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772 - Tales From the Yelp feat. Bryan Quinby (10/12/23) (Patreon)

Published:
2023-10-13 03:37:17
Edited:
2023-10-13 17:10:39
Imported:
2026-06

Downloads

Content

Podfather Bryan Quinby returns to the show for some spoofs and goofs. We catch up with various radio personalities and explore some D.C. gossip, then Bryan takes us on a tour of some of his favorite types of guy he’s encountered so far while making his new show GUYS.

Find Guys wherever you get podcasts and get all of Bryan’s premium content including Guys+ here: https://www.patreon.com/MurderXBryan

Files

Comments

sir peepus

death to israel :))))))

ploob

MURDER BRYAN

NewTooshFatoosh

My weekly trip outta the suck to listen to the boyys. ✌️

Will Thompson

Oh hell yeah it’s a guys night dicks out

ffffffff

i hope all the boys are convinced to go join bryan at hedonism 2 as a result of this ep

j

Kratom hour is a go

Nico

Bryan's gentle friendly voice soothing my soul rn

GhostofCadia

Dude, the Crypt Keeper ignites an adrenaline response in me like almost getting in a car crash. That guy traumatized the fuck out of me when I was a little kid.

O'Malley

Chapo live at Hedo when

Thom

the memory of that taste instinctively made me throw up

Jeffrey Miller

Felix on fire, "Normalizing diplomatic relations with a new celebrity" and "Seeing your dad wearing a Kangol hat"

Raoul Duke

Lmao at the “Naomi Klein” slip. Actually Chapo should have her on too tho

ploob

SHARK GUYS!!

Greg

Okay, I know we’re making fun of frivolous complaints, but I fucking hate states that don’t call it the DMV. “Oh no, we’re different it’s the *bureau* of motor vehicles.” Miss me with that shit!

plainwrap

As someone who runs a small neighborhood business I can tell you there's gotta be a little siren that must go off at Yelp HQ whenever a 2-star or less review comes in because within minutes of it dropping your email gets spammed with offers from Yelp to 'improve' your listing for a small fee. And the longer you ignore it the more their emails start to sound like a shakedown from Paulie Walnuts.

Jenkum Terry

I had to look up Kevin Smith's movie theater and it turns out they will be showing the Taylor Swift Eras Tour movie and now I really want to take a trip to the Smodcastle to see a movie would never see under any other circumstances.

Jack

Fuck.. I caught a stray with that South Park comment

George Mitri

Bryan discussing the foibles of Guys was a necessary, necessary vibe cleanse to the grisly news of this week. Thank you.🙏🏼

jay alan

Quite a mid Walgreens … 3 stars

Equality State Of Mind

I once gave my county jail a 3-star review, as though they were a mediocre pizza place I had gotten a delivery from. Caused quite a stir...

Jack Dulaney

I didn’t catch it, so he’s going to go to Hedonism II?

Ross McWilliams

Ending on a flub. Paying the ultimate tribute to guys.

Watermane

I'm a bit of a guy myself

Poppy Chulo

This one isn't doing it for me.

Cameron Keyser

Stayed in a Microtel last October with family, in Winston-Salem, NC, for a wedding. Bride’s mom put us up there. My Cousins’ room didn’t even have a door. A door. One star.

Last Years Man

As a follower of Will's Letterboxd, I'll be keeping an eye out.

neowave

That excerpt from Naomi Klein reads like it was ghostwritten by Kamala Harris.

syd

nude weed whacking is insane

Sam

Trump’s definitely a guy who curses in private, but in a way that’s just as artificial as him keeping it clean in public. Right before he said “grab em by the pussy” he confusingly said “I moved on her like a bitch.” The most normal swear-user.

William

Tried guys- just can’t stand the co host

Jaime Christley

I'm listening to the Olaf Palme miniseries at Ghost Stories for the End of the World and I'm grasping more of the lore there than here.

Jaime Christley

*25 minutes on something called "Chives TV"* hehe ok,

b-rar

1 star comment. Tag your spoilers please

Whucko Jaang

I am glad this episode dealt with only mundane topics of little consequence because I have yet to disagree with so many of you's takes. Funny stuff though

Evan Scott

I must live in the only pro-Palestine part of the country because this really doesn't feel anything like post-9/11 to me

Watermane

Olof Palme would be a Chives guy today

Watermane

I needed this kind of episode rn

Nick

Anyone have a link to Quora Raiders?

Jaime Christley

Naomi Klein’s Guardian piece is really worth reading because she is now basically a showboating asshole whose every word drips with condescension and bullshit. There’s no shortage of awful posts and articles coming out of our shitty moment but hers is the one that’s being passed around most by people I normally respect/consider as friends.

K H

I have been avoiding any news from the major outlets. Of course even I am not sick enough to use Twitter. What state/part of the US do you live? I have been encouraged by 2 things. Tulsi Gabbard seemed like she was getting trashed on her social media by the oafs that usually simp for her. Additionally some corporate newsletters I've seen have actually included Gaza as a thing which would require aid and haven't viscerally come down for Israel and only Israel. I also haven't had anyone try to discuss it with me in real life yet. The memes from the zoomers seem to not understand, but are slotted into the "corporations are profiting off conflict template." So perhaps there is some level of innoculation. On the other hand there are so many bozo haters even in Chapo comments tut tutting Hamas.

Jenkum Terry

To experience the magic of cinema.

Bryce Rodriguez

I need some reviews of the guy who cooks in the hotel bathrooms

Bradley Rosson

Felix and Brian call in show "Who phone nudist?"

jack flowers

i think they've done 2 eps with her, but i'd take a 3rd!

Jaime Christley

Jesus Christ this Patreon redesign looks like fucking Windows 8.

Sparky

Will go one episode without simping over Nancy Mace challenge

Guy Guyerson

I went to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame yesterday 😅

Cory Gipson

I’m grateful to Bryan Quimby for giving Chapo a platform to rise from, but I find him exhausting the same way I would a 2000s zoo crew FM morning show host.

Cory Gipson

I’m confused by how perplexed they are by Trump swearing. He swears more on-camera than any current or former president I can recall.

Evan Scott

I'm in philly. Im banned from twitter now so maybe that's part of my perception but from what i've seen, in person actions have been overwhelmingly pro-palestine, dwarfing any kind of Zionist counter demonstrations which have been mostly old people. I don't mean this observation to imply that I think that the majority of people here are pro-palestine, but if there had been a pro-Afghanistan or anti-interventionist demonstration on 9/13/2001 I feel like people would've been killed Even in my wider social circles (i used to work in a restaurant group owned by a bunch of insane Zionists who like take staff on annual trips to israel and shit so I'm not totally insulated) the most Zionist stuff i've seen is like fundraisers for medical aid for israelis and like condemnations of Hamas specifically. Which like, yeah i get that that's not the perfect line, but for normy libs to draw that distinction is DRAMATICALLY different from what I remember the attitude being like 22 years ago. If their was a congresswoman who had an Afghan flag hanging from her office then i'm fairly confident she would've been immediately expelled and probably like fucking beaten in the streets. Even our local paper had an article that was like interviews with Israelis *and* Gazans locally about their anxieties over family members in the region. Could you imagine the NYT running a story on 9/13/01 featuring interviews with Afghans who have concerns with the US response? Idk the whole thing is maddening but I feel like the comparisons to post-9/11 kind of cheapen that. It was completely unfathomable to express anything along the lines of even-handedness back then, at least from what I remember. But maybe that's also because I was much younger and didn't pick up on nuance as much and lived in a suburban/exurban area instead of in a major city? IDK it feels a lot different to me

James Blackmon

I love this stupid podcast. Great episode.

Brian

I tried reading her recent book, and I was like how can there still be 300 pages to go….

Brian

I live nearby. Don’t bother. Or I mean, whatever.

Mark Ambrose

Kevin Smith as Daniel Plainview or Hearst for his type of Guys had me in tears. One of the most needed episodes in a while.

busty maiden

just saying "in minecraft" to someone as the new "an hero"

Jaime Christley

"media types" should be allowed 12 years to dine out on their early hits, tops.

Instantdumbass

Here for David the shark content. Fintastic episode 🫡

Cody Ross Rex

God I love this. Prayers up for the genius bastard, Matt Motherfucking Christman.

T

I don't think so... She called Chapo "not capable of introspection" in an interview last month because Chapo did an episode about animal facts at the height of COVID.

Matt Murray

Can you guys please do a reading series over the guardian article "You be the judge: should my Boyfriend stop carrying his huge water bottle everywhere? "

June

a real earthiness :)

Petar Cirjakovic

This episode has helped calm my ass down, thanks y’all

Demented Avenger

Howard Stern has become the nose he used to tweak

Nico

I, too, enjoy Boston (1976) by the band Boston.

MEAT CLOWN

The new patreon site design is absolutely heinous

Mark Schneider

I never gave the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame much thought, though I enjoyed Johnny Ramone's nihilistic statement when awarded, "God Bless George W. Bush, & God Bless the United States!" Very punk, in both the good & bad way. But good on 'em for never giving Boston the award, even when they started when I was in High School I knew they sucked rancid balls.

Sean McGrier

Trump called Kaepernick a son of a bitch like seven years ago.

The Children of Jack Acid

My favorite part is when you click "Load Replies" and the entire podcast stops and goes back to zero.

Oliver guerrero

I love you guys…. We’re all brothers and sisters under the skin…

The Children of Jack Acid

In hindsight, of COURSE Will and Felix loved Howard Stern and Opie & Anthony. And thus the Dirtbag Left arose. But I think this show would be a lot better if they'd been Phil Hendrie fans.

dawood

Hoping Bryan adds a stop at chilkoot charlies while in ak. That would be a bit like david attenborough visiting subsaharan africa

Travis Marmon

Jethro Tull guy reminds me of when I saw Weezer for free and a guy kept shouting "BUDDY HOLLY," then left as soon as they started playing it

Brian

Absolutely need to see that titties post from the chive

Taylor Markey

That’s right Will, fuck the Diamondbacks. Kershaw choke artist.

SquirtSommolier

Mentioning yelp brought back the traumatic memory of getting fired from a coffee shop for a bad review. I had agonizing lower back pain, forced to work despite it, and a guy got uppity on yelp because I didn't smile when he asked for 2%.

James Proulx

I'm confused by someone claiming that they can't drink cold water without it upsetting their stomach. Aren't we like 70% water? If you can't drink water without it having a negative physical affect on you, it's probably because you're part alien or vampire or some shit. See a doctor. Or maybe just stop making shit up.

Jared Adams

Yeah, after Trump officially pulled out of the 2012 campaign he field tested swearing in his routine but Republicans found it too distasteful at the time.

NobleStrings

listening to Bryan is like chatting with your tribal tat uncle over a couple cans of Hamm's but without the racism and misogyny. gotta love 'im.

Andrew

I think the titties limerick is from something else, maybe The Man Show? I swear I've heard that before.

ploob

Common misconception. Your body is actually 90% meat.

ploob

SHARK GUYS ep..? 🤞

Ian Priest

God the fucking Henry Cavill shit is the bane of the Warhammer fan's existence, it's so fucking lame. He made a passing comment in an interview about being a fan years ago and these reddit ass mfers are still going on about it.

Brian

I NEVER hear about this Hedonism 2 place unless Bryan is on a podcast. Dude just needs to admit he wants to go

Alex

It's a Chinese thing

Gagortion

anyone got this skateboard dildo video?

Wario Argento

I think it's Tigger's rhyme from Winnie the Pooh, which raises all kinds of questions one's psychiatrist might ask.

Mike Mariano

It was advertised on the radio all the time when I was a teen so I thought it must be pretty wild. It’s probably less of a health hazard than Burning Man.

ocelotte

You guys would love my dad, he's a guy who wore a kangol all through my childhood and would constantly brag about his Quora "coffee expert" credentials every opportunity he could get. He eventually started a business with a Colombian man he met on Quora and was shocked when the dude took all the money and ran.

Brendan Kneeland

Not handy but Your Mom’s House podcast featured the guy (Pierce Paris) who did it, I’m sure it’s in their Reddit page somewhere. Pierce is a treasure

Ben Frawley

There’s a bowling alley in Madison that plays Chive TV and when you’re wasted it is quite hypnotic

Jay Bee Jay

I am 100% using that Rock N Roll Hall of Fame rant

Dan Anderson

I was in my early 30's when 911 happened. Really similar vibes right now. Very fucked

Trevor Wookfield

Thanks for the funny episode. It was a nice break from the void of reality.

T

Um...

Dearl Venneder

It’s straight up confusing, Wolff Olins redesigned it. Sad!

Nick

Thank you!

Gulb

Gotta disagree about Nancy Mace. She looks like she's about to eat a mouse.

Frank

In regards to ChiveTV, it might be true that it could lead to patrons spending longer at bars. It was on at a bar once on a Thursday night while I waited for some wings at a 'American style' pub in Milwaukee. I'll admit to being somewhat transfixed by the quick cuts between various bad things happening to people, each one instilling a vague feeling of wanting to know how each scenario played out. A more inebriated individual might not be able to pull themselves away.

joao z

capsules

Jessica Rios

I was 31 when it happened and there was soooo much more unity then. There were virtually no dissenting voices. Maybe because the internet wasn’t such a big thing back then.

james

Watching guys now are we? Ok Redbar

Jessica Rios

I’m so old and so female that I had to look up who Kevin Smith was to get through this episode.

Kevin Boyle

No, see its cold water. Room temperature water is where its at. Imperialists, you see, need refrigeration whereever they go; whereas third worldist low impact human humans drink water at 90 degrees. If you need water below 50 degrees; you are a human animal.

Jason Matthews

I wonder if "Wandering Bishop" is one of Bryan's Guys, because I found one who posts on Amazon, recently. They seem to have fun.

Thomas Silva

I would like to point out that the titties limerick is explicitly written in the style of the song Tigger sings in Winnie the Pooh. Like, the original Winnie the Pooh. "The wonderful thing about Tiggers, is Tiggers are wonderful things, their tops are made out of rubbers, their bottoms are made out of springs" etc

J.P. McD.

I’ve seen people criticize Chapo as being “merely” 1990s style shock jocks and I laugh because Mr. Chapo would be extremely flattered by the comparison and there’s nothing wrong with that

Jessica Rios

How do you know I’m not? I’m not but how do you know? lol.

Last Years Man

phil hendrie was great until he lost his mind after 911. it was like losing a friend

Robert Dragani

Do y’all think RFK going independent will throw the election?

Bobi Jon-son Kenobi

I visited my grandma a few months ago in SoCal out in the desert. I went to this bar and grill a couple times, and they were playing Chive TV. After watching it while waiting for my food, I could definitely see what they mean about the 90 minutes thing

g$

buddy i’ve been waiting years for chapo to talk about the stern show

Liz

Bryan is so fuckin funny! Great episode guys!

Matthew Rogers

So glad Bryan was on again, I've loved the guys podcast one of my favorites right now

Aaron R

Deeply deeply healing episode

J.P. McD.

I got the Pirates of the Caribbean (2003) reference Will!!

Dustin Nelson

Eh I cried at Godzilla vs. Destroyah. Yeah I was 9 but still

J.v.D

dear god we need matt back soon

E

as a Flubhead, I'm deeply disappointed in this episode. Love Bryan but he didn't give us an new flub material

Conner

Felix coming in from the top rope with the deadwood references👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼

Baby Bobby

I got flutes on my head but don’t call me a tull head

Matt Baber

At my douchey barbershop each station has their own little flatscreen. My barber plays nothing but ChiveTv. Twice a month I get to drink a tallboy and watch 25 min of epic fails at 10 am without anyone judging me. It’s glorious.

Lautaro

Didn't know that ChiveTV was a thing. After hearing some of the show last night I ended up at a bar with a TV dedicated to ChiveTV.

Ryan

I left the most scathing review of a Chicago Fire game experience this past week when they prompted me (via email survey). I was, indeed, seeing absolute red, but it felt great after!

Post Void

#FreeTheBidenHog

Post Void

It's all leading up to Joe Biden walking on stage with his penis hanging out of his zipper.

John Tillman

Other good google reviews to look up are strip clubs and police stations.

D.O.D

Felix coming in with a "Lego" pronunciation like it's an Italian sauce

CHET_BIGTRUCK

Thanks for all the hard work you do to help Chris James have one joke

Justin

Matt is back on Twitter, and it's perfect

Ginny

It's all post maxi up in here!

T

Hhyswixw! People are saying it more and more!

The Children of Jack Acid

Amen. I liked it in a weird way, though, even though I missed his content, because it crystallized the Boomer experience and helped me understand their mindset, which roughly boils down to: "When WE protested in the 60s and 70s, we were good people. But kids who protest America now are spoiled morons."

Wario Argento

Hhyswixw is a Pontypool event, and I'm here for it. Iä R'lyea!

Mangomoosh

La quinta was pretty good also

Dang

When they were riffing about the shark guy I realized I was instinctively waiting for Matt to say something and got real sad Hope he's doing well

Oliver guerrero

What’s wrong with being old married guy who’s still excited to fuck his wife?

ploob

MORE KATH MORE KATH

ploob

Flub Flub Flub

Horse Badorties

If I could be bothered, I would give the San Francisco jail 5 stars. It was a real life panopticon!

Horse Badorties

And I quote: "A guy who worked here attacked my car with his fists. Apparently he had a problem with where I parked (in the lot). There were no signs regarding any designated spaces, so I just parked in a standard spot. The manager saw the assault but did NOTHING."

Horse Badorties

Get Alice Avizandum as a guest- she's a Matt-level Marxist social commenter, and trans with a beautiful plummy accent.

Jason Matthews

Despite having near total guest overlap, I don't think the pods are on the best terms. Impenetrable insider baseball shit.

Mike

Could this guy get a shittier mic? I can still kind of understand what he’s saying

Zach H.

Nancy Mace has the Sarah Palin problem. Both look like you could shave slices of beef with their jawlines. Disturbing.

Nimbly Bimbly As FUCK

That Kozy Inn is on South High street in Columbus. The Speedway plays loud ass opera music to keep houseless, and other people away

Andrew Irwin

I think Felix was on it not too long ago?

Laura

That Olaf Palme series was really something. I was lost most of the time, but I couldn't stop listening.

Dk .

Lmao I there’s a bar and grill in my city called Sam’s that plays chive tv when there’s no sport on. Amazing to see my 60 year old dad be mesmerized by fail comps. Wonderful bonding experience tbh.

John Newman

More Bryan plz! He helped me become a drug & alcohol therapist, so anytime he comes on I'll be listening (though I'm usually doing that anyway lulz).

KatrinaJadeHelm

Glad to see Quorators getting love from Will. Alex and Jeremy are great

Horse Badorties

That's a shame. CTH needs to recruit fresh blood.

Degrassi Knoll

Howard had a segment on his show called "Guess Who's the Jew" featuring a (genuine) Klansman in full garb. Yeah - UNCANCELABLE

Michael Sterrett

Love Bryan! Always great to hear him in the 3rd mic seat 😎

Jon Lyons

we get to have 1 guy who represents the nation's intrusive thoughts

GoblinHitPoints

I’ve been to the flying pig, this is very funny