Me? Human? : Chapter 20 : Fuck you, Diadora! (Patreon)

Disclaimer - I don't own any of the characters appearing in High School DXD or the Anime or the manga whatsoever.

ORC, Kuoh, Japan

–Motohama Kenji–

As he looked at the sleeping form of his mother, covered in a stasis spell that was apparently proven to work on humans safely and had no recorded failures in centuries over millions of uses, it was both a little worrying and reassuring.

Reassuring because that meant that it was truly safe and his mom should be fine for the short duration she was going to be under, compared to the decades some human spent under the tender mercies of the spell and came out just fine, except the physical aging and the subsequent mental breakdown at being told that they had spent decades of their life sleeping and had their lies ruined by DEvils with their bullshit magic.

Worrying because that meant Devils had a spell literally perfected to keep humans in stasis, and he was not sure how comfortable he was with that. But since he had no personal strength that could help with the situation, he shrugged and moved on, focusing on the here and now, instead of the distant future where he would have the necessary power to change the rules and traditions of this world.

“So, now that she is safe, would you mind answering some of my questions?” Rias batted her eyes at him, caressing his arms as if that was going to work. He deadpanned at her rather poor attempt at seduction, and he only called it that because of her smoking hot body. Otherwise, it would have just come off as awkward and amateur, but since it was a literal Supernatural Devil, it somehow worked.

The contradiction of a shy, naive, and inexperienced Devil trying to use her charms on him with her body was a tantalising prospect, and yet, he held himself back. He thanked his mother for that. If he had been all by himself, he would have given in, probably, but since his mother’s safety was on the line, he felt nothing in the face of her attempts.

Deadpanning at her, “She’s asleep. Ask any questions you might have in the office. I don’t guarantee answers, though.”

She pouted at him, once again trying to use her charms, but he just walked past her, not even acknowledging her act of puffing her chest out to make sure it grazed his arms as he walked past her. 

Before he left, though, he looked at her and smirked, “Noob.” 

He heard a silent, “Gah!” before they entered her office. Sitting in front of an irate Rias and a very amused looking Akeno, he really felt like he could relate to them, and then, his mind came running forth with suspicion. It was clearly a trick to get his guard down, and make them look more approachable, and thus, make the option of becoming a member of her Peerage far more appealing than just becoming the slave of an unknown Devil, with all the accompanying negative connotations.

“So, what is your power?” Akeno asked him, taking over the interrogation for the time being.

He answered, “I hit really hard, really fast, and heal fast.”

“By eating grass?”

“By eating anything edible.” He corrected her.

“And how did you get so strong?”

“I dunno.”

“Can you heal from anything?”

“Dunno.”

“What is the worst thing you have healed from?”

He gave Akeno a look as if she was stupid for even asking that question. Then, he replied, “I am not going to deign that with a response.”

She flushed, understanding the futility of her question. They had seen him half dead, bleeding everywhere, with a hole instead of his back, his spine in tatters. That was the closest he had come to death and while he appreciated that boost he got as a result of that, he would much rather never experience something like that again.

On the off chance it did happen again, though, he now had not just advanced pain resistance but also Light resistance. It should help immensely in the upcoming battle. Speaking of the upcoming battle, “How long until Sona is done with her information gathering? Also, where is Issei? I haven’t seen him all day. He is fine, right?” He asked them with suspicion, not trusting them even if they did save Issei and, by the mechanism of the Evil Pieces, was technically her property.

Even if that was the case, he would much rather make sure that Issei was fine rather than just assuming that the rarest of the rare Devil that treated their peerage right was sitting right in front of him and take that as gospel.

Rias waved his worries off, “He is sleeping his injuries off. I would have helped speed things along, but some other matters occupied my attention.” That he was the other matter, went unsaid.

“I offered to do it.” Akeno replied teasingly, and he just gave them a confused look before replying, “So, why not do it?”

Akeno then looked at him with half lidded eyes, her long tongue coming out to lick her lips. “Because the method is unorthodox.”

What is unorthodox for a devil?” he asked, amused and aroused at the attempt. He was starting to think that Akeno here was going to be a far more tempting candidate than Rias. Akeno was just the right amount of forward and shy for him, the added benefit of banging who was essentially a priestess of some sort for one of the Japanese gods only added to her allure.

Still, he couldn't let himself be led astray by his lower half. He had to settle stuff here ASAP so he could get his mom out of Stasis and finally tell her about the supernatural world in a controlled setting. Then, a thought struck him, as he looked at Rias with wide eyes and an urgency in his voice, something that immediately made both the Devils in front of him tense.

“Wait! We forgot about her job. My mom absolutely can’t afford losing that job. It pays too well, and she never takes sick days, so explaining something like this–”

“Ah, that,” Rias sighed in relief and waved his worries off, “Don’t worry about that. She’s working for one of the Gremory financial companies. I have already authorised a month long sabbatical for her, authorised by me.”

He gave her a dubious look, “You can do that?” Ofcourse, he made sure that his shock at the fact that his mother worked for a Devil business was not visible on his face, as he ribbed her about her apparent age and inability to make any important decisions in a company her family owned.

“Ofcourse, I can!”

“If you say so.”

After that, he was all but kicked out of the office, because they had a Devil-only meeting that he was totally invited to, provided he became a devil. He declined, and thus, he was out again on the streets. This worked fine, as well as searching for Asia, and Freed was on the top of his list right now.

He expected to find none of them on the first try, but apparently, Lady Luck was shining on him today because, within two hours of him roaming around Town, occasionally heading increasingly closer to the abandoned church in the remote corner of the town, just behind the Sewage Treatment Plant so he could justify his intel of the Fallen’s location, he found her.

Asia Argento. 

A short blonde, wearing the stereotypical nun’s outfit, looking increasingly distressed, wringing her hands together, as she looked at the traffic in front of her, and just didn’t know she had to press a button to make the cars stop. Pedestrian traffic was very sparse at this time of the day, so she likely hadn’t had anyone who could tell her what to do or to follow.

Something about the sight made his heart clench as he sighed and walked up to her, knowing full well that he would not be able to communicate with her, what with her absolute lack of English or Japanese proficiency and him not knowing any Italian.

Pressing the button, he offered her a hand and a smile. She looked up at him, and that’s when he noticed the bags under her eyes, the panic and confusion in her eyes, and the way her robes hung on her, as if she had been wandering about without any food or rest. Ofcourse she had been doing that.

Welp, Diodora was fucked, of that he was certain. It didn’t matter he was probably barely a high class at this point, even if he mastered this new source of energy within him, but the bastard was going to die soon. A painful death, if he had any say in it.

Signaling to her that he was going to help her pass the road, he offered his hand once more, and this time, she hesitantly took it as he helped her cross the road. Once that was done, she smiled at him and said something in Italian, likely thanking him. He nodded and then watched her go, his smile disappearing from his face as he contemplated his options.

He couldn't take her to Rias. That was just a one way ticket to her becoming a Devil in her peerage. Healing of any form was precious and one that worked on Devils even more so. Having someone like that in her Peerage while she had a Rating Game with a Phenex might just tempt Rias even more.

If only he had something as nifty and convenient as the Devil’s ability to talk and understand all spoken mortal languages. Alas, all he could do was follow her from a safe distance to check if the Fallen came to get her.

And by hour two itself, he found himself wondering just how she managed to make her way all the way to Kuoh from the Vatican. Either Big G had blessed her from beyond the wall that separated the living and the dead, or she was just that lucky, or the more likely option, which was that someone watched her and made sure she reached her destination.

The thing was that he couldn’t get any buzzing feeling he got whenever he sensed magic being used around him. Sure, whenever he got too close, or he stepped onto one of the many flyers that the Devils of the two distributed, but never from a distance.

He desperately hoped that the new buzzing ability would allow him to discern any supernatural being trying to disguise themselves.

By hour four, Asia had likely understood that she was lost and she was not going to reach her destination anytime soon, leading to a small breakdown she managed to cut short when she saw an injured stray dog. He had to fight himself from rushing forward at the sight of her beautiful smile as she healed the stray dog in the middle of a park, but held on. 

By hour five, Asia had given up and was sitting on a park bench, looking at the setting sun, and that was when he finally had enough. Walking forward, he entered the park with his hands in his pockets, trying to project an air of nonchalance.

The aura broke completely when he rushed forward and offered her a handkerchief to wipe her tears.

Fuck you, Diadora! Wait for me.