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start of da week encouragement 8/18 + ramblings (Patreon)

Published:
2025-08-18 17:25:59
Imported:
2026-06
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hellooo pengoon 💙it's another week yaayy!! beeg things coming...

ending up rambling and mumbling a lot again haha i hope that's okay...!! pls enjoy this little message for you 🥺

i'm excited for this week, wrapping up my retrothon series and gonna finally do a karaoke again (i'm really bad tho lol don't expect anything good...it's all just for fun!), a little celebratory moment for how far we've come with so many things 💙

this is the last week before i go on my family vacation next week...i'm really nervous about it tbh but also excited...!! mostly excited to come back LOL cuz im planning so much epic exciting things for the return :D whole new era!! i'm gonna be prepping even while on vacation so i'll still be working hard hehe...while it's sad to go away for a while, i hope u can wish me good luck and look forward to all the future fun stuff i have planned! there will still be stuff coming out while i'm gone so you shouldn't be too starved (i still have to record a bunch of stuff for that actually, ahhh you can do it zenya one thing at a time...i miss when i had a huge backlog of videos haha everything is so rushed now ;;)

busy busy imouto...be strong for me okay~ will be thinking about u always!! 😘

Comments

Claymore 155

It is kind of you to want to keep us entertained while you're away. Enjoy your vacation and time with your family. Make good memories. Your feelings are always welcome to share. It's healthy to express your thoughts, and it's something other "big" people tend to stumble in and have all come out at once. You're doing great. Looking forward to the week ahead.

mikeabc

i personally think you are doing great :3 and i have a feeling most other vtubers are winging it as well c: thanks for the words of encouragement :D! WE got this :3

AffeMitKrebs

Hope your vacation next week is great. I believe in you and can’t wait for this weeks activities.

JustBnake

💙💙I’m glad you feel comfortable talking to us about this commander, it makes me happy being able to understand how you think and feel about these things! I think it’s really great that you’re trying to improve yourself, one step at a time!! I’m here supporting you all the way zenya! Ganbare!! I believe in you!! I’ll be eagerly waiting your return after the vacation, I’m very excited to see what you have in store!! Love youuuu you’re amazing!! 💙💙

Skyunai

I loved our weekend together and the pciture is super good, you looked really cute! Dont feel bad about being candid or expressing your feelings openly, I love listening to how you feel 💙💙💙 I think its alright to mess up, if people think it's bad then that's their problem, its going to happen, unfortunately its an inevitability, it will happen regardless, all you can really do is work forward and try to keep your head on straight! It can be stressful under that sort of pressure yeah... but, I wouldnt worry about being "professional" or anything, sure may not be great for metrics, but its better for your mentality and sanity, there's lots of people who are secessful who aren't exactly being professional What a lot of the indie tubers do is chase after the professional standard that the "pro corpos" set, which can be "good" but is a lot more stressful and a lot of work,especially without having a management team backing you, but you already have so much on your plate, please dont push yourself. Besides, what brought me to you was your candidates and more "casual" feel, you dont feel overtly professional and that's a good thing! So dont worry about being more professional either, you dont need to follow in other's footsteps, make your own path like you have been These other idiots on the internet literally do not matter, ignore them, as far as I'm concerned they are controlling and genuinely pardon my French, fucking dumb. They want to force you to do what they want, you dont need to listen. Do what you want. Have fun. These idiots can find someone else, in their pool of hundreds of vtubers they watch. I personally dont want to see you burn out over chasing professionalism with everything that you already do in the background, you're amazing, they dont see that, its not your fault, its theirs. Im not speaking fron a regulars POV btw, but from an objective perspective having seen these things happen in the past If you want my subjective perspective They can go rot in a hole, you're perfect the way you are, and I love you a shit ton, more than you know, and I dont wanna see my baby princess imotou commander wife being told what to do by incels on the internet. That's subjective there, but anyway lol Love you sweetheart, I hope you have a good rest of your day, take care, and see you for stream later! 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

Goatfort

Don't worry baby. everyone is a mess really. like you say you only usually see the perfect presentations. but trust, they are just as nervous to mess up. let's all keep trying our bests.💙💙💙💙

Snackchampion{DK}

Thank you for the encouragement Zenya 💙💙 And it's okay to be honest with yourself and your emotions 💙💙 I love you lots Zenya Wishing you a great week 💙💙

Wildcucumber

Enjoy your vacation Zenya!! You've been nose to the grind stone for a while now and deserve the break!! I find that we are often our biggest critics. Self confidence is something many people struggle, more than we probably think, but it isn't something people talk about. I sometimes feel like I have to "Put on the mask" to go to work and be all smiley, happy-go-lucky. Finding a balance is what works best for me, and hearing you talk about it makes me feel better about my own insecurities so I do appreciate you sharing. I am a people pleaser. I want to make everyone happy and not hate me no matter what expense to myself or my own sanity but its just not possible and that can be REALLY hard pill for me to swallow. It is something I have to take one day at a time and somedays are better than others but I just try to remind myself that is just part of the human experience. You're doing your best and that is all anyone could ever ask of you take pride and comfort in that. I promise to keep doing my best if you promise to keep doing your best okay? Love you lots Zen thank you for the encouragement!!

Varric

I think you're perfect as you are. Stay true to yourself, ignore toxic people, and do your best to not stress over being "professional" because I love you just the way you are. 💙

Shade

Thanks for the cute message Zen. No need to appologize, you are who you are. There are for sure normie randos who might not watch but as you grow there's gonna be more and more people, remember you can't make everyone happy, but for the people who are interested in your stuff, more of them will stick around. So try not to let the bad comments get to you too much. Gotta protect your self from brainworm infested comments. Just dont let yourself get so cought up in "the grind" that it hurts you. You're doing great, and I hope you have a wonderful and relaxing and revitalizing vacation next week.

Anta

I'll miss you a lot next week but I'm glad you'll get time to relax and rest💙 Honestly we are all dealing with something at some level you don't have to feel bad about crashing out once in a while, honestly that's better than holding everything inside, being true to yourself is always better Every day thanks to you is a good day but that doesn't mean you have always be perfect, you are our baby is fine to rely on us just like we rely on you❤️💙

vgboss

Thanks for the sweet message! You are who you are and I wouldnt want anything else from you ok? Im cheering for you too. 💙💙💙

wasmuu

I think a lot of people appearing more put together or professional is really just an appearance. There is a lot of scuff that happens and it's either behind the scenes or they roll with it. However, I really appreciate you being open and honest with us. It means a lot. It shows that you trust us and makes me at least feel more comfortable with you and like I can trust you more too. Anyone who doesn't like it can get filtered. Sometimes all it takes is one guy to make you feel bad, and I don't think you should work on it to please those people, which I think you already know. As the pressure ramps up, I think you should be kinder to yourself. I hate to see you struggling with these things because I know stress can lead to other mental health issues as well. But that also means not putting too much pressure on yourself to "fix" it all right away. Just keep chipping away at it and you'll make progress. You should be proud of yourself too for pushing through during the last ASMR stream. It seemed like that was kind of a big deal, and you ended up feeling better by the end of it. As I was saying about other people seeming more professional, sometimes "faking it" is really what it is. You just roll with it, and you're able to have a clearer head to be able to make decisions during those times (like muting the mics, silly :P). There are some things that are unavoidable and will happen to everyone at some point, like tech issues. I've heard buzzing that didn't get taken care of for over a month, dogs constantly barking, streams constantly dying, collabs having audio issues for hours, frequently being much later than you are for worse reasons, etc. from streamers around your size and even ones much bigger than you. I want to reiterate that me saying this is not about anyone other than you and your mental health. Please continue to be open with us, and I would also like to hopefully be able to say some things that might make it a little more bearable for you as you grow. Growth is something you deserve. And don't worry, I will never get frustrated or annoyed with you no matter how long it takes, or even if it's this way forever. You're a sensitive girl and that's one of the things I love about you. Anyone who doesn't like that can, again, get filtered. Fuck the haters. They might help you see things in a different light sometimes but the way they see things is entirely too negative and only serves to criticize and ultimately hurt you. And yeah I think I might know what you were referring to. I might be wrong, but if not, that was me who responded. I think you noticing that two streams a day is especially stressful is great insight and reducing it to one is not a bad idea. Who knows, you might even be able to get more done that way, but don't put too much pressure on yourself. You already have enough of that it seems. Anyway I hope you have a lovely vacation! Use it as a time to let some of this stress out. I'll be thinking about you the whole time. I'm looking forward to everything that's coming, and I know you can do this! I love you baby!

Factotum

Anyone with your kind of rigorous work schedule would get overwhelmed occasionally as well. It's nothing to be ashamed of, and anyone bothered by completely normal human behavior can be safely disregarded as a total nimrod.

Bigsquatch88

Enjoy your vacation! Thanks for the sweet message.

Vic

Thank you for the sweet message 💙 you can only get so emotional about things you're truly passionate about. With how much you've got going on, it's only natural to feel overwhelmed at some point. Thank you for always doing your best, it truly does motivate me to try harder for you 💙 See you later for streams, love you lots 💙💙💙

Halhorn

Hope that your day has been well Zen! Proud of you for working so hard for all of us, keep at it and we'll be here to support you. Seeing a picture of you during the patreon stream was so nice, it was amazing to see your hot body while hearing you hehe. I don't mind you being more casual, feeling like this is a space to be yourself and tell us how you really feel. I like the way you do things, I can tell you're working hard on finding what best works for you and us. Nobody is perfect, hardly anyone is actually ever put together or has a plan for the future. Most people just get by, day by day, even if you never really see that. Having these breakdowns is normal, I just think people are not used to seeing them in public, but that doesn't mean it's bad. If you feel comfortable being able to crashout in front of pengoons for whatever the reason, maybe you feel better having us reassure you in the moment, maybe you just don't want to end stream because of it, etc, then that's okay, you can do that! We can be there for you in the moment, tell you things are going to be okay, because it will be. Even when you feel your emotions very intensely, I'm happy you trust us to stick around with you through it. Love you!

Tomoya

You should keep doing what you want and don't be afraid to let your feelings out. Listening to how open you are about your feelings are part of the reason why I truly enjoy watching your content. If you feel like you need to go back to 1 stream a day I whole heartedly support you. 💙

Ike

Always nice to get a message from you. I love hearing your thoughts, feelings and comments 💙💙💙💙 I'm not very good at putting my thoughts into words or expressing what I'm thinking and feeling, but I'll do my best to give you some encouragement as well: I know my word isn't much, but I genuinely love how open you are with us. It's what makes you so real and genuine, and is the reason I find myself actually watching your streams instead of just afking. I know you feel you have to act a certain way on stream, and it can be frustrating. Your feelings are valid, and I don't see any reason you can't let them out a bit. Maybe I just dont get it because I'm not a content creator, I'm speaking from my heart instead of my mind. And as much as I'd love for everyone to love you, unfortunately the reality is that people won't like us for a multitude of petty and inconsequential reasons. I tend to tune those kinds of people out unless they have genuine criticisms, otherwise they're just not worth our time. Keep on and stay strong, Zen! We'll make it through this week together, and then you have a trip! Well, I hope you have a lot of fun, I'll miss you but excited for you to get back. I love you so much, Zenya, and that isn't just empty words 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

Rainy clouds

Hey zen. I did notice that you would get upset when you did two stream’s in a day. I agree with just one a day too as I would too struggle to keep up with you due to my own personal circumstances. Am definitely going to miss you during the next week x You can do it zen! Don’t forget how to be a streamer now heh.

竹竹

I could listen to you for hours, you have plenty of ppl like me that will support you even when you experience hard times. have a fun and safe trip commander! :)

justAperson

You don’t have to feel bad about being vulnerable . Those that don’t like it, shouldn’t get to know you. And those that don’t support you shouldn’t be able to see you at your greatest. I think one stream a day would be fine, but you should still give yourself a day off. That way you could build a small backlog of ideas to do. Thank you for the good wishes and love you💙💙💙

kawa6

Ganbare Zen, do your best with all that work and prep! First off, I appreciate that you're willing to share your feelings with us. Being subject to the whims of the masses is unfortunately the life of content creation isn't it. Theres definitely a time to kinda settle into a niche and build a core audience around that that isn't as fickle, but it takes time to get there, and if you're trying to grow like you are, you're not going to really build that just quite yet. Oh no no no, you don't realize that like 95% of streamers are just like that. Most of them are just winging it every stream, day by day. In fact, in terms of planning. Hell you put out a schedule every single week. You know how rare that is for a streamer? Hell even if youre talking about some of the most successful streamers like in hololive, so many of them would absolutely fail at any sort of coordination and planning without the help of a manager, and you're pretty much doing that just by yourself. I know canadian health system and all, but could be worth it to book a session with a therapist to help you process through all of those contributing factors to your emotional state. Because honestly it could be any-and all of those things contributing to it. But hopefully, as you said, you can slowly get a better understanding of yourself and your emotional/stress triggers so you could get the help or find ways to mitigate the issues that you need. with that, covering all the content that you want comes secondary to your mental health, so if you find limiting yourself to doing one stream per day helps with your mental, please do so. also please don't downplay it, mental health is important. These things can take a long time to truly understand (like well into adult years old), so its a slow process. So small steps of improvements for you, and we'll help you through the steps that you miss. 💙💙💙 Rooting for you, love you!💙💙💙

joedarwin10

All I can say you did good zenya. Dont think too much despite your popularity is big now. We all are your fans because you are who you are. Cheer up and hope you get a lot of rest in family vacation too.

Sharkington

It was really great to see you get all flustered when trying to chat up yourself on the character ai. And thank you for sharing what's on your mind! I think it's fine to want to be perfect to not lose anyone, but you shouldn't be overly harsh on yourself either if you aren't able to. Anything you need to do to try to help get a better mindset, we got your back! Definitely agree with you on trying to avoid the double streams. You got this.

ThePotatoGuy

hey Zen! ^_^ thank you for your encouragement, always lovely to hear your voice 💙💙💙 im finally back from travelling so cant wait to catch up on all your vids! especially excited for the visual triggers one 💙 honestly im honored to be part of the crew here who get to listen to your feelings, and I'm glad you feel safe here to share 💙 regarding pressure and expectations, if you've been feeling that way often, then damn you've been doing a great job pushing through those emotions to stream! even when scuffs happen here and there, you always keep it moving and fix or adapt to the situation 💙 this actually kind of reminds me of my friend who works in event management, in pretty much every event she runs, something goes wrong behind the scenes, audio, video, timing scuffs happen all the time, and every day of an event is just constant high stress. but ive been to these events and asked people how they feel and in general its like those scuffs never happened. when people come together to celebrate or enjoy something or someone they really love, they forgive or overlook the minor issues and focus on the fun and excitement that the event brings. yeah some people overreact to the scuffs but if everything else is done well enough and the majority are having fun, then those negative opinions dont really matter. basically, "ignore the haters", which I know is cliche but at scale it seems like thats all one can do. focusing on the meat of your content over trying to satisfy every nitpicker seems like the right play 💙 and also like anyone complaining about crashouts clearly hasn't been in the vtuber community long, there's so much drama and breakdowns all over the place - ive watched crashout streams from others in the past, too. vtubing is such a high stress job, and i feel like anyone with high stress jobs are just barely holding on now. hell i work 2 jobs and I feel like every day is just 1 slip into a breakdown, but luckily finding you has kept me going 💙 💙 so if you're feeling that way, too, then I hope I can return the favor as much as I can with these comments 💙💙💙 thinking of you lots, Zen, have a great week!

Karoh

A lot of people only pretend to be organized... Even huge corporations run on last-minute deadlines. I appreciate you sharing your feelings with us. Psychological topics tend to be convoluted, but I cheer you on to reach a point you are satisfied with yourself.

Space

public image can be a full time job , the more famous you are the more attention you get .. from all kinds of people .. and people are selfish . in need of entertainement and lash out at everything nowadays... i don't envy your position and i hope the support you receive from this is worth the effort. you're doing a damn good job and i really like your work. if you need to let it out even on the very few days i have off im not gonna complain because it's time i get to spend cheering my oshi and telling her she's a good girl and she's worth all the praises we throw her way :) . also a week off does not equal working overtime once you're back. take it easy and get back into business at your own pace . :D will miss you though :(