Midnight Pals: Ketamine Bladder (Patreon)

Elon Musk: eyyy stephano king Musk: now that i'ma no worka at doge Musk: i haffa more time to forra da important things Stephen King: oh, like your family? Musk: Musk: no Musk: notta dat

Musk: no that ima no atta da doge, i can spenda my time onna da more important things inna life Musk: like i maka da grok racist King: that can't possibly take up THAT much of your time Musk: also drugs King: oh yeah, that would fill the hours

Musk: eyyyy stephano king you wanta do ketamine witha me? King: no elon I've left those days behind me King: these days, i'm clean and drug-free King: i can never go back King: last time i was on drugs i did something terrible i can never take back King: i wrote cujo

Poe: oh but steve, cujo is a classic of mid-80s suspense! King: yeah but King: it really upset dean King: i can't have that on my conscience Koontz: why? what happened to cujo? cujo was alright, right? King: yes dean he's fine

Musk: eyyyy i lova da ketamine Musk: [wets pants] King: Koontz: Barker: Poe: Lovecraft: King: uh King: elon Musk: maybe you a pedophile

Poe: it's really kinda sad that elon's ketamine addiction causes him to constantly wet his pants Barker: yeah i don't know about that Poe: clive Poe: really Poe: the poor guy is soaked Poe: i mean you almost have to feel sorry for him Barker: yeah Barker: "almost"

Barker: edgar you're being naive Barker: you can't seriously believe a man who attempted to infiltrate the bay area baby furs just "accidentally" made himself incontinent Poe: oh clive that's just a vicious rumor Barker: then why does his official government doge lanyard have marci mcadams art on it

Poe: how do you know about marci mcadams? Barker: because i'm fucking clive barker Barker: that 'what were you doing at the devil's sabbath' shit doesn't work on me

Barker: it really shows how people can interpret similar experiences differently Barker: like HR Giger gets spit roasted by 2 trans women while high on psychedelics and we get Alien Barker: but elon gets spit roasted by 2 trans women while high on psychedelics and we get Barker: whatever all this is