Midnight Pals: Barbarian Bros (Patreon)

Poe: [stripping to reveal his swimmer's physique] so while i'm telling this story, i'm just gonna swim a few laps here in the potomacWilliam Hope Hodgson: please feel free!Hodgson: [muscles bulging as he does crunches] do you mind if i bench press this enormous weight while i listen?Poe: Not at all!Lovecraft:

Lovecraft: you know, guys, i consider myself quite manly myselfKing:Poe:Barker:Koontz:Lovecraft: heir to a great tradition of barbarian machismoKing:Poe:Barker:Koontz:

Lovecraft: yeah you know i'm kind of likeLovecraft: a xanthochroic Nordic warriorBarker:Poe: cliveBarker: i literally have nothing to say edgarBarker: i am speechless

Barker: so howardBarker: you think you're like some kind of reincarnation of heroic barbarism?Lovecraft: yes iLovecraft: ohhhhLovecraft: you pushed the air at me too hard when you talked just nowLovecraft: i'm having the vapors :C

Lovecraft: it's not fair, edgar and William are so swoleLovecraft: all the guys think i'm a wimpSonia Greene: oh you're not a wimp howardGreene: you're just incredibly physically weakLovecraft:Lovecraft: i dunno, that's not really making me feel any better

Greene: would you like to play xanthochroic Nordic warlord?Greene: would that make you feel better?Lovecraft: yes pleaseLovecraft: grr! boo! look at me! i'm a xanthochroic Nordic from the damp forests of Germany!Sonia Greene: oh my! My teutonic hero!Lovecraft: grrr! snarl!!!Lovecraft: ohhhLovecraft: i'm out of breath from all this growlingLovecraft: give me a second i have to sit down for a second

Greene: oh my manly teutonic warlordGreene: here drink this hot blood from the skull of a cursed, effeminate celtic foe!Lovecraft: yes! yes! i am the chalk-white conqueror!!Greene: drink some moreGreene: keep drinking

Sonia Greene: so sometimes howard likes to RP that he's a teutonic barbarian and i'm his effete celtic foeAngela Carter: and you're in that?Greene: it's okCarter: SoniaCarter: i think it's time that someone askedCarter: what is SONIA into?Greene: well gosh i mean i'm into the same stuff as everyone else i guessGreene: like what if howard was fatCarter:Greene: i just think it would be interestingCarter:Carter: okCarter: ok actually yeah i can see it