Midnight Pals: Black Terror (Patreon)

Patricia Highsmith: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, I call this the tale of the charming sociopathDean Koontz: tell the story about the black terror!Highsmith: ehhhKoontz: I like when he hits the bad guys andHighsmith: okay ya twisted my arm, here’s the story of the black terror

Highsmith: so there’s this superhero called the black terrorHighsmith: and he’s got this girlfriend named jean starrHighsmith: wotta dame! Real paira stems on herKoontz: how did the black terror get his powersHighsmith: what? I dunno, from ants or somethingHighsmith: but as I was sayin, this jean starr

Highsmith: now jean starr, she’s a real lookerHighsmith: a real sheba McWowWowHighsmith: a real hotsy totsyHighsmith: a real dynamite dameHighsmith: [dramatically dousing herself with convenient bucket of water]

Koontz: how did he get powers from antsHighsmith: what? I dunno, he inhaled a powder he made from antsHighsmith: now jean starrKoontz: how did he make get ant powder?Highsmith: I don’t know, he’s a pharmacistKoontz: butHighsmith: JESUS CHRIST, DEANHighsmith: SHUT UP

Koontz: who does he fight?Highsmith: I don’t know, bad guysKoontz: but which bad guys?Highsmith: you knowHighsmith: the usualHighsmith: robots, gangstersHighsmith: maybe the odd alienHighsmith: who gives a shit

Angela Carter: interesting story, patriciaCarter: what if he encountered a female villain who was his match?Carter: I think that would be very empoweringHighsmith: oh yeah and she’s gotta be hotCarter: oh she doesn’t need to be hotHighsmith: no no I heard ya loud and clear

Angela Carter: so you’ve worked a lot with this black terror conceptHighsmith: yeah he’s public domainCarter: no! you fool! don’t say-Alan Moore: [appearing in flash of smoke] DOTH THE ARCH MAGUS HEAR YON PUBLIC DOMAIN SUPER HERO???

Moore: stand aside, mortals! The arch magus must work his magic toMoore: reimagine this property!Moore: [furrows forehead in concentration while pondering orb]Moore: what if Moore: what if the black terror was very very old and he was fucking a hot young co-ed?

Highsmith:Highsmith: well I like the second part of that