Rangiku (Patreon)

You know what sucks about being the Lieutenant of Tōshirō Hitsugaya? He’s just a little kid. Yeah he’s a prodigy and all and I do that respect that and understand in a few decades he’ll be one of the greatest Shinigami who ever existed. But I mean, he’s not exactly my type of guy. Maybe if he was 250 years old, he’d be more my type, but he’s not there yet. Especially because he’s not as strong as u would want from a Captain I serve. For example, when we’re ordered to find out the source of a growing rise of Hollows known in the area. Hollows that were destroying whole villages and threatening to invade soul society itself. The Captain, I, and a dozen Shinigami were sent in to find out if the Hollows were in this area and swarming in numbers. As we found out, that exactly was what happened. Just a bit more than they had predicted at all.

I assume Tōshirō thought the problem was going to be just a few dozen Hollows, maybe a hundred at most. Not even close. It was more somewhere between 30,000 and 50,000 Hollows. No one really noticed two of the Shinigami, men who dedicated their near immortal lives to fight and kill Hollows, ran away with them screaming like little girls. I would have stopped them, but I was too busy yawning and knowing this wasn’t going to be a problem for me to handle. Tōshirō was so busy trying to figure out how to even get word out they needed every single Shinigami, when I leaped down from the cliff towards the bottom of the ground to get near the Hollows. I heard some of the screams of the Shinigami for me not to throw my life away when I headed down there.

I don’t think they have any idea what kind of woman I am. The Hollows saw me coming for them, and they leaped right at me with teeth ready to tear me apart, and claws ready to shred me. The Hollows let out a powerful roar and fury of spirit power that nearly destroyed the entire mountain side that the Shinigami were cowering at. I felt the wave of spirit pressure, and let it flow at me. What was meant to be was a powerful storm that tore me apart, was more like a nice soft breeze. I even felt my gorgeous locks flow from the energy, and smiled as I finally hit the ground. When I did, I let out a SMALL bit of pressure, and entire spirit bombs fire off. Dozens of the Hollows that surrounded me EXPLODED with enough force to take out the very Hollows around them. My own landing also caused the very area to shake, and every Hollow, even the strongest of them, had dropped right to their knees and shaking to their core.

The poor Hollows never saw me coming when I pulled my sword from the sheath. With incredible speed and force, I threw the sheathe right at one of the Hollows, and burst right through it. Than it burst right through a whole line of Hollows right behind them. It didn’t stop at all as various Hollows leaped at me, ready to slice me apart. I looked at every single one of the Hollows, and got a detailed description of each and every single one. That way, I made sure to decapitate each one with a single slice of my sword and tore their heads right off. It was a dance as I twirled around the area, like a ballerina, just slicing the heads off Hollows and than dicing apart the bodies. My arms were like blurs to the Hollows, and any unlucky enough to not get hit by my sword, were crushed to death by my elbow strikes and knee crushes. I was wiping out whole hordes of Hollows, and they tried to fight back with their own methods.

Some of the Hollows attacked me with spirit blasts, which I didn’t even register to me. I just twirled my body and with a butt slam, threw a ball of energy that had enough power to kill a squad of Shinigami right back at the Hollow who fired it. Thanks to my rather impressive and huge butt, the slap counter caused more energy to form and take out a whole group of Hollows. Dozens more fired off similar attacks, hoping to wipe me out by the sheer barrage of the attacks, and it might have worked. If it wasn’t me that they were attacking, I mean. I just butt slapped each and every one, considering it a real fun game. I didn’t even pause in my actual attacks, slicing apart so many Hollows as the Hollows were blasted away by my own attacks. These things aren’t meant to feel fear, but I swore I could hear them starting to cry when I got near to them.

I would have felt mercy for them if they actually tried surrendering, and not attack me just for being there and sexy. Eventually, I saw the real powerhouses among the Hollows.  Vasto Lorde. Strongest of the Hollows, and able to tear apart even Captains. I may not have found Tōshirō cute, but he was still my captain so I had to defend him. For the strongest and deadliest Hollows, I gave them a special attack when they rushed at me with light speed and with enough fury to tear apart even mountains. I slammed the greatest pair of tits to ever grace Soul Society right into the heads of the Vasto Lordes, instantly exploding them when I did. The power of my jiggling caused the very Hollows around them to explode from the vibrational force, and I swung my tits to act as a hammer, tearing apart another Vasto Lorde. The third, and last, saw me ready for it and it did the smartest thing any Hollow could have done. It ran. Too bad for it, it headed right for the Shinigami. Its plan was to hold them hostage, I knew it. So I had to get rid of it before it even got there.

Thousands of Hollows around me, so many trying to attack me, so many trying to run, and not a single one who is trying to surrender. Thus, I punish them, by spinning my body as quickly as I can. I was a Shinigami tornado, sucking up thousands of Hollows right towards me, and I had my sword up and ready. I sliced, diced, and cleaved right through Tens of thousands of Hollows in a matter of seconds. It was fun playing with them at first, and really I could have played more with them, but that’s the worst parts of being a Lieutenant. All work and no play. Really could drive a woman crazy. In a matter of moments, I was done with every single one of them. Surrounded by destroyed bodies and remains of Hollows, I looked up at the very confused Captain. He had a really cute surprised look, so I blew him a kiss. Man, he’ll be really cute when he’s 250 years old. But right now, I think I’ll catch up to those cowardly Shinigami and punish them for failing in their duty in a way that’ll make this look like a slap on the wrist, than, if I have time… maybe find a really cute Shinigami soldier who’s just my type and ‘punish’ him for slacking off… in a way that’ll make him the happiest dead man of all. What can I say, I try to have fun when I’m not working, because work is just too easy. Maybe next time, I can spar with a female Shinigami, now THAT is a workout.