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EDIT: Original post of this episode contained some muted audio clips. File is now fixed, redownload to correct.

We start off today’s episode with a farewell to the DeSantis campaign as the Never Back Down PAC backs down, and dedicates its last days to puzzling through Iowa to the Moon Palace Retreat. We discuss Biden’s general lack of a coherent position going into this long, long general campaign, and how it’s leaving his would-be defenders in the lurch. BUT, for the main thrust of this ep, we celebrate one man: The Beekeeper. Because when the hive is threatened, when the Queen is producing faulty Offspring, then there’s one man you must call. To Bee or Not To Bee? To bee, bitch. Let’s keep some bees.

Tickets to Talking Simpsons at SF Sketchfest on 1/24 here: https://sfsketchfest2024.sched.com/event/1VUtV/talking-simpsons

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Comments

Dillon

Chris ftw w the quick fix

T

First

chapotraphouse

Sorry for the track muting issues in the original post. Absolutely bizarre error in Audition where it randomly leveled down like 40% of the clips in the episode. I swear this has never happened to me before, baby.

Matt

I remember back in the day when they just didn't fix the fucked audio

Richard

Great because I ❤️ amber

Cardboard

mistakes happen! thanks for correcting it so quickly

Lord Drewcifer

They're silencing our girl for speaking the truth about the Kincaid Industrial Complex

andrew rogers

Missing Matt on this occasion, his Meatball Ron takes are always great

NYCM&AHole

Mike Judge never makes these kinds of mistakes

D

Chris always delivers. That's why I'm lucky to call him a very good real life friend. We always have a great time hanging out. Best friends, really.

m@tt

Can be improved by 20% with the right boots. -Ron

Jeremy

Said this on the other post, but I was really hoping you guys would do The Beekeeper! When we saw it I whispered to my wife “this is the most Chapo movie ever” at one point.

T

Will's point about bragging... 💯

Ozzie

Rest in piss Meatball Ron

NYCM&AHole

“Ron!” in “Jeb!” font

Sam

The LeBron of podcasting saves the day again

Matt James Rich

The version on Spotify says it came out in 2023

COM

Sweet I thought I was loosing my mind lol

Matt LS

Took my dumbass 20 minutes while listening at the gym to realize Amber's audio stopped working

Schwartz666

............................thx homie

TenderPodcastLover

I would listen to chapo if it was coming out of the toilet from Trainspotting. No matter how fucked up the audio got, eventually I would climb in. Fight me you disgusting Audiophilic freaks.

Schwartz666

During the long silences on the 1st upload, I tried to conjure up Matt responses in my head.

Jessica Rios

Missing Matt in every damn episode. 😢

Drew

❤️❤️❤️

Nolan

Wow how bout a big Little Saint James round of applause for Chris.

Jessica Rios

So true about with Meatball Ron leaving, there is no more fun left in this election. Remember when Ron first talked about running and we all were like Oh hell, this is gonna be GREAT. Trump is going to manhandle him and destroy him in the debates and rip him to shreds on social media but no. We couldn’t even get that because dumbass Ron never got close enough to Trump to threaten him enough to even debate him and he went pretty lightly on him because Ron was no threat. Very disappointing.

Andrew

A professional 🫡

Bryan B

We need the next episode to cover the Tim Scott engagement pls

Michael S. Judge

when DeSantis Nazis say "1488," they mean 14 Words + Hungwy! Hungwy!

Ryan Pearce

Biden should take Trump's argument that the president has complete immunity and assassinate him

Sam Schick

Bet you five dollars Sean mcelwee makes that puzzle his new Christmas tradition

Andrew Cross

damn this amber lady is funny, she should be on the show full time

David

Chris is the GOAT

McGuire

Loved this episode, Amber is the best.

J Lit

Chris spitting this ep

Kinetics Video

Would have been a happy hog either way but appreciate the effort in the slop

Coldern

This sounds totally different on Spotify.

Casey Edmondson

Ep 800 bringing the exotic Will/Amber/Chris permutation and it really delivers.

Schwartz666

Wishing it was Pack v Lions next week.. but now I'm rootin for you guys to the end! 🦁

Scoot

Rob has bitch tits

jay k.

such a huge fan of amber being on the show more nowadays, she’s hilarious

Dick Van Sexel

Great episode, loving Amber's return, but miss Matt. Beekeeper was so damn fun. The cowboy bebop movie is also playing. Don't miss seeing it on the big screen

William Evans

Pretty sinister way to get back to paying for the slop, but I guess I shouldn’t have put it past you. Still censoring (deliberately?) Amber’s best bits on Spotify and I am an Amber white knight after all. Here’s your $4.70, don’t spend it all in one place, you cretins.

Philo Marx

Hilarious. Amber is always welcome ❤️

Kevin

This episode is what it sounds like if Will was the most immature member of Chapo

Antipaganda

Is it my weird tits? The guy said that cream would fix it!

K H

I mean yea. Every Democrat is a pussy though. You could literally just delete your political rivals. Would not even have to hide it like the Clintons.

Jordan Brewer

Beekeeper was awesome. I loved that Statham punched thru every Kevlar vest imaginable. Also the goofy New Zealander mercenary was so over the top loved him

The Children of Jack Acid

I have a theory that Amber was conceived the very INSTANT that John Hinckley Jr. shot that Reagan guy.

IT ME

The puzzle does look nice

Charles Perks

Been a patron for going on 8 years, not sure if I ever commented before, but I just wanna say from the bottom of my heart that I love amber so much. Her voice and evil humor and brilliance and quick simple wit has been sorely missed for so long, and it’s just real friggen nice to have her back. My winter depression demands I only read shit like The Hobbit and Dune sequels atm, but can’t wait to snap out of it so I can crack into her new book. Long live Amber.

William Evans

Origin is straight up trash, hyped for the inevitable episode. Amongst other things, a scene of the shooting of Trayvon Martin foregrounded with a gigantic skittles wrapper.

Garth Hillsborough

Amber stop interrupting with banal observations challenge

Dustin Nelson

What os this Ark Survival Evolved episode icon? I'm into it

THEKILLERWHALE

"The Beequel" was sitting right there for the second Beekeeper film. Do better guys.

THEKILLERWHALE

My friend has a theory that the biological father of Jodie Foster's kids is actually JHJ since his intention was to assassinate Reagan in order to impress her and, even though it was a bit traumatizing for her at time, with the benefit of hindsight it was actually a pretty cool thing to do.

MEAT CLOWN

RETURNING CHAMPION AMBER 👏 A👏LEE 👏 FROST 👏💪

Kinetics Video

I too wish our country was lead by Onion Biden

KT Lain

Amber's back, finally!

Fat_H

Amber's back! Wahoooooo!

Wyatt Arnold

From Chandler, AZ and didn't vote for Biden in 2020 as well. I feel the same about that decision as Will

Erik

Jason Statham go on Chapo

William

Chris occasionally sounds like he’s been watching old Matt film, trying to match his vocal cadence and style

Michael Brandt

Cormac McCarthy paraphrasing! Way to go Chris.

Brody Knaak

Wait, did Amber say boyfriend? I thought her and Matt were married with a kid

Jim Chapman

Now the entire anti-Trump vote is behind Nikki Haley, and she’s still going to eat shit.

Hunter Lang

Please get me out of this libertarian hellhole state

Charvis Blutchard

Matt is married to a different Amber whose last name is Rollo lol

William

Damn Lee Harvey was a beekeeper this whole time

MEAT CLOWN

Amber is a treasure you bitch

Horseloverfat

I AM BRINGING THE PUZZLE TO IQUITOS

Sean Harriman

Bees have a spiritual connection, no life without bees. Look at Jupiter ascending LOL

Doug Cartel

you're saying the desantis campaign isn't re-enacting the scene from Patton where the nazis are burning all their paperwork "every time someone tried to tell him to stop doing the puzzle he shouted NEVER BACK DOWN"

Wagner Koop

Blue Waffle SS is so funny lmao

Jennifer Wiren

[deep pause] You know what they say? You gotta -bee- yourself!

will michel

congrats on 800 episodes you freaks

C. Andrew

Congrats on 800 episodes!

Waffle Poet

Mr. Wade was on fire this episode, and it’s always a pleasure when Ms. Frost finds her way back into the trap. Really, really fun episode. Thanks Chapo! Edit: Oh, and stochastic beekeepers around 51:15.

beebop

the Will Statham voice is always a treat

Brody Knaak

Ok so you all aren't messing with me, Matt is married to a different Amber, not Amber Rollo?

g$

i’ll die an amber defender

tyler

Caste would make for an excellent book review episode. sub pop history that seeks to connect nazi germany, american racism, and the indian caste system into one thing with a tinge of social darwinism thrown in for good measure (in one chapter she admiringly points to wolves and their natural ability to know who is the the alpha and who is the beta

Torpedo Jones

Still got the muted audio on the Spotify upload

Dyyyyylan

The person on this podcast is Amber A’lee Frost.

George P

a bunch of Dems are gonna show up to vote for her in New Hampshire tonight and it won't matter at all lol

Damen Irving

Blue waffle ss will be in my head for a while

Jaime Christley

You have a much greater chance of affecting what movie wins the Academy Award for Best Picture than who gets elected POTUS. You have a much greater chance of winning the Powerball jackpot than tilting the POTUS election one way or another.

Matt Murray

Glad that Amber has been back on lately.

Matthew Krueger

"But you don't understand sir, that's Peter Cucumber the big oil magnate!" "I don't care if he's Mr. Dill Pickle, he's going to be searched." All cops really are bastards.

Andrew Lopez

Will obviously doesn’t do many jigsaw puzzles if he thinks 1000 pieces is especially large

Vincent W Troia

i live in michigan - the state that is probably going to decide the election. i will vote for biden. better than the project 2025 republicans trying to end our democracy outright. will talking about morals and voting sounds like a dumb dumb. it isn’t and has never been about morals. duh. love the show though, and will too.

ectoslavia

I fucking love Amber.

Wes

Wonder if the entire cast of the beekeeper not being from the states was a way of circumventing the SAG strike

Dan Young

Still a muted channel. Check 20m 55s

Matthew

Amber 🙌

Jaime Christley

in the old days, you could clobber a policeman over the head with a 2x4 and the most he could do was shout "oooh! get outta here before I run you in!" the downside was, if you were to walk past them looking funny, and they squinted at you suspiciously and put their hands on their hips, well, that was it for you. very soon you'd be running from 10,000 police officers and you'd need a fortuitously placed wooden plank, serving as a see-saw, to escape. also: if you were sitting on a park bench at night, that meant you were a prostitute, or soliciting one.

Ant koz

They’re polyamorous

Ed C.

Finally a Chapo flub for all the Flub-heads out there!

Tenley

I dunno how they explain it in the movie, but when a hive wants to dethrone a queen a wad of workers ball around her and overheat her with vibrations. It's called Cuddle Death.

Jim E

Given that he co-hosted and probably edited all of Hell of Presidents and Hell on Earth you can’t begrudge the man a little Matt mindset. It’s probably unintentional

jay k.

polyamberous

Hot Rod

Thankyou Chris for such quick work to fix the episode.

sweetiepie

"Sounds like a dumb dumb" our fate is in the hands of first graders tackling their first writing assignment.

Tom

Who keeps the beekeepers?

Jaime Christley

I'm pitching a revenge thriller called THE BUD GROWER, starring Emily Blunt. Folks,

Justin Comer

RSS feed is still giving me the flubbed file for some reason. Had to hop on my computer and download the file straight off a browser, like a hacker.

owen

Machine-gun-truck-girl was probably from South Shore MA

aahAAHaah

Amber delivers the two funniest lines in today's episode, I love it. The Spotify upload still has the audio gaps so I had to come here to listen to it.

Jeremy C-M

+1 to this, rss feed still giving me a file with audio gaps

Simon Maraya

I'm in Ohio and don't plan on voting for Biden again. If Biden loses Ohio by one vote, then boy will my face be red! Otherwise it's between me and god.

Ronald Shoe

I thought this was gonna be about Kamala and the K hive

chapotraphouse

The RSS stuff is annoying since it distributes to so many places, it’s hard to figure out where the issue is. I just scrubbed through corrected files on both the public feed and my grey wolf feed on my personal overcast, so don’t know what to tell you.I’m also currently in a plane directly over Des Moines (hi Justin) so not much I can do for rest of day.

Justin Comer

I'm looking up at your plane now. I have the corrected file so I'm all set 🤷‍♂️

CJ

Blue Waffle SS is so fucking good holy shit Amber

Jeremy C-M

Man. The internet, how tf does it work? That's cool im just gonna d/l from here.

Mark Schneider

I'd only vote for Butcher Biden with a gun to my head. I was a Dem for over 40 years. If I had a gun to my head & had to pick Genocide Joe or Drumpf, I'd go Drumf. At least he'd likely get the Empire out of Ukraine. (PS-- grew up in Illinois-- got falsely arrested once in Ohio; I live in Minnesota now, used to travel to Michigan for weed, but now it's legal here!)

BTULTRA

Thanks for putting up with me… and my bees

Greasy_Jones

The perfidious Chapos once again silencing women's voices

Greasy_Jones

Amber just dropping Samurai Jack references as if i'm not going to start hooting and hollering

Paul

Great Ep y’all, more amber plz

Tyler S

I think the 911th should be the next big milestone episode

james

1:09:27 you’ve been FROSTED Chris😂😂

Jaime Christley

really enjoying how Chris is getting into the rhythm of the show - before Matt had his crisis (and prayers continue to be up), his contributions always seemed couched in "Hey sorry to butt in, I'll make this fast, sorry sorry sorry". You got a good radio voice and you got jokes, Chris!

Jaime Christley

also - and I'm objectively a year late seeing this - if you're looking for a short, insane, and incredibly gratifying ownage-fest, walk don't run to SISU (available on all major VOD platforms). It's a hair under 90 minutes, and the premise is simple: near the waning days of WW2, a platoon of nasty Nazis are doing scorched earth on their way thru the Finnish hinterlands when they come across some far out old man. They make the mistake of fucking with him. That's it. Go forth and see SISU.

NoPrefect

Bye-bye Ron. Bye-bye!

K H

If you weren't high watching the Beekeeper you would know the political message was at the end where Jason Keeper literally looks into the camera and asks "Do you serve the law, or do you serve justice" while speaking to the FBI agent that had been chasing him. It is a message to the FBI and secret service. Law vs justice and his last act is literally killing the President's son(likely meant to be the Pres herself). It is a very Facebook patriots movie.

K H

Yea...it is definitely Hilldog or Joe Biden gender swapped with Hunter as her kid. Trump is not on the radar. Self dealing is not on audience radar as a Trump thing.

K H

YAAAsssss!

William Beamish

When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom let it bee let it bee

Sheep

Why did they keep talking over Amber?

Sheep

what?

Alex

I think a low voter turn out would say more than a vote for Biden. I certainly understand if like abortion or some other issue on the ballot is out there for people to vote on. But Biden? They should be arresting that buffoon for the havoc he’s wrecking, I can’t be expected to vote for him. Democrats had 4 years to earn my vote, instead they chose to take a hatchet to progressive priorities and started a bunch of wars. Those were calculated, ‘risk managed’ decisions. People got paid to make them, and I’m not obligated to validate them. Thumbs down

Jack Ross

Amber dropping a samurai Jack reference has instantly made her my favorite podcaster out there please come back on the show

Vincent W Troia

nah he won’t. he’d say he’d get us out of ukraine, like he said he’d get us out of afghanistan (biden did, and don’t give a shit about biden), but there’s too many weapons contractors and people making money off ukraine. trump would punk out on that cuz he does what he’s told by his overlords. plus that’s not why he and the republicans are worse. they’re worse because they’re trying to end democracy with project 2025, they want to gut social security (trump would allow this to happen don’t kid yourself), and they want to break up any union/workers progress, etc etc. want a reason to vote for the dems besides just a block? look what they’ve done with anti-trust laws. i can go on but this is too long now

Vincent W Troia

can’t make an argument so criticize the language. weak.

Sheep

What do you mean? She's literally on this episode

MrKlondikeGuy

As a Gray Man defender I am very excited to see The Beekeeper.

Zach H.

There are no Gallants in politics, folks. It’s Goofuses all the way down.

Lindsay R

I work in an office puzzle office and will be sharing that article with some of my coworkers tomorrow, thank you

Derwood

gobbling up Judge Holden references like the slop eater i am. thanks Chris

Sheep

ok

RG13

Joe Biden will be president for another four years.

RG13

We hope Trump gets it; but he will not. People like Israel.

Xi

The use of fear-mongering on the part of the Brandon Defense Squad, instead of any positive messaging gives me some real Adam Curtis "Power of Nightmares"- vibe

David Cox

Jason Statham vs the managerial class using mundane objects around the office as weapons

Harry P. Ness

Amber is crushing in this I am thrumming

Lesley Anne Noelle

I would also be engaged if one of them was murdered via sniper. 🔻

Lesley Anne Noelle

Ron won my giggles when he failed to manage to walk in slightly chunky shoes 👞

Lesley Anne Noelle

I’m visualizing Nikki being run over by a caterpillar bulldozer in Gaza! Yaaasss, Queen yo be flattened!

William

Dude, democracy has been over for some time now - so long that people have written academic books about how it’s controlled by moneyed interests. Biden single handedly fucked over literally all railroad workers - wtf are you talking about? Dems and republicans are two sides to the same coin but cool story about saving democracy. Literally nothing has changed and most things are worse with Biden so fuck off about lesser evil shit. More people deported in Biden year 1 than trump’s 4 years. Need I say more? No matter who you vote for YOU LOSE

William

Not bashing him - he’s obviously grinding and working on his podcasting game. Respect

Nolan

Thank you user SanFranciscoGaper for calling for a ceasefire in Gaza!

Hot Rod

Beekeeper2: Son of a Bee

Jason Edmiston

Don't give away the technique. Just go listen to more Cushvlog.

Science Bitch

Great ep, just wish amber would talk over people more, really can’t get enough cross talk. If only more podcasters were unable to understand social cues

MKatieUltra

Hugh Laurie hated saying "coronary artery" as House

Jon

Reminded me of early days, where two chapos would refuse to give up on their bits and just talk simultaneously

J P 3

20% chance of re-election. If re-elected, based on actuarial tables alone, odds are about 62% (slightly better than 50-50) Biden makes it to 2028.

Poppy Chulo

You know chapo and its fans like to rip on reddit, but so many of these comments, and yours is a prime example, are reddit tier cringe.

wierd ass kkkiidd

Subbing in amber for Felix helps fill the christman sized hole, the 2 of them together somehow makes it worse

Dark Belden

Just one more vote bro, that’s all. I just need one more vote to save democracy. Just one more and this time I really mean it.

Heavenly Father69

This pod is in dire need of more energy and different content. Im shocked at how Chapo has devolved in a "Republican bad and stupid" while the only incursion onto left fuckery is simulataneously endlessly ranting about Biden/Israel. Most bullshit related to the left is somehow not a topic of interest on this show anymore. if Amber wasnt on I'd call it for Chapo. Honestly, I miss Virgil. And an update about Matt.

Tim

I need a David Ayer movie, penned by Wimmer and staring Jon Bernthal to experience true nirvana.

Jason Matthews

What sort of left fuckery do you have in mind? I can guarantee that every left sect in every church basement in the world is ranting about Biden/Israel right now. There's been a lot of antidemocratic imperial maneuvering in South America recently, with Ecuador's emergency state being the major example, but one turns to higher brow pods for these discussions.

Travis White

The name of the Never Back Down headquarters’ centerpiece puzzle was Moonlight Cabin RETREAT??

BureaucracyNow

Absolutely not true that “they didn’t even try to manufacture consent” for the Iraq War. Huh, Amber? It was hugely popular at the time, largely manufactured

Podcast subscriber 78

Yeah duh. House no talk. House big building. For sleep and jerk off.

Dan

I can feel Ambers power growing every episode

Jason Matthews

Amber needs to do a show with the Chapo wives.

Sal Paradise

She didn't come up with it. Irl up vote farming.

Mac daddy

Amber on fire in this one lol

Shane

I tried reading Caste and the writer uses a metaphor to explain everything, like pages about a meteor crash in Russia, all so you get what she means when she writes Trump was a meteor crashing into US politics. Dogshit stuff

Tyler Sutherland

"500 Miles" by The Proclaimers should have been played over a montage of Jashon Shhtathum waking up, and when the Afrikaner has that gun on him, the Afrikaner should say "When I pull this trigger, Bee Keeper, I'LL be the winner!", but then Jashun Shtafum quips, No, I'LL be!", then releases a horde of bees on the Afrikaner with Edwin McCain's "I'll Be" plays over

Vincent W Troia

yep we lose. lose less with democrats. it’s not about just biden. it’s about the entire party, and its ability to be more influenced by the progressive agenda. it’s about them not appointing extreme right wing judges to kill any vestiges of democracy we have left. and yes we have some democracy left. get over your doomer, the-world-hurt- you, self-aggrieved mindset and get involved. think local democratic party. yeah i’ll vote for biden. he’s the least worst choice because of the entire coalition that comes with him. yes he will do bad stuff. not my point at all.

Vincent W Troia

cynicism isn’t a strategy, it’s a childish reaction.

Vincent W Troia

you’re bringing your emotions into it. stop viewing politics that way.

Mubar

Will menaker voice crack at 7:16 lol

Wario Argento

Jason Statham vs. Tony Todd in BEEKEEPER 2: SUITE 2 THE SWEET

Dark Belden

I got an email yesterday from the progressive Ohio senator that was in response to me asking for the American government and Joe Biden to kill less people. The response was more or less “fuck them kids lol”. It’s local elections and ballot initiatives for me this year.

Torpedo Jones

Idk why but she's always been like this on the pod.

Natalie

They literally just gave a matt update ya silly. They have always been the poking fun at the right show. I didn't even start listening until after VT was gone and I know this

Natalie

Bluewaffle SS was CRAZY

Natalie

I think (?) she was referring the resistance against it cause she mentioned occupy wall st and stuff but I'm not sure

etienne

chapo go on chapo

William

I love how your only argument aside from “no, Trump would be worse (unprovable)” is just that, “no ur doomer”. What’s wrong? Nothing to say about how Biden’s treated unions? What about how Biden hasn’t used any executive powers to subvert the dobbs decision? Comparing the last four years to trump’s 4 years, you demonstrably lose MORE with Biden. The world and the nation are both worse off. Funny how you, the self appointed “adult” in the room, can’t fucking recognize this. But then again, the dead Russians and Ukrainians, the dead Palestinians, the deported South Americans, well, they’re not Americans so fuck em, right? Arguably it’d be better for Trump to win because then the democrats would be forced to try and protect all the shit they say they believe in. Which is exactly what happened last time

Jacob

Damn I miss Amber as a regular

Dan fisher

Wait, amber says her boyfriend started clapping, her and Matt poly or something

dshamz_

You guys missed it - the South African dude killed a beekeeper. He’s an African wasp. They kill bees. There’s your final boss 😂

Shfifty_five

Fuck Biden but it's definitely worth voting for local/state/resolutions. And as a protest vote, at least Cornell West has messaging involving disbanding NATO, slashing defense, and anti-Zionism.

Gucci Brandt

I missed and now I can’t find it. What’s the name of the puzzle? I kind of want to buy one

Anya

So nice to have Amber back

Kevin C

Protect da hive

Eric G

Bwahahah, as if Will's stammering bulldozer rants conform to Robert's rules of order.

Hardcore Virgin

Will’s trump impression is deeply fulfilling, both sexually and spiritually