Midnight Pals: Tape Worms (Patreon)

Mira Grant: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the parasite that makes you into a zombieGrant: so they genetically engineer a tape worm that cures everythingGrant: so everyone gets one implantedGrant: but they were, all of them, decieved

Grant: so everyone has an implanted tapewormGrant: and also people start turning into zombiesKing: oh that’s a weird coincidence! Poe: I bet those two things are relatedKing: waitKing: wait you think?Poe: well it would stand to reasonGrant: have you guys heard this story before?

Grant: our hero is this girl who got in a massive car accidentGrant: that gave her brain damage that made her more agreeableGrant: she got reverse Phineas Gaged

Grant: now that this girl is so agreeable, everyone she meets wants to tell her their life storyGrant: which is really convenient for me, the storyteller!Grant: let’s get some exposition goinggggg

Grant: so the tapeworm makes people into zombiesBogleech: you act like the tapeworm is doing this on purposeBogleech: it’s just trying to survive in its own way!Grant: people are dyingBogleech: [huffing indignantly] I don’t have to sit here and take this slander!

Grant: now civilization is collapsing because of tapeworm zombiesPoe: oh careful this story’s getting a little intense for deanGrant: but also our hero got a dogKoontz: a dog?!Poe: think you’ve had enough dean, you’re getting hyperKoontz: i want to stay up and hear about the dog!Poe: come on dean let’s goKoontz: you’re not the boss of me! I want to stay and hear about the dog!