Gianna Interview - May poll result (Patreon)

There I was, staring at my posting plans for patreon/working through updating my timeline, thinking... I feel like I'm forgetting something...

And I WAS forgetting something the whole time.

The Woman Who Does It All – on being a retired influencer, wife, mogul, and mother before fortyMin Zhang

Readers, if you’re unfamiliar with Gianna Mäkinen –

Gianna: Beckett. Just for accuracy’s sake. I officially, legally, changed my last name a couple of years ago.

Oh, I absolutely love when an interview starts a little off-the-cuff. First and foremost, I apologize. I did know that you’ve legally changed your name, but I don’t believe you made a point of discussing it widely, so I’d figured you still liked for the general public to use your maiden name.

That’s a fair point – understandable. I didn’t broadly insist on people referring to me with my married name when I initially switched it, because at the time I was still very much an influencer. As you know, there are some incredibly zealous followers. And – that’s okay, because I signed up for that. In fact, I worked hard for it.

But my wife didn’t. My followers were already aware of my wife’s existence and her identity, of course, but as much privacy as she can have on social media is her preference.

But… now that you’re out of the influencer world, you do like to use Beckett as your surname?

Very much. In fact, I wear it proudly.

I’d, actually, love to dive more into this if you don’t mind?

Feel free. Let’s dive.

Taking a spouse’s last name can be seen as an antiquated tradition. And, often, a heteronormative tradition. Can I ask what went into the decision for you to take your wife’s last name? Especially given that you didn’t hyphenate your own? What kind of conversation was this between you and your wife?

To be entirely honest with you, my wife didn’t even know I was going to do it. She was entirely fine for us to continue on as we were. But it was a multi-faceted decision for me.

First and foremost, I knew we were planning on having children. And I can tell you that carrying Mäkinen – whether hyphenated or not – is a mouthful for anyone, let alone a child. In that way, it was a pragmatic choice.

And, emotionally, it went a lot deeper. The simple truth being: Riley Beckett is my favorite person in the universe. Someone I share a life with. Someone I, frankly, share my soul with. A last name felt like the only thing we hadn’t yet shared, and I craved that.

Which, if you knew me ten years ago, would probably make you laugh.

You mention knowing you from ten years ago – and, of course, in a technical sense I didn’t. But I will admit that I did follow you on socials! And, if you knew me, you would know that was not my norm; you were the only “influencer” I ever followed. But I really loved how your content never felt… inauthentic. How did you manage that? And now that you’re out of the game, can you tell me what percentage of it was authentic?

Naturally, I’m going to want to say all of it, of course.

But, realistically, it really was me. Sure, there were videos that I had to do multiple takes for, and there was editing that went into the content. So… maybe ninety percent was real? I took it really seriously, though. I didn’t partner with brands I didn’t actually stand behind. I refused to put my name on a product that I didn’t use, myself.

That’s not to put down anyone else who is out there, hustling. Because it is really fucking hard when the product you’re marketing, at the end of the day, is yourself. How to continue to be yourself, when you’re also trying to make a living doing this… it does take some serious self-reflection and some hard decisions.

And I was really fortunate. Because, financially, I had the freedom to take my time and build my brand. I didn’t have to make hard choices between turning down a deal and worrying about paying my bills.

Right. You didn’t discuss it often on your channels, but given your parents’ status, that makes sense. You know, speaking of your parents – they met in their twenties, both as models, correct?

Mhmm.

So, would you say that influenced your decision to go into fashion? Your Worthy line really dominated at fashion week in Paris this year; I have to imagine that your familial background played a part in that?

It did, but not in the way you’d think.

I’m not particularly close to either of my parents, and I spent very little time with them in my formative years. So, while they were in the fashion world, I was essentially entirely disconnected from it. I had a really keen interest in clothing and trends and designers, but really didn’t have hands-on experience or personal connections.

The familial tie that Worthy truly has for me is through my grandmother. My Mummo… she lives in Finland, and that’s where I spent several years of my childhood. She taught me how to sew, and that was where my love of creating started.

I really owe it all to her. Because when Worthy started, I was really just sewing designs, myself. Well, I owe it to her and my wife, who constantly convinced me I was capable of it.

I simply must circle back to your wife, given that she has come up again.

That’s fine with me, she’s one of my favorite topics.

God. Okay, see, as I said – I did follow you on socials in the past. And, as far as I can recall, you weren’t into relationships? I know I’m not the only one who was both curious and confused about the timeline of your relationship. Your mysterious, mostly off-screen best friend was around, and then she was proclaiming her love for you on a live video… what went on there?! I think the theory I’d seen floating around the most was that you two were in a non-monogamous relationship for years…?

Ha. No, that’s not accurate. Once Riley was mine, I was not going to share her. But you’re correct in recalling that I was not into relationships for a long time.

The timeline is simple. Riley and I met in college, and we became best friends. For years, that really was all we were. She dated people. I slept with people. But… we were always one another’s person. She would come over to my place after every date. We had our rituals together. For a very long time before we were romantically involved, we had a life together.

Then… ah, well, the lines blurred. To remain appropriate: we began a physically intimate relationship that mirrored our emotional one.

And, even though we didn’t quite know it at the time, there was never any true going back from that.

Who made the big move to initiate a change in your relationship after so long?

Well, that is a fun story, involving a mix-up at a holiday party and some not-safe-for-work items. Which, if we are being technical, was my doing.

However, Riley was the one who often drove us forward. Who voiced the things that needed to be said.

Was it weird? Starting to see your best friend in a new light?

It would have been, probably, if that was what happened for me.

Spoiler: it was not. That was what happened for Riley, but she’s more well-adjusted than I am, so she was fine.

But I’d see the light for Riley for a very long time.

The romance. Really, no one would have ever guessed what was playing out behind the scenes.

And that is exactly how I wanted it.

If you’d “seen the light” regarding your feelings for Riley for a long time, how did that work? How did you manage a friendship for so long?

It wasn’t difficult. I mean, there could be ups and downs; that’s just life.

But Riley’s friendship was never my consolation prize; I’ve cherished her in every iteration we’ve been together. Riley being happy is – it’s the most important thing to me. I’m lucky, because I’m the person that makes her the happiest, and I take that very seriously.

I think the thing that made it easy, though, is… even though Riley wasn’t in love with me, or aware of having feelings in any way, she prioritized me the same way I prioritized her. She was always my number one, but I was also hers. Even when she was dating or in relationships, I never doubted my place in her life. She never let that happen.

Okay, okay, before I start thinking about the definition of romance and being even more upset at the state of my dating apps – let’s close out your influencer past. You were still climbing in followers, had an impeccable reputation… and then you stepped away. I can’t imagine it was easy, after having spent a decade putting yourself into it?

You know, it was a lot simpler than you might think.

It was a lot easier than I would have thought, actually.

For a lot of reasons, but our oldest daughter – Anya – was the driving reason. I wouldn’t have featured her on my accounts even if I was still active on them, but… the parasocial relationships are very intense, whether or not I shared her on video. Riley and I could have worked out the privacy details as much as possible, but I didn’t want that for her.

I didn’t really have a “typical” childhood. Even when I was in Finland being raised by my grandmother and not in the spotlight myself, my parents were featured in photoshoots and fashion campaigns and then in some films throughout Europe.

Then, I was here in the States and going to boarding school, and… even when you have that experience secondhand through your parents, it can impact the way you interact with the world. The way the world interacts with you.

I’ve done a lot of contemplation around being a parent, and I might not be perfect, but I know that I want my girls to have the most normal lives.

It’s genuinely fascinating, to hear someone say they want their children to have an average life.

Like I said: I’ve experienced the other side of having access to a different world during my childhood.

And when I think about Riley’s childhood… being best friends with her sister, having freedom to make mistakes, but also being held accountable for her choices, developing a really strong sense of self because she got to be internally motivated and not face external pressures – beyond typical-life-things – that’s what I want for our kids.

That was truly very touching. Impassioned. It really sounds as though you’ve flourished in our new roles in life, which is saying something given how we’ve already discussed how successful your previous self was. Did you always know motherhood was for you?

laughter

Um… most definitely not.

Okay, that laughter is definitely something worth digging into, given that you just gave birth to twins last year, bringing your brood to four girls. But you didn’t plan on being a parent?

Correct. I wouldn’t be a parent, if the other parent involved wasn’t my wife. The only person I would ever go on this journey with is Riley. So, before we were together, the very idea of motherhood to me felt like a foreign concept.

Again, I can’t help but comment on the romance of it all…

It is romance.

But it’s also pure partnership.

Do I want to keep producing mini-Riley’s in this world and collecting them to shower them with my love? Yes.

But I’m not going to lie and say it’s not chaotic and loud and a lot to handle, having four children under eight years old. And the way both Riley and I manage it is knowing, without a single doubt, that we’re a team.

On the topic of teams – you mentioned just now that your wife is a twin. And you gave birth to your twins last year. It’s all so fascinating to me. Do you see any similarities yet, in how your wife and her sister are, to the way your twins are?

Well, Pippa and Annabelle are only fourteen months old. So, it’s difficult to determine which one of them is the driven and self-assured news producer, and which one of them is the scientific genius laughter

But, in all seriousness, our girls are hyper-aware of one another already, which is very interesting to see. Even in comparison to Anya and Emmi, who are also very close.

I hope they have the closeness Riley and Ellie have, when they get older. No matter what, there is a bond between them that… really goes deeper than anything.

The reality is, though, that I can’t predict anything about the people they’ll become. Even when it comes to Riley and Ellie – they are very close, and they do love one another deeply. But they’re basically as different as could possibly be. I’m looking forward to seeing how it all shakes out.

Going back to what set us off on the topic of your children – you said that your first daughter being born was what the biggest factor behind your decision to leave the public eye, but that there were also others?

The biggest reason behind the girls was Worthy.

I’d built up Worthy for several years while also maintaining my platform online, but Worthy was really my biggest love. It’s what I wanted to be able to give myself over to, professionally.

It took a while, though, before it was feasible to focus on Worthy as a fulltime business.

Given that you’ve always had a keen interest in fashion, what inspired you toward lingerie rather than regular clothing?

To be honest, I’ve always been very in-tune with my sexuality. And – in the most brutal of honesties – for a long time, it was one of the only ways I saw value in myself. One of the only ways a lot of other people saw value in me.

That shaped me in a lot of ways, both good and bad.

In a positive light, I’ve always been very in-tune with my sexuality, and with what I’m worth.

And, especially after forming closer relationships with people – Riley, especially – I felt the need to make other women feel that way about themselves, too. It’s why my luxury lines aren’t only made in every size, but are also designed with different body shapes.

Feeling sexy and desirable shouldn’t be limited to anyone that looks a certain way, and it also shouldn’t have anything to do with how anyone else sees you.

Every woman should feel… worthy.

Okay, finally: imagine you time travel. You see your college-self. You have the opportunity to tell her anything – what do you say?

I wouldn’t tell her anything.

She’s going to have the best life, one she doesn’t even think is possible. And everything she experiences along the way is so worth the journey. I wouldn’t want to ruin it for her. I don’t want her to wish she could fast-forward through all of the moments and memories trying to get here.

Because it was all perfect.

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