turbulent (Patreon)

today was difficult.
didn't sleep well. had some unpleasant dreams. dealing with the somatic pain.
not really sure what's up. it's obviously Something.
is it the pressure to work?
is it the house?
it has been a day of lethargy and unidentified sadness.
i guess i haven't totally shaken the emotional blindness.

but i still wrote.
2.7k today. all from scratch. proud of that, at least.

this was an example of a day i really did not want to write initially, but, i put myself in the room with the computer, and i am glad i did.

we do it again tomorrow.
meanwhile i am going to go engage in self care in the form of sleep and/or doing nothing whatsoever.

cass: yeah idk what's wrong with her either, but i'm pretty sure all of her guesses are as to why she's a big sad face today aren't it.

i should probably mention that i did do something a few days ago, in that ame wrote some stuff and then i read it. now, i edited some people's essays back when i was in an environment where those had to be written, and i, uh, well.... those people sure wrote some good fucking papers when i was done with them.

so whatever lil miss frowny emoji up there puts out, it'll be fuckin great when i'm done with it. i'm a little shit at writing things from scratch, but the dream team play here is essentially that ame writes the stuff and then i assemble it. somehow we'll get a game out of that, i think.

in the meantime i'll try and keep her held together.