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Talking Simpsons - The Heartbroke Kid (Patreon)

Published:
2026-10-14 04:00:05
Imported:
2026-10
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"Oh, honey, please take this seriously. When people used to ask me how you were doing, I said, 'At least he's got his health.' Now you've got NOTHING!" - Marge Simpson

When Springfield Elementary fills its halls with snack and soda machines, Bart becomes a junk food junkie and experiences his first heart attack. With his young life at risk, only one thing can save him: a new character voiced by Albert Brooks.

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Comments

Echo Cimarron

The US military isn't the only one that (conditionally) likes to appear in movies for free advertising. On the commentary for Once Upon a Time in Mexico Robert Rodriguez said the Mexican military was going to provide a bunch of vehicles and guys for a few scenes... until they found out that part of the movie was about a Mexican general going rogue and attempting a coup. He had to settle for whatever old army surplus stuff they could find instead. Also, yes, Popeye is in the public domain as of 2025, which saw competing crappy low budget slasher movies Popeye the Slayer Man and Popeye's Revenge, which somehow has three sequels already?

katie lamont

My 2nd year of Spanish class in High School (2000/2001) made me incredibly nervous and anxious. I was always worried about being called on to speak. I was good at reading Spanish but speaking it was very difficult. The only way I made it through that class was getting 3 bags of M&Ms out of the school vending machine and slowly eating them in class.

Alex Irish

It isn't Chalmers' birthday, but it weirdly is my birthday, which means I'm a Libra like Skinner. This makes this upload the second time the Talking Simpsons network has uploaded on my birth date, the other being the 2018 What a Cartoon on House of Mouse, which I happened to commission. A new Talking Simpsons is the one bright spot for my dismal day.

Tyler The Destroyer

We are finally into the era where I was in high school and I was feeling like The Simpsons were being made for me For some reason, I remember this one so well I think it had repeat playing value for me mostly because anything that has to do with over eating or compulsion problems is something I relate too I’ve pretty much calmed down on snack foods and I have pretty good balance of eating/drinking in my life However, Pop has always been a big weakness for me I was one of the kids who was drinking nearly a 12 pack every two or three days I did not become enormous or was having teen heart attacks Because all we had were diet or zeros, I had a diabetic family member so there was Nothing but diet in the house and when you grow up drinking it, you start to acquire the taste Nowadays, I’ve moved towards a different type I drink, the “Coke Zero” version of a soft drink that Kroger‘s makes called “Big K” I’ve read the ingredients And from what I can see with the low sodium count (5 mg a can vs 180mg in regular Diet Coke) , I’m basically just drinking flavored seltzer lol I’m sure someday someone’s going to tell me it’s giving me all different types of cancers But for me, it’s the carbonation I love that’s why I’m never gonna be able to stop soft drinks I love the tingles on my tongue, and I love the explosive rumbles that it gives me in my stomach It makes you feel like you’re alive Now excuse me while I go get a can! All this pop talk is making me thirsty!

Jeremy Hawkins

The subject of childhood obesity is pretty interesting and is basically just a microcosm of the wider obesity crisis. It kinda does just boil down to whether you see the obesity epidemic as a personal issue or a part of a larger system that the average person doesn’t have that much control over. The fact that we call it an epidemic seems like a pretty good hint. Of course *that's* also not a thing where individuals awareness can effect change which is maddening. But yeah with kids in particular it’s pretty ridiculous to act like they just lack willpower, they lack control over their lives! Personally speaking, growing up my dad did the cooking until I was 8, then he got divorced with my mom. After that my mom still didn’t do any cooking, she ate lunch at work and ate crackers at home, and my dad just ordered pizza literally for the rest of my life. Then in middle school I went to home economics classes where the teacher forbade anyone from using salt ever and said that it doesn’t taste different, it just makes it less healthy. So as a middle schooler if I was eating at my mom’s house it was unseasoned George Foreman grilled chicken breasts with hot sauce. I don’t really think that kids (and adults) “develop” bad eating habits, I think they’re thrust upon you and we need a systematic change to society to change systematic problems… unless RFK jr finds a really gnarly worm in the well in his backyard that makes your brain good or they force kids to go into ozempic debt.

Blake R.

childhood obesity felt like a hot button issue of this era, the more that I think about it. Somewhere around this time an episode of House MD had also aired about a heavyset child suffering a heart attack while being made to exercise in gym class. There was also a Wife Swap where a healthy-minded mom had to live in a house with JUNK FOOD KIDS and banned their favorite snackfoods, leading to one of my favorite reality tv moments where one of the boys reveals he has a secret stash of Toaster Streudels.

Alistair Shand aka Bongo

Use Brits would never complain about the Line - we would moan about the queue 😳

ManTheCat

Talking Simpsons predicted it! Henry correctly assumed we would have public executions in the near future, it just wasn’t for Jimmy Kimmel. Glad you guys let us know it was 9/11!

F Shackleford

sadly, Portillo's has recently introduced the Oreo cake shake...

Ryan O'Reilly

Heartbreaking news: new rumors suggest universal has made negotiations with Warner Bros to bring TERFland (aka Wizarding World of Harry Potter) to the new UK park

Les Whinen

We had a Fruitopia machine in our high school cafeteria It was the healthy alternative to the Pepsi machine.

Jonathon

Bob describing his apple pie and soda lunch reminded me that for basically an entire school year, my lunch was a pizza bagel and rock star combo that I would get from the student store. This lunch was certainly not sufficient in normal circumstances, but I was also in sports and band, which meant long after school hours where that lunch would be my only sustenance for up to eight hours. The human body is a remarkable and terrifying machine.

Tyler M.

Hearing Bob describe his school's fast food lunch rotation really blew me away. This is especially because one of my best friends went to a tiny religious school that did the same thing. Our town didn't have a McDonald's or BK but we had a KFC and Long John Silver's. The idea of feeding kids the deep fried batter bits from Long John's on a weekly basis is a mind melter. This school also forced kids to speak in tongues, so let's just say nothing about it was on the level. I went to a public school in the same town and while we had vending machines, they were literally never turned on. Definitely odd, but likely for the best. That said, we would have these quarterly assemblies that were sponsored by Pepsi where they'd show us videos on how to deal with teen problems and the like. They always reminded me of the Troy McClure joke from Lisa's Wedding.

Joe Hodgson

Like Bob, I was one of those unjustly skinny individuals. I don't think I broke 120 lbs until after college, even though I'm 6' tall. I probably spent the entirety of my teens drinking almost exclusively soda and for lunch at school I would just buy snack cakes and other crap until high school...when we had Taco Bell in the cafeteria every day. Metabolisms are crazy. Now, I don't drink any soda and haven't for probably 15 years. Seltzer was how I kicked that addiction. I swear, with soda, if you can get off of it for a month or so that's all it takes as it can be hard to go back. And even when I do, I find I don't enjoy it like I used to.

Dennis K

In order to get my blood sugar down I learned to like Mountain Dew Zero, but I still can't handle seltzers. I once heard La Croix described as "drinking seltzer while someone yells the name of a fruit in another room" and I think that sums up the experience very well. Although maybe I'll try that Cherry Liquid Death Henry mentioned in another episode if I find a can.

nina matsumoto

Because you wondered: the band/singer Nena is NOT pronounced like my name. It's "nay-nah."