Midnight Pals: Long Longfellow War (Patreon)

King: hey edgar how's it going? King: you still fighting your little longfellow war? Poe: i will fight it as long as i have to, steve Poe: the world must know that longfellow is a maudlin hack Poe: and waif sucks ass Samantha Kolesnik: Poe: no no i mean longfellow's waif

Poe: my next editorial will deliver the killing blow Poe: that wealthy & triumphant gentleman of elegant leisure! ooo he burns me up! Koontz: edgar! i have an idea for your next editorial! Poe: thanks dean but i don't really need Koontz: "longfellow? more like wrong smello!" Poe:

Koontz: get it? "wrong smello" Poe: yes dean i get it Koontz: can you use that? Poe: i Poe: Poe: well Barker: ha ha yeah edgar CAN YOU? Poe: clive Barker: you should definitely use that King: actually it is pretty funny Poe: don't you start too now steve

Poe: look i don't need help in my little longfellow war Poe: i am perfectly capable of owning longfellow on my own Barker: oh yeah how you gonna do that? Poe: simple Poe: with facts and logic Poe: by the end you might say that longfellow will be Poe: hoisted by his own petard

Barker: oh my god edgar you're so bad at this Barker: don't you know the first thing about starting a flame war? Poe: what are you talking about, i'm holding my own Barker: ok so first you need to make some sock puppet King: he's got outis Barker: oh right he does have outis

Poe: that's not me Barker: right right Barker: the guy who's been prolonging your little fight for you Poe: that's not me Barker: Barker: uh huh Poe: you can't prove anything Barker: right

Poe: this guy, outis, that i've been arguing with is clearly a longfellow superfan Poe: look at the shit he posts Poe: "longfellow is great! i love longfellow because i am very stupid and have no taste dur duh" Barker: great work, edgar Poe: that's not me!! Barker: real subtle