Wish upon the Stars chapter 1202 (Patreon)

“Shane,” Benny’s voice washed over me, but I didn’t pay attention. My eyes remained locked on the ceiling, staring up at a single spot on the stone like it held the secrets to the universe. Or a universe. Any universe but this one. “Shane,” he said again. “I need you to respond, man. Say something. Anything.”

I didn’t move. Didn’t speak. I just stared. “Damn it Shane,” snapped my sister as she stalked over and grabbed me by the breastplate, yanking me upright. “What the hell are you doing?” she demanded. 

“Who knows,” I said dully. “What have I ever done? Really? Callie’s gone, Chelsea. A fucking GOD took her. I don’t even know where. I’ve been trying to use the bond, but it’s been shut down. I can’t find her. My wife and unborn daughter just got kidnapped and I have…nothing. No leads. No heading. No idea where to go. So what am I doing? Nothing. I’m doing nothing. Which is all I’m good for.”

It wasn’t reasonable. I should be getting up, getting ready to charge off on another quest. I should be preparing to go punch a sun or something until it told me where she was.

But I couldn’t. I couldn’t move. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t BREATHE. She was gone. Callie was GONE. Not in the sense of being missing, we’d been away from each other before. But I couldn’t FEEL her. Her soul and mine were constantly connected. Even if the bond was closed, I could still feel it pressing against my spirit, but I didn’t. I was alone. Truly alone for the first time in years.

And I couldn’t deal. Callie was my heart, my motivation, the source of my strength. I could sit through literal torture if I had her, had done so a dozen times. But this…I didn’t know how to do this. How to process her and the baby being gone.

“Shit,” my grandfather muttered. “He’s in a recursive loop.”

My grandmother sighed. “There’s a reason people don’t usually have soulmates. Not that I suspect it would be much better without the bond. She’s carrying his child. Can we break it?”

“From the outside?” he said warily. “Maybe? But given how wrapped up their souls are I wouldn’t want to try. Better to have him do it.” He knelt down in front of me, grabbing my chin and jerking it up to meet his gaze. “Shane, you need to get up. It’s a lot, I know. Your stats are heavily wrapped up with Callie, nullifying your bond unbalanced your recursion. You’re spiraling. You need to pull up if you’re going to find her.”

I froze. That was…right. Find her. I should be finding her. Callie was ok. She was just lost. I needed to find her. I staggered to my feet, heading off…somewhere. I’d figure it out. I started to call Dantalion, but my grandfather’s hand cut me off. “Whoa there,” he said quietly. “Calm down, kid. I get it. It’s scary. But we both saw what happened. That crazy goddess won’t hurt your girl. She WILL hurt you if you push things. Which means we need to do two things. One of them is obvious, and the other won’t take much thought. What are we doing? Think it through.”

I clamped my eyes shut, forcing my brain to work. It wouldn’t. So I triggered Piece of Mind. And again. And again. I filled my mind with parallels, with noise that could distract me from the pain and the fear.

My eyes opened, calm and rational. “We need to find out where she went,” I enumerated. “And we need to learn more about Belsara. The second one we can solve by going to find Atlas. What about the first?”

“Judgement,” he said immediately. “Belsara might be able to mess with your link, but there are deeper ties than skills. She won’t be able to block your Karma. Especially not to the baby. That’s your blood. Judgement CAN help. But that’s just a direction. We need more than that. We need Atlas. Which means we need Alara. Unless you plan to make the trip over the Void Roads down to the Chasm again. I’m sure she had some method of contacting him.”

I nodded quickly. “Yes,” I said in relief. “Yes. Alara. She can help.” I forced myself to focus, trying to shake off the fog in my head. “Shit. Recursion can BACKLASH? Why the hell didn’t anyone tell me that?”

“Because most people don’t build their recursion around material things,” he said wryly. “Paired Ascendants aren’t common. But it’s not just you. It’s obviously to a much lower extent, but you see similar spirals from swordmasters who lose their sword, or tamers whose bonded companions die.” At my glare, he held up his hands. “I’m not comparing your wife to a pet or a weapon, Shane, I’m just telling you how the mechanism works.”

“Sorry,” I said after a moment. “I’m just…my blood feels like it's on fire. I need to be doing something. Anything. This isn’t enough. I already wasted who knows how long spiraling-”

Benny cleared his throat. “About an hour,” he informed me. “Wasn’t that long. I don’t…” he trailed off. “Shit, man, are you ok?” He sounded unsure of himself, and not at all like the Benny I knew, but I understood. Seeing me break down like that must have been weird for him. Hell, it was pretty weird for me and I’d been the one doing it.

“Not really,” I said bluntly. “But I’m filling my brain with noise to make it easier to focus. Kind of glad I didn’t manage that Perception balance yet. This would be way worse if I couldn’t distract myself so easily.” I turned to Terry. “Look, I need to go. With Song of Arcadia and Celestial Fabrication working together I should be able to get those timepieces going soon. Is it ok if I have yours delivered later?”

“Of course,” he said firmly. “Family first. Go take care of it. You’ve gotten what you needed.”

Nodding, I turned to my grandmother. “Speaking of going, can the Acheron get us back to the battlefront faster than the trip here? I need to get in touch with Atlas as soon as possible.”

“It makes more sense to consult Judgement first,” my grandfather pointed out. “We’re in the Holy Dominion as we speak, and his lodge is nearby. In fact, we might not even need the ship to get there.” He glanced at Terry. “Can we borrow the Starcannon?”

“To TRAVEL in?” he said uneasily. “I mean, maybe? I guess your Domain should be capable of withstanding it. Are you really that concerned?” At my sharp glance he shook his head. “Of course, my apologies. Yes, you can use the cannon.” He shot me a sympathetic smile. “It’ll get you where you need to be fastest. We use the cannon to launch flame fragments into nearby stars to test them. It’s a complicated process, but barring a Domain like Nicholas’s, I wouldn’t recommend using it as a means of transport. I was simply concerned for your safety, I’m well aware of what’s at stake.”

Nodding, again, I let him go ahead, leading us toward this ‘Starcannon’. I frowned at my grandfather as we walked. “Ok, what did he mean seeding stars?”

“The Starcradles aren’t just called that because they make fire,” he said as we hurried along behind Terry. “Those spheres you saw ARE stars. Or at least prototypes of them. They’re suppressed to that state by the formation, but the actual manifestation process involves firing those small flames, called ‘Starseeds’ into nearby stars. If the seed takes root, it begins to convert the star, consuming its flame as it alters its core properties. Then it's harvested with the formation and condensed into an orb like the ones you’ve seen around.”

“So, we’re about to climb into a cannon that can fire small seeds of flame at a high enough velocity to drive them into the heart of STARS in neighboring systems?” I asked cautiously.

He nodded. “We are. Unless you’d rather take the long way.”

“No, the cannon is fine,” I said immediately. “But we need to be ready to head back as soon as we’re done. Can we have-”

“Your grandmother meet us there?” he cut me off. “Of course. I was planning on it. Our arrival and consultation with Judgement should provide enough time for them to arrive to pick us up, and if not it should be close.”

Swallowing hard, I nodded. I was having trouble processing everything, even with all the parallels running to distract me. I had shifted tactics to try to improve my response times, stacking my parallels to have them all repeatedly run through each thought so I could process them faster. It seemed to help a bit, grinding away some of the fog the distraction wasn’t doing much about.

I didn’t care too much about the cannon. If my grandfather thought it was safe I was sure it was fine. I just needed something to latch onto to keep me going.

My grandmother followed behind us, her face pinched with worry. “Nick, are you sure-”

“He’ll be fine,” he assured her. “My Domain is more than up to the strain. And it IS the fastest way there. I can exert control as we approach and land us safely, but the distance will pass almost instantly.”

She frowned. “If it were anyone else I wouldn’t allow it,” she said bluntly. “Even I wouldn’t be confident, and you know how much I’ve researched stellar travel. As a Demigod, you should be up to the task, but be careful. I want our granddaughter and great grandchild safe as much as you do, but not if it costs Shane his life. Urgent but not reckless, Nicholas. Please.”

His expression, which started so resolute, softened a bit. “I know,” he said quietly. “I won’t take any stupid risks. But I WILL help him get his family back. If it was you, or Sasha…I don’t know what I’d do, but it wouldn’t be safe, that’s for sure. With me there, he’ll be better off.”

She stepped forward as we came to a stop. Wrapping her arms around me, she pulled me into a tight hug. “She’s going to be ok,” she murmured into my ear. “They both are. And so are you.”

I squeezed her back, then stepped away while she hugged my grandfather. “Watch out for him,” she warned him again. Then she turned to Terry. “Can you set the vectors to pass Delraune? Nicholas can derail their passage easier than he can slow an atmospheric descent.”

He nodded quickly. “I can do that. Should I adjust the parabola? With a Domain descent it should be feasible to curve the shot. Would cut down on deceleration trauma, even with a Domain to soften the blow. I’ll have to rework the flight path slightly to account for the curvature, but it shouldn’t take more than a few minutes.”

“Too long,” I said bluntly. I called out Dantalion, triggering the staff to push him to S-rank. He emerged solemnly, and I didn’t even need to speak for him to know what to do. A jerk of my chin and he followed Terry off towards what I assumed was the control room for the cannon.

Speaking of which, the doors to the room we’d arrived at opened not long after they left, admitting us into a huge metallic chamber. The rooms was in the shape of a cylinder, and looking up the barrel I could see a faint gleam of light. It was WIDE too, almost a mile across at the widest point.

“Be safe,” my grandmother said as my grandfather led me to the center of the room. She stepped out and he manifested his Domain around us. I waited for a moment or two, and felt Dantalion return to Gehenna. I tapped his shoulder to tell him to get ready, and we prepared for launch. There was a countdown, off in the distance, almost out of earshot, and then, with an almost physical roar, the room dissolved into a sea of fire.