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Poll

POLL: Want An Historic Achewood Varsity Tee?

  • I am interested in this shirt. 55
  • It's not the one for me, thanks. 15
  • 2026-04-08
  • 70 votes
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Content

In-Universe Tier: I've been toying with a mimic of that classic "American Varsity Tee" style. Yea/nay? Suggestions for the overall elements? Thinking a faded-looking, garment-dyed cotton, as seen here. Like all my favorite tees, I want it to look like a thrift store gem from a parallel universe. What's 1945 all about, you ask? As indicated here, the Achewood Underground project began in 1945, "spearheaded by billionaire (feline) developer J. Vincent J. Lemoni." Elsewhere we have proof that the mascot of his namesake high school is "The Fightin' Lemonis," but the original mascot was actually "The Fightin' J. Vincent J. Lemonis," until it was noted how much space that took up on jerseys. (And nobody at the garment decoration shop knew how to apostrophize the plural of Lemoni, as in the instance of "a lot of Lemonis." Do you? Lemonis? Lemoni's? Lemonis'?)

Files

Comments

Stymie

The plural should be Js. Vincent Js. Lemoni.

Achewood

In the Third Person, Resplendent case

Zach M

i'd wear that shirt. maybe just 'the fightin' lemonis' for reasons described above

Achewood

An excellent suggestion which did not once cross my mind. Thank you!

Zach M

i'm here to help

Mark Thom

Who in their right mind would be disinterested in this shirt

Achewood

Only a person with zero emotions. They are out there; I have heard them on economics podcasts where you can smell the manila folders

mdb

I'm an easy mark, my eyes read the phrase "garment dyed" and rolled back into my head as i started speaking in tongues. Personally i think it deserves the full Fightin' J. Vincent J. Lemonis. Reminds me of when my high school got a C&D from Notre Dame after they'd been calling themselves the Fightin' Irish and using a recolored version of the leprechaun for I don't even know how many years prior.

Achewood

I agree, it's important to have both J's. It's what made the old coot so distinctive. That, and he was a cat with billions of dollars. Someday we shall explore his origin story.

Jeff Norman

With surnames, you just add an s to make them plural. Contrary to popular belief, "The Smith's"...

Jeff Norman

I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Spreadsheets malfunctioning off the shoulder of Orion. I watched PivotTables analyze data in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be filed alphabetically, like “tears in rain” under T. Oops, time for coffee break.

Achewood

I am typically a snot about possessive apostrophes but in my advancing zen some of the old rules have gone slack

Achewood

Replicants weren't supposed to discover the flight simulator easter egg in Microsoft Excel ‘97. But it’s what allowed us to overtake them.

Roger

I've always tried to resolve whether it's pronounced "Lemony" (of or pertaining to lemons) or "Le Money". Headcanon resolution is that the family name is pronounced like the former but pop culture references pronounce it like the latter.

Achewood

It's "luh-MOW'-nē." At least inasmuch as I have any influence over this. There are still people who staunchly say, "fuh-LEAP-pay" instead of "fuh-LEAP"

2scrogz

My grammarian take: The plural of Lemoni is Lemonis. Lemoni's is a singular possessive ("Of or belonging to J. Vincent J. Lemoni") and Lemonis' is a plural possessive ("Of or belonging to the Lemoni family/estate collectively.")

Achewood

I’m in this camp as well. Always have been. I’ve just been looking at that word too long, and it’s a weird word, and if unfamiliar people who see the shirt don’t get it, well, that is the essence of the Achewood experience, isn’t it

2scrogz

Wait the plural of Smith is Smith's?! Is that really how it works? I was confidently incorrect in another comment. I guess my whole life is a lie, and I need to go re-evaluate my decisions that have lead to this point. DAMMIT. Is there a feeling worse than being incorrect about grammar in a comment on THE INTERNET?!

2scrogz

You're either on the bus, or you're off the bus. (Or you're Chris Onstad, owner and operator of said metaphorical bus.)

Jeff Norman

Well, I mean, you could have started a war for no reason.

Jeff Norman

Never mind: that guy doesn't feel bad at all.

Gregory Sheets

Wait, it’s not “fee-REEP?” That’s my worldview shattered.

Achewood

Some particularly obstinate readers just call him Dan