Dispatch One Hundred and Eleven, September 25th, 2026

Greetings WHM Family! 

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! The 2026 Halloween Spooktacular is a little over a week away! Can you stand the anticipation? We can’t! We’ve got all this amazing shit planned for it and we can’t wait to get spookin’ with you all! Speaking of spookin’...did that header image make you throw up? Sorry in advance, but it’s definitely gonna get weird when we do our Scaredy Cats episode on Longlegs this month!  

In the meantime, Season 17 is already firing on all cylinders with all that Agent Nemesis talk, Prince Xizor’s sex droid, and a surprising glut of four forty-something men doing Renate Reinsve impressions! We are so back, gang.  

Banner Credit: We Hate Movies Logo by Felipe Sobreiro

Image Credit: Longlegs Scaredy Logo by Felipe Sobreiro

LAST MONTH ON WHM

Episode 882 –  Midnight Run (1988,WLM, w/ Mayday filmmakers John Francis Daley & Jonathan Goldstein ) 

For a special We Love Movies episode, the gang talked with Mayday writing-directing team John Francis Daley and Jonathan Goldstein about one of the quintessential takes on the buddy-cop formula in Martin Brest’s Midnight Run, as well as their own new spin on the 80s buddy-cop formula with Ryan Reynolds and Kenneth Branagh. What’s the key to a great action-comedy pairing? What makes movies like this so easy to rewatch while maintaining their base appeal? Does Kenneth Branagh do his Russian accent behind the scenes as well? All this and young Joe Pantoliano impressions, folks!

Episode 883 – The Guest (2014, WLM) (Patrons Only)

For September’s We Love Movies, the gang went back to the early days of Adam Wingard and Dan Stevens’s careers, with a John Carpenter-obsessed love letter to the unstoppable killer. How do you just allow this guy into your home like this…unless he has magic powers that make you, possibly? Is there a better Dan Stevens performance out there? Does the soundtrack ever get old? We really hope not, because it’s been getting a real work out.

Episode 884 – Big (1988, Live in Chicago)

Live in Chicago: Recorded this past March at Chicago’s Den Theatre, Andrew, Chris, Steve, and Eric took a trip down memory lane with Tom Hanks as a young man who becomes an unexpected toy magnate in the 1980s. How much of a ladies’ man is this kid before he heads for the Zoltar? Did it get really weird the first time he got drunk with Jon Lovitz? Can we see the Lars von Trier-level sadistic family drama that’s going on back home while he is “cursed” with eating junk food, living in a great apartment in SoHo, and making expert toy salesman money? We hope Elizabeth Perkins’ character got the help she needed after all that…stuff…happened.

Episode 885 – Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982, REDUX)

Season 17 of We Hate Movies hit the ground running as the fellas returned to the factory town of Halloween mask manufacturer, Silver Shamrock with Tom Atkins, a pack of road sodas, and a surprisingly enduring attempt at turning Halloween into an anthology movie franchise. Exactly how horny is Tom Atkins’ actual doctor in this movie? Is it actually that difficult to get Stonehenge shipped out to an eerie factory in northern California? Has any family in horror film history met a more unsettling end than the parents who unknowingly let their son give a mask a test-run? One of the rare movies where all four members think much better of the film some two decades on from the original episode.

Bonus: Here’s Steve last Halloween in his award-losing Dr. Challis costume:

Episode 886 – Resident Evil: Apocalypse  (2004)

In honor of Zach Cregger’s (excellent) Resident Evil, the boys headed back out to Raccoon City with Milla Jovovich and director Alexander Witt. How are these zombie movies still so boring? Exactly how much are we supposed to care about Nemesis and his “secret” identity? Would it be a huge ask to request a little more blood and action in your horror-action blockbuster? It does warm the heart to see Nemesis and Alice find each other all over again like that though.

Episode 887 – Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li  (2004)

Andrew, Eric, Chris, and Steve hit the streets once again to witness the rise of one of Capcom’s greatest creations. Who says an action movie based on a fighting game should have good action direction and editing? Why is M. Bison Irish in this movie? Can you name the member of Black Eyed Peas who plays Vega in this movie? Of the many paths a new Street Fighter movie could take, bargain-bin Batman Begins really wasn’t near the top of our list.

WHAT ARE WE WATCHING?

This is a space for us to talk about some NON-We Hate Movies-related content that we've shoved into our eyeballs in the last month: TV, Movies, Cartoons, and Sports (maybe?). Just about anything that isn't pornography.

Andrew: 

Films from 2026 Catch-Up Edition:

Soulm8te (2026): I wasn’t crazy about that first M3GAN movie, and never bothered with the second, but you tell me this is a movie where it’s the same M3GAN tech, but for a sex robot? I’m in. And yeah, this doesn’t disappoint. I’m not saying Film of the Year by any stretch, but this is a horror movie that has a... moment, where I don’t have to tell you what happens in that moment, but when it happens, you’ll know that it’s the moment I’m talking about— and then you’ll think about that moment every day for at least two weeks straight.

Onslaught (2026): Apologies to the haters and losers, but I had a freakin’ ball with this and cannot wait to see it again. Only wish I got to see it twice in theaters, but it tanked so bad, most shows were wiped off the board after week 1. Now, is it The Guest? Of course not! But we all know it’s a cinematic impossibility to make that film again, or recreate the magic of The Guest again. But this also rocks in its own way. Listen to the score if you’re walking somewhere at night, it’s a fun time. 

The Runner (2026): Not to be confused with the Alan Ritchson film, Runner, which I’ve seen some okay notices for, no, this is the latest Gal Godot embarrassment. Good god. It’s her screaming into a bluetooth headset for 80 minutes while she runs around with some vague operator (the wasted voice of Damian Lewis — not that he’s wasted on booze or whatever, but wasted in the sense that he’s a great actor and they just put the guy on the friggin’ phone the whole time) in her ear giving her instructions. She’s gotta kill her own prosecutorial witness or else the baddies are gonna kill her son… and she’s gotta run across London to go kill the guy. Come for the D.O.A. performance from Gal, stay for the dipshit twist ending nobody was impressed by! 

Marty, Life is Short (2026): Usually these documentaries about an actor/comic/musician aren’t great, mostly just a Greatest Hits clip delivery system. However, director Lawrence Kasdan crafts an actual profile and history of Martin Short, the man, and not just Martin Short, the joke machine. You really get an inside look at the guy’s life, how he came up, how he’s lived, and how important his family and friends are to him. Yes, there are also several clips from his film and television work, but this is a doc that puts the person first and work second. It’s not always the case with these kinds of films and it’s why Kasdan’s profile of his good friend really stands a cut above. Come for the sweet, emotional, home movie clips featuring some of the funniest minds of the last 50 years, stick around for the on-vacation home movie of Tom Hanks and Short acting out the Butch and Sundance cliff jumping scene, but as Forrest Gump and Ed Grimley respectively, while Steven Spielberg is holding the camcorder.

Resident Evil (2026): Loved it. Laughed my ass off. Had a ball getting grossed out. Now my second-fave Cregger film, but honestly I can see this becoming top dog. Austin Abrams carries what is essentially like 80% a one-hander and makes it look easy. I truly don’t care that it doesn’t follow a storyline from any of the games, it’s its own thing while also 100% being a film that knows it has come from the realm of video games. Easily the best movie in the franchise — and I should know, because since recording our episode on Resident Evil: Apocalypse, I have now gone and watched the entire run of RE films. Check out my Letterboxd list where, if you’re a huge fan of this franchise, you’ll likely get very mad at my ranking.

Chris: 

Idiots (2026): Macon Blair’s largely enjoyable third feature, a return to the filth-ridden and demented criminal world of his superb debut, I Don’t Feel at Home in This World Anymore and far more inventive, unpredictable, and gripping than his immensely compromised if mildly fascinating Toxic Avenger remake. Rather than attempting to chase the clean, operatic visions of Michael Mann, Blair seems more in tune with Monte Hellman or the surprisingly unexplored worlds of pulp crime writer Carl Hiaasen, locked as much into the grand ambition of criminals as he is their untamed idiosyncrasies and inescapable ineptitude. Dave Franco has rarely been so funny, Mason Thomas gives off full-on evil vibes, and if more of the film had the emotional clarity and oomph as Blair’s script gives O’Shea Jackson Jr.’s Davis, my rating would be far higher. For now, however, it’s a highly entertaining, unrelenting and fittingly disgusting crime caper, one that might have carried a cult if it had been released in 1997. 

Remake (2025): Up there with The Godfather: Part II and Batman Returns in the pantheon of all-time great sequels to indisputable masterpieces. In this case, the brilliant documentary filmmaker, Ross McElwee utilizes elements of past works that included time with his late son, Adrian, while also exploring the possibility of turning his beloved masterwork, Sherman’s March into a TV show. Those familiar with McElwee will know that he is unrelenting when it comes to investigating himself, and his own intimate dissection of his abilities as a parent is heartbreaking, as much for him as for Adrian, who died from a fentanyl overdose. McElwee is a uniquely sensitive storyteller and is the rare artist that has the ability to render self-examination into truly riveting images and stories without lapsing into sentimentalism. In this case, its a near-impossible feat that he pulls off with startling grace and insight.

Practical Magic 2 (2026): What a piece of crap! Essentially all the things that are to be liked about the original, which has plenty of issues to begin with, are undone by this indecisive, directionless legacy sequel. Men suddenly matter a hell of a lot more than they did in the OG motion picture, and for not much reason beyond everyone decided that Aunt Half-Witch Sally (Sandra Bullock) needs to get a little knock in her boots. What’s worse, Kylie (Joey King), the less self-possessed daughter of Sally, wants to get married immediately and doesn’t know about the love curse and then there’s the second family tied into their family and oh my god, where’s the shotgun and the ammunition right now? None of it adds up to much about sisterly love or learning to live without the ones you love when it's their time to move onto another phase of living. A fat load of nothing starring some very talented performers doing very little with a script that is several rungs beneath them.

Eric: This ended up being a very light month for me but I'm also saving a lot of New York Film Festival stuff for our OSL coverage.

A Fistful of Dollars (1964): After spending August going through random Spaghetti Westerns I had to go back to this one. Clint Eastwood is undeniably a movie star here and adds such a pop that most other garlic bread banditos don't possess. 

The Count of Monte Cristo (2002): Does anyone else remember how we used to get glossy historical quasi-blockbusters? The on-location filming in Malta and Ireland in this is really beautiful and we'll probably never see anything like it again. There's some dialogue that reeks of the early aughts but it's fun. And hey, is that Luis Guzman in a prominent role? Pretty cool! Henry Cavill is the disputed son. Feel old yet?

Killer Meteors (1976): Baby Jackie Chan plays a villain in this. That's all that's noteworthy. 

Tony (2026): Playing ketchup, not catch-up, because it's a cooking movie. I liked a lot about this but it left me wanting a little more. Like eating at a really good restaurant then coming home and ordering delivery because you're still hungry.

Resident Evil (2026): Really had a blast with this. 

Steve: 

Onslaught (2026): The Wingard I know and love is back, baby! And that is cause for celebration. This movie is a stone cold blast and it’s a shame that it did poorly because I want more of it! A fantastic score and soundtrack keeping the beat of a breathless, cool, weird wild night is all I need. The cast is top to bottom great, Adria Arjona is a fantastic anchor and an absolute star, Drew Starkey nearly steals the whole movie as a black bag clean-up dude that took molly at the wrong time, and of course Dan Stevens and Rebecca Hall are pitch perfect B-Movie magic. A must rent when it comes to streaming, gang. 

Out of the Blue (1980): I caught the restoration at the Roxy Cinema downtown and it knocked me the fuck out. Apparently (according to info from Chloë Sevigny’s introduction) Dennis Hopper didn’t remember a thing about directing this movie, but if that’s the case maybe more directors should make movies on wild benders. Hopper delivers a perfectly shambly, earnest, deeply uncomfortable coming of age story about a lost teenage girl grieving Elvis (nursing some pretty deep wounds) and trying to live punk rock. Linda Manz is so raw and powerful and breaks your damn heart. 

Hope (2026): I’ll be in the minority on this one. No sir, I didn’t like it! Na Hong-jin’s film starts with plenty of promise and has some really stunning monster set pieces, great, biting and often blue humor, and a few genuinely winning provincial characters. Sounds great right? Well, sure…but each of those excellent set pieces is stretched to beyond the breaking point and becomes so repetitive, whatever you enjoyed in minute one is grating on you by minute eight or so. The pace of this was so, so bloated and punishing I couldn’t get past it. Add to that and one of the more irritating sequel set ups in recent memory, as a film experience I found myself angrier at this than I had been in any movie in a little while. Which is a shame because there’s a lot to like!

Showdown (1993): A Stupid City recommendation from the mayor himself, Steve Sajdak! This one’s dumb as dirt and the only copy on Amazon has some audio issues (you’ll have to crank it, I’m afraid)...but! It’s so delightfully dumb. Ken Scott stars as the world’s oldest high school senior that moves to a school that is ruled with an iron fist by the Karate Bullies from an evil dojo (sound familiar?), wouldn’t you know it…the only way he can win the girl, and his self-respect, is to go under the wing of a hilariously disgraced police officer turned janitor played by Billy Blanks. Pure 90’s cheese folks. 

PATREON MAILBAG LIGHTNING ROUND

Here's a fun space where folks on Patreon get to ask us Questions directly. This month's entry comes from

Alan from Pittsburgh who asks:

“The Halloween III redux episode got me thinking, what do yinz consider to be the best ending to a horror movie?”

Andrew: The ending to The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974). Not a doubt in my mind.   

Chris: I know Andrew just said it, but I really do always come back to the end of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. The final girl is forever locked in a state of raving, laughing madness, having just barely escaped the fate of being rendered into little more than meat for eating. Meanwhile, Leatherface is in a state of reverie as she’s driven away, dancing in the road with his roaring chainsaw rumbling in his gripped fist, swinging his machine around and indifferent if its blades find his own flesh or the meat of another. Poetic in a deeply deranged and unforced way that never quite leaves you after you see it the first time. If we’re looking for something a bit more recent or out of the familiar, two I have come back to a lot are the conclusions of Parker Finn’s excellent Smile 2 and Kiyoshi Kurosawa’s stunning Cloud, both of which expand rather than close the thematic and emotional pathways of the film that has come before. Most of the compliment goes to Finn here, as it has been known for a long time that Kurosawa is uniquely talented at endings, as is true of Cloud, Chime, and his remake of his own Serpent’s Path as Cure, License to Live, and Sweet Home. 

Eric: The Shining. It's more haunting than scary and it leaves you ponderin'. 

Steve: Basic bitch time: It’s Halloween (1978). Yes, it’s a classic sequel set-up, but it’s clearly not what Carpenter was going for. He wanted the eerie ghost story chill that this thing you thought you could contain, that you’ve finally conquered is beyond any of that. He’s gone, still out there, and could be under your bed right now. 

“It was the boogeyman” 

“As a matter of fact, it was.”

OCTOBER SCHEDULE

Say what? The schedule in advance?! It's the least we could do! By subscribing to this newsletter, you get a sneak peek at what we're putting out for the Spooctacular:

Free Feed:

October 6th  – The Frighteners (1996) 

October 13th – Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)

October 20th – Child’s Play 2 (1990)

October 27th– Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood with James A. Janisse and Chelsea Rebecca

Patreon Episodes:

October 8th – We Love Movies: Scream (1996)

October 9th –  MELR0210: 90210: “Twenty Years Ago Today” (s4, e8) Melrose Place: “To Live and Die in Malibu” (s3, e24)

October 15th – Once in a Lifetime: Invitation to Hell (1984)

October 22nd  – Animation Damnation: The Scooby Doo Show (1978):  “To Switch a Witch” (s3, e4)

October 23rd  – The Star Wars Gleep Glossary: Bodo Baas

October 27th at 8pm EST – WHM After Dark: Come with your questions at the ready and spend an hour hanging out with the gang!

October 28th – Scaredy Cats V: Longlegs (2024)

October 29th – The Nexus: TOSTAS: “The Counter Clock Incident” (s2 e6) TNG: “New Ground”(s5, e10) 

PATREON RSS BUG

If you’re having trouble with the RSS feed updating or episodes not appearing in your app, Patreon has acknowledged this bug and they have a fix: "Try unsubscribing and re-subscribing via your app by re-entering the unique RSS feed you were given and is on our Overview section of the Creator page. Or try using a different podcast app or RSS feed reader." Please consult this page and contact Patreon Support if the problem persists. We apologize for any inconvenience you’ve experienced on Patreon and truly appreciate your continued support!

UPCOMING NEWS AND PROMOTION

In case you missed it we opened our Patreon Shop we released the previously unavailable Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter virtual live show for purchase on our Patreon shop! This was such a fun show and it'll be awesome to revisit or experience for the first time as you get to talk us gab about (one of) the best entries in the Friday the 13th canon! You get a new introduction recorded by us, the show from that night, and an audio file of the whole thing so you can enjoy the show again on the go!

You’re keeping up with our Youtube channel, right? On-Screen Live will be back with a New York Film Festival Special on Monday, October 5th at Noon EST, subscribe now so you don’t miss when it returns! Also, Eric’s been killing it uploading full episodes like The Family Plan 2, Terror Train, Silent Night Deadly Night 5: The Toymaker, and breakouts of all the VHS Trailer Games!

Also, speaking of Video Content, are you aware We Hate Movies is on TikTok? We are @whmpodcast! We’ve got some kick-ass short form videos releasing there, on the aforementioned Youtube page, and of course on Instagram! These are short, super fun ways to relive your favorite bit and share on these platforms to get new folks into the show too! All credit for these amazing videos goes to @gnarcissist on TikTok! 

That’s not all that’s on offer for short form video content! Nick Q has been doing some stellar original animations of classic WHM bits that we’re calling WHM Toons. There’s ones on Man of Steel and Star Trek (2009), live now and are MUST see on our Instagram, TikTok and YouTube pages. 

Hooked on T.J. Hooker has another classic ep in the books and this time Stacy is almost murdered! Like those True Crime Podcasts you folks like. Listen here! 

If you're a fan of the show and a fan of looking sharp, you should check out our merch on our new and improved merch store on Dashery! We have some new, super fun designs by Felipe Sobreiro such as the exclusive design for our residency at this summer’s ST:LV, our Total Recall Live show logo, a pair of vaguely gross ones like “Hot Out the Hole” and “The Coin Slot” and the Barbarian Scaredy Cats design! We also have "The DILF Den", and a "Crispy Critters" design from friend of the show, Nathan Hamill!  There’s a ton of other great designs like The VHS Trailer Game Logo, Demon-o's Pizza, Egg Lawyer, The Order of the Boop, The Kornkast design and many more, with more to come! That's going to do it for this month's Dispatch. See you next month for We Love Movies Month!

Take it easy,Andrew, Chris, Eric, and SteveWe Hate Movies