Midnight Pals: Spooky Doll (Patreon)

James Wan: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the spooky doll King: oo a spooky doll? nice Wan: yeah and not just any spooky doll Wan: this one's a spooky VICTORIAN doll King: oo i hope it's made of porcelain Poe: gotta have the porcelain

Wan: and guess what? this spooky porcelain victorian doll Wan: it's also got a cracked face with a missing eye King: whoa whoa whoa! that's going a little too far don't you think? King: i mean, we all like scary but that's a little TOO scary King: you're gonna give dean nightmares! Koontz: [cries]

Koontz: is the spooky doll real??? is it going to get me? King: no dean it's just a story King: there aren't any spooky dolls in real life Wan: don't tell the kid that Wan: my stories are ripped from the headlines!

Wan: that's right Wan: you think annabelle isn't real? Wan: annabelle is VERY real Wan: are you ready for the heart-stopping terror of the scariest doll that you've ever seen????? Wan: BEHOLD!!!! THE SPOOKY DOLL IRL!!! King: Koontz: Lovecraft: Poe: Barker: Barker: that's a fuckin raggedy ann doll

Wan: ok so maybe i exaggerated the spookiness of the doll slightly for artistic effect Wan: but this doll is still pretty scary, you gotta admit Koontz: she looks like the digital circus doll

Wan: so anyway this guy gets a message that he must return to the town of Spookington Hollow Wan: the spookiest town in the world Wan: its primary exports are gross old timey toys Wan: you know, creepy victorian dolls, creaky old ventriloquist dummies, and also very obviously evil jack in the boxes

Wan: it's just another day in spookington hollow Wan: the blue-filtered town where the warble of a discordant music box presages unsettling events to come Wan: things are pretty quiet in spookington falls since the old evil puppet factory closed down

Wan: it's a town that consists entirely of multiple derelict victorian theaters and also one very overgrown graveyard Wan: the only existing business in town is the mortician Wan: luckily, people are constantly dying in spectacularly grisly ways so business is booming!

Wan: don't think that's scary? Wan: just wait until you see this opening montage Wan: there's SO MANY scratches on the film King: hmm i dunno Wan: also we found a real jaunty 1920s "monsters of megaphone" type song and slowed it down King: oh shit!! now THAT'S what i call scary!