Midnight Pals: Statement of Support (Patreon)

JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: i'm jussst here to sset the record sstraight Rowling: becaussse there'sss been a lot of sslander about me in the yellow presssss lately Barker: i thought you owned the press Rowling: i mean, effectively

Rowling: look i'm jusst a regular perssson Rowling: i put my sscottish mansssion on one leg at a time jusst like any other billionaire

Rowling: when i'm not dessstroying international human rightsss organizationss or ssending hate mail to a cartoon alien, i like to relax on my sssuper yacht with a nice cigar and a glassss of wine Rowling: you know, jusst regular thingss

Rowling: now sssome clickbait articlesss would have you believe that i tweeted and then deleted a sstatement in sssupport of transss women Rowling: but the quessstion you have to asssk yoursself isss Rowling: did i really?

Rowling: doess it make sssensse Rowling: with everything that you know of the world Rowling: that i would do sssuch a thing? King: well when you put it like that King: no King: no not really

King: b-but maybe King: maybe you actually did and just forgot about it? King: like another middle aged moment but in reverse? King: that could have happened, right? King: right??

King: i mean, in the infinite realms of possibility it might have happened King: please say it happened King: i want to wear my hufflepuff scarf without people yelling at me again :( Barker: steve you're embarrassing yourself

Rowling: bah!! i would never contradict mysself like that! Rowling: you should only expect completely coherent and noncontradictory ssstatementsss from me! Rowling: i am NOT ssome wacko! Black Mold: freemasons run the country! King: what was that? Rowling: nothing