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Fuck me that ending, such a lovely idea but holy fucking shit, it destroyed me

Link 1 (Google Drive): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1OmiF1LNI1FbUTlitD1Pv5m00YBI-0shC/view?usp=drive_link

Link 2 (Dropbox): https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/9ch6knhugvd8cvkk0tynx/911-S8E16.mp4?rlkey=lxd0d3z5ak431b4wpmk4o0paf&st=be5ybrew&dl=0Google Drive Tip: It takes time for Google Drive to process videos. If it says "still processing" or is only allowing you to view at 360p, then you can always come back later or download the video in fullDropbox Tip: The quality of the video is lower while streaming so I recommend downloading or using google drive if thats an issue

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Beff

Being an angry griever is such a complicated relationship to have with yourself and the person you lost. I was angry when my grandma died. I was incredibly close to her, and I spent 90% of my childhood with her, and when she passed, there was a festering rage that just burned inside of me for about 6 months. I was angry at my grandma for leaving me, then I was angry at myself for being angry at her, and then I was angry at my family for not noticing that I was angry, and it cycled back to being angry at my grandma for making me angry at my family because they couldn't do anything about it, and then I was angry at them for not being able to do anything about it, and it was just a long, continuous cycle that placed blame on what and whoever I could 24/7. I woke up angry, went to bed angry, went to work angry, and took college exams angry. A bad time to be in a fresh relationship lol (we were dating before my grandma passed, fyi). I never took it out on anyone (I'm a journaling person), but that fire burned until it just didn't anymore. I think in the end, I was just exhausted from being angry all the time. 7 years later, I've got myself together. Every person grieves differently, and I believe the type of grief you experience depends on the circumstances, but it's a bit of a shock when you grieve in a way you don't expect. Never in a thousand years did I expect that I, someone who is very hard to make angry on a regular day, would be ANGRY that someone died. Grief is a funny thing.

Harry Allen

Thanks for sharing your story and I am really sorry u had to go through all that 🧡 grief is such an interesting thing, like its awful, but it really is fascinating just how differently we all experience it. Also such a good point about the unexpected nature of it too, I remember being so confused when I went to my first funeral as I had no 'tools' to deal with grief on that level. In that way I think it gets easier in time, but fuck me is it a bastard of an emotion