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Jack & Jill - Phase 9, Part 20 (Patreon)

Published:
2025-05-16 03:46:43
Edited:
2025-05-17 01:25:28
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

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Content

On the night before the Coming Out dinner, Jill reflects on identity and transition while those around her make their final preparations. As dawn approaches, alliances shift, secrets surface, and every resident of Clinic 12 faces their own personal reckoning.

Will Jill find the strength to change not just herself, but the very system that changed her?

I can't believe we're so close (FINALLY!) to the Coming Out dinner - after 8 years of this story! Everything is coming to a head. I'm both nervous and VERY excited. 💕P.S. Included a PDF of the 'Dramatic Personae" of every character in this episode!

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Comments

Joe

Has connie had her srs?

TheVampire

So excited for Connie and her new 🐱

Omagathief

A very philosophical chapter this time. It does make you think about your own life sometimes. Great chapter as always 🥰

Jade Diaz

Omgggggggggg Xu has top surgery scars holy fucking shit!!! 😱😱😱

Crewchick

Emory, as always a great episode! But you have me on pins and needles waiting for the action to begin. What is up with Connor/Connie? Is Davis showing him security cam footage of Jill when she made her decision on who to save to F with Connie's mind and poison any chance at a civil relationship between Connie and Jill? Also I assume that is Mike spying on "Joey"/Josie and Emily? Is he being "pervy" or was he actually trying to lookout for and protect Josie? And lastly (for now) what is the story behind Xu's scars? His back looks like he was whipped repeatedly. But you have a full panel looking head on at Xu's chest. They almost look like double mastectomy scars. With all you were saying about victims repeating the cycle and becoming the villain in someone else's story, was Xu the victim of someone else 's actions to impose a gender switch on him? And what is up with Madison? Is she coming to the Island for the contest? And lastly (for now anyway) did Connor's surgery include eye work? Because Connie almost looks Asian.

Jade Diaz

He’s watching “The Jack and Jill show” so now he knows exactly what happened

Gemma

Deep thoughtful and very insightful reflections by Jill. These insights highlight the ‘post traumatic growth’ Jill has undertaken in the midst of the trauma and challenging life experiences she has encountered (both pre and post second dawn).

Nolwenn (edited)

Comment edits

2026-09-14 23:00 A really good one. In two pictures, you learned mor about mr Xu than the 9 last phase. I suspected something like that but damn that's not old scares he had on bust. ( it like he open it regularly to remember the pain.) Love the connie's reaction ( i really love this charactere and i think her vengeance could be really hard.
2025-05-16 08:12

Ellen Mellor

That was beautiful, lyrical and true. This is possibly the best piece of your writing that I've read. The juxtaposition of images with narrative was fantastically effective and moving. The tension of what is going to happen in the next few installments is almost unbearable and the revelation of Xu's top surgery scars is a twist that I didn't see coming at all. When this part is complete I'm going to have to go back and reread the whole thing to see if there were any clues that I missed. Not that I wasn't going to be rereading it if the twist wasn't there. In short, I enjoyed that. More please.

Kris Greg

Terrific, beautiful entry. It reveals a lot despite being a respite from the action. I'm eagerly waiting for the next chapter!

Maggie Heels

I knew it... since the update telling the story of Xu... 😊

Ella Cherry

So beautiful how Jill’s narration gently leads us through the chapter while building up the tension for what’s coming next! I loved it!

Crewchick

But would the J&J show really provide that kind of behind the scenes insights on how Second Dawn is run and the arbitrariness of some of the decision making and who among the patients and staff might be Xu’s favorites? That kind of info would seem to go against the propaganda purposes of the J&J show to trust the process and accept and embrace the change. How many patients were down in level 0 when Jill went down there to make her choice? Every one of them could very well have a similar response as Connie, why didn’t Jill pick me? It moves her from role model to emulate to object of contempt and resentment. “Why Jill, why didn't Xu choose me” would be said by anyone there almost as long as Jill. It would also sew discord among the staff for all the same reasons. This seems more like the kind of weapon Davis would use to torment and fuck with Connie’s brain. “Look, your brother/sister-in-law just threw you over for some rando misfit she is now sleeping with. And that was after she gave you the first injection that send you down this rabbit hole transition.”

Phoebe Nocturne

There was a framed photo of a young girl shown in one of the meeting scenes with Xu, if I'm remembering correctly. Given that there were no other signs of family photos I saw (and maybe my own assumptions of the character mixed in there), that was about when I started to suspect it was a reminder of his own past... Still not even sure if I was right about that being an actual clue or not! But it seemed like the kind of foreshadowing to a reveal Emory would do, lol.

Emory Ahlberg

Not yet. He's just holding himself protectively knowing what's supposed to be coming.

Eva Grimm

I felt it coming, and while I believe it occurred to me before seeing the photo of the young girl that Phoebe mentioned, that clinched it for me. I think a lot of it was just how Xu talked about what he was doing and how he saw it as justified.

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you so much, Ellen! I wanted to have this "check in" episode as one final peek at where everyone is in the story, and I've been waiting to write Jill's last diary entry, reflecting on everything. 💕 Phoebe: You're right about that. 😊 Xu even said that girl was part of his history, and that she was "murdered." Also, we know that when he became powerful, he bulldozed his hometown. Eva: Yes. It's even why Xu started all this by making Holden into Holly. Xu being a girl was seen as a failure, so what better way to hurt a man than to make his son a girl. Of course, what eventually fascinated him was how Holly adapted and became stronger instead of breaking.

Crewchick

O.K., now I need to know was Xu's change physically forced on him (her) like he is doing to men through New Dawn, or was it a choice, possibly forced through situation, but one Xu chose because so much was denied and closed off to her as a woman and possibly even physical abuse and degradation which might have left her feeling there were only two choices, death or change? If the former then who was the primogenitor who imposed this on Xu and what is their story, since the Jill monologue talks about perpetuation of one's pain onto others until someone says 'enough this stops with me'?

Soupy Dog

So since Xu was forcibly changed from a woman to a man, he now feels the need to change others?

Sunflower

Gosh, what a profound chapter. What a wonderful vehicle you've created for exploring these ideas. Jill's thoughts really resonate with me - that all identity is transitory in some sense, but most of us just don't realize it. And desire as a river - perhaps that metaphor could be extended to identity too. Always flowing, being shaped by what we encounter in life, liquid and mutable. Yes, there is some solid nub in the center, that remains despite what is thrust upon us, but maybe all the rest that envelops it - personality, ideology, preferences, gender - are all much more fluid than we can imagine. Thank you for giving us such a beautiful framework to spark such meditations!

Pelicanboss

OMG E! THAT WAS POETRY! You're not only the best story writer but also an amazing poet. The meaning was deep and profound. I heard you.

Joe

Man I hope it still happens with xu being shot and everything

SingularCurve

This is powerful stuff here. Behind the beautiful prose is the whole question that we as trans people need to answer for ourselves, individually. Such profound insights. So Deep of a thought process. The fact that you write like this, and make it seem so fluffy on the surface yet intellectually driven behind it all is one of the reasons I continue my sub even if little to no actual content is created. (Another is that I have/had money, and supporting artists is one of the little things I can do to help improve the world)

Ryan

I agree.

stacy C

Great writing Em....has it really been 8 years? Wow! x

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you, Omaga! That is a big compliment - I like stories that are dramatic, sexy, and thoughtful in equal measure 💕

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you for the comment, Diana! 💕 Davis certainly operates on a level of psychological sadism that makes him... um... uniquely dangerous. But in this case, we're just watching the J&J show. Since Jill is supposed to be an 'ideal' companion, her being given this choice is showing independence and growth the other companions cold aspire to... even as they're undergoing their transitions. Yeah... Mike's position is FRAUGHT. His actions are a tangle of guilt from his past, particularly concerning Josie, and the grim necessities of his present. Morosini DID say that he was alerted to Josie's predicament by somebody on the "inside" - might it have been Mike? Regarding Mr. Xu, your observation about his scars is correct. He sees himself as a sculptor but that doesn't mean he wasn't once the clay! Madison is just trying to contact anyone who could help, and unfortunately running into brick walls. And Dr. Hatcher’s "artistry" with Connor - right now his face is really swollen, so it makes it hard to judge what he'll look like in the end!

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you, Gemma! I've always felt that her 'post-traumatic growth' isn't about erasing the trauma really - she's integrating it into who she is becoming. It's her way of making sense of an unimaginable reality, and in doing so, she's forging a new kind of strength. The pain doesn't vanish, but she finds a way to build from it. The challenges she faced, both as Jack and now as Jill, have all contributed to this incredibly complex, resilient woman!

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you, Nolwenn! Yeah, those scars on Mr. Xu are a very deliberate re-sculpting of his own past... a constant, tangible reminder of control wrested from chaos.

Gemma

Spot on Emory, spot on!

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you, Kris! These interludes are where the revelations often surface. It's one thing for me to show the external drama, but it's maybe in the silences that we really get to see the shifts happening within Jill, Holly, or even someone as resistant as Ryan.

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you Ella! I find Jill’s voice is so central to navigating the her world, so it's really fun to lean into a whole V.O. from her. But, as you pointed out, the tension is always thrumming beneath that surface!

Emory Ahlberg

More will be revealed about Mr. Xu... but we know the reason he changed Holden into Holly in the first place is because her father had insulted him and apparently owed him a huge debt. Xu believed changing his heir into a woman would get him to apologize and pay. Apparently, the idea of making his son into his daughter seemed like a great "weapon" to use against a business rival. That was the seed of Second Dawn, but that doesn't mean Xu hasn't changed like (almost) everyone else over the years. What started as a side business has become an obsession with remaking a man into a woman... and not just physically.

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you so much, Sunflower! I tend to think of identity, much like desire, as this powerful, flowing force. For Jill, the circumstances were extreme, yes, but it forced her to confront how much of what she thought was solid was actually quite fluid. The world kept throwing up dams and redirecting her path, but that core "her," that little spark you mentioned, just had to find new ways to move. There's so much of ourselves I think we only discover when the familiar landscapes are completely reshaped. When that happened for me, that really made me realize how much of our "selves" are built in response to everything around us.

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you both! I'm so glad Jill's reflections connected. 💕I was trying to capture the essence of transition - hers and everyone's and how it's not just the physical, but also the big internal shifts. I think when a character goes through so much, their innermost thoughts can take on a kind of distilled clarity. 😊

Emory Ahlberg

A bit! I didn't want it to come off as a stereotypical "they're really X!?" reveal we see sometimes, especially when it comes to gender. 💕

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you! 💕 I really strive for making a story that's more than just a fun ride, that there are these deeper questions about who we are, especially as trans individuals, tucked in there. I love playing with that contrast, sexiness but also real heart and thought underneath. At least that's the goal. 😊

Emory Ahlberg

Thank you so much, Stacy! Yeah... incredible, huh? Thank you for being with me for this whole journey! 🥰

stacy C

It's been a pleasure my friend watching you progress in your creativity to one of the premium content providers.....I'm sure others would agree :-) x