Isekai Short Story (Patreon)

I have no idea what I’m doing here. I just look around at where I am, and I’m immediately confused by what I see. The last thing I remember, I saw a blimp coming at me on the street, and I thought that blimps suck. Instead of being covered by whatever a blimp was made of and smothered in fire, I instead saw a room of guys who all looked like really dumb wizards. The guys were confused, and one of them, an older guy, barked at the others.

“You fools! This isn’t the single greatest warrior to ever exist! This is some… some girl!”

Some girl? How dare they call me some girl, don’t they know who I am?! I’m a super model, and easily one of the most famous and popular in the world. I’m on magazines and talk shows and even invited to movies just to get publicity. My dress probably costs more than this very outhouse they cal a castle! It was pathetic these men thought they could really anger me like that, and I more than made it clear when I began pointing at them and clicking my tongue in a way that makes any man fear my wrath.

“Listen you weird old incels, you want to take me here and get mad about forcing me here? Then fine, get mad, and I’ll get madder back!”

The wizards who heard me were rather mad at the insults. How dare she make fun of them, when they were the single greatest magic masters of all time, I bet they thought. At that, the magic swirled around them and fire began to form near them. I bet they thought they thought they were hot shit, starting some kind of fire inferno. The intent was probably to scare me, rather than just incinerate who they thought was some poor little girl. The large blue flames swirled around me and surrounded me as if I was in a maze. I wasn’t even caring about any of this as I was staring at all of the flames and only got annoyed when I felt an ember hit my perfect platinum blonde hair. Raising my hands, I clapped as hard as I could and exploded the flames in front of me. The flames instantly went out, and the wizards had no idea what to really think or expect, given how dumb their expressions were. I was just standing on the podium folded her arms in annoyance, and clicked my tongue, unimpressed by how sad these old weirdos in ugly bathrobes were.

“Now what was that annoying light show supposed to be? Scary?”

The wizards didn’t even know what to think. How could anyone have done what she done without any trace of magic? It made no sense, and one of the wizards was very mad. I could have told them how I did it. Sure, that blimp crushed me, but they wanted the greatest warrior ever… and I could feel a sense of power emanating in me. They chose will power, not physical power, and that will power was translating to real strength in this dimension. Which made me, in effect with how strong I was in personality… The strongest being ever to grace this dimension. One of the wizards wasn’t used to being insulted in such a manner by anyone. Especially by some woman he just teleported into his life and made to listen to him and his fellow wizards. Typical male. The wizard shoved his hands out, and yelled out a powerful spell that made all the bones in his body tingle. It was a lightning bolt spell, with enough power behind him to take out the entire room of the castle if he allowed it. Instead, all he did was center it at the source at my chest. Typical, men can’t keep their eyes off how perky it is. Lightning filled up inside of him as his veins were on fire, and he let out a war cry as his body glew. I knew what was coming, and only made one move. I yawned. Lightning moved at about 1/3rd the speed of light, and it wasn’t a big room. The lightning bolt headed right for me, and all I had to do to dodge this attack… was slightly move to the left. The lightning bolt looked to be moving in slow motion, as I watched it crackle and fizzle as I took a few steps back. I was certain it couldn’t even harm me as it missed me as it blew apart the wall behind myself. The wizard didn’t even see me dodge it. What the wizard did see, was a very big hand.

It was my hand, slapping him square in the face and sending the wizard flying. The wizard crashed hard into a wall, and the other wizards were baffled by what they had just seen happen. Never before had one of their own been assaulted in such a manner. They were the greatest wizards among the realms, who could dare harm them? Who would even TRY? Easy. I would. The other two wizards looked at each other, and knew instantly what they had to do. A United spell to attack me. It would be deadly, and it would be costly. It would have more than enough force to knock out both of the wizards. But the curse they shall lay upon her should take down this dangerous woman. Both wizards rose in the air, levitating by force as they chanted their curse. The energy behind the curse increased between them as purple smoke formed around them, and than the purple smoke formed a massive hand. It was a crush curse. A curse so powerful, they could crush stone right between their giant fingers. The curse rushed out for its intended target, and even the fingers alone were as large as myself. I was a rather slender woman, so the large hand looked gigantic to me as it was coming for myself, a hand that represented death for so many. I only scoffed at it. Why would I ever be scared of purple smoke, as if I was some child? I made sure to show how little I thought of the hand made up by some boys with too much time when I grabbed the thumb from the hand.

The thumb was as thick as my whole torso and just as large as I was tall, having more than enough power behind it to crush any solid it interacted with. Not even spears or axes could harm the thumb at all. The thumb was instantly snapped  by the force of me pushing with one hand against the thumb, causing agony to the hand. I didn’t even push that hard, like I was pushing a door open. The hand had never experienced such pain to itself, and the Smokey curse exploded in force from the fact it’s own thumb was destroyed. Both wizards were blasted away by the force of the curse breaking apart by what she had done, and the curse faded away. I had just broken and destroyed the personal room of three great wizards. I also did so, by taking down the three wizards. I flipped my hair in annoyance. I still don’t understand what brought me here. My first and only concern right now… is finding someone who can do my hair, cause all this action got it messy. God, I hate how stupid men are when they think I’ll do something for them just cause they transport me past a dimension or two. I swear if I find this stupid monster they summoned me for, I’m kicking that thing to the moon. Or rather, through the moon.