0015 - Beautiful Dreams (Patreon)

When cats consider cosmetic augmentation, they do not worry themselves with the bits and tips that matter so dearly to you and me. Chief among their notions of vanity are ears with a gently-rounded crest; too pointy, and one is said to be, "putting on the goblin." (Cats have goblins too.) For all his life this mean-spirited accusation has been hurled at poor Roast Beef. Conversely, cats such as Ray, who have ears so rounded their silhouettes are regularly confused for stacks of lemons, are actually thought of as fine. But perhaps a lifetime of inadvertently studying his close friend's various aging crevasses and junctures might have given Beef rarefied insight as to his unique and generally imperceptible flaws. Having seen the same friend vomit gumbo into a salad bowl while also emitting unbroken laughter — a seeming otolaryngic impossibility — can also have the effect of diminishing their beauty.