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As the years go on, I find myself less charmed by noises. When I was younger, sure, noises were an interesting feature of the landscape. "What was that noise?" "Was that noise meant for me?" "Maybe the person who made that noise will become my wife!" But no more. I have a pretty good bead on what's happening with me each day, and rarely does a noise indicate that part of the plan is changing for the better. I may need to move to a far hill, and live there. We'll see, though. Maybe everybody will finally keep it down, once they learn how unpleasant it is for others when they generate sharp reports, talk, or have their own bluetooth speaker playing in the bathroom at the gym. Please help, and do your part, and maybe someday soon we will win the war against noises.

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Comments

jordan b.

poor Téodor's butthole. ( also I appreciate how Dr Andretti didn't change into clothes but *did* put the reflector thing on. )

Achewood

Good morning! I am on a Family Vacation and won’t be as active in the posts this week as usual, so I assign all of you to act like me. (Quoting my old strips to myself is the usual tactic. Enjoy.)

Achewood

Doc Andretti is standing on it (ceremony)

Song Club with John Krane

It's always a big deal when a doctor re-opens his clinic for you after closing it for the night-time.

Alex Schlesinger

Doc Andrettis commitment to his work is commendable. Probably why he only has a Miata even though doctors are supposed to have good cars.

Jay Y

Onstad is not a dude of noises. Incidentally, I keep noticing that when I try going through the searchable archives for some oddball quote, it won't turn up. Any way to fix that? I feel like if it's grunt work, maybe the chos hereabouts can take it up on a volunteer basis for the benefit of the library.

Bruce Wright

The humiliation just never ENDS for Téodor.

Pubdoggy

A day spent doing Victorian Style photography and now I snorted into a craft beer due to poo-mor (mour). Sometimes I just *get* myself.

s b

feels like one of the main new sounds is the faint angelic chorus indicating a Kia is backing up

Josh Egbert

I thought that said piranha sound bath & I was worried Ray had invested in a Fear Factor inspired hippie resort

Linus Lee

hey everybody we're outlandish bowel expression and we just need a suggestion of type of transportation to get started

Bungus Bronbo

biannual inquiry as to whether or not vlad is dead

Zen Window

I'm OK having Beef moments. I'm OK having Ray moments. I'm even OK having Philippe moments. I will never be OK recognizing T's qualities in myself. I am fully content being a caveman in the kitchen if it means never having to be like...any of that.

Achewood

Mister Gary’s electric car was adapted to emanate Tibetan sound bowl tones

Achewood

I have the db from Ryan north but the tech on his end got hosed a long time ago. It works with single keywords, but not strings, as you noticed. Getting that reassembled is a 26 priority.

rickward

By the time Spring officially rolls around ol’ T is gonna have at least the most studied and diagnosed junk and stewpot in the state. I can see Ray laying out serious dough for surgery and serious sass for recommended lifestyle changes, including serious upgrades to T’s situational awareness protocols.

Achewood

I forgot he had a Miata! Where’s the reference? Blog?

Ted

I also find THIS heartwarming.

Bungus Bronbo

1. goddamn this is evocative 2. Particularly fond of Dr Andretti still not wearing a shirt in the last panel 3. I kinda hope this goes the Dinosaur Comics route of using the exact same panels where every week ends with Teodor's gettin' colonoscopied

Achewood

The man is purely objective and rational. He’s a doctor, after all.

Achewood

We can start a tier for (3)

Dr. Problems

Very good sweat drop continuity on Dr. Andretti there

Marc Harkness

I'm wondering how many of the Teodor strips could be retconned to finish with that panel. Probably all of them.

Achewood

I’m hearing this to the Monkees theme

E Corcoran

"All men know not to audiocast, yet few answer the challenge." This is one of Achewood's greatest lessons, and one that I have never forgotten.

Daniel Burt

It's heartening to know that Ray is Teodor's emergency contact for proctal imbalance and is not only allowed but, presumably, insisted on observing.

Achewood

Bless your mindfulness, may the children learn

Achewood

I bet someone here could pretty easily create the app for that experience

rickward

man things ain’t never the same once you’ve seen *or heard* a dude’s stew

Achewood

Thank you! That was when I knew I had a strip

Derek Adams

Ray comments on it during Beef and Molly's wedding

Achewood

“Emeril and Spongebath in the soundbath” could go to 20 pages

Achewood

No matter how they’re doing personally, it’s a Dudes’ Commitment

Oppido

Orezctum, now available in the Apple Store

Distant Egg Song

Thank god Teodor never learned what a Commodore was. Him trying the home version on himself could have killed him.

jordan b.

why stop at Téodor? "This rectum utterly confounds me." "We have an examination machine for it." "Philippe is standing in it."

Oppido

Man, and during a Stephanie show, too? You can't get those tickets open-market.

Daniel Burt

Agreed. Holes before bros.

Amelia Hall

Sounds like seven pines needs to upgrade their washroom to include an otohime sound princess. As per usual, Japan has that politeness action down decades ahead of the rest of us. I can't say I've won the war on noises, but I have a giant set of chimes (couple feet tall) in my back yard, and those help drown out abrasive noises nicely.

Jay Y

That's what I've been using, but say, if I type in just noises, I get the deer getting shot and Todd doing cocaine on Phillipe's birthday, but not the "ain't a dude of noises" strip, hence my wondering if the transcription just stopped at some point. Anyway, good to hear it's a 26 priority. Code is a nightmare.

b.zap

Wash a realm of ass Teodor

Tom

BAH HA HA HA oh Teodor never change

Sedric and Charlie

Téodor gets closer and closer all the time to encountering the Mexican Magical Realism endoscope

Tucker

Beef would have clocked it as pimp skitters immediately

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

I like birds but a lot of people noise sucks. IBS-D sucks. Dropping copious whooshing ass at a nonsanctioned time sucks. I have been awake since 3:30 this morning because of the god damned wind which is noisy as hell. It's a nature sound so you'd think it wouldn't be a big deal but the windows and siding are rattling and THAT noise is unnerving. Also, it is Fuck You Friday the 13th which is even more of a fuck you IMHO. I'm a little superstitious.

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

They probably have large gaps around the doors too and just enough space to echo loudest.

Phineas X. Jones

I have to lay the blame here on whomever designed this venue. You're always going to get some Téodors and you have to prepare. But I hope our guy is getting the help he needs.

Nicholas Williams

Doc Andretti is a strange, strange man. I like it. I think it's cool. I know dudes like that, and they are usually pretty solid.

Ian Stewart

Of course the bathrooms at Seven Pines are the architectural equivalent of a lossless audio codec. Having that sort of ad-hoc diagnostic available makes it straightforward to start the all-important digestion conversation with your healing team.

GruntyGinMan

T is one of those guys who never washes his butthole but asserts he is hygienic(he is not)

GruntyGinMan

If T had been in the navy he would have never left the stall because all his shipmates would have gathered around loudly commenting and declaring such as FIRE IN THE HOLE

Gregory Sheets

So is the machine cost-effective enough for solo flights now? And are the Japanese still involved?

severecorvid

this is pretty much like a perfect bs catastrophization scenario from the mind of someone who suffers from social AND health anxiety. I cant go to the sound bath because what if I shit myself so badly that a doctor on-site will whisk me away so they can discover my horrible illnesses

Mae

man teodor can just never hang

Oppido

A four-month arc... if you're brave enough to climb that peak, Onstad.

Shawn Warren

I would not be surprised to learn that Ray had a brief but intense Austin Powers phase in the back half of '97

Josh Egbert

It was 100% his Halloween costume that year. He asked the mayor's wife if he made her horny & there was an awkward few days until Ray made a modest but noted donation to the re-elect.

Matthew Miller

I am picturing an alternate universe Emeril & Spongebath, gender swapped, like Fiona & Cake. But also lifestyle swapped into hardcore wellness and relaxation techniques. High intensity breakfast yoga in burlap Lulu Lemon at 2 atmospheres of pressure.

Oppido

It's owned by the same people as p o u l t r y ;

The Good Poster

If this happens a third time, "Teodor has to get his asshole medically examined" becomes a running gag. I hope for this.

Ben Wilinofsky

This was an absolutely terrifying comic to wake up to on a day when I had an acupuncture sound bath scheduled. My bowel paranoia has only rarely been higher

A. Hamster

It’s one of those things you do all the way, or not at all. Imagine a man in a cowboy hat yelling WOOOO-EEE upon releasing a sturdy stream of crisp white noise that pressure washes the caked-on feces from the back rim of the toilet.

Gozan

"water balloon lo mein" certainly paints a soundscape. A sploshy, squeaky soundscape.

mutecypher

"Maybe the person who made that noise will become my wife!" Ah. yes, the confusion of youth.

Douglas Wykstra

This is entirely on the venue. Teodor innocent, in this one case and no other.

lake

Happy to see the Doc!

C C

WRRRR =UNGH= =URGH=

A. C.

all time classic

Datura

we can keep running this panel back. it's still fresh gives some they killed kenny type vibes

Achewood

I think it can be a shirt. Girthy Prostate Club.

Michael Rabalais

Cried laughing at this. Water balloon lo mein and bowel expression killed me

Achewood

Welcome back, honky tonk hero!