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Early update for July 23, 2025 (Patreon)

Published:
2025-07-22 03:55:00
Imported:
2026-06

Content

lemme know when there's new information

Files

Comments

Maybeeus

I kinda forgot Sal is Actually Solid Snake.

Jim Avery

Really, I'm not sure who is going to be surprised by this. I'm not even sure Walky will not have seen this coming.

Andrea Andrew

Yeah. Of course Sal knew before they even knew.

el

now cue the Danny, who Does have a reaction (and a ukelele)

Mark Thompson

She’s outta line but she’s right

Sajuuk-Khar

Sal would like you two to know that engravings give you no tactical lesbian advantage whatsoever

Tim Mitchell

These two hooking up will surprise exactly no one who knows them.

Kelly (they-them)

Joyce keeps wearing Sal's clothing on her dates with Dorothy

Maude Reads Things

She may or may not have actually realized something changed if she didn't directly see you kiss. And uh. Yeah. I'd be worried too if my boyfriend's hypothetical twin sister saw me with someone else romantically. Whether or not Sal will say anything, I don't know. I could believably see her either deciding it's not her business and not her place to tell Walky or that she has to tell him because he's her brother. Or somewhere in the middle like giving Dorothy a chance to tell him and then doing it herself if she doesn't after a certain period of time.

Smoochie

Sal didn’t catch the smooching or she genuinely refuses to be caught in the drama vortex that’s about to ensue. Either way? On brand.

David M Willis

the alt-text for the main site reads: 'every other night joyce takes one of my jackets an' you two run off an' do gay shit, what's the surprise' but that doesn't work for comment text here because it's likely one reads it before the strip

Lazuli

lmao

Harold

Sal catches Dorothy and Joyce naked in bed together: "Nope, still less gay"

The25th

Next strip reveals the entire gang is just out of frame.

EnterTheHero

Oh, gods, this IS actually less gay than they usually are together.

Sajuuk-Khar

Danny starts playing Toxic Gossip Train

Ragtime

oh wow, Joyce is a haunted wight in panel 3.

Harold

@el: Well, after his conversation with Dorothy yesterday (yes! it was just yesterday!) he knows she's bi (or at least bi-curious), and the next logical step would be to assume that this awakening is associated with a specific person. He probably DOESN'T know yet that the specific person is his best friend's girlfriend.

Harold

The Gang Gets an Eyeful

Crunchos cereal

One thing I realized could happen, and which I both dread and eagerly expect is Joe and Rachel getting together in this ’we both hate each other and ourselves but we’re also horny for each other’ relationship. So much potential for that after the gym interaction as the fall-out from this.

Smoochie

Or he just plays Toxic WITH A TASTE OF YOUR LIPS IM ON A RIDE! YOURE TOXIC, IM SLIPPIN UUNNNDDDERR!

Smoochie

Years later, Dorothy and Joyce announcing their engagement: “Still less gay—can Ah get my jacket back now?”

Grace Serenity

THAT'S what's really going to out them! "Hey! They're suspiciously acting less gay! OMG, they're ACTUALLY gay!"

E

(OutKast voice) Hey, alright now, alright now, fellas! YEAH! Now, what gayer than being gay?

Megh

Speaking of Amazi-Girl, it's uh, been a while since we got an update on her... I'm sure she's fine

William Lewis

Just go shower the tear gas off each other and go to bed together. Stop fighting the inevitable... Joyce's bed is best at this point. Tomorrow is soon enough for the fallout, enjoy the meantime. 💖

E

I don’t think we’re getting that pairing since it happened in walkyverse, but who knows

darklion

I'm sure they're on TV being pilloried by Fox News as everything that's wrong with college campuses today

Grace Serenity

We all know Sal doesn't stand in lines!

Grace Serenity

The whole dorm knew from the first month of the school year. They just didn't think Joyce would be capable of actually following through! I'm so proud of my disaster bis!

Fart Captor

C'mon girls. Even the people who don't KNOW have known for a while now

Grace Serenity

Dorothy. Sal doesn't react to ANYTHING. You know that!

Grace Serenity

"Whatever bullshit these two disaster bis are doing!"

Heatth

So, their alternative to "no hand-handing" and "no kissing" is "embrace each other while looking deep in the eyes". I mean, I guess it is not THAT much gayer than whatever they were always doing previously.

Fart Captor

I don't think she's gay or eats random jungle creatures though

C

Walky's been calling this since the first semester of college.

Kazo

We are sure Mary left BEFORE the kiss right?

Megh

Well apparently that's actually a little less gay

Mariah

Danny and sal happened in the walkyverse I am pretty sure any rule can be broken at this point.

C

Joyce: *looking at Sal leave, biting lip* ...We're in uncharted territory Dorothy...WE LIKE GIRLS NOW! Dorothy: *sighs* ...I noticed Joyce.

Railway Series Book Club

"ah mean, you two coulda been havin’ gay sex right here on the stairs, an’ it’d still be less fruity than yer usual antics"

Railway Series Book Club

"OH GOD IM HAVING GAY THOUGHTS ABOUT SAL NOW, I’M SORRY FOR BETRAYING YOUR TRUST LIKE THIS DOROTHY" "Joyce, we literally just cheated on our boyfriends, you should probably focus on an apology for that first."

5099 5618 v2.0

He literally once said "We get it! You're gay for Dorothy!"

Logibear

Danny follows behind and just whispers to Joyce "you're cheating on my best friend with my ex. That's how your relationship with her will have always started"

Acebender

they are terrible at this

MrShoggoth

Yeah but Danny is totally Otacon without the nuclear physics so it’s still a fantastic comparison that I’m angry I didn’t think of first.

Packy Anderson

I'm now trying to figure out how to nominate racism and Mario Kart for a bonus strip.

Simon Magid

...so two teens, caught up in a turmoil of hormones and in the middle of an actual fucking combat situation, commit an act of long pent-up passion previously held in check by social conditioning with a dash of identity issues. And have had maybe an hour or two to even think of how to cope with the consequences. This, apparently, makes them history's worst monsters.

Packy Anderson

It's been maybe an hour. She's fine. Really, it's long-term I worry about her.

Packy Anderson

And there was briefly a Joyce & Joe... - ish. Ok, it was just for dancing, but still...

Packy Anderson

Why hypothetical? It's pretty well established that Sal and Walky are siblings.

Sajuuk-Khar

That’s really weird and personal and pretty out of character for Hat Guy to do to her if anything, one would think his priorities re: personal attacks would be to go over to Walky’s room, just give him the world’s most shit-eating grin, and leave (Even that would be pretty weird and out of character, but at least it’d be consistent in terms of Danny’s general characterization and relations with the group)

Grace Serenity

I think the difference in timescale is throwing the paladins off. For us it's been months of build up, but Joyce only went on her date last night. Also, they've only kissed and are trying to figure out how to tell the boys. It's not like they've been fucking in secret (like they could keep a secret) for months! So obviously they're Hitler 2.0

Grace Serenity

Ironically, coming out of the closet is somehow less gay!

Grace Serenity

I think there was a cloud of tear gas between them. Also tear gas is pretty AOE, and would likely catch the counter protestors

Sajuuk-Khar

Gay, no (sorry, Marcie); but we cannot prove she would not chow down on iguana (I am not going to talk about snakes because some pervert will take it as a chance to mention FELLATIO. like a DEGENERATE.)

Simon Magid

Thank goodness we have all these moral champions to publicly condemn these two recreants and denounce them as the Whores of Babylon! Because they do not at all call to mind the cries of the ignorant and the bigoted!

Sajuuk-Khar

Okay I promised to engage a lot less and I’m going to I swear but like, Sal’s non-reaction gives life to a third stupid theory, one that is not “poly for some, emotional damage and Amber’s thighs for others” or “everything is terrible”, but rather “what if no one actually gives a shit, at all” like almost certainly not the case but if everyone’s reaction to the shocking revelation of “so Dorothy and I kissed and I think we’re going to have SEX!” is essentially “yep that checks out” that would be really fucking funny

hypermagical ultraomnipotence

to me this has the same vibe as joe right before he realizes that the "do list" has leaked, where he can tell the people around him are just a little bit off but he doesn't realize yet that his secrets are out there and it also reminds me of robin in shortpacked having confused awkward conversations right before learning that a tryst that she had with that congressman was viewable on youtube but it's probably nothing

Astariel

I honestly wouldn't be too surprised if everyone's reactions vary between "Called it," and "Wait, you weren't together already?"

Jay

It's really super easy to not cheat on your partner. Billions don't do it every day

Jay

Willis I need the next month of comics, please. I have money!

Silent

No way 1 month is enough, you're going to need at least the first storyline to get through all of this, maybe the second as well

Smoochie

It’s…Actually kind of possible for no one to give a shit, or at least that extends to a point that whispers happen around what’s happening—but no one tells Walky or Joe and just waits to see it all implode. Let’s take it later by layer. Jacob and Lucy? They have no reason to do anything but watch—Jacob has felt Joyce’s effect on relationships firsthand, so this might color his opinion on her even more. He does seem to like Joe, but it’s still messy and not his business. Look at his lack of action once he realized why Sarah is the way she is. Lucy certainly isn’t going to warn Walky if she suspects, and just watch Dorothy keep him in the dark. Speaking of Sarah? Yes she’s warmed up to Joe but Joyce is her first and foremost priority—she will feel kinda shitty about it, or be wrapped up in Tony, but it’ll take her a while to needle Dorothy and Joyce to have a moment of truth. Danny is kinda forced to mum’s the word as the only person in this mess he doesn’t care too much for is Walky, and if Sal probably would just wait for the truth to eventually come out, so will Danny—especially as it involves Dorothy and Joe since he cares for both. Billie as we’ve seen with Walky JUST recently, probably will hold her peace to give Dorothy and Joyce a long enough window to break the news. Billie is for the sapphics so yeah. That. Eventual obligation and duty might make her say something to Walky. Eventually. Dinah and Becky? They might learn too late to do anything because I can see these two actually feeling some kind of way about it all. Dinah has actually come to like Joe—and takes some issue about how Joyce gets autism and sheltered excused while being blonde and white and pretty. They buried the hatchet somewhat but Dinah has not forgotten. Becky may have commented that her hating Dotty is just a bit but Becky is also among the most moral—and I think disgust at how the two came together (and the ease of which ‘we’re girlfriends now’ from Becky’s point of view) gets to come to them as opposed to the TRIALS that Becky had to go through to have a girlfriend and freedoms to do that. Booster thinks pretty…little of Walky as possible so they probably are waiting in the wings for the mess. Amber was kind of…Waiting for all this, and every minute, day…Hour that Joyce and Dorothy take longer to tell their respective boyfriends is exactly what she wants. So…Yeah.

Silent

So can we all agree that the best/worst/funniest way this could go down is that Joe and Walky have spent the day discussing the possibility of opening up their relationships so Joyce and Dorothy can be together, working through their issues and fears about doing so. Only for the two of them to have gotten together behind their backs, completely ruining everything.

Edwin I Callahan

Good way to put the knife in. On the other hand. Started?

Harold

@Smoochie: Really interesting, well thought-out analysis! Although I have no idea who "Dinah" is, other than the fact that someone's in the kitchen with her.

Harold

Once again, Asma has been forgotten. She also knows. And may be the first person they see when they go back inside. (If they mention Asma in the next strip, kindly disregard the above!)

etherealDesign

what im looking forward to most in the coming blowup, i think, has to be the continuation of the dorothy v joe rivalry thats been on a rolling boil since at least "find different prey." every scene where we've gotten a dorothy who's protective and possessive has been super compelling (and hot!) and as messy as it'll be, i can't wait for her to gloat juuuust a bit here. especially since she's "only a seven." honestly, i wouldn't say one way or another whether joe DESERVES more comeuppance for the do list, i think he did an okay job of making amends and has genuinely grown up a fair bit since, but its always surprised me that only rachel really has any lingering resentment for it. dorothy had to interact with him for years when he wasnt much more than a teenage ogre and we already know shes really good at repressing her feelings. i think / hope / fear that she's going to throw those years of resentment back in his face now, and if she does i'm going to go grab the popcorn.

Harold

I'm not sure about this, if only because it was Joe himself (to his forthcoming chagrin, probably) who forced Dorothy to confront and come to terms with her love for Joyce and her own fluid sexuality. Of course, it's possible that Dorothy may end up approaching a weeping Joe and saying, "Thanks - I couldn't have done this without you," which would be both accurate and completely heartfelt but also gloating and mean. Hey, pass that popcorn, willya?

Harold

Next strip: Joyce: "Oh! And Asma! We almost forgot." Dorothy: "Right. So I think that covers everyone who knows so far." [They look at each other, then go in for more kissing.] Dina [who's been there the whole time]: "Excuse me - is this yet another secret that I should refrain from disclosing to anyone?" Joyce and Dorothy: "GAAA!!!" Joyce: "And Dina." Dorothy: "And Dina."

Justin Seifert

You know what i want? What I really want to see from both of these numbskulls? I want them to be HONEST with their partners. I don't want to see some shady nonsense where they try to hide this. Walky already knows Joyce wants Dorothy, even joked about it.. Joe knows Dorothy likes Joyce and even knows Joyce has a thing for Dorothy. Joe loves Joyce and may even be open to some sort of dual dating situation. I fear that if Joyce hides this and it blows up, that Joe will backslide after all this growth... I don't think he deserves that... as much as a playboy he is.. he never "cheated", he was up front and honest with his casual intentions. Walky I think can be pretty chill about this... I know tomfoolery makes for good content (I mean the comic is called "Dumbing of Age") but I would really like something wholesome and honest to come from this.... just a personal wish.

The Deliberate Myth

Wait... is that confirmed? Because I am going to now be spending time I really don't have, wondering which member of the cast would make for the best queer realization/relationship from Sal. Maybe if Danny does come out as transfemme, as many readers have speculated?

Smoochie

Hah I had a brain fart switching “Dinah” for Dina.

etherealDesign

oh, that's a great idea. i can see it. i do think that there's something to explore (which we've seen hints of but haven't really gotten the whole story) with dorothy having spent years around joe by dint of dating Danny and she definitely does not have warm feelings at all. she has way more reason/justification for not believing he's changed than rachel, since she actually had to put up with behavior of constantly objectifying all women but also her specifically. it would play towards a common theme of the comic of people genuinely changing(joe) / vs not letting people change(dorothy) and it'd be fascinating to contrast that with how much she+joyce have changed to get here.

C

Dina: Becky also requested I hand you three notes of possible reactions if you ever kissed another girl. Joyce proceeds to read three notes that just say : "*External screaming*" "*Squee*" "...Poly?"

Sajuuk-Khar

I think Dorothy kicking Joe while he’s down, right now, and especially being viscerally cruel about it? would be the main thing she could ever do to tank my opinion of her as a character! Like…I like Dotty a lot and I’ve been here for her journey but jeezus if that wouldn’t leave a sour taste all over the mouth lmao I could see it, and sure, she’s got justification, but I think it’d be a nasty, crappy choice to make! gross!! On the other hand if Willis REALLY likes the Paladins’ screaming, keening breakdowns in the main comments this is a way to keep them going forever

C

Yeah, no, absolutely. Open and honest communication is important in any relationship, whether at its beginning, middle, or end. Regardless of how it ends, they do NEED to have this conversation.

Sajuuk-Khar

Dina: Ah. As it is Dorothy, I have these additional notes. Joyce: “Oh fer cheese sakes OF COURSE it’s her.” … “Look Joyce babe I’m sorry but yer taste? Trash.” D:< NO IT ISN’T! … “I mean I guess tracin’ the freckles would be fun.” … “For about five minutes.” BECKY!! Dorothy: *face in hands, appearance of a boiled lobster*

Sajuuk-Khar

I think I believe more in a Dorothy who’s making that upcoming huge nervous grin face I thought might be her bringing up a threesome in the Down Bad era and going “hahahaha I was honest with myself! Like you said?? Remember?? Ooops” and is trying to extend something of an olive branch that may get pushed away hard in the midst of being hurt, which will keep that rivalry going and make it worse lol, without Dorothy being actively mean and petty about it in a way I dislike pretty hard lol But, she could decide now is the perfect time to be a shit! It might be something she feels she deserves and it would fit her trajectory! I just hope otherwise, I suppose

Harold

Alternate note from Becky: "Her?"

Sajuuk-Khar

In the event of a breakup, I still do not believe Joe will backslide at all. He’s extremely likely to be very sad; he might be a little angry or frustrated; he might feel happy for them! He might even feel like now he can admit that he nearly had sex with Liz and we’ll see that fallout! He might rebound with Liz, which would be a HILARIOUS DISASTER. But I don’t think he’ll backslide. Just can’t see it.

Harold

@Sajuuk-Khar: Oh, please don't misunderstand! If Dorothy does, in fact, walk up to Joe and say something like my line, I don't think she would be intentionally mean about it at all - she'd be 100% sincere. Which might make it even worse for Joe than if she gloated about it.

Sajuuk-Khar

The Smoochie analysis is solid, but my comedy version of this is one where Walky sighs and pats Dotty on the shoulders and goes to Amber’s room, with THUMPASPRUNG! echoing through the wings, and Joe somehow has a spreadsheet and a pair of glasses (you have to be a nerd to talk about spreadsheets, even if it’s a boning spreadsheet)

Sajuuk-Khar

@Harold: Ohhh lmao so we kind of can see the same thing, a Dorothy who is trying to apologize/connect and a Joe who either is angry enough to push it aside or is just full on Artax in the Swamps of Sadness (I feel like Artax is more likely, but heartbreak manifests many ways.)

etherealDesign

i would be super here for both options honestly! i just want to see their rivalry continue, their dynamic has interested me for quite some time and now seems like a great place to unpack it. she'd definitely be in the wrong if what i think will happen does happen, but hey - characters are allowed to be mean and petty sometimes. its not like the boys haven't been in the past, and im super ready to see what dorothy is like when she's finally admitting that she wants joyce and is willing to fight for her rather than only ever stepping aside. of course, seeing her trying to do that with her need to always be/be perceived as lawful good, trying to be gracious to joe, and fucking it up even worse, is also going to be incredible to watch.

Sajuuk-Khar

God actually that *would* be really, really funny Joe: “…Babe if you had waited like. An hour. :< I just.” Joyce: “SORRRRYYYY D:” Walky: “=_= I bet she initiated. The harpy.” Dorothy: “Walky!! D:”

Sajuuk-Khar

I do think the situationship with Joe is likely to get messy in both directions lmao, like, I’m the sicko who thinks Dorothy and Joe fit an enemies-to-lovers mold but they definitely could use more time in the Enemies oven if that’s the trajectory (It would actually be really interesting if Joe tries to be very sad and gracious and breaks up with Joyce, is despondent, and then Dorothy fucking like, needles him into getting back into pursuing Joyce either intentionally or unintentionally lmao) Also I can’t be too moralistic since I think a lot of my takes on Walky are just actually wanting to see him and Joyce fight like feral raccoons in a non-horny way lmao

Sajuuk-Khar

Asma: Every time you call me “Front Desk Girl” from now on I’m going to call you “Girl Who Wanted Her Sister To See Her Make Out” and “That Girl’s Sad Nebbishy Blonde Sub.”

Sajuuk-Khar

I change my idea to this, and him following Dorothy around playing this until she explodes at him Joyce is confused because she’s genuinely jamming to it 🤣

5099 5618 v2.0

Proposed addition to the Joyce & Dorothy playlist: "When the Party's Over" by Billie Eilish [1] [2] - - - - - [1] - Specifically for the conversation with Joe, which seems imminent. [2] - This would be after the Paramore / Zedd section

tifani

Ok this whole conversation feels gross. Like why are you ticking off who already knows when the only two other people who’s business it actually is (Walky and Joe) DON’T know and you both know they don’t know? I’m still team polycule but that involves actually TALKING to Joe and Walky. No more pda until you do. It’s extremely shitty and selfish to be so out in the open about it until they do and this all seems to come off to me as surface level mature when you’re avoiding the actual hard conversation. Get your asses inside and go tell your boyfriends. (And considering Sal is Walky’s SISTER and dating Joe’s roommate they should both be making Joyce’s third panel face for way longer).

tifani

Dorothy has no right to gloat here and she’d be a total asshole if she did.

tifani

I think it’s possible that no one gives a shit…except Joe and Walky (and Amber since she actively helped set this in motion). So no one cares except for everyone actually involved who care a lot.

Harold

@Sajuuk-Khar: Becky would be surprised at *just how much* she and Dotty have in common

Mariah

Dorothy singing misery business at joe has been in my brain for a while now.

Mariah

It would be funny but the paladins want blood... I mean consequences If they don't get yelled at by at least one person I will be suprised.

Mariah

worse than becky and ambers dads worse than kidnapping.. I had to stay off the main site for a while because jeez is there a lot of overreaction.

Mariah

very hayes code much purity culture.

Mariah

They reminds me of a conversation I had with a person that said cheaters should lose the right to vote as if our current dictator and lets be honest a lot of presidents did not cheat on their wives constantly. I feel like my problem with the moral policing is that it is never distributed evenly some are always going to get more punished than others. How many palidins are using "cheating" to cover the fact that they just really hate this ship or joyce and dorothy being bi? I don't think its all of them but some absolutly.

Mariah

yes but its also really easy to not consider people Irredemable monsters for cheating which is what the paladins have been doing.

Sajuuk-Khar

@Harold: I maintain that once things are chill, if they are ever chill again, the text conversation from my fanfic where Becky offers to teach Dotty how to “bottom properly” (and is immediately shut down by Dina with “no, you would turn her into a brat”) becomes viscerally canon lmao

Sajuuk-Khar

(God now I actually really want to see that, like, imagine if Joe is all “I’m gonna step aside” and Dorothy is like “…Wow, I didn’t think you were a quitter” and then it’s *back on*, fucking delicious)

zee

I propose lunch by Billie Eilish too. Set the mood

5099 5618 v2.0

@zee Oh, damn. Good one for when they finally get uninterrupted time to themselves, yeah

etherealDesign

she would be for sure, but every character in the comic has been a huge asshole at various points for the most part. she (and probably dina) are two notable exceptions, and id love to see them both have a turn. because im a trash goblin who craves mess (and thinks itd be a good story development)

Heatth

I mean, to be fair, Asma is not really on their social group. She is not going to tell any of their friends.

E

It’s not called “smarting of age”. Canonically, they’re like 18 or 19, the perfect age for them doing dumb shit that hurts people they care about because they were too horny to think things through. (Before someone jumps down my throat, yes cheating is bad and these two are being dumb)

Harold

@Sajuuk-Khar: I am now picturing Joyce dancing like Reed Rothchild in BOOGIE NIGHTS shimmying like a maniac in the recording studio as Dirk Diggler bellows "You Got the Touch"

Harold

If Sal did come out as queer, Marcie would probably have the same reaction that Becky is likely to have when she finds out about Joyce. (But also somewhat tempered by the fact that she, like Becky, is in a stable relationship, or as stable as a relationship with Malaya can be.)

Heatth

I assumed that is exactly what they are talking about. They are discussing the best way to "sort things" with their relationships, my understanding is they are trying to think on the best way to talk to Joe and Walky. They probably don't want to be too blunt about it to not hurt their feelings (much). Though, yeah, at that point they should probably just rip the band-aid and speak to them directly and immediately.

Sam G

@Tifani Yeah I agree. I'm trying real hard to keep an open mind till the storyline plays out but yeesh. I'm losing sympathy for them.