Midnight Pals: Universal Monsters (Patreon)

Stephen King: guys! guess what!King: i just got back from the univera Frankenstein animatronic sound and stage spectacular ride probably in universal studios or something!King: and boy are my arms tired!Koontz:Poe:Barker:Lovecraft:Joe Hill: you told it wrong, dadKing: ok wait let me start over

King: the important thing is they have a Frankenstein ride!Mary Shelley: does it suckKing: no no it's great!Shelley: is it nowShelley: that hasn't been my experience with Frankenstein adaptations

King: no see first of all, there's igorShelley: oh yeah we're off to a great startShelley: fuckin' igor!King: everyone loves igor, maryKing: he's like the Gollum of Frankenstein

King: anyway then the granddaughter of dr FrankensteinShelley: whoa whoa whoaShelley: there's a girl Frankenstein?Dan Simmons: wow i can't believe Frankenstein went wokeShelley: shut your pie hole danShelley: this just got interesting

King: so the lady FrankensteinShelley: you mean the lady DR FrankensteinKing: yeah sure the lady dr FrankensteinKing: she's on a quest to subjugate the greatest monster of allKing: DRACULA!Bram Stoker: what

Mary Shelley: holy shitShelley: i changed my mind this rulesBram Stoker: no no no!Stoker: no i don't like this!Stoker: Dracula would never be mommy dommed!Shelley: oh Dracula is absolutely a subby bitch and you know it

Stoker: no way!!!Stoker: Dracula is 100% pred!Stoker: stop ruining Dracula!Stoker: no woman could stop him!Stoker: sure, maybe, like, a strapping heroic man could make a valiant effortStoker: maybe a man with a ten gallon hat

Shelley: oh, like a fuckin cowboy?Stoker: itStoker: [sweats] it wouldn't HAVE to be a cowboyStoker: but yeah like a cowboy maybe could do it

King: so then all the monsters join in!King: and it's a battle royale between Dracula, Frankenstein, the phantom of the operaKing: put the wolfman on drums… let the mummy play bass…Poe: give the thing a guitar!Poe: there's no time to waste!

Mike Flanagan: i don't understand why the monsters always have to fightFlanagan: why can't they just get along?Flanagan: maybe have a party or something?Flanagan: in factFlanagan: it might sound a little something like this…