Today's writing: Daring Double (Patreon)

(coming up on a deadline for a contest and I've barely begun the story)

THIS MONTH'S GOAL THUS FAR: 30,000 WORDS

THIS MONTH'S WRITING (INCLUDING TODAY): 6,883

(this really is not working out)

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(Note: Shining Armor has been given VIP pass to Con-venture, and he's the only VIP present for A. K. Yearling's exclusive meet-and-greet. But there's something off about AK...)

"Sh-sh-shining Armor!" He took the offered hoof in both of his forehooves and shook hard enough to lift the author off the floor. "Oops! Sorry!" Releasing her and steadying her until she recovered her balance, he babbled on, "I'm sorry, but I've always wanted to meet you. My mom was your editor for years! You know Twilight Velvet?"

 * * * * * *

The authoress fumbled with her glasses, which had gone askew on her muzzle and almost fallen off from the force of Shining's hoofshake. "Um? Erh? Twilight- Twilight-" She danced first on one hoof and then the other, trying to get them straight. 

"Here, let me!" Shining grasped the glasses in his magic and put them straight.

"Thank you," Yearling said, settling down for a moment. "Er, did you say Twilight?"

"Twilight Velvet, that's right, ma'am!" Shining said enthusiastically. "She's always talking about how much she enjoyed editing your early books! It made her want to go and learn wall-climbing and parasailing and-"

"Er... "

The single, unconfident syllable brought Shining's babble to an instant halt.

"... you wouldn't by any chance be related to Twilight Sparkle, would you?" 

"Um... yes?" To Shining it seemed like a really foalish question. But then, maybe Ms. Yearling didn't remember the name of the Prince Consort of the Crystal Empire. To be honest, not a lot of ponies did. 

"Y-y-you must be quite proud," Yearling continued. "Your sister- she is your sister, yes?- is such a fine young woman. She's got quite a future ahead of her, I'm sure."

"Er..." Shining could give benefit of the doubt like Pinkie Pie gave parties, but there were limits. "I suppose you could say that," he said. "Although it's kind of hard to think of anything better than being ruler of all Equestria." For the first time his face took on a hint of suspicion. "And by the way, what's a 'woman'?"

"Ah. Um... I've... been researching other cultures for my next book," Yearling said quickly. "There are different terms for mares, and I suppose one of them stuck in my head. Silly me, didn't mean to confuse or offend."

"Uh huh." Shining Armor gave Yearling a long look up and down. "How many arrows did Daring Do dodge in the temple of the Sapphire Stone?"

"One score. Twenty."

"But you describe it as a barrage-"

"Any group of missiles launched by a group of squad size or larger- twelve or so- constitutes a barrage," Yearling said, and for once she sounded confident. "But in Chapter Nine I clearly say a score of arrows, which anyone up on middle Ponish knows is twenty. I have SO many cosplayers asking me about that one because, for some reason, they think Daring Do never replaces a hat."

"How many stairs did Daring Do climb on the Pyramid of Chapultepec?" Shining Armor pressed.

"I didn't say in the text," Yearling replied. "It was over three hundred, but Daring Do loses count after about a hundred and ten because of the heat and her jungle fever."

"What was the principal design carved into the Taming Scepter in Daring Do and the Cannibal Gardens?"

"The Taming Scepter is marked by a triskelion," Yearling said.

"HA! GOT YOU!" Shining Armor jabbed a hoof at Yearling. "It was a fleur-de-lis!"

"No," Yearling said, going from confidence to irritation, "it was a triskelion. My editor at the time said nobody would know the word, so I changed it to a description of three spiraling vines with thorns at the tips like clawed paws. Which is what got printed. But the illustrator got lazy and just slapped a Fancy lily on the side of a stick with a jewel on the end- and the Scepter did NOT have a jewel, it had a polished knob, and I WROTE it that way, but the publisher refused to change it, so it went out with the inaccuracy, and you better believe the next contract and every one after that gave me approval rights for all cover art and interior illustrations so THAT would never happen again!" A now furious Yearling stamped the floor with a forehoof... with the side of her hoof, rather, and she flinched from the sting of pain.

Shining Armor had begun stepping backwards about halfway through the rant. "Um, I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I didn't mean to upset you."

Yearling took a deep breath. "No, that's quite all right," she said. "It's just that accuracy is extremely important to me. It's rather a touchy subject-"

"Not for- well, yes, for that too, I didn't know about the story behind the cover art," Shining babbled. Shaking his head to get it clear, he forced himself back on topic. "But for a moment I was afraid you were some kind of imposter."

Under her hat and glasses, Yearling's face went pale. "I-i-imposter?" she asked.

"I'm afraid so," Shining said. "It's not fair to you, but having a changeling impersonate my wife-to-be and almost conquer all of Equestria... well, it left kind of an unfortunate impression."

"Conquer all of Equestria?" Yearling asked.

Now Shining's eyebrows rose again. "Um, yes? Years ago? You can't have missed it. It was in all the papers and-"

At that point the floor just behind Shining Armor exploded upwards, scattering his piles of to-be-autographed books around the room. Up through the hole rose the head and neck of a giant orange snake, body thicker around than a pony was tall. Slit-pupiled eyes ringed in green glared down at the handful of ponies, then focusing on one particular figure.

"YOU," the giant snake hissed, glaring directly at A. K. Yearling. 

Behind her glasses, the writer's eyes went as wide as a pony's eyes could go. Her jaw gaped open as if the muscles had been cut loose. She lurched up onto her hind legs, tumbled backwards, and fell into a heap next to the small panel stage.

"AT LAST I HAVE YOU!"  The huge snake head drew back, ready to strike.

In an instant Shining Armor stood in front of Yearling. A flare of magic brought up a shield bubble over the two of them just before the snake's head rammed into it. The shield held fast, but the snake flopped over onto the floor, temporarily stunned. 

"Come on!" Shining Armor shouted, dropping the shield and lifting A. K. Yearling back to her hooves.  "Let's get you out of here before it comes to!"

"What IS that??" Yearling asked. "I've never seen-"

"Questions later!" Shining said. "First we get you to safety!"

"But-" 

A loud hiss cut off A. K. Yearling's protest. The giant snake had raised its head up again, and Shining threw another magic shield in its way. This time the snake weaved its head back and forth, looking for an opening or a way around the shield rather than ramming straight into it. 

"Just keep moving!" Shining Armor shouted, pulling the shield in from a bubble to a smaller circle that he bobbed back and forth to match the snake's movement. Keeping himself between Yearling and the giant reptile he backed towards the panel room door.

Just before the two of them reached the door, Shining Armor waved a hoof at the moderator back by the stage, who had stood with Yearling's handler, totally ignored, while the snake kept trying to strike. "Excuse me!" Shining said. "If you don't mind, could you keep an eye on my books? Thanks!"

Then, with a shove that made Yearling squeal in protest, he dropped the shield and pushed the two of them through the door, slamming it behind them.