an outsider's rant (Patreon)

I'm no stranger to people in the music industry belittling The Ridleys. That's been happening since we organized our first show in Route 196. Certain industry people expressed their doubts that we could fill Route with listeners. But we did.

I've always felt like a stranger in the music industry, and I've always wondered why that is. Is it because I'm not a music student? Do they think I'm invading a space, taking the spot of someone more deserving?

I already know that some people dislike us for the kind of music we make. Maybe to them, it's not produced professionally. To that, I would reply that we never produced our earlier works professionally... Because we didn't set out to be professionals.

Maybe our music is too "soft" rather than loud, bold, and confident. If that's the case, then I would reply that I was never loud, bold, confident when I wrote these songs. I can't be who I'm not.

Is it annoying that I wear my heart on my sleeve and say what I really feel? Probably. But I can't be any other way. When I'm vulnerable on stage, that is who I really am.

Don't tell me it's because of my privilege. As far as I know, the two (maybe three) people who don't like me also grew up with privilege. I did grow up financially stable, but I never had family members in the music industry who put me in positions I didn't have to work for.

I've always felt like an outsider in the Filipino music industry. And so it sucks to hear that people talk about me and my band behind my back. I'm already paranoid, and this paranoia becomes worse with instances like this.

But anyway. I'll do what I always do. I'll keep my head down, make the music I want to make, connect with people who truly understand my music, and stick with my own small but growing community.

"Just make better music," someone might reply. Yeah. I'm working towards that in my own way. To me, words have always been important. I've always worked to improve my songwriting, while collaborating with other producers to help me express my message sonically.

I want the next Ridleys album to be excellent both lyrically and sonically. I want to make it The Ridleys' best album, to the best of my ability. And if I fall short of that goal, then I'll try again with the next album. I take my craft seriously.

I'm happy when people message The Ridleys to tell us that our songs speak to them. That's the goal.

I'm grateful to the older bands and music industry people who do support us. Kuyas and Ates who embrace their role as our mentors and encouragers. I would appreciate more of these in my life.

To the next generation of bands who look up to us, I want to encourage them to keep making good art. I want to be the kind of kuya that I never experienced growing up.