Big Daddy Dispatch: February 2026 (Patreon)

Dispatch One Hundred and Four, January 29th, 2026

Greetings WHM Family!

Welp, it’s cold as shit out, America’s ever-steepening decline into facism continues unabated and the job market isn’t looking too great either…Anybody up for some White Guy Karate? We figured you might be. Our own Eric Szyszka thought the best way to spend the shortest month of the year would be to write a love letter to one of our favorite sub-genres and we couldn’t be happier to do it! You gotta find joy where you can folks. See below for the full line-up. 

Oh, and do be sure to tune into the return of On-Screen live this Monday at noon/eastern on our YouTube channel to find out what we’re doing for Listener Request Month! And as always, we just want to take a moment to thank everybody who called or wrote in, it’s an amazing crop to choose from so fingers crossed we don’t get another Ultraviolet or something! Or maybe fingers crossed we do? We never know what you people want!

Banner Credit: We Hate Movies Logo by Felipe Sobreiro

Image Credit: The Godfather of White Guy Karate, doing what he does best in this month’s We Love Movies Episode, Bloodsport (1988)

WINTER TOUR! GET SOME SUN AND THEN GET YOUR COATS ON!

Holy shit, this month our 2026 tour kicks off in one of our favorite cities talking about a banger of a movie that we’ve neglected for too long! 

On February 22nd we return to sunny Los Angeles and the Hollywood Improv to talk about one of the most requested titles of all time, Broken Arrow (1996)! This is the movie where John Woo fell in love with John Travolta…also, Christian Slater is there! 

We take a little break and then bundle our parkas for the mid-west where, on March 20th, we’ll be in Minneapolis, MN to talk about Conan the Barbarian (1982) at the Varsity Theater! We’ve never been to Minneapolis (home of the Walshes), and we can’t wait to meet a new crop of WHM fans, eat your strange food, and sample your wares, all while visiting one of the strongest, most resilient cities in the country! 

Then, two days later on March 22nd, we’ll be in the great city of Chicago for a rowdy live episode on Tom Hanks’s sexual awakening in Big (1988) at the Den Theatre! This is going to be a banger of a live ep and we always slay in Chicago, so you won’t wanna miss it! 

All tickets are available on our Tour Page! Don’t delay and risk losing out on these shows!

LAST MONTH ON WHM

Episode 839 – The Family Plan 2 (2025) 

What better way to start off 2026 than with a sequel that no one saw to a movie no one saw...that we also covered...starring Mark Wahlberg. Should Wahlberg make the move over to PVOD action and adventure movies or is his ego still too big? Does the villain in this movie have any plan beyond having more power? Any desires, man? Did they add the Christmas stuff to give Apple a better reason to actually market it for holiday audiences rather than just flush it down the stream at the end of January? Get ready for some heavy-duty parkour tutorials.

Episode 840 – Tron: Ares (2025)

The Movies We Saw ‘25 train keeps chugging along as the gang goes back into the future, and the digital worlds of TRON, as new leader, Jared Leto goes to work in the TRON world doing some industrial espionage from sadistic corporate king Dillinger (Evan Peters) while rival tech overseer Greta Lee finds a way to make all digital things permanently physical, a digital breakthrough Dillinger is willing to kill to have for his own. Aren’t TRON movies supposed to take place inside TRON worlds? Bigger question: why are we still asking Jared Leto to star in movies considering all those verifiable stories we’ve heard? And look-LOOK ME IN THE EYES RIGHT NOW!-where THE FUCK is Bruce Boxleitner and his very large check? You know who he is, don’t play. Just give us the Nine Inch Nails soundtrack and we’ll leave happily.

Episode 841 – One Battle After Another (2025)  (Patreon Only)

For the lighter side of Movies We Saw ‘25, the fellas headed out to Baktan Cross to catch up with their friends in the French ’75 as their fight with the nefarious Colonel Steven J. Lockjaw continues on as he attempts to apprehend Bob and Willa Ferguson. Is this the best P.T. Anderson movie? What exactly went down in the Primrose Path Motel? When will Warner Bros. start mass-producing daddy-daughter ambient-music-identifiers for sale? Great to know that P.T. Anderson has seen Support the Girls and knows how amazing it and Regina Hall are.

Episode 842 – Jurassic World: Rebirth (2025)

DUNCAN!!!!

For our latest excursion into Jurassic Something, Andrew, Chris, Steve, and Eric went to the secret R&D island with poor Gareth Edwards, Scarlett Johansson, Mahershala Ali, and Jonathan Bailey as they hunt for samples and specimens and occasionally get eaten up. Why, why, why are we still doing this? What happened to clone girl and Christ Warrior Chris Pratt? Can we put a little sauce on this video game plot to add just a little flavor? The entire family that comes along and doesn’t die at all did not add much flavor, just being honest over here.

Episode 843 – Regretting You (2025)

As we come to the end of Movies We Saw ’25, we took a stroll into modern-day, country-tinged suburbia to witness the strangest love triangle(s) imaginable, involving Alison Williams, her widowed former brother-in-law (Dave Franco), and her dead car (Scott Eastwood). Why are they making so many car jokes?! How much did AMC shell out for this much ad placement? Does everyone in this world get married before they can legally drink? Clancy Brown is in this too, but just to have cancer and give money. Boo!

WHAT ARE WE WATCHING?

This is a space for us to talk about some NON-We Hate Movies-related content that we've shoved into our eyeballs in the last month: TV, Movies, Cartoons, and Sports (maybe?). Just about anything that isn't pornography.

Andrew: 

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977): Another title checked off the Home Media Mountain project. Such a fabulous film. I watched the Director’s Cut, which is really the only way to watch it. Seeing the inside of the ship at the end of that altered version? Get outta town. I think this is one that gets kinda swept under the rug when talking about the larger Spielberg picture, and it’s understandable. But, man, go back and check this one out if you’ve never seen it, or if it’s been a while. 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Turtles Arrow 4K Set (1990-1993): I was given a nice little gift card for Christmas and used it to pick up a few box sets, this being one of them. All three films look and sound fantastic. The first film’s disc also contains a “Hero” audio track where they replace every use of the word “ninja” with “hero” to avoid the U.K.’s infamous “Video Nasty” list. The second film still rocks. Third one’s still stupid. A great time all around. 

Star Trek: The Next Generation Films 4K Set (1994-2002): This was the other set I purchased with that gift card. I’d re-watched Generations recently for an appearance on the Authorized podcast, but I was so glad to go back. I really do love it. I also love First Contact. Insurrection played a bit better for me this time around, the whole forced relocation storyline is sadly still super-relevant today, but I just wish it had more space battle stuff. Nemesis on the other hand, has a lot of cool space battle stuff, but the rest of that story is dumb a dog shit. I still recommend this whole set. Hell yeah. 

Primate (2026): Me and a buddy checked this out in-theaters and hot damn, this was fun. Sure, I was stoned out of my gourd, but I honestly think it may be the best killer monkey/ape/chimp movie since Monkey Shines. The kills are great, there are some instances of real ass-clenching tension, and the performances are competent and fun. The movie understands it’s a ridiculous killer chimp movie and acts accordingly. Support good studio horror like this in theaters! Because the other side of this is…

Marshmallow (2025): When you hear me talking about what I see as a real lack of inspiration and competence in a lot of low-budget, indie horror, I’m talking about films like this. I will say, Marshmallow is more competently constructed than a lot of North American indie horror I’ve watched on Shudder recently, but it’s still just a toothless, nothing film that sucks you in with a good trailer and the appearance of aping 80’s horror nostalgia and then delivers absolutely nothing. Skip this. 

Chris: 

Dracula/Kontinental ‘25 (2025): Of the many major artists that have been brought to international attention by the Romanian New Wave, Radu Jude may be the most daring. He moved quickly from modern family melodramas (Everybody in Our Family) to wondrously dense historical dramas (Aferim!, Scarred Hearts) to a recent line of unclassifiable, uproarious dark comedies, which climaxed with 2023’s chaotic, brilliant Do Not Expect Too Much from the End of the World, all while also putting out a plethora of experimental work, shorts and docs. Dracula, the more remarkable of his two 2025 features, rightly suggests the death of creativity fully coming to pass with AI, going as far as to use the technology in the film in the only morally correct way to do it: rendering a series of different Draculas that introduce themselves and then quickly invite the audience to suck their cock. As with much of Jude’s work, it’s difficult to put into words what makes the film so engaging and frankly invigorating, but it could coast alone on being the most genuinely fruitful use of AI in film I’ve seen thus far. Jude’s dalliance with AI may even be worrying if this year hadn’t also brought along Kontinental ’25, a far more sobering yet still funny and stylish character study about a bailiff in modern-day Cluj who is consumed with guilt when an eviction she oversaw leads to suicide.  Equally sickly and sticky, this modestly scaled drama suggests Jude taking all the lessons learned from his different exercises back to the world of the modern family where he started his career. That seems somewhat confirmed by news that he will next helm adaptations of Diary of a Chambermaid and Frankenstein, two views of familial patterns translated by elemental outsiders. Can’t wait to see both of them.

Cover-Up (2025): In subject, you could not ask for a bigger feast than the work and life of the legendary Seymour Hersh, the journalist who helped expose the My Lai massacre, as well as the innumerable, inhuman crimes at Abu Ghraib, the Watergate scandal, and many of the secretive doings of the Central Intelligence Agency. The most exciting moments in the film are Hersh’s own discussions with his directors, Laura Poitras and Mark Obenhaus, about why he won’t talk about certain things, leading to him trying to quit at one point. That speaks to the heart of Hersh’s genius, which is fundamentally entangled with his skepticism, his careful process of trust and translation, and there is sadly only so much of those moments here. Perhaps that’s asking too much of an all-time-greatest journalist who is still working the toughest story – Gaza, Ukraine, and Nord Stream are all touched on – but it makes for a less probing film than Poitras’ other recent features all the same. Less is made here of his place in the Seth Rich conspiracy or his doubts about not covering Nixon’s spousal abuse allegations but plenty is made of his mistakes and doubts, ranging from his coverage of Assad’s regime in Syria to his relationship with the New York Times. Good stuff, glad it was made.

Dry Leaf (2025): A big screen really should be sought out for this sort of experience but I really would press you to see this in any form you can, though I doubt its many wonders would be fully visible on an iPad. Who knows? What must be said is that the third feature by the Georgian filmmaker Alexandre Koberidze, his second rendered in 144p low-res, is the kind of plot-less adventure through the greatness and bleakness of every-day life – a father and his invisible friend search for his daughter – that quickly refocuses love of movies on a love of watching and remembering, but startlingly figures in the element of uncertainty to memory by rendering his images only ¾ recognizable. Would have watched it for another three hours happily, but I appreciate the relative brevity. Lots of great cats and hills and soccer fields.

Eric:

Out of Control (1985): A group of 80's teens graduate from high school and do what everyone does on graduation night: charter a private flight to go to a private island. The private island is owned by one of their dads so I guess it's not that crazy... What is crazy though is crashing into the ocean. Pretty good "drowning" scene. Don't worry, they survive, but end up on a deserted island used for drug smuggling. This becomes a teens vs. drug runner movie but with plenty of navel gazing. Shout out to the drug runners escorting the kids into their custody while saying "come, come, hot soup." Hot soup indeed. Warning: sexual assault is in this movie. Also in this movie? Sherilyn Fenn! 

Nowhere to Run (1993): White Guy Karate month supplemental. This would probably also make a good episode. You got JCVD, you got two little kids, one of which is Kieran Culkin, commenting on JCVD's "big penis," yes, that happens. No, I am not making it up. Yes, he's a kid in this movie. Yeah, it's fucked up. You understand, while hiding from the law in the arms of Rosanna Arquette, her children see JCVD's hog while bathing. Yes, this leads to the penis discussion scene, which is, yes, at a dinner table. 

The Prey (1983): This was almost good. I really like when horror decides to intercut with nature footage. This reminded me a lot of In A Violent Nature (2024) in terms of nature photography. The problem here is it's not used for anything. We even have a similar murderer but instead of getting those lumbering shots in the woods - we just cut to a snake. Then we cut to a spider. It's less In A Violent Nature and more Planet Earth in these moments. Some OK kills. Not a lot here! 

Fight or Flight (2025): The Josh Hartnett-aissance might be cresting and rolling back to the beach. This isn't great. It does have fun with violence, which I appreciate. It's a big, dumb action movie that takes place on a plane. Pretty sure loud killings wouldn't go unnoticed like they do throughout this thing. So suspension of disbelief is a big problem. Also is it just me or is Josh Harnett dressed exactly like Karl Urban would be if he starred in this? Did he bow out and Hartnett was a last minute addition? It just all feels so Karl Urban to me! 

The Smashing Machine (2025): Playing catch up here. I really liked Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in this and it's about time he tried something more dramatic. Beyond his performance I just don't think there's a ton of movie here. Now that we successfully pressured him into a real movie, let's pressure him into playing a villain next, please! 

Steve: 

Train Dreams (2025): Did a little bit of Oscar catch-up last night and really enjoyed this one. It’s very pretty, very contemplative, and has some terrific performances by Joel Edgerton, Kerri Condon, John Diehl (unrecognizable!), and the great William H. Macy fishing for an Oscar himself here. The work stuff in the beginning is about two times as interesting as the stuff in the second half, but it all works and washes over you like an awesome wave. It’s lower on my contenders list, but certainly better than Hamnet.

Blue Moon (2025): I’ve been dragging my feet on this because while I like Linklater something about this and Nouvelle Vague coming out in the same year made me roll my eyes a little and watching this (and enjoying it) I finally understood why. It’s not a race, man. You can do a second, third, and fourth pass on your script to get it right, you can take the time to get things just the way you want them if you’re not prepping another movie at the same time. Hawke is absolutely phenomenal here and if he wins his award for this it’ll be well deserved, even the weird Frodo-ing of him didn’t bother me too much. What did bother me was excessive cutting to try to avoid the stagey-ness of the premise, which I think is jarring and a mistake. Also, and I think she’s capable of good work, Margaret Qualley is a huge miss here and you kind of need that character to sing. 

A Desert (2025): Not everything is Oscar bait, thank you very much! This one is decisively not so. Weird, pervy, and owing a large debt to David Lynch. This is a cool, nasty little movie that will stick with you and goes to surprising places, so I’ll not spoil much here. Something to watch after 10pm if you’re in a weird mood. 

Death by Lightning (2025): A real hoot! Just a fun, brisk mini-series about the assassination of Garfield (the president, not the cat). Michael Shannon plays him with a gentility that makes you root for the doomed bastard, very Un-Shannon-y in a very good way. Matthew Macfadyen’s got a similar striving doofus energy that Succession fans will recognize, but finds some chilling depth to the assassin that is a very welcome departure for him. Though Nick Offerman and Shea Whigham steal the show and every goddamn scene they’re in is such a delight, Offerman in particular is having a blast as Chester A. Arthur. The rare TV Mini-Series that might be one episode too short, but I’ll take it! Highly recommended.

PATREON MAILBAG LIGHTNING ROUND

Here's a fun space where folks on Patreon get to ask us Questions directly. This month's entry comes from

JR from Minneapolis, who asks:

“My friend and I have a theory that every movie is slightly improved if it has a pig-man in it. Part man, part pig. Is this a dumb theory? My question: do you have any dumb Easter egg scenes, situations, or character tropes that will elevate an otherwise terrible movie? (Eg a good dummy, or a pigman).”

Andrew: One thing that’ll perk me up, a ripping electric guitar score. I was watching a truly awful, F-grade martial arts/private detective movie a few days ago, Low Blow, which is not worth your time in the slightest, and it had almost zero redeeming qualities, except: a totally rockin’ electric guitar score. So even while I was watching dull fight choreography, in a film led by a total nothing lead, that guitar score kept me engaged.

Chris:  I’m not sure if this is exactly what you’re looking for but it seems like it’s in the wheelhouse: a movie made after 1999 gets extra credit for having ample squib work. Most violence in films made after the advent of sound is at once badly directed/choreographed and morally questionable in a number of ways. Add to that the anti-labor, anti-art movement to have computers do more and more of the work of making movies and really, there’s very little violence worthwhile to speak about. Squibs, to me, are one of the final relics of filmmakers offering a morsel of realism in the barrage of sound, noise, and movement that are modern action films. And the elimination of them from most movies renders many of these films cold and soulless to me. It might sound silly or petty, but to have just that one moment of realism to signal the death of a character, major or minor, makes a difference to me, a final, unruly blast of liquid crimson in comparison to a concert of clean digital mist, clicked and added with barely a thought. That difference matters so much to me, and it should to you too. It’s also one of the reasons, though certainly not the most prominent one, that Michael Bay’s Ambulance is a masterpiece.

Eric: I hear you, I also love when older character actor "pigmen" show up in movies and TV. A great dummy goes a long way too. This example is not a terrible movie, but the dummy ending of Fulci's Don't Torture a Duckling (1972) is absolutely incredible. I wasn't vibing with the film as much until that moment. Honestly, I am easy to please. Put a dummy drop in literally any movie, good, bad or otherwise, and I am clapping like a seal. 

Steve: As far as pigmen go, I don’t think I can recall one outside the Seinfeld episode, at least in movies. In literature, one of the first novels I ever read was Paul Zindel’s The Pigman, who in retrospect was likely trying to bone both of those teens he let hang at his house or possibly watch them bone. What a pig! Right? 

For the real question, some things I really enjoy seeing in movies: A good apartment can make up for a poor story, some built in bookshelves? Who gives a shit what they’re talking about in front of them! I also dig shotgun stuff. Some dude taking revenge on his wife/daughter/grocer’s killer…Sure, OK. Hold on, does he have a shotgun? One ticket please! Oh, and a big one for me, which I’ve definitely talked about on the show before is a failed clone. Some bigshot scientist thinks he’s got the whole human cloning thing down pat, but then whoops, this dude happens to be gray for some reason. Maybe his skin starts to fall off and he looks helplessly at his creator like “why is this happening to me?” I fucking love that stuff.   

FEBRUARY SCHEDULE

Say what? The schedule in advance?! It's the least we could do! By subscribing to this newsletter, you get a sneak peek at what we're putting out for February:

February 3rd  – The Hunted  (1995)

February 10th  – Ninja II: Shadow of a Tear (2013)

February 17th – Replicant  (2001)

February 24th – Out for Justice (1991)

Patreon Episodes:

February 5th – We Love Movies: Bloodsport (1988)

February 12th – Once in a Lifetime: Fatal Defense (2017)

February 13th – MELR0210: 90210: “So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Goodbye” (s4 e1), Melrose Place: “Bye, Bye Baby” (s3, e16)

February 17th  at 8pm EST – WHM After Dark: Come with your questions at the ready and spend an hour hanging out with the gang!

February  19th – Animation Damnation: The Karate Kid: “Homecoming” (s1, e3)

February 20th – The Gleep Glossary: Kyp Durron

February 26th  – The Nexus: TOSTAS: “The Jihad”(s1, e16) TNG: “Darmok” (s5,e2)

February 27th – Q1 Synchable Commentary: Kickboxer (1989)

PATREON RSS BUGIf you’re having trouble with the RSS feed updating or episodes not appearing in your app, Patreon has acknowledged this bug and they have a fix: "Try unsubscribing and re-subscribing via your app by re-entering the unique RSS feed you were given and is on our Overview section of the Creator page. Or try using a different podcast app or RSS feed reader." Please consult this page and contact Patreon Support if the problem persists. We apologize for any inconvenience you’ve experienced on Patreon and truly appreciate your continued support!

UPCOMING NEWS AND PROMOTION

In case you missed it we opened our Patreon Shop with our very first offering, our virtual live show from 2021 on Terminator: Dark Fate is now available for purchase! This is a killer show from the dark times and it’s safe to say we were still suffering from QUARANTINE MADNESS. If you missed it and always wanted to listen, here’s your chance! You get a new introduction recorded by us, the show from that night, and an audio file of the whole thing so you can enjoy the show again on the go!

On Screen Live will RETURN this Monday at Noon with a live drawing for Listener Request month! We’ll also have some more stuff planned so subscribe on our YouTube Channel to never miss a broadcast! 

We also have all officially sanctioned VHS Trailer Game episodes up to this point. Eric has also put out great clip packages likeWTF Exorcism with Marc Merrin, Dr. Loomis is the Worst Doctor, Dilf Den, George Bailey as Michael Meyers,John Wick-Mentary,  Toby Jones in Bee Movie, Sausage Claus, David!Muppet Hitchcock Presents, and many more! You can also watch the entirety of ourWitchboardepisode! Complete with visual gags (most of which are almost funny.). You'll find all sorts of cool shit like Mailbags, VHS Trailer Games, Full Episodes likeRampage (2018),Any Which Way You Can,Bram Stoker’s Dracula andSaw III. Like we said above, these are great for sharing and introducing folks to the show. There's so much content there we can't list it all here. Just go and subscribe already!TJ Hooker…Is back this month! Join Eric and Ben as they discuss Shatner eating in his car and break down an episode where Hooker gets to see his kids!  Listen here!

If you're a fan of the show and a fan of looking sharp, you should check out our merch on our new and improved merch store on Dashery! We have some new, super fun designs by Felipe Sobreiro such as the Total Recall Live show logo, a pair of vaguely gross ones like “Hot Out the Hole” and “The Coin Slot” and the Barbarian Scaredycats design! We also have "The DILF Den", and a "Crispy Critters" design from friend of the show, Nathan Hamill!  There’s a ton of other great designs like The VHS Trailer Game Logo, Demon-o's Pizza, Egg Lawyer, The Order of the Boop, The Kornkast design and many more, with more to come! That's going to do it for this month's Dispatch! Everyone brush up on your leg sweeps and sword play for “White Guy Karate” Month!  

Take it easy,Andrew, Chris, Eric, and SteveWe Hate Movies