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Once In A Lifetime #33 "A Lifeguard's Obsession" (2023) (Patreon)

Published:
2026-08-27 08:00:07
Imported:
2026-08
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On this dog days of summer, hot & sweaty, August edition of our Lifetime Movie recap show, we're talking about a hilarious thriller with an actual body count, A Lifeguard's Obsession!

In this really hilarious Lifetime thriller, we're treated to an embarrassment of riches here with bad blue screen in the prologue, a dude lifeguard who's also a social media influencer, a beachside tiki bar with a proprietor who somehow has a cool-looking skullet and gets laid constantly, some cell phone picture exchange shenanigans, a sick love triangle that crashes out in an abandoned shack, outrageous public pool sex, and some of the funniest, worst-looking, seashell paintings you'll ever see in your life! PLUS: A quick reminder that the TV spin-off, Baywatch Nights existed!

A Lifeguard's Obsession stars Amanda Jones, Christian Howard, Noah Fearnley, Naomi Baker, and Steven James Olson as AJ; directed by Lane Shafter Bishop.

We hope you are enjoying Once In A Lifetime, our bi-monthly (every-other month) WHM podcast where we watch some outrageous Lifetime (and Lifetime-adjacent) movies and attempts to sift through the madness within!Thanks so much for supporting We Hate Movies on Patreon! We know you have a lot of podcast-related listening options and we're grateful you chose to spend some time with us. Please be sure to spread the word! Your support is what keeps this train moving!Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

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Comments

Matt

I may have had way too many tall glasses of water when I watched it, and I need confirmation that it's as batshit as I thought it was.

Eren Keskin

These paintings are somehow shittier than the scorpion paintings in The Wrong Roommate.

RJ Cunningham

The Chris Cabin biopic would begin with him on Nauset Beach in 1996, staring out at the Atlantic. The mention of 1990s Cape Cod sent me back to a time of little shit boy and fat kid summers. Comic books, pogs, a strange amount of stores that sold mainly just pranks, ding dong ditch’ing. For some reason all the cool kids flying kites at the beach for a time. Those Team Force Laser Tag guns had come out and was the game of kings. Only the greatest movies can elicit such memories

Rose Esposito

I'm in the same boat (lol). After the opening scene I realized I had no idea who those two characters were, so when 'Blake' reappeared shortly thereafter I was like "????" and proceeded to be confused for ~45 minutes. EDIT: Chris: "The first scene is hallucinatory." OK, good, not just me then. EDIT II: Wait, the guy in the opening scene WASN'T Ryan/Blake?? oh never mind I don't care

johnny stocker

I just watched the Action Park doc on HBO a month or so ago and got quite a chuckle to hear Steve got pulled out of the drink there.

Tyler The Destroyer

Huge shout out to the dude in the background who should not have been in the shot right when Maggie holds up the sharp stone in front of Ryan
And tells him to step back You can clearly see a crew member or just some dude who shouldn’t be there walking behind her and then he vanishes 
It’s hilarious

Matt

Yeah after listening I've come to the conclusion that I was not as out of it as I thought and this thing really just doesn't make a god damn lick of sense

Kemper

I'm so glad that I'm not the only one who saw that! I had to rewind it to be sure, but you can definately see someone walk behind her at that point. And I'm pretty sure someone is swimming in the ocean behind her as well.

Kemper

This movie and episode of OiaL had me cackling. I also noticed AJ's enormous hog while watching so was pleased that it got called out almost immediately.

Tyler The Destroyer

There is 100% some dude surfing in the background which you could actually add that to the ambience of the scene But the dude just strutting across the beach 15 feet behind them and then vanishing in one second just had me laughing like crazy

Phillip

Really wanting to watch this before listening to the episode but been trying for three days to borrow it from the library with the Hoopla app and every day getting hit with the collective daily borrow limit has been reached. Might have to listen to the episode without watching the movie, disappointing because this sounds like a wild one to watch.

Brandon Taper

I read this before watching the movie and thought AJ meant Andrew Jupin! Was really confused but happy for him!

Brandon Taper

Your library's limit probably resets at midnight. Perhaps try borrowing it then?

Kemper

🤣

Jay

Man, you guys doing a Baywatch Nights recap would be grand. An amazing Hasselhoff theme song in the 1st season - "After the Sun Goooooes Down!" So much bizarre material and history to discuss even if it was only 2 seasons. I'd paid for it. Oh wait.

Busiris

Laughing so much about the ketamine element of the movie. I don't know if anyone remembers, but "Deadly Mile High Club" had the villain using chloroform she got from her pilot's first aid kit (and that became an inside joke in my home ever since). I don't think the folks at Lifetime know what items do and do not belong in a first aid kit!!

Odin Blaine

I’m so glad I watched this before listening. Howling with laughter at Andrew’s “she’s making like…the worst fucking art you’ve ever seen” because it SUCKS SO MUCH WHAT ARE WE DOING🤣