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Somehow the rewrite managed to sync up with the rest of the story nearly perfectly. The original chapter 9 is Dahlia and Marielle in the greenhouse, and although it needs some minor tweaks, I don't think it needs a complete rewrite, which means next week should be entirely new chapters! (assuming I don't find sometihng major while reviewing the remaining chapters)

I think the rewrite was totally worth it. Better characterization, worldbuilding, and setup; It'll just make the story stronger. I hope you guys enjoy.

Kathrine bowed politely before immediately heading over to the nearest chair. I, on the other hand, was a tad more hesitant. My eyes swept across the room, glancing at the plethora of alchemy books stacked on the shelf behind my aunt, the collection of maps piled up beside her desk; However, what really drew my attention was the ornamental longsword which hung just behind her desk. The one that was still dripping blood. 

When my gaze finally returned to my aunt  I saw she was glowering at me. “Sit,” she growled. “I won’t tell you again.”

“Right,” I muttered, slipping into the other chair.

As soon as I was in place Aunt Helena leaned forward, resting her arms on the heavy desk and locking her fingers together. “I need you two to go to the capital. Tonight.”

I blinked in confusion before glancing over at Kathrine. Even though she was trying her best to maintain a neutral expression, I saw the faintest hint of a frown flicker across her face. At least I wasn’t the only one who was confused. 

“If you needed us to go to Crownhold, why call us back to the mansion? It would have only taken us a couple of hours by rail if we’d gone directly from Brighthome,” Kathrine asked. “Why not just send an encrypted message by crystal?”

“Because three days ago someone somehow managed to plant, and detonate, a bomb in the grand council’s meeting chamber,” Aunt Helena growled. 

“I beg your pardon? What?” I exclaimed. “How? Don’t all the major houses have a contingent of guards on station there at all times? How could anyone sneak through?”

“If we knew that, I wouldn’t have called you here,” Aunt Helena growled, slamming her fist down on the desk in frustration. “Both the Morewin and Tarnin representatives are dead, while the representatives from Vicini and Castille, along with my brother Andreas, were poisoned by some sort of toxic gas that was released in the explosion. They’re all still in critical condition.”

“Still? They must have at least one copy of the complete treatise on toxins somewhere in the capital, right?” I asked.

“They have several. Whatever they were exposed to isn’t like anything we’ve encountered before,” Aunt Helena replied, before pushing herself to her feet so she could pace behind her desk. “This has left me in a very awkward position. The great houses haven’t been on the greatest terms for several years now, the council was maintained out of necessity rather than any sense of comradre, and since half the council was poisoned, suspicion has fallen on us.”

“Despite the fact that Uncle Andreas was exposed along with the others?” Kathrine asked.

Aunt Helena snorted. “It seems that the other houses believe I wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice my family if it helped me achieve my goals.” 

“That’s because it’s true,” I muttered, which immediately drew a murderous glare from my aunt. “If the situation demanded it.” 

We locked gazes for a moment before my aunt turned away and continued pacing. “Perhaps… but only if the situation demanded it,” she said. “And besides, if I wanted to get rid of the other houses I wouldn’t be stupid enough to strike at the council, which only serves as a way for the great houses to discuss and settle inter-house conflicts, but I wouldn’t had made it so blatently obvious we were behind it.”

“Okay, that’s fair,” I admitted. “That still doesn’t explain why we’re here.”

Helena stopped pacing, and turned to face Kathrine and I. “You’re here because the other houses want to put together a joint task force to investigate the incident, and deal with the perpitrators, and in order to prove our sincerity I’ve decided to send someone who’s both known to the other houses, and trustworthy,” she explained.

“Well, that explains why Kathrine’s here,” I said. “But I’m neither of those things.”

My aunt sighed. “You’re here because I need to send a master alchemist to analyse, and if possible, make an antidote for the poison,” I opened my mouth to ask a question, but before I could she shot me a seething look. In that moment I became certain that if I tried to interrupt her, or continued to show her disrespect, I’d probably find out how her sword ended up coated in blood. I shut my mouth. “While I could send Mariebelle, she rarely steps out of the lab, and whoever I send will probably need to participate in field work. While I hate to admit it, you’re probably the best one for that job.”

“Fair,” I replied quietly.

“Still, why all the secrecy? Surely the entire capital must know about the attack by now,” Kathrine asked.

“They don’t,” Aunt Helena grunted. “While the guards weren’t able to catch whoever was behind it, they were able to cordon off the building before anyone else found out. Most people think the explosion was just a failed attack on the council building; If they found out it was a success, it would cause unease at best, and full-on panic at worst. It’s best if no one found out until the investigation was over, and we already had the culprits in custody.”

“If you want us to leave tonight does that mean…” I started hesitantly.

“I’m sending you by gate,” Aunt Helena said. “I’ve already asked Terrence to crack the vault and retrieve several large stones to power it.” 

“So you’re sparing no expense,” I muttered quietly. 

“Now, like I said, your job is to investigate the scene, neutralize the toxin if possible, and cooperate with the other houses, but in addition to that I want you to keep Monique and Pierre appraised of all your progress,” Aunt Helena said.

“They’re coming with us?” Kathrine asked hesitantly. “Why?”

“Because whoever’s behind this went out of their way to make it look like we’re involved, and I have no intention of taking that laying down,” Aunt Helena explained. “While I fully intend to support this taskforce, I expect there to be too much squabbling to get things done. Pierre and Monique are going to take control of our local forces, and lead a seperate, clandestine investigation. If they find the culprits before you they’ll crush the opposition, and bring those in charge back here so I can have a discussion with them. Don’t worry though, they’ll leave enough of the origanization intact to satisfy the other houses.”

“And if we find them first?” Kathrine asked. 

“Then politely ask for permission for us to take the lead in the interrogations. I’m sure I could find a few interesting compounds to test on the prisoners,” my aunt replied.

I bit the inside of my cheek in order to fight off the urge to make a snide comment. “If you want me to investigate and possibly neutralize this poison, I’ll need some supplies,” I said instead. “Do I have permission to grab some things from the greenhouses before we leave?”

“Take whatever you need, but do it quickly,” Aunt Helena replied. “Our scheduled portal window is for two hours from now, and I don’t want to have to reschedule.”

“Two hours from now? What were you going to do if we arrived late?” Kathrine asked.

“Take the cost of the stones out of your operating budget for the next year,” Aunt Helena growled. 

“Uhhh… Just out of curiosity, how much would a set of magic stones capable of creating a portal all the way from the estate to the capital cost?” I whispered to Kathrine.

“You’d have to sell off your lab and most of your collection of rare books to pay for them,” she replied quietly.

“Ahhhh….” 

“If you two are done whispering, then get out of my office,” my aunt hissed. “Be at the portal in two hours, and make sure you report in daily. Got it?”

“Of course mother,” Kathrine replied, rising to her feet and bowing smoothly. I didn’t show the same respect, instead choosing to shoot to my feet and evacuate the office as quickly as possible. 

“Can you watch my stuff?” I asked as soon as we left the office. “If this toxin isn’t in any of our manuals, then it must be rare, so I’m going to have to pick up some equally rare herbs to test with. I’ll have enough to worry about without having to carry my bag.”

“Are you really going to need that much?” Kathrine asked suspiciously.

“Probably not, but as far as I’m concerned it’s better safe than sorry. If I have some extra left over, that’s just a bonus,” I told her. “Do you need anything for your serum?”

“Then I’ll make the arrangements,” Kathrine replied. Her eyes shifted back to the dining room for just a moment, before flicking back to me. “We’re wasting time. Dinner was almost over when we were excused, and we still have a lot to do. Is your bag packed?”

“Of course. I never bothered unpacking it,” I snorted. “I don’t like being here any longer than necessary. You know that.”

“I do,” Kathrine agreed. “I’ll send that maid to pick up your bag and bring it to portal. Go get whatever you need from the greenhouses and meet us there as soon as you can.”

I nodded and started to turn away, but paused and glanced back at her. “Do you need anything? ” I asked.

Kathrine sighed and rubbed her head for a moment. “Rubra,” she finally said. “And ashwood.”

“I’ll make sure to grab them.” I said as I handed her my bag. “I’ll be back soon!”

“Be quick,” she shouted after me. “And don’t let Marielle distract you!” 

“I know, I know,” I muttered as I descended the staircase three steps at a time. A couple of the servants glanced my way, but despite the fact that I wasn’t following standard etiquette not a single one dared say something, or approach me. 

I sprinted out the door and turned towards the row of greenhouses, just barely peaking over the sculpted hills in front of the house. 


Despite herbs being the lifeblood of house Salvenum, the greenhouses weren’t keep anywhere near the main residence. There were a lot of extremely rare, and extremely dangerous plants raised in there, so most people required either permission from an Elder, or an escort to even enter the grounds. 

Thankfully, I wasn’t most people. 

I mentally made a list of herbs I’d need as I ran down the paths. It would take some time for me to harvest and store them all properly to maintain freshness, but if I knew anything it was herbcraft. 


The guards didn’t even bat an eye as I came jogging up. In fact one of them even opened the door, and nodded politely towards me. I returned the gesture but didn’t stop, rolling up the sleeves of my outfit as I strode into the impressive glass house.

“Time to get to work,” I muttered to myself.

Comments

M R

Again I understand what you are going for but the aunt is being rather stupid in how she’s talking to the person she needs to prove her and the families innocence. Overall this works a lot better than the original in giving us a background to what’s going on and it shows just how screwed up the family is. I still would expect a bit more respect for the person who can kill you just by shaking hands

Wombat's Writings

It's true, both this and the previous chapter could be tightened up a little. I might do another pass on both of them later this week, but I'm overall MUCH happier with these two than their previous versions.

M R

I have to fully agree they work much better and definitely improve just how bad the family is