a closer look: your July demo 'regret/me instead' (Patreon)

HEY Y’ALL. I’m a little late but wanted to throw the spotlight back on your July demo and give you a lil more background on it! 

As an indecisive, easily swayed soul regretting things is just in my nature. For example I’m moving house soon, and despite it being a no brainer (the flat I’m moving to is gorgeous and I’m moving in with my best friend) but as soon as I made the choice my head was like NO NOOOOO NOOOOO ORLAAAAAA !! WHYYOUDOTHIS? It goes beyond reason, it cannot be rationed with. It’s just something my brain loves to do. Forever looking back on situations with rose tinted glasses, you feel me?

This is a song I wrote about an ex (top tip - don’t date a songwriter unless you definitely want a song written about you at some point..!). I broke it off and managed to remain good friends, but every time he spoke about new girls he was seeing I felt all squirmy and odd. NO ORLA. WHAT HAVE YOU DOOOOOOOONE.

I wrote the first verse of this song first, and had it in my mind for a couple weeks before making it into anything longer. I produced a lot of it at home and some at my friend Steph’s studio.. she’s got some awesome synths that we got on there (shoutout to the Juno 106). I wanted the song to feel light and dinky (referencing artists like Julia Michaels) so that the heaviness was coming from the lyrics, not the track. That kind of contrast is something I’m really loving lately. 

Hope you enjoyed this! As always stream away on here and download the mp3 for yourself. :)

Lyrics:

how does it feel when your tongue hits her tongue?

does it shake your whole body like a bass drum?

I don’t even wanna hear about last night

I’m just asking to be nice

haven’t seen you in weeks and you seem great

did i make a big mistake?

I don’t know if I can be your friend

pre1:

I know I say im fine

but i’ve been thinking all time

Chorus:

I feel

Regret

every single time i look at you

every other second of the day 

I’m counting up my mistakes

And I forget

Why I ran away in the first place

can’t believe the mess I’ve made 

I feel regret

Can’t remember why i wanted to

just be 23 and run away

i don’t know if i can be your friend

when i was it was me instead

V2

We’re such a stereotypical romance

Dreamers caught up in their own dance

We went our different ways because we could

I guess we were too good

Does your face light up when she calls you?

does she make you feel happy like i used to?

I don’t know if I can be your friend

(Chorus)