Books that have saved us....let's discuss. (And the new podcast with Clare Bowditch). (Patreon)

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Hallo loves,

QUCK START KIT:

HERE'S the new podcast episode with Melbourne musician Clare Bowditch.
HERE'S the patreon-only link to talk about books that have changed your brain on the shadowbox.
HERE'S the place to RSVP and leave questions for my patron-only live follow-up chat with Clare.

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Greetings from Waiheke....where I am feeling fragile, sad, lonely and overwhelmed...and just attended my first zoom funeral. 

Things here remain disorienting and hard. I just made a new friend...and he got into a bad bike accident and is in the hospital. I bought an electric bike to take Ash to school in....and it promptly shit the bed. I was just getting good at karoake....and I got scolded by the people at the bowling club for performing with no shoes (evenyone else was in flip-flops, and this is new zealand...? I almost cried). Ash is in a new school....but he's shy and a little scared. Everything is new...and we're working on it. Everything is sort of, well, under construction. inside and out. 

I am all too well aware of the luxury of my non-covid-world problems. school, karaoke...this must sound like another world (it is) to someone living in lockdown. and yet; life remains what it always was...a panopoly of problems to be solved every day. 

And I'm homesick, still, for a place I recognize less and less by the day. (This list of businesses that have shuttered in Cambridge, my old hometown, made me almost break down weeping. The People's Republik. Cafe Pamplona. Dickson's Hardware. And on and on.)

So?

SO....it's never good time to talk about books that have saved us while we are in the depths of existential confusion. 

Some happy podcast news, too: the podcast has just hit over 200,000 downloads! THAT'S A FUCKING LOT!!!!! So thank you to all of you who are listening, sharing, commenting, rating and reviewing. whatever you're doing, it's WORKING.

Let's DO THIS WEEK’S “THE ART OF ASKING EVERYTHING” PODCAST, NOW OUT. It's called “Putting Hope Into The World” with musician & writer Clare Bowditch, from Melbourne, Australia. 

Here it is on my website...

....AND YOU CAN CLICK HERE FOR A LIST OF PLACES TO LISTEN:
https://linktr.ee/AskingEverything

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ALSO IMPORTANT, COMING UP FOR PATRONS ONLY:

OUR PATRON-ONLY CROWDCAST CHAT/Q&A with me and Clare Bowditch (this week's guest) is happening on SUNDAY,  FEBRUARY 21st starting at 10pm ET New York time! (that's Monday, Feb 22nd at 2pm in Melbourne for Clare and 4pm in NZ for me). it's not the usual few days after the podcast....clare was busy this week.

COME ask us anything. You can log in NOW to RSVP and start leaving good questions in the feed. Please upvote questions you like! These have been amazing and Clare and I will will probably not be able to stop cracking each other up or making each other cry, that seems to be the drill:

If you click on this link, the page will show you the start time IN YOUR TIME ZONE.

https://www.crowdcast.io/e/aoae-ep20 

you'll need to log into patreon to access this webcast as it's patron-only.

as always.....the live cast Q&A will be recorded and you can always view the archive recording at the same link above, any time after the live stream ends. the live stream is for patrons-only, and the recorded archive is usually made public afterwards so feel free to share it...

...

AND NOW....MORE ON THE EPISODE.

Books, Bereavement and Breaking Down.

(from the podcast description on the website:)

Reading is an empathy factory. When I read Australian singer-songwriter Clare Bowditch's memoir, "Your Own Kind of Girl", I related deeply to her struggles with insecurity, self-worth and sanity. We had so much in common it was uncanny, like finding an accidental lost twin sibling through a bookshop. Join us as we talk (and laugh, and cry) about owning your own self-doubt and self-hatred, how books can actually change your life, the emotional cost of telling your own true story....and more.

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I've been thinking a lot lately about books and art as savoir.

Many of you watched me do the "there will be no intermission" extravaganza on stage in 2019 (there were over 100,000 people at my shows, so i know SOME of you were there). I thought I was out of the fire.

I thought that be being that honest, by facing my demons that candidly, talking THAT openly about assault and reproductive confusion and by singing LET IT GO after my brutal miscarriage story....I'd be done. DONE! Done, y'know, growing for a while.

How fucking wrong was I? Very wrong, eh. Out of the frying pan of that whirlwind tour and into the fire of mothering a young child without my partner....in a pandemic in a foreign country, with no prediction. It was - and still kinda of is - the hardest year of my life. It's been almost a year since I got here. 

And one of the things that happened in this past year -taking me completely by surprise - was that i started suffering panic attacks for the first time since my teens.

And....I've also learned a lot about how to cope. And I found something out, as I was searching for home remedies during lockdown, as I woke in a cold sweat unable to think straight or breathe, as i lay there shaking in bed waiting for the moment to pleace let me go. I found that playing music to myself in my head (strangely, "the blue danube" seemed to work to banish obsessive thoughts) could soothe the demons away. And...reading. Especially reading books that were old and familiar to me. So I went and hunted down the most comforting things I could find.

Books, memoirs especially, and the difficult stories told within them, have saved me many times. They have provided a toolkit,m and made me feel far less alone, and far less crazy than I am often tempted to feel.

Books have been one of the only reliable medicines that have kept me consistently sane and grounded over the last twenty years.

That all on the deck, me and kelly welles, my new editorial partner (she wrote that amazing piece about madison young last week as a supplement to the podcast), were discussing how important it is right now to make a space for people to share the stuff that is saving them the way clare and i were talking about books SAVING US.

So we figured that, using my conversation with Clare about HER book and MY book ("The Art of Asking"), we would kick off a conversation about books that have saved us....and ask you....and we reached out to all of team AFP to make a LIST. And we've made a thread on the shadowbox to get everybody sharing. That's below, keep reading.

Here's me in the studio, about to talk to Clare, and clutching her incredible memoir, "Your Own Kind of Girl"....

And here, here is a about HALF of the collection of books that I've bought, found, ordered, or been giving since getting to these shores and getting here a year ago:

So what book changed your life? Gave you a totally new perspective? A burst of very needed self-confidence? Helped you realize you weren’t alone in the world after all? 

Everyone here on Team AFP are big readers....so let's ball rolling with their choices....AND YOU, you all.....start thinking, and then please weigh in here on the comments, or for a deeper dive and more robust discussion, go to the shadowbox. 

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Amanda Palmer, Head Weirdo and Artist in Chief

I've read a lot of books that have really changed my life, and it's hard to narrow down, but given it's a pandemic, these are the two that I think would be most helpful in life triage:

Daring Greatly by Brené Brown

If you don't already know Brene's work, or seen her TED talk(s), you're in for an awakeneing. She writes from an academic but also VERY human perspective about how vulnerability is a huge strength, and how loss and grief and pain really shape and break us wide open to be, well, better. If you liked the message of my touring show, this book will speak to you on every fucking page. It's a very easy read...and there's no human I wouldn't recommend it to. This book was clutched to my chest when I went into get an abortion. I read it to remind myself of my own inner bravery. I'll leave it at that.

Why Buddhism is True by Robert Wright.

I'm halfway into this book, and I've already recommended it to every friend I have and even ordered and gifted a copy of it to a friend in New York who's struggling in lockdown with her own kid and crazy situation. A few nights ago, I was unable to sleep, and this book reminded me about the power of the mind...and how spiraling thoughts are not that hard to control once you can step out. And to step out: you need to practice stepping out. That's why we meditate. It's an AMAZING introduction to the concepts of mindfulness or meditation for someone who is totally allergic to the "woo" factor; it's written by an evolutionary psychologist who really knows his shit and decided that even though her theoretically had gotten to the bottom of Knowledge, he was still deeply unhappy. So he went on a meditation retreat and got his brain blown open. I cannot make you read this book....but I wanna make everyone read this book. It will, I promise you, change the way you think about the WAY you think. 

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Alex, UK Merch Queen, Team AFP

The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky - I found this book as an introverted 15 year old who didn't really talk much to anybody, and I found comfort and solace in reading about a character was very introspective, thought a lot about the minutiae of human interaction and teenage relationships, and was nurtured and developed by books, music, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and eventually learns that maybe it is sometimes better to join in than stand on the outskirts.

A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket - What started out as a very simplistic children's book filled with archetypal 'good' and 'bad' characters developed over the course of 13 books into a layered and convoluted mystery, pulling into question these notions of archetypal good and bad characters. By the time I read the final book as a 13 year old, the overriding theme that has stayed with me (and is now immortalised in a tattoo of an eye on my ankle) is that nobody in the world is truly good, or truly bad; the lines become blurred, and ultimately all we can do is try to be "noble enough."

{huge plus one from me on "perks"...i found it hugely moving. and i am ashamed to say i haven't read the "series" books, even though daniel handler played accordion at my weeding. i'll need to read them to ash....-AFP}

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Jordan Verzar, Manager, Team AFP

The Frank Book, by Jim Woodring - This book changed me on many deep and long lasting levels. Firstly, never had I thought I could be so profoundly and viscerally affected by a book with NO TEXT. Woodring considers himself a cartoonist and he tells some downright complex and multi-interpretive storylines with his masterful illustrations and without using the written word. He's a master artisan and one of the worlds greatest surrealists, living or dead. In life there are sometimes pivotal moments where you can draw a straight line of chain reactions of how you got from one point to the other... The story is long and true for me in the case of Jim Woodring and his work. In fact I can draw a straight line of cause and effect from this books influence on me, to my work with Amanda and writing these words today. Jim Woodring's work has inspired me personally and creatively and in turn changed the course of my work life and career. I owe Jim Woodring a debt of gratitude which I continue to try to repay whenever I have the opportunity to do so.

Perfume by Patrick Suskind - This brilliant book changed my life because it made me overly aware of my sense of smell! After devouring the book twice in my late teens, I walked around paying close attention to every scent, every odour, good or bad. It really made me aware that there's a lot more to smell in this world once you start paying close attention to it.

{that's a plus one from me on "perfume"....one of the only books i've read in the orginal german. it was so, so, so goddamn good. - AFP}

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Hayley, Ghost In The Machine, Patronator, Team AFP

Choke by Chuck Palahniuk - I think this was the first Palahniuk book that I read in high school and lead to me devouring everything else he had written at the time. It opened the doors and  showed me that books could be more than school work, that reading could be enjoyable, especially at my own pace and at my own selection. Palahniuk's books showed me that fiction could be funny and dark and sarcastic and cynical, they could paint pictures in your head, and when they become moving pictures on the big screen, you can get a special kind of enjoyment some how makes you treasure and appreciate the book in new and different ways.

Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie - Sometimes you read something at just the right time in your life. I read this a few years ago and found it to be so beautiful, so important, and such a good read. I couldn't put it down, and I appreciate everything I learned and gained from reading it.

{i'd just started reading Americanah when I left NY last year, and the book's still by my old nightstand. it was a great read for the first 40 pages....time to re-order....-AFP}
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Michael McComiskey, Assistant, Team AFP

Hey, Joe by Ben Neihart - This book is a coming of age story of a 16 year old gay young man in New Orleans.  It was the first time as a young queer that I read a character and thought “Holy shit, someone else has these thoughts?  Feels these things?  Sees the world in this way?”  Even though the story itself isn’t all that wonderful and it takes place in New Orleans and I grew up in New England, being able to see aspects of myself that I was still trying to come to terms with in a book completely changed my world.

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Kelly Welles, Editorial Assistant, Socials & British Faffer, Team AFP

Ripley Under Ground by Patricia Highsmith - Fell into my lap (almost literally) when I was seventeen or eighteen). As an aspiring writer with a penchant for crime fiction, this was the first book that showed me how a clever storyteller can create a loathsome, yet sympathetic character. It’s come in really handy.

She Came To Stay by Simone de Beauvoir - Not long after that, I read She Came To Stay and learned what women writing women could feel like. The rawness, the self-destruction, the febrile, fidgety highs and lows. It felt like home and I’m really happy to have lived here ever since.

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Fannie Cohen, Podcast Producer & Magician

Pirates and Farmers by Dave Hickey - A book of essays about the marriage of art, commerce and democracy. But this isn't some dry academic text. He's a renegade who writes about art so passionately, and with such command of his own style, that it's hard to walk away without taking a it of that swagger with you.

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We’ll also be asking this question over the usual social media channels this week and pointing people to this post....so keep an eye out and share that if you can. 

Again, you can comment here if you're happy to, OR better, join the conversation on The Shadowbox. Team AFP will be keeping an eye on your responses and if a book has resonated* with a lot of you, we’ll talk more about it.

*For the purposes of clarity in this otherwise highly unscientific survey, we’re excluding ‘The Art of Asking’ as a choice. The surveyed demographic has been identified as potentially biased in favor of the author :) Ha. 

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MORE ABOUT CLARE.

photo by Anna Robinson

Clare Bowditch is a beloved ARIA Award Winning Musician, Logie Nominated actor (Offspring), and one of Australia's most respected, over-booked public speakers (on topics of modern mental health, big-hearted business, all things "Being Woman"). Clare has been Rolling Stone Woman of the Year (Contribution to Culture) and been invited to tour with some of the absolute greats (Leonard Cohen, Gotye, Cat Power).

Although she has written songs since she was three, Clare only became "serious" about music around the time we became parents to our only daughter (when we were 27).  We now have three children - our (now) teenage girl and two tween-age boys  (who happen to be...identical twins). 

Clare's first book ' Your Own Kind of Girl' is out now via Allen & Unwin.

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THE PODCAST ITSELF - HOW TO LISTEN:

....audio for all of the podcast episodes are embedded on my website, including today's episode: http://amandapalmer.net/podcast

OR....

go here, select the podcast venue of your choice (i.e. apple podcasts), and click on the most recent episode.

https://linktr.ee/AskingEverything

and it's FREE, and AD-FREE!

BECAUSE PATRONAGE!

WE THANK YOU.

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SHOW NOTES:

The Art of Asking Everything
Clare Bowditch: Putting Hope Into The World

Twitter:
@ClareBowditch 

Website:
https://clarebowditch.com

Big Hearted Business:
https://www.facebook.com/bigheartedbusiness

Get the book HERE:

https://www.allenandunwin.com/browse/books/other-books/Your-Own-Kind-of-Girl-Clare-Bowditch-9781760528959

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THE EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:

We've attached a pdf of the transcript of the podcast the patreon post. To view it, you can download it by visiting this patreon post on the web, if you ain't there already. (it's a hyperlink at the very bottom of the post with a little paper clip attachment symbol next to it....you'll see it). THANKS ALEX!!!!!

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PODCAST CREDITS:

Thanks, of course, to my guest Clare Bowditch, check out her music, book, and other things at clarebowditch.com

Our interview was recorded by Nick Edin at Sing Sing Studios in Melbourne, Australia.

For all the music you heard in this episode, you can go to the new, improved amandapalmer.net/podcast.

This podcast was produced by FannieCo.

Lots of thanks, as usual, to my amazing team. Hayley Rosenblum, Michael McComiskey, Alex Knight, Jordan Verzar, and introducing Kelly Welles, who’s been helping me newly on the social medias.

And last but not least, this whole podcast would not be possible without patronage. Like I said at the beginning, this keeps us ad-free, sponsor-free, endorsement-free, weird-corporate-podcast-world-free, so please, if you’re not already backing, come in, it’s a dollar a month, and just having you there, and knowing that your support is there, means the world to me.

And special thanks to my high level patrons: Simon Oliver, St. Alexander, Birdie Black, Ruth Ann Harnisch, Leela Cosgrove, Robert W. Perkins. Thank you, all of you, whether you’re in for a dollar, or more, for helping me make this podcast.

Things are going to evolve over the next couple of weeks and months, so stick around, and see what happens, I’ve got some really exciting guests coming up in the next while. So, so, so excited!

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THANK YOU TO ALL YOU PATRONS, FOR SUPPORTING THIS PODCAST.

This whole undertaking would not be possible, in this manner, without patronage. At current count, there are about 14,000 of you.

YOU make it possible for this podcast to have no ads, no sponsors, no censorship, no bullshit, we are just the media, doing what we do.

Because of you....

No ads!

No sponsors!

No exclusive deal with any corporations!!!!

No censorship!!!!!!!

NO....TIMELINE!!!!!!!!!!! :)

We.

Are.

The.

Media.

I love you all.

See you soon.

x

a

------THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS---------

1. if you’re a patron, please click through to comment on this post. at the very least, if you’ve read it, indicate that by using the heart symbol. that's always nice for me to see, so i know who's reading.

2. see All the Things (over 100 of them) i've made so far on patreon:

http://amandapalmer.net/things

3. JOIN THE SHADOWBOX COMMUNITY FORUM, find your people, and discuss everything: https://forum.theshadowbox.net/

4. new to my music and TOTALLY OVERWHELMED? TAKE A WALK THROUGH AMANDALANDA….we made a basic list of my greatest hits n stuff (at least up until a few years ago, this desperately needs updating) on this lovely page: http://amandalanda.amandapalmer.net/

5. general AFP/patreon-related questions? ask away, someone will answer: patronhelp@amandapalmer.net