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Good Morning my darlings.

I have all sorts of news to drop on you (mostly about the exciting upcoming Dolls tour - we just announced Orlando and Santa Fe on top of Denver) but I’ll get to that later today or tomorrow.

I wanted to just send you all a quote and a loving reminder. Also just posted it up to the socials.

A friend just sent me an advance copy of their fragile memoir. A soul-baring. And this is the quote that opens the book.

Here is the world.

Beautiful and terrible things will happen.

Don't be afraid.

- Frederick Buchner

I feel this sentiment in my core today. I have seen, heard, been privy to so much darkness lately. I feel honored to stand near it, but also see - laid bare, more than I ever have - the unfathomable and sometimes unbearable wounds of trauma. The depths. The seemingly unhealable.

A reminder: you may not feel healable, but I have seen miracles.

I have held space lately with people who have raped and murdered and who have found some kind of path to reconciliation.

I have held space with people who have survived childhood sexual abuse and I have watched as they flourished and made art in the face of the unthinkable.

There is not always a happy ending. There is not always immediate company. There are terrifying roads.

Those souls you love deeply may not find the handle to the door out of their own dark. You must keep going.

Here is the world.

My love: you have this choice to make, each and every day.

You have this choice to make, now.

It does not matter what has happened to you, what you have fucked up, who has betrayed you, what may have hurt long ago or yesterday, what story is now behind you: here is the world.

Here is the world.

Beautiful and terrible things will continue to happen.

Take my hand.

Do not be afraid.

(I can’t wait to read this book. Reports later).

Reading comments for the next hour or so.

♥️

Afp

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Comments

Jessica Demcsak

Lovely to see first thing in the morning. Helps me get into the right mindset to teach art to 9-12th grade kiddos 🖤

Angel Rosen

"There is not always a happy ending. There is not always immediate company. There are terrifying roads." ❤️ I needed this, and you, at this hour. My heart hurts the worst in the early mornings, when the people I love are still sleeping, and I feel the most unaccompanied. The dark gets big around me until there's someone to accept my love.

Dominika Hannath

“Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery it is. In the boredom and pain of it, no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it, because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.” ― Frederick Buechner

amandapalmer

All moments are key moments. This right here. So beautiful. Including typing into this little box to you. Have a beautiful day Dominika. xxxx

Linda

Love this ♥️

Erin C

This is from the Book of Forgiving by Mpho Tutu and her father Bishop Tutu. It feels like it fits here. Reading the book now I’m confronting the hurts of the past and the ways I’ve hurt others. And I come across beautiful writing like this that says, “I matter. I’m strong. I’m beautiful.” I will forgive you The words are so small But there is a universe hidden in them When I forgive you All those cords of resentment, pain, and sadness that had wrapped themselves around my heart will be gone When I forgive you You will no longer define me You measured me and assessed me and decided you could hurt me I didn’t count But I will forgive you Because I do count I do matter I am bigger than the image you have of me I am stronger I am more beautiful And I am infinitely more precious than you thought me I will forgive you My forgiveness is not a gift I am giving you When I forgive you My forgiveness will be a gift that gives itself to me

Debz michaela

Resonates. Sometimes I feel swallowed inside my own mind and the trauma it’s undergone. But all that has shaped me into who I am today, and that person is reading Sophie Strand’s book (thanks for the infoAFP!), Nick Cave’s recent Faith Hope&Carnage, and Raynor Winn’s beautiful evocative memoir of a long walk that saved her husband. And these things (and more) offer hands in the darkness that I gratefully accept. Lots of love to you all 💜

Damian Masterson

Tonally different, but what it reminds me of the Vonnegut baptismal quote from God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater: “Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It’s round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you’ve got a hundred years here. There’s only one rule that I know of, babies-‘God damn it, you’ve got to be kind.’”

Ellen Moreau

Thank you so much for holding my hand. There are so many stories I could tell you, so much darkness I could reflect on, but the simple act of taking your hand warms my heart. Thank you Amanda.

Kayla

Thank you❤

Sahrami

Tearing up a bit. Ive longed to forgive for so long, but who could hurt a little kid? Seems like a lot of people. i feel the trauma drowning me. i know its the forgiveness that'll set me free. getting there. Thanks for this amanda i love you xx

T Nonya

Thank you. As I head out the door to another physically taxing day in construction, with a coworker who thinks that being nice gets you nowhere, in a project that is out of my wheelhouse... I'll aim not to be afraid. The imposter syndrome has been strong lately.

amandapalmer

I’ve been having some really interesting conversations about forgiveness with my friends lately. Especially those who have survived child abuse. There’s a lot to say. I’m going to be leading some conversations this fall, and probably working on a book, that tries to get in there. x

Schmeecosis

For a little bit, I would like to sink into the ground and have my bones consumed by moss. Then maybe all the ash from the bridges I burned to make it out alive, could nourish whatevers growing from the moss and the bones. It's funny, the thing that scares me most right now is learning the bus route for my new job, despite having taken the busses out in the Boston area all my life. But something thts been carrying me through is a quote from someone I was outpatient with- Do It Scared.

Tracey Stokes

You get it. I Love you too. To all here. Much Love.

Jen

❤️❤️❤️

Suzanne

Good morning my lovely. It is always fabulous to wake up to a message from you. This morning I have a check-up with my doctor, then I go to work where we have the meeting with our upper level management this afternoon from corporate (quarterly partnership thing with the host hospital). That's AFTER I do an update that should fix things for our users on our nurse call systems that's been a problem for months. So it's kind of a big day. Oh, and I joined a fitness center by our house at the local high school so we can hopefully get this meat sack back in line. Also, my husband and I will be bringing Miss Angel to the shows in PA and Boston. There is so much. I took next week off work just to pull myself together. Because while things are okay at the moment, the last couple months have been insanity. Last few months? Pretty much forever is insanity it seems. Oh well.

Suzanne

Also... This year is the Year Of Concerts. Aside from yours, we're going to see Under the Rug in Detroit, and Postmodern Jukebox here in town, and I'm watching to see who else is performing in places accessible to me.

Cait Agosta

Thank you Amanda, The meaning in this Quote has become such a theme for me. After the relatively recent sudden deaths of my son and my wife, i think I’m learning to not put so much power into the Fear. Maybe it’s replaced by numbness; yet there truly is so much beauty and so much that is absolutely terrible. Thank you for this post this morning. Grateful for you in this world.

Rebecca Ryan

I deleted my comment when it went to the public. Fragile being I must be..I don’t know. I get it though x

Jen Beeeee

I felt this deeply. Sinking into the ground where it’s cool and innocuously visible sounds good.

Tamara

Omg, Orlando!

Gaba Kulka

Thank you for sharing this quote and this thought. A thought occured to me alongside it: The immensity of trauma around us may lead us to silence and dismiss our own pain. We keep comparing. We've been taught (time, and time, and time again, in various shades of good and bad will) that "others have it worse" is a good enough reason to treat ourselves without compassion. I say this because the pain out there is ocean-sized. It's overwhelming, and may lead us to think that what we see as our own little pond of misery is not worth mentioning. I say this because I need to hear this. If you don't have compassion for your own little pond of misery, you won't have it in any sufficient amount for the ocean of it, outside. Love you. Many hugs.

Sparklewomb

On point as always. I'm sitting at my desk having a quiet inside cry. I work with the homeless and have heard some difficult stories. I just heard one and it hurt my brain. I offer support to people who have done some terrible things. Most of the time I forget their past and deal with the now, but sometimes things come up and I feel so conflicted, offering this support and positive regard to those who have committed acts that some may see as unforgivable. Thank you for reminding me about redemption and compassion.

Sparklewomb

Me too. Going back to the earth and becoming mushrooms. I always think of a supervolcano exploding and wiping us all out. Only for the Ash to settle and the earth to be more fertile than it has ever been

EmVT

Hi friend, I know you will conquer your meeting today, and all the things! Sending good thoughts your way, and a little luck 💜

Skyeanna Malito

"A reminder: you may not feel healable, but I have seen miracles." This hit me so hard. I need a poster or a shirt or a mug or something with this on it.

Brian Fitzgerald

It reminds me of one my favorite poets, James Wright, a piece he did that closes (from memory): And so I come to seek your bed And lay my careful, quiet ear Among the nestings of your hair Against your tenuous, fragile head And hear the birds beneath your eyes Stirring for birth, and know the world Immeasurably alive and good Though bare as rifted paradise.

Jann

I feel this so much. Thank you! The key to living is to remember we always have that choice. xoxo

Kristin Ryan

I needed this reminder so much. Thank you. I love you. 💜

EmVT

Thank you for all of this Amanda, for making a space, here, for thoughts like "here is the world" and "now" and "you may not feel healable" and everything. I'm both inspired and comforted by your words and what others here have said, because healing is multifaceted--equal parts medicine, surgery, patience, introspection, articulation. May all who see this encounter every aspect of what they need to 'find the handle'. Pain does not magically lessen with time but things that can't be conceived all at once through willpower alone, one day will arise. By saying 'here is the world' it's everything--because not many people are willing to say it, and without it, an essential piece of the puzzle is always missing. I love you, thank you for all you do. have a wonderful day everyone, you are never alone! xo

Laura Wellner

Yes, this is the perfect quote...so fucking true. I've been struggling lately, but I'm handling it. I have sometimes yelled out, "STOP, just stop!" I then assure myself that "what's done is done, it's over, go forward." I pick a thing to do and focus on that, leaving behind the endless list of bullshit, the fears, the heartaches, and all the shit I can do nothing about. I have no regrets. Love & hugs!

Julie B.

Was asked yesterday if I can move past something that hurt me deploy. I think I can. Thanks for the inspiration.

Julian - Fox Spirit Design

I think I needed to hear this today. It’s all so much sometimes, and here we are still slogging through trying to make a life worth living in the midst of it all. I feel like I’ve been struggling just to stay above water for years and years now, and yet somehow I’m still the optimist in the room, the one who can’t help seeing the beauty, the potential, the humanity in everyone I meet, every moment that passes. I’m an incurable optimist, which makes the spells of depression when it all weighs so heavy even stranger to bear up through. I’m doing my best to keep swimming. Thanks for being here and always sharing so openly about your own process and thoughts and feelings. It helps to know I’m not alone, even when I’m the only one in the room in a tiny cabin in the woods far from other humans.

Coila

Thank you. ♥️

Lynn Robinson

Thank you Amanda - a beautiful reminder for us all. Feel this very deeply at the moment 🤗❤️

Cate Whitehead

Thank you Amanda. What powerful words - and images. It's 3 am and I haven't been able to get to sleep. Now I know why. Had to read this. And I have to share this with one very, she-thought-unhealable person. xx

Sahrami

Really looking forward to the book and the discussion, thank you amanda for opening spaces for such important topics as painful as they might be.

Sahrami

💖💖💖 sending so much love and hope to you Skyeanna! I see you x

Ashleigh M. Ferreira-Bartlett

Thank you. Needed this. Sometimes I think the world is too ugly and I am too soft. Sometimes I think I really was broken in childhood and I only stumble through life as a patchwork mosaic of pain, kind of a broken adult, and I'm not doing a great job of it. I've been having trouble making art, but I did write something last night- romanticized bullshit, but I knew what it was. Thanks again. You always seem to know when we need you.

Kaleigh

“Those souls you love deeply may not find the handle to the door out of their own dark. You must keep going.“ this line brought me to tears… beautifully said.. thank you for this. Sending love ❤️❤️❤️

Suzanne

The things got fixed. My checkup went well. Meetings apparently went well. One more meeting I'll pay half attention to, and then I can call it a day. And the new Orientees are a good bunch. One offered me a muffin when I was fixing something in the room this morning, and others have said they'll try to remind me to eat when they're working if I'm here.

Karin White

Thank you for the gift of your insight today. Very timely. ♥️

Grace Beaster

Such comfort to wake up to. Ngā mihi nui.

Grace Beaster

Please let me carry a cup of your sorrow for you. Perhaps it might lighten your load.

Mollie Isaacks

This resonates deeply as I continue my own post-traumatic healing journey. Traumas makes us feel like we’re back in it every time it comes up, even if the original trauma happened decades ago. Learning to ask “what’s happening right now?” and working on mindfulness and being present has been part of my healing along with therapy, coaching, and reconnecting to my body and feeling physical experiences and emotions again. Thank you for everything you do, especially to talk about the hard things. ❤️

Randi Davis

I’ve had this comment box open to respond for a while now and can’t get my thoughts together on it. I’m very lost and very hurt right now. And just knowing these things end and don’t last forever is comforting. Thank you. ❤️

Mary Loftus

One of my top two favorite quotes. The other is Mary Oliver, What will you do with your one wild and precious life?

Sally

Feeling a tad emotional right now and that just made me teary. Thank you for sharing with us.

VitAnyaNaked

<p style="color: #008600;">You know, I used to think that life is absolutely not fair. I did not understand why there is so much evil, suffering, grief in life. However, over time, I began to think differently. We will not understand what happiness is without experiencing grief or need, we will not know what is beautiful if we do not see the ugly ..</p>

Arthur Kornitsky

We are all resilient beings. I love this quote: “People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.”

And Steiner

I'm working on the "Don't be afraid." part myself. Currently this part of my version of this poem would read: "I'm am fucking terrified out of my fucking mind." If anyone needs a cheer up; During the last webcast Amanda had I suggested the name of an album could be "Traumaland" and someone else suddenly suggested the name of one of the songs could be "Traumalamadingdong". Well, my friends, Traumalamadingdong is now an officially released song made by my dearest friend Mama Joy Rising. Enjoy: https://mamajoyrising.bandcamp.com/track/traumalamadingdong?search_page_id=2472480531&search_sig=9b96fb5ea4ca3760e1dd27d4b38686eb. 💜💙💚💜💙💚💜💙♥️🖤🤎💜💜💜

And Steiner

I'd like to present one of my tools in my path to healing from abuse in childhood. Changed my life. Check out ASCAsupport.org if you want to know more or participate in meetings; ©2022 THE MORRIS CENTER. ascasupport.org ASCA Stages and Steps Stage One: Remembering 1. I am in a breakthrough crisis, having gained some sense of my abuse. 2. I have determined that I was physically, sexually or emotionally abused as a child. 3. I have made a commitment to recovery from my childhood abuse. 4. I shall re-experience each set of memories as they surface in my mind. 5. I accept that I was powerless over my abusers’ actions which holds THEM responsible. 6. I can respect my shame and anger as a consequence of my abuse, but shall try not to turn it against myself or others. 7. I can sense my inner child whose efforts to survive now can be appreciated. Stage Two: Mourning 8. I have made an inventory of the problem areas in my adult life. 9. I have identified the parts of myself connected to self-sabotage. 10. I can control my anger and find healthy outlets for my aggression. 11. I can identify faulty beliefs and distorted perceptions in myself and others. 12. I am facing my shame and developing self-compassion. 13. I accept that I have the right to be who I want to be and live the way I want to live. 14. I am able to grieve my childhood and mourn the loss of those who failed me. Stage Three: Healing 15. I am entitled to take the initiative to share in life’s riches. 16. I am strengthening the healthy parts of myself, adding to my self-esteem. 17. I can make necessary changes in my behavior and relationships at home and work. 18. I have resolved the abuse with my offenders to the extent acceptable to me. 19. I hold my own meaning about the abuse that releases me from the legacy of the past. 20. I see myself as a thriver in all aspects of life — love, work, parenting, and play. 21. I am resolved in the reunion of my new self and eternal soul

Rebecca Brisbin

“ Those souls you love deeply may not find the handle to the door out of their own dark. You must keep going.” This hit so fucking hard. I promise I will. My therapist told me a couple months back that she thinks I’ve reached a point in my life where it doesn’t matter who stays or goes, I’m on my path and not letting my relationships hold me back. Big loves to you and everyone this resonated with.

And Steiner

If anyone has questions or wants to know how to get into a meeting let me know. 💙

NakedSunFlower

Yes, I can not agree with these words. Beautiful and terrible things seem to continue to continue, this is the essence of our life.

Joanna Lindblad

We all make mistakes. The important thing is to learn and grow from them. To open ourselves to forgiveness and understanding. To help one another. If we do so, we will never be alone. Kindness to ourselves and others is a habit that should never be broken 🙏 (((❤️)))

Jen Kiaba

There is not always immediate company…oh I feel this. I grew up in a cult and escaped a forced arranged marriage and the path towards healing is a lonely one because it’s hard to find healthy community with that particular shape of scar. But…the path is worth it. I’ve found kindred, especially in making art about the journey. It’s been a particularly lonely few years because of the pandemic but those connections got me through

And Steiner

So glad you got out! The part about "...with that particular scar." left me with chills. I hope you find you scar-loving Tribe soon. 💜💚