Home
Creators
Search Recent Random
Posts
Search DMs Popular Hash Lookup Tags Random
Importer
Import FAQ
Register Favorites Keys Review DMs Logout
Community
Telegram ThePornDude
Home Creators Posts Import Register Favorites Logout

poem (Patreon)

Published:
2023-11-14 11:32:56
Edited:
2025-02-06 19:32:36
Imported:
2023-11
Tags:

Content

a poem, for now has no name, was clearly thinking about mass off the back of the last post, gave it a fun lil framing device

...in png form bc formatting...

(the image above is the first photograph ever taken in 1838..third stanza)

Files

Comments

Avery Pickup

oh this is good. oh this is so so good

OiBoy

bruuuuvvvvv you're going to make people cry . . . and they wont know why

A. Jordan

The tears of the girl, were they watched from beyond the screen of another, torn for fear of their own tears being misunderstood, or did they share the cry together? I wonder

Toby

Not to detract from the poem itself, but that first photograph is beautiful. The black-and-white aesthetic is one that I find unapologetically visually appealing, but also the camera obscura which was the device used to capture the image is a fascinating piece of foundational vintage tech that I got to experience for myself recently. :)

Danielle Brown

for me, the "stay with me now" line invoked jorie graham… *loved* the line: "eraser stains and the silence / left after glass rain" (though my brain somehow first read it as: "eraser stains of silence / and the glass left after rain" ;)

Brendan Elbin

new here and this is one of my favorite poems you’ve written. I won’t pretend to get it all but there’s a sense of eternity, or something like the continuing human story in the poem that, despite everything you talked about in the last post, is somewhat unique to religion/spirituality.

savannah brown

you got everything you needed to!..thank u for reading, 'this is one of my favorite poems of yours' on a new poem is the best compliment

leets

this is incredible and invokes such feeling, such wistful almost yearning

savannah brown

have spent all evening reading her, wasn't familiar before now..wow. thank u! (ps used WOPE a little for this one..is wonderful at pointing out lazy images..obviously couldn't really communicate the format to it..i found a lot of what it caught were things i was going to address in self-edits but it's great for double-checking an idea is coming across, that's where it was most helpful, asking what it thought of specific lines etc)

Danielle Brown

tres cool, on all fronts! so, if you have a chance to pick up jorie's "The Errancy" (1997), "Never" (2002), and/or "Swarm" (2001)—pretty much recommended in that order—her work has been an enormous inspiration for me. also, i think she's up for the Pulitzer this year. I so love you're using WOPE especially because I was just working on upgrading it last night

Danielle Brown

PS have you tried using WOPE for entire iterative drafts of the same poem

Leetelite

Always thought the piano was my favourite string instrument, but this poem made a pretty convincing argument for the human body holding that position. What veins were plucked to produce such forlorn yearning? Ah well, it's all good, since we're surely doing all the right things for the right reasons!

Bobo Boom

I like this, it's rare for me to enjoy poetry in written form (I know I know how did I even end up here?), but this captured my attention. The extra white-space somehow gave it a pacing that held a tension I normally only feel when poetry is recited or sung. Sav, have you ever considered a collaboration with musicians, using your poetry as lyrics? It may be my adhd, but I listen to poetry in lyrics much more easiliy, when it is supported by good music. A lot of songs are simple lyrics, but I feel old Marillion lyrics by Fish, or lyrics by Dead Can Dance can hold up to modern poetry in every aspect. In a way it makes the audience for a poem smaller, because now people have to like the poetry -and- the music. But it also widens it, because many people who wouldn't generally pick up a poetry bundle (like myself) will listen to music, and will get curious about the tale being told.

Rory V.

didn't comment here when i first read this but it has since dug its little claws into my brain and now i'm sat here reading it over n over ...someone said this already but i do think this is one of my favs of yrs. imagery is wonderful in a way that grows like the dawn, or something. love the formatting ... delicious

Black_Cat

Love this poem and this picture just is so black metal coded to me lol

Hale Briner

first there was yawp . . . . . . an image of ourselves (to) land without histry