reminds me of Frank Card's signature policy of "Trickle-down diplomacy"

Agent Grange

They're going to have to a sequel to the They Them Zendaya episode after this one to balance out their karma with the ladies after talking about slugs in vaginas. That was some repugnant Scorch Atlas shit.

king_von_diesel

To be fair, I do think she give Chill dawg a real run for her money in terms of "sheer negative retail political instincts."

Matty yglesias

5 minutes in and will references TWO MOVIES, inside kid

Ligma

And I think she had a falling out with her father over her associating Jamacian culture with marijuana . If I'm not mistaken

Uso Dayo

If the Democrats want to win they should imagine that the Republicans are leftest extremists because they are actually very good at beating anybody left of center

TC

The Return, when we need him most.

William

It’ll be stupider than that

Agent Grange

"Even a Clockwork Orange is right twice a day" deeply altered my brain in a way I can't describe.

Jabroni Ludd

“Replace Dem party idpol with what?” more gawdamn Neoliberalism of course

HeyB00B00

I'd give anything to hear "it's me Matt and Felix"

Erin Kristina

Matt Gaetz's father made his wealth by owning a chain of nursing homes in Fla. So, he knew about removing the deceased.

Miles_B

Alex kills me every time. Loved Matt's segment. Great episode.

MonsoonMoon

8:36 Butts and poop mentioned.

John Harwood

Go Christman go!!! Never stop that flow

Matthew

Amber F is going to have to recant her position that all the good poems have been written already, Matt is out here killing it 👑👑👑

Chris

Yeah it’ll be because Musk keeps calling Ivanka breedable or posts a selfie next to Trump sleeping during a joint chiefs meeting

Doug Cartel

It's going to be even funnier when Russia starts exporting that trillion dollar lithium pile in the Donbass region to China and Elon is still begging for restrictions on EV imports

Yacobum

New Most unsettling riff unlocked

J Lit

All the MGP stuff about how she's a political genius is hilarious bc she has only ever won against that crazy Joe Kent Nazi Washington Republicans keep nominating

Doug Cartel

"Deus Vult" is so fucking ham fisted and clumsy compared to "inshallah", Christians really need to stop

J Lit

Her, Reddit man, and Josh Shapiro all get called generational talents for winning layup elections against the most repulsive and electorally self-sabotaging freaks Republican primary voters can come up with

Richard Cochnar

Donald Trump has broken his foot after he fell chasing Elon and trying to pull his tail.

William

The people who voted for Trump who think food prices are going to drop dramatically are the same people who thought he was buying them lunch when he said, “Food for everyone!”

Will

“I need a freak” is real bottom line of our times

William

Crazy how dems just see republicans and say, “well, they just won, we need to be more like them”

Mitcheaux

Has an estimate of when the book is shipping been posted? Hearing the bit of Matt made me want to read the book even more

William

Republicans have claimed every presidential opponent since fucking Truman was a socialist. The dems only chance is if JB pritzker is as big of a perceived class traitor (savior, really) as FDR was. They’re not out of the game by a long shot though, they do have some democrat governors that look a lot better than whatever the post Trump people look like

Isaac

That joke Alex made about Biden’s dog commander getting turned into horse food was a 10/10 sleeper. No one seemed to catch it but I’m imagining Chris laughing his ass off when he went back to edit the episode.

William

This Matt poem needs to have Tibetan singing bowls. And call them Cush drops

Hayden Nicholls

Matt has unlocked some Mark E Smith vibes there.

Dyyyyylan

Straight JD Vance? He’d probably be less powerful…

Michelle

Can we get a bonus ep of Alex and Felix riffing on RFK2?

Last Years Man

felix sounds lIke he's locked in a bathroom lol

Ligma

I decided to join the 4b movement after hearing that

Last Years Man

was that J6 song written by Angelo Badalamenti?

Sam McManus

Alex was joking about Deus Vult in Hebrew, but from the NY Post: "Later on, while working on a series for Fox, Hegseth accessorized the cross and sword with some Hebrew lettering spelling out the word “Yahweh,” he explained." "Hegseth said the word meant “Jesus in Hebrew,” but official sources actually translate the phrase as “I am” or “He will be,” which is the name of God in the Old Testament."

Quadabyte

Matt is like the cloth covered monkey surrogate, he may not be able to provide us with nourishment anymore, but we still come to him for comfort.

Peri

Rep. MGP fucking sucks donkey dick for the pro-finger amputation bill. Speaking as a woodworker who’s had the enormous displeasure of being witness to a table saw accident. What a great treat it is to hear Matt tho! <3

plainwrap

Chris really went to him and said, "Get in the Eva, Matt."

Derwood

Biden really could be the one to find El Dorado because maybe the route to get there is like the Zone on the way to the room in Stalker. It can only be navigated in a nonsensical way that a dementia addled mind could perform remarkably well

d.a.walker

Always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom

T

THANK YOU, MATT I'M SO HAPPY

Emily Richardson

Alex is a top tier guest host. Matt’s poetry is so great. Love this segment idea, can’t wait to hear his voice more again soon!

K H

The main thing Joe Biden did for unions I remember is putting his thumb down to stop the railworkers union. It was probably a defining moment that set labor back 10 years when all he needed to do was get out of the way. It also revealed basically every single Democrat in office including AOC as spineless sycophants that would backstab their orignal supporters at critical junctures.

low_art

Matt's still got it. Glad to hear him back.

K H

Instead of whining he starts speaking in dooge.

Ozzie

God bless Matt

Me

Matt is verse maxing. He’s in his Byron era.

Cullen S

I got Hand Foot Mouth from my daughter and it’s been fucking miserable. Haven’t been comfortable in my own body for almost a week. Matt’s Missive brought me that healing aura

Drew

This made me quite happy, Thank you Matt.

Michael L

Can someone please tell me what that picture is on the title page? Weird AF but also hilarious. Is that Michael Jackson and a Truman Capote-Bela Lugosi mashup?

Michael

“Before the bombs start falling on New York and DC.” Not going to lie people on the left screaming about how World War III is right around the corner every time there’s the slightest escalation in that war are just as annoying to me as Liberals who were screaming non stop about the “end of American democracy.”

king_von_diesel

"Because they said "come and see," but there was nothing on" stopped me dead in my tracks.

Clarp Blarpkiss

11:55 Alex implying that we just feed dogs and horses back and forth to each other genuinely has me breathless.

A RHINO

Great to hear from Matt.. Wish him all the best, what a gem

Last Years Man

Matt's poems are fucking awesome. more.

nick

I assume the table saw thing was about saw stop? While it would be expensive, that thing is basically like the invention of the seatbelt. A table saw isn’t an everyday item anyway, and they are expensive already. Do the regulation and save our precious fingers!

Noah Mickens

Will! Stop interrupting the funny guys! Everybody tunes in to hear them joke around, not to hear you read from the newspaper.

Ed Scherrer

And so Matt returns as Virgil

BizarreManatees

That is a still from "The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari" a german silent film from the 1920s which is like, one of the first "horror" movies ever made (though that didn't become "codified" as a genre until the 1930s) Its got a really interesting look and feel for such an early film, if you're into like, film history I'd recommend checking it out

Drew

I would love it if we got a monthly reading list of any novels, poems, short stories, articles etc that Matt has been diving into. I just want to try to make my brain as big as Matt’s.

Aaaaaaaaaaa

“Because sea peoples is just another word for beautiful boaters, because ba da ba ba ba I’m loving it” 🔥🔥🔥 Matt Christman. XXL Freshman 2025

TugNuggins

Vivek was born in Cincinnati, Ohio.

MG

Hearing Matt always brings a tear to my eye. Brilliant as always

kmd

I didn't realize how much I needed to hear Matt's voice, he has been sorely missed

Zach H.

If Matt just swoops in as the Chapo Andy Rooney now and again, I would be very happy.

T

Wrong. I'm mainly annoyed when people interrupt Will.

T

Can a stroke make someone's brain improve? Matt's always had the best metaphors, mostly in the form of jokes, but this is on another level. I couldn't have expected poetry this good right out of the gate. He's our Amanda Gorman.

T

Jack Handey Rooney

Bur Nur

Please, more strokes of genius

Degrassi Knoll

Ummmmm actually, it's 10:55 : - ) he's an all star guest fo sho. 13:55 about Vivek lol

Savannakhet

Matt using the Chapo money to a build a warship before dieing in a naval battle against the Turks.

TubiRocks

"Bob Dylan has been doing heroin for, like, 90 years" is exaclty what you hear hanging out with MMA fans too long

Reece Coren

senator mullen please stop making us watch gay porn on the floor of the house (stav cracking up)

Laura

"Because Sea Peoples is just another word for beautiful boaters." I'm gonna have to sit with that one for a while.

bobby

“come and see but there’s is nothing on, so our rerun will do” is actually such heat it’s unreal

Me

That tracks for Matt. With Felix as his Keats, “Here lies one whose name was writ in soda.”

Sam

Yeah I don't really get the whole left hatred of helping Ukraine. I guess a lot of lefty people see American interventionism as worse than another country's imperialism, which I would get except for the fact it's Russia, and they're basically just a dumber, more right-wing version of the US.

ResilientBastard

Can confirm our kid gets fresh peeled fruit at our daycare.

Dr. TJ Eckelberg

Matt continues to be the person who can best distill the Trump era in digestible but beautiful terms. Thrilled about the new segment

TLT

<3 the matt poem segment wonderful, was lovely at the show

William Hubel

That reading series was a new low of bird brain

A Kalman

Strokes of Genius!

NYCM&AHole

Lol I take it Matt coined the name “strokes of genius”, yes?

Pædiekeix

They do be lusting for Vienna tho

Bill Vog

I'd rather have a criminal than a crooked cop. Was a banger line. (if I have it correct)

pizzapope

Isn’t supply side “progressivism” just bill clinton ?

Vincent W Troia

in this instance i would definitely choose the crooked cop over the criminal

T

It'll be ironic if his daughter ends up like a modern day Ada Lovelace, laying the foundation for some new technohell.

protob1

That is because you are gay

vimproved

Matt 😤😤😤

Michael NWI

Gary IN as Ukraine fits very well. As a lifelong resident of Northwest Indiana it fits on multiple levels. Gary is the Donbas, an industrial wasteland while everything south of US 30 is a corrupt breadbasket full of inbred twits. Indiana is Ukraine for sure.

Cam C

Idk why, but every time they get Alex and Felix together they tend to bring up “guys they knew in high school.” It’s so boring, aren’t you almost 40?

Peen Israel

Awesome, awesome episode. Love the ending, love Matt.

Hugo

Matt appreciators meet here 😤

Sean Culottes

Ripe* twice a day is what I heard.

danny

it’s actually crazy how much of a genius Matt is

K U

Great poem actually.

Michael

I am all for raising concerns about escalation of the conflict and as well pushing for a diplomatic solution given that the war is probably a stalemate at this point. My problem is the people who have been for what feels like forever now been saying ‘the end is upon us’ at the slightest escalation. (Many of these people were also saying there was no chance Russia would invade too). When it comes to why so many people on the “left” are so hostile to supporting Ukraine for a number of them especially the “Marxist Leninists” they just are basically anti American. Their just doing contrarianism which they think makes them anti imperialist.

David Exelby

So happy to hear Matt’s voice.

dan

gay

Ascetic Blur

I have Adored every episode with Alex. He crackse the fick up.

Cam C

I guess the high schoolers listening like it

Jon Rehm

Why do they call it taking a dump? You’re not taking it anywhere. They should call it leaving a dump.

Jon Rehm

If you’re old enough to know Andy Rooney, you’re old enough to remember when Beavis did that bit.

Christian Aspen

Matt’s poem was amazing. So great to hear him again

TugNuggins

"I can see the future and it is murder" - Matt christmas.

CT

The Bob Dylan/Heroin thing is a pretty open secret within the music industry.

Matt

The dismissal they all had of Health and Human Services is baffling to me. It's over the FDA and the CDC, they're putting the anti-vaxxer in charge of all the vaccines and public health. In terms of death toll of all the cabinet picks, that dept has the highest potential. I get that they like doing the dumb guy schtick, but that was egregious, was it just so irony pilled it went over my head?

12345

Supply side progressivism aka deregulation something something black lives matter corporate social responsibility

eduard karpoev

Perez ran against a literal ex-Green Beret white supremacist like its less her doing great, & the Republican party more shooting themselves in the foot as they keep running Joe Kent. This whole BS on openly saying you want to be the diet-Republicans is downstream the fact all these "Economically Conservative, Socially Liberal" assholes became Democrats after 2016 like this shit only works in generating above average midterms but eating shit every general election since these aren't real people who massively shift the amount of people voting, but they dilute the Dems to be milktoast as fuck and do nothing except BS like "AUKUS & Sweden is in NATO now"

Migz

We love Matt

Moonwatcher13

hell yeah, loving the new end segment, and good to hear from Matt again. Glad he seems to be doing well.

Shane-A112

matt the recovery goat.

nick

Followed 2 months later by a catastrophic railway derailment and environmental disaster caused by some of the same concerns workers wanted to strike over, in a battleground state, that Biden slept on and Trump capitalized on. Well done Joe!

Stephen

Election Post-Mortems are reading like: What if we use more triangulation to better triangulate our failing triangulated positions

Arthur G. Pym

Indeed he admitted to using heroin in the early 60s and being very "strung out" on it in an interview with biographer Robert Shelton

CT

I’ve worked a good number of his concerts over the course of 20 some odd years, he’s an abject weirdo no matter what. You’re not allowed to to look at him, let alone say anything to him AT ALL. You’re told to look the other way when and if you see him. None of that is heroin related, but… certainly adds to the lengthy list of character traits that make him out to be a grade a weirdo

cashedtrapezoid

I’m using my table saw while listening to this. Thanks for the jinx

Jerry Cornelius

Trust me, talking about people you knew in high school is more interesting and fun at 40 than it was at 25. I can’t wait until I’m 70. I won’t even need a conversational partner, I’ll just mutter to myself about the FFA guy who bragged he’d developed a pestilence-resistant wheat strain that ended up being a pot plant grown in a loaf of Nature’s Own multi-grain bread.

Kozz-

Elon the Uncubus

Wyatt the Wallaby

That animal biederman I cant even say his name, killed my 24 year old kid sister

Isaac

Headline from like thirty minutes ago: “Ukraine fired several American-supplied longer-range missiles into Russia, officials said Tuesday, marking the first time Kyiv used the weapons that way in 1,000 days of war.” Way to fucking jinx it boys.

Isaac

I think a lot of people are assuming that the Trump cabinet/appointees will be so incompetent they won’t be able to get their shitty plans through. Personally I’m on the fence, but I could see Kennedy lasting like three months and then getting the boot. Don’t forget what the turnover rate was like for Trump Presidency 1.0

Man2quilla

I was eating lunch, lmao

Isaac

I enjoy it.

Desmond Brown

Love you, Matt. Hoping everything is going well.

Arthur G. Pym

As a big time Dylan-head I love this story

Joseph

Is there a good book on how the crusades set up the mechanisms of slavery? Besides the Verge.

K H

I totally forgot the effect so swiftly proceeded the cause. We are nearing the singularity.

Peter Hager

The Jan 6ths song is that haunting song you see on the Retro Future TV, in the shot a pristine Oval Office that then pans back and shows the carnage of WWIII on DC with a Mr.Handy trying and failing to keep the remains of White House Clean.

Nissan Al Gaib

Amazing to hear from Matt! Cheers to a smooth safe recovery!

K H

Stakeholders!

K H

They will probably have next to no success in doing anything but collapsing any part of government providing a tangible service. FDA will probably be more lax in enforcing bogus claims from Brainforce pill distributors. The most damaging and immediate policy will probably be related to immigration.

K H

Being rich and famous for a long time makes you autistic/retarded.

K H

Quoting Leonard Cohen's The Future along with Everybody Knows.

Alyssa

Matt. Great episode.

Peter Hager

*snaps* Beat man, the beat.

Jacob Dysart

Matt really elevates the show. Levels it up from a snarkfest (not that a snarkfest can’t be fun)

LOAF

Okay you gotta cut the new segment I can't start getting teary-eyed at the end of every ep.

Michael L

Oh my god, I actually saw that film in a film class about thirty years ago! Metropolis and Alexander Nevsky were both in it too. Thanks for the reminder!

Grant Spalding

Maybe people are afraid of the nuclear missiles that Russia has.

K H

Vincent...they are eating the cats and dogs in there.

Tina Paracord

The J6 Choir really shows the limitations of Choral programs with no gay people. Sure ain't no Elvira.

K H

We need to identify whoever it was.

K H

Do you use the table saws?

K H

There were so many in this one.

NYCM&AHole

I assume it was Matt being very tongue in cheek.

K H

She is definitely annoying. Almost as much as RFK.

K H

He was born in Morrowind actually.

K H

Big Juggs Monthly (month) Issue

K H

Insane. He is literally reading the words of upward failing cranks.

K H

It has been around for 10 years at this point. Doubt it adds much cost really, especially if they ALL have it.

Brian

❤️

K H

Well...the escalation in Ukraine is basically just the US escalating directly against Russia on its own border. How did people feel about the whole Russia in Cuba thing? Where was that going? 2 nuclear powers squaring up has not really gotten this close to happening. If Russia arms Mexican cartels with long range missiles how would that be received? The issue with interventionism has been addressed by Noam Chompsky. Basically you just need to understand that our interventions are not to help anyone. It is to bleed our opposition in a drawn out war and create a puppet in the aftermath following expulsion. Would Ukraine be better off under a European version of Taliban which we can already see is just nazis? There is a lot of wishful thinking by people wanting to believe America can be the good guy. It's not. It literally happened only twice. Once fighting ourselves, and the second time resulted in us dropping 2 nukes.

Seb

I love the Matt poems - they bear his singular insight, wit, and humor and the medium of poetry distills everything beautifully. Very much looking forward to more.

interzoa

"so what are you waiting for? get in there." Great work from Matt

Mikey Vital

Didn't expect the "I Need a Freak" needle drop lmao

K H

He been drinkin milkshakes.

james

You guys gotta get up with Issac at coexist inc. he knew that chick from Washington state back in the day. He says she crashed on his couch for a semester.

Ranni

Matt ❤️

K H

Did Corey Booker wipe out before? I can't remember.

Ranni

Such great comedic timing

Michael

Russian interventions aren’t good either. Also you loose all credibility when you label the entire Ukrainian state as being a Nazi state. Very simplistic view of a diverse society/country.

K H

Confirmed real or riff?

Michael

Fair enough. But Israel also has nuclear weapons and could use them. So following the logic of a lot of the “ anti imperialist” left shouldn’t Hamas and Hezbollah stop antagonizing Israel to save the world from nuclear war?

Last Years Man

its sort of like it broke down some walls. hes less structured but at the same time, everything is connected

K H

Typical Democrat garbage. I think it may literally be more viable to run as a communist Republican. I'm not joking.

Stephen

Literally my favorite politics game is masquerading economically left talking points to my Republican family members and then calling them comrades afterwards 🤣🤣🤣

K H

What happened to Musk with regards to Xi? Seemed like they were cool, now not so much.

Barry Nixon

This poem is so powerful thank you Matt we miss you

Whistle Dog

They said it would never happen but the boy is back 🥲❤️

Magic

Will with the Verbal Flashbang. Stroke of Genuis

Whistle Dog

Only the ones that are in there

The Squash

Strokes of genius made me laugh real herd

Oliver Elliott

If you actually give a shit about the Ukrainian people, you could see that they should have done a deal from a position of strength back near the beginning. Instead, the U.S. et al. told Ukraine not to deal with not purpose other than to kill Russians. NATO/US ghouls care NOTHING for Ukraine or Ukrainians.

Michael

The problem I have with this is it paints Ukraine as having no agency. I think it’s clear there’s a large portion of the country that was not prepared to make a deal and prepared to fight. I don’t view Ukraine as a complete US vassal state.

Equality State Of Mind

Yell about blood libel long enough, eventually there's a pogrom. Felix is right. Also, sorry, Felix, for the metaphor.

Declan Hertel

brief mention of Eastern Orthodoxy got me missing the good old days with Rod Dreher…

Gooch Immane

No anthropologist on earth has their insight on Types Of Guys. High school is a supermutagen petri dish for specific Types Of Guys. Sometimes they stay that way and end up on ChapoFYM. There's like five thousand unique subspecies of Hot Couch Guy.

Benjamin O Levine

Strokes of genius segment, we love it dont we folks

Studio Novaya by Fredrick Edward

It is so good to hear Matt’s voice! He has always been the brains of this operation. The poems really do hit.

Tam Mansilver

Thank you for putting words to our time Matt. Glad to have you back

Rxk Lenderman

Lock in Alex as the third mic and then commit to a weekly Matt segment and Chapo will enter a second golden age

Anya

Matt ❤️

Matt Larrabee

Loved both of Matt’s poems. I don’t like poetry except for Bukowski and Matt’s got a similar mix of humor, sadness, simple prose, and insight. Looking forward to more.

Tim O'

Matt as poet-witness to history feels cosmically correct.

Alexander Johnson

I'm happy to hear from Matt, but I'm more happy to know that he's clearly been reading John Ashbery (RIP).

Bill

Jesus Christ Gaetz is like a V for Vendetta villian

Ana

FYI the reason Harris put the whole "I support trans prisoners having access to medical care" thing in that survey from the 2020 primaries is because Kamala had previously chosen to go to court as AG of California to deny an incarcerated trans woman healthcare, and continues to defend that ridiculous decision to this day. (Kamala lost that appeal, btw.) So it was literally just an attempt at idiotic gaslighting on her part, typical "actually I support these things I have in reality actively sought to destroy." Especially since this and the many, many other cases of her being an utterly disgusting, detestable human being who seems to go out of her way to pick on the weak and vulnerable (her "joyful" cackling over locking up the impoverished single mother of a girl with sickle cell anemia who missed too much school from being in the hospital, anyone?) actually did come up in 2020, unlike this time. Dems basically ran their own version of Ron Desantis this election.

Hick Rhodes

“Matt Mogs Gorman” shoulda been the title.

sappho.io

THEYRE EATING THE DOGS THAT ARE IN THERE

etienne

the banana lady is microtargeted at Slate Star Codex-type freaks like me who get off on industrial policy and railroads, it's so nice to finally have someone reaching out to me

etienne

along with say folks like my friends who effectuated the Rural Exodus and are doing small scale farming and agro processing and are in a war of attrition with the FDA

Damen Irving

So instead of doing politics, democrats’ solution is to do less of it

Alberto Suarez

i opened youtube to find the closing song and started to type "more skrokes" lol

Jonathan G

Give me head if I’m wrong, but didn’t chapo interview glusenkamp perez at some point?

Sean

Alex absolutely killed it at 52:40 god damn

Man2quilla

Goated segment title

Matt Breen

Alex episodes are low key the funniest ones

jay alan

Matt poems for the win. ❤️

K H

Man. You are really working hard to misunderstand shit, and you should introspect why that is. Unless you're a cunt that thinks all of Afghanistan is Taliban or really fucking stupid and doesn't realize the US supported religious extremists because they were the most zealous opponents of Russia's invasion in Afghanistan. The issue isn't that Russia invading Ukraine is "good." It's that US intervention makes it worse, including actively derailing a negotiated peace deal. The process of making it worse and dragging it out is going to put us in confrontation with Russia when we both have nukes...which is bad. Your comment about Israel causing a nuclear war by nuking Gaza or Lebanon honestly makes me think you're just retarded. Ukraine should get exactly what Hamas has gotten from the US.

Schaeffer Mallory

We all know it, Matt's stroke flow is uncanny and impeccable

K H

You could run on family values through strong parental leave and childcare and and quote Jesus. Trump got in there and they hated him, but they kept hating each other too. Democrats are emotionless drones.

Michael

Triggered much? The fact that you’re so quick with the insults doesn’t say much about your intelligence. Comparing Afghanistan to Ukraine is apples to oranges and shows your whole outlook is just “AmeRica BaD.’ Were you spamming Ron Paul for president in YouTube comments in 2008? Because that would explain a lot. Now go f*ck your w$ore of a mother.

Finn

My boy Matt is back!!!

KimM

I can do without Alex's incessant corny jokes.

Zakir KH

Alex is so fuckin funny man, God damn. "Which country is Gary Indiana"

Josh

Hell nah. He is passable at best but to me he just sounds like an elite tier Chapo listener - nothing of the weirdness, novelty, or originality of the original dry boys

No Relation to Henry

I know some Dayton area Hindus who went to the same temple he used to attend.

Teresa Patrick

Loved Matt's poem, and the whole hilarious episode as usual!

Chapo Bath House

Genuinely didn't see the argument coming that Kamala was the victim of cancel culture

Alex Weber

We love our Matt don’t we folks?

NitroDickclapp III

Oh man it's so good to hear matt's voice again! I miss that big sweet man

Dawson

My boy returns

seasound

something for the touts, the nuns, and [joke]

brendan

glucentcamp-perez sounds like a real post ww2 argentian name

Benny G

DOGE is a glorified suggestion box

Bruise Willis

love hearing someone (not will) rail a line after they stop talking

Bruise Willis

yup. Its like a simpson writer raised on the simpsons instead of a variety of weirdo shit.

Jessica Rios

Thank you for the poem Matt. It was awesome and we love you.

Chubby Justin

I can't wait to NEW RULES on Chapo Trap House!

Elder

🤣

Tvvvv

We need scoring for the Matt poetry and the poems should open the show. Our Values Are Under Attack!

Tvvvv

My feelings on the new poem: Dilly Dilly

Kerri

Yessssssss Matt

K H

Apples to oranges? What does fruit have to do with geopolitical conflict? Go back to selling grain. How do you racist dipshits even end up on the patreon? Does Ukraine buy subscriptions for you azov morons? You were happy to compare Gaza to Ukraine 1 post earlier. Again, let Ukrainian fighters have exactly as much help as Hamas. I was actually nice to you until you made it clear you're disingenuous or profoundly stupid. Nothing respectable about idiocy and if you don't like being insulted keep your yap shut bozo.

Waddle Mi

It's so nice to hear Matt again, thank you guys. I'm glad he's doing well.

Jon

Got a recommendation?

Hugh

“Waterboarding with liberal tears”

Alex Gullen

Felix should do the right thing and quit public speaking until he’s sorted out the ‘like’ speech tick.

Sean

We love you parasocially Matt. It really is great to hear your voice.

Philip Wailes

“Sea peoples is just another word for beautiful boaters” put me the fuck out…

Dara Higgins

Amazing Matt. Some Leonard Cohen references I'm there too!

Antipaganda

Speaking as a non-American, why did the white supremacist soldier not get in?

Antipaganda

We don't usually hear stuff he's had a chance to work on and error-correct. Writing stuff out is easier to get right. I wouldn't go try and get a stroke to gain metaphor powers. 😄

Antipaganda

Epic dolphin bacon that licks the llama's ass.

Fernslinger

Damn! The Batman vs Superman of strange women really got me!!

Fernslinger

Huge love to to Matt and family! Our lovely lad is dropping bars!

eduard karpoev

He lost to MGP in very close races 2 times now.

rbkhe

Rachel Levine is not HHS secretary lol

geoff renison

I heard "they said 'come and see' but there was nothing new, so we watched repeats". I know this is inaccurate, but it's how i'm going to remember it, and more of this sort of thing please.

Krister Schuchardt

So happy to hear Matt's voice again. The poem was wonderful, breaking through to the real like before, just in another form.

Jimmy McMillan

Voting for democrats isn't harm reduction, it's harm inflation reduction. They never make anything better but they make stuff worse a little bit slower

Cam C

I wish they were talking about the guys y’all knew in HS

Michael

“You disagree with me so you’re a racist.” Right out of the American Liberal playbook good work. Also Gaza and Ukraine are in similar situations. Both groups of people are resisting hostile forces. Obviously one group is getting western support while another is not but from where I sit they are in a similar boat. You’re not nearly as brilliant as you think with your simplistic “aMeRica baD” analysis. Read something other than the Grayzone.

HawkandQuail

Does anyone know if they have to pay Sesame Street a licensing fee to use Kermit’s voice?

Robert Aitken

he’ll never find any success at this rate

Zack Frailey

Can we get the text of Matt’s poem? It’s amazing

Gucci Brandt

Alex is the wittiest guest. I still really want Matt back but Alex always delivers banger eps.

Jack

we loooooove it

Randy Long

Great to hear Matt’s voice

Whistle Dog

Those four years were a blur… literally! 🌪️

Max Brady

“Because they say come and see but nothing is on so a rerun will do” Damn

yap_that_fool

Ik it’s fuck the fans and all but can you send my merch it’s been a month and a half

SadSnack🥔

Tip of the cap to fellow Deckerheads.

SadSnack🥔

Alex eps always get me to click like.

SadSnack🥔

Anticipay ay shun…is making me hate

Mitch H.

Chris can we get a text version of Matt's Poem? The recital is very good I'd just like to go over it again more thoroughly.

Alex

Bob Dylan has never been seen in a t-shirt

Jacob Bucci

Matt is clearly our hybrid cylon

Tim O'

If you put on a hazmat suit, you can probably find it on the Chapo subreddit

The Adventures of Mac

Matt's poem is nothing short of the highest caliber of literature.

WizLizGiz

Damn that poem, after a stroke? Hats off sir

JP

Alex would have been *perfect* for the Chapo Call of Cthulhu days. The no handwashing bit harkened back to when Felix turned down washing hands at the DNC, citing his “natural oils”.

Bert

True strokes of genius!

Harry

hearing Matt again was a joy

grymm

MATT

Maicol

Loved Matt’s strokes

Toby

Happy to hear Matt again, thank you.

Watermane

bought some shirts on oct. 1st Lol. Guess I'll wait

Reece Coren

so good to hear Matt’s voice!!! nothing but love to the Christman-Rollo family 💗 thank you for everything you’ve done for us this past year Amber!!!!

PJ Martinez

OMG that ending was incredible! Please so much more of this! Gave me the same chills Matt used to with his rants!

AEC

Cristman—Ginsberg x Ramdas

AEC

lol wtf! Felix just said the Ginsberg thing! That’s a joke right? He didn’t do “all that stuff” right? lol okay yeah that sounds like a funny joke about art/artists. (I just listened to his Kaddish yesterday!) and Christman REALLY sounds/writes/feels/speaks poetry like Alan Ginsberg. Not like a copy or a rip off. AS GOOD. and in his own right and ALL THAT (stuff that he did 😜)

Noodles

Matt's voice put a huge smile on my face. Loving the Alex appearances he is very funny!

Cooper Kahoe

Has anyone transcribed a copy of Matt’s poem or have a written version they can share?

Kamran Husain

felix i think that quote tweet assault got me into the show

Tom

Because they are eating the dogs, they are eating the cats that are in there. Cushbomb forever.

Chris

I used to live in Marie's district. It's almost entirely dumb suburbanites.

Noctor

RFK is taking Vyleesi? I thought that was only for female hyperactive sexual desire disorder. Kind of strange for him to be taking a MSH receptor agonist when kind of famously John had Addison’s disease which caused him to appear Chito colored. Just not the spray on Chito color.

Cami

The auto erotic sex game bit made me just sure the straights need to stay out of gay sex, they don't even know what poppers are.

lake

Can we get a pdf of that poem

lake

Matt is a genuinely brilliant poet. Stroke has taken away not an ounce of his once in a generation intellect.

T

Ginsberg really did do all that stuff... He was an open pdf file

John

Alex and UTI talk nearly made me piss myself

dice

i miss matt so much it was nice to hear him again

AbeLinkin

Well done, Matthew

J

Making things worse more slowly is harm reduction. The real issue imo is the fact that libs are so pop-psychology pilled that they’re trying to apply public health frameworks to political issues

Nick Muscatiello

Poetry is for homos. Good thing I’m fucken gay

Ruby Lee

hearing matt made me grin and tear up a bit. <3

Samir Knox

Matt’s poem made me cry

Lilbean

Love the LC callbacks, deeply felt poem reminds me of Peter dale Scott

Paul

So good to hear from Matt again - hope he's doing well!

Metra Eccentric

I like Matt's poem a lot. I'm not going to exalt it to genius status, but it was very.. satisfying. He's making a real point with a real point of view. And if he stole from Leonard Cohen and McDonalds then he stole from the best. But the two wholly original stanzas that stuck with me were: 'Because I don't trust your embrace. Because I'd rather sing YMCA so I can see where your hands are.'

Jon

Alex doesn’t bring anything of substance. All he does is riff. The Chapos need another perspective not another Felix

Fiddypea

Great to hear from Matt again. Wishing him and his family all the best ❤️

James Wallace

That dry sense of humor is honed to an atoms width.

Natalie

does anyone know what article they were reading from talking about the Matt gaetz asphyxiation scenario? I just want a screenshot of the text but searching "cocaine and semen residue" unfortunately yielded no results

Natalie

i cant wait for his book to be delivered 😳😳😳

Dan

So great to hear Matt again!

Matt Colston

I literally am weeping listening to Matt's poetry.

Steven-O

This episode is not in the RSS feed.

burkina fatso

matt popped off when he said “waiting in line is for homosexuals”

Dick Must Bust

Awesome to hear from Matt, loved the poem! ❤️

Malaparte_Animal

Putting my queer shoulder to the wheel, America

Vex

Hearing Matt’s voice was wonderful thank you.

Amos Happ

Snaps for Christman!!!!!!!!!!

Sean Whitney

So cool to hear Matt, thanks, boys!

Major Powers

I was the 666th Patreon like for Matt's return.

lizzabees

love you all, chapo house trappers, but hearing from matt again made my day. i think there was a poet in there all along, and if there’s any silver lining to the stroke, it will be him finding ways to convey his ideas in that sparser medium

Fiddypea

Our big beautiful boy is back for good

Beehive Fucker

Matt Christman? more like Matt Christmas!!! because it's like, a gift that he's back on the pod idk man, leave me alone

NovalisGuy

Matt put the biggest smile on my face.

Nolan

No Friday episode? Butt thugs have been dispatched.

T

And he's so quick without using any tricks

Kirk mortemore

Great to hear Matt's voice again. Made me a little teary. I'm looking forward to more poetry.

Rusty’s Mum

Matt ❤️ can we get transcripts for his poetry?

Cooper Kahoe

Here you go. My best attempt at transcription. Here There Is No Why: A Dialogue “How could you let this happen?” I said, dropping my monocle. “Kamala Harris is a proven leader. Radical chic. A pleasing hum, a trusted caretaker. Checked all of the boxes. Her resume is impeccable. Why risk all of that for a thrice impeached Cheeto?” “Because they are eating the dogs. They’re eating the cats that are in there.” “But the news said it was baseless! There was no Ring footage. They made it up. Harris laughed. It’s absurd. Why trust the bottomless Pinocchio?” “Because they are eating the dogs. They’re eating the cats that are in there.” “But global warming is a thing! Trump brushed it off. Helena killed 230 people. Isn’t that a bigger deal than fantasy?” “Because they are eating the dogs. They’re eating the cats that are in there.” “But what does that mean? And why risk our precious democracy? Turn the executive treasury into a Sharper Image. “Because they are eating the dogs. They’re eating the cats that are in there.” “In where? That’s not even what he said. Watch the footage!” “Because sometimes I look into the mirror and I scream. Because inside that so-called pleasant hum I recognize mocking laughter. Because the twilight of the gods needs a decent Ragnarök. Because the viking funeral throws off embers of eternal golden arches. Because B.F. Skinner forgot the pellets. Because even a Clockwork Orange is right twice a day. Because I don’t trust your embrace. Because I prefer singing the YMCA so I can see where your hands are. Because I’d gladly trade sensitivity training for a donkey show. Because the house may wear white, but it still has a back door. Because what happens in D.C. stays in D.C. Because everybody knows that the dice are loaded. Because the flag still stands for freedom: red in tooth and claw, royal white, and blue balls. Because the red pill is the new blue chew. Because I prefer an honest criminal to a lying cop. Because I can see the future and it doesn’t work. Because I can see the future and it is murder. Because I can’t stop thinking about that Vladimir Nabokov, author of the Lolita Express. Nothing is more exhilarating than Philistine vulgarity. Because Nabokov is a pedophile. Because poetry is for homos. Because standing in line is for homos. Because SNL isn’t funny. Because Get ‘er done. Because irritable mental gestures would seek to resemble middle fingers. Because hell is empty and all the devils are here. Because when the sunlight dapples in the lake, it is actually beautiful. Because Sea Peoples is just another word for beautiful boaters. Because Ba ba ba ba ba I’m lovin’ it. Because school is out. Because everything solid melts into the air. Because logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead. Because our values are under attack. Because they said Come and See but there is nothing on. So a rerun will do. Because the sound of a smashed monocle is the perfect rhythm to dance to. Because I love water-boarding with liberal tears. Because fuck your feelings. Because sit down little man. Because the customer is always right. Because I guess Diet Mountain Dew is actually good. Because reality is boring. Because chanting opens up new worlds of possibilities. But most of all, because they are eating the dogs, they’re eating the cats that are in there. So what are you waiting for? Get in there.”

Nabeel

Really wish Matt were back. Respect to Will, Felix, and Chris, but without his visionary insight the show tends towards esoteric mediocrity. Love y’all and hope you keep at it no matter what. But just stating a fact

Greasy_Jones

strokes of genius lmao did it make him more powerful or something, imagine if this happened to Lenin

Dan Brothers

Is there a list of Matt's best rants? I want to revisit some.

Andrew Cross

where’s my fucking Schnipper’s (the new ep)

AEC

That’s been stuck in my head 😂 Ginsberg did do all that stuff he did 😄 tho/yet… I have not looked into it. pdf file is also so memey , it’s still in the same realm of like…wha parody? comedy? meta? 😆🫣

AEC

Lol OPEN pdf file 🤣 I didn’t catch that 🤣

Jon W

Any idea if these poems are posted anywhere? Wanted to read them again

Natalie

Also you should be able to tip prisoners alex legendary idea

Tucker McCann

“Red pill is the new blue chew”

Natalie

I think I will unironically support using taxpayer money to pay for prisoners transitioning surgeries

Natalie

Someone posted a transcript in the comments!

NoPrefect

"Because B. F. Skinner forgot the pellets."

J fraser cartwright

So with the subtext from the prose poem, as a new leftist, I’m supposed to eat the dogs and eat the cats to show my support?

Alexander Johnson

Ashbery's most famous collection is Self-Portrait in a Convex Mirror, but I think his most 'accessible' is Hotel Lautreamont. Matt's poem in particular reminded me of "Grand Galop" which is a perfectly weird & intimate depiction of some sort of an experience. It's a good introduction to that 'era' of modern poetry. Hope that helps.

Jon W

Gratzi

Mark

Loved hearing Matt. ❤️✌️🤘

Michael

Yes. Upload a video and tag the chapo team they'll really appreciate it

Brandon Wimer

Fantastic episode. Just premium. So happy to hear Matt.

sophie

check out AcidMarxist on youtube! i think they have a compilation