Midnight Pals: The Most Divorced Man Returns (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures]JK Rowling: hello childrenRowling: today we continue our quessst to rehabilitate glinnerRowling: i will not ressst until he isss reintegrated into ssocietyRowling: and not ssleeping on my couch anymore

Rowling: cuz you knowRowling: that man isssRowling: i mean ssure i hate transs people tooRowling: but i have other interesstsss assss wellRowling:Rowling: i'll let you know asss sssoon asss i think of sssome

Rowling: i do have other interesstsss outsside of transsphobiaRowling: likeRowling: for exampleRowling: i like hating on autissstic people tooRowling: i mean, let's be frankRowling: they've had it too good for too long

Rowling: and, you know, dissabled peopleRowling: and the goblinsssRowling: in fact actually i'm pretty versssatileRowling: i'm almossst as well-rounded as hp lovecraft if you think about it

Graham Lineham: jk did you know that trans people have smaller skull shapesRowling: it's 1 pm graham, why are you sstill in pajamasLineham: i've been researching how the trans control the mediaRowling: did you even try to look for a job today

Rowling: graham here's the newssspaperRowling: hey maybe you could look at the want adsssRowling: bet there'sss plenty of openingsss for a transsphobic comedy writerLineham: i don't read newspapers, i heard that the wood pulp industry is captured by trans activistsLineham: they put estrogen in the news inkLineham: you knowLineham: to get youRowling:Rowling: wait really?Rowling: shit maybe i should sstart possting that

Rowling: graham ssseriousssly Rowling: you could at leassst applyLineham: no everyone's against meLineham: there's no jobs for a fearless truth teller like meRowling: iRowling: howRowling: we live in england! there'sss nothing BUT jobsss for transsphobesss!Rowling: how are you still unemployed!?!

Rowling: look jussst march into the BBC and asssk if they're hiring any transsphobesssRowling: maybe they'll be impressssed with your moxie and hire youLineham: it doesn't work like that these daysRowling: jusst wear a sssuit and ssit in the lobby til they hire you!

Lineham: i've got a great idea to get back in people's good graces!Rowling: whatss thatLineham: well you know how david tennant is the most beloved man in the country?Rowling: rightLineham: well if i can bring him down, then i will assume his placeLineham: as the most beloved man in the countryRowling:Rowling: right ok that makess ssensse to me

Rowling: look i clipped out a bunch of adss for transphobic jobssRowling: i'll jussst ssend them to graham'ss agentHelen Joyce: terrible news, dark lord!Joyce: his agent dropped him for attacking david tennantRowling:Rowling: oh