R8 Book Vote 4: Bordellos vs. Artifacts (Patreon)

Match 4 in the Round of 8. Cast your vote at the bottom -- winner advances!

(And don't forget to vote on the other three matches, all posted now!)

"The Third-Best Bordello in All of Sioux City, Iowa"vs."A Race Against Time to Recover the Artifact!"

What happens when you spill bourbon on an old Louis L'Amour novel and wipe up the mess with a Mr. Boston's Cocktail Guide? Why, "The Third-Best Bordello in All of Sioux City, Iowa," That's what happens! First and foremost, this is a story about entrepreneurship. Sure, it just so happens that the entrepreneurial venture in question is an establishment of questionable repute (proudly holding the bronze medal in Sioux City's moderately competitive hospitality industry), but who cares? After the crooked mayor is found tied up in a cattle rustlin' conspiracy, our three heroines quickly discover that running the place mostly consists of refereeing bar fights, getting tanked, and gently reminding traveling salesmen that emotional vulnerability is gonna... cost ya' extra.

Then there's "A Race Against Time to Recover the Artifact!," where the entire book is spent in a mad-dash through ancient temples, or in museums, where ancient mysteries have been hidden in plain sight. There are also a few... tee-hee-hee... booby traps that somehow remained fully operational for the last two thousand years despite receiving absolutely no maintenance. Every clue is hidden inside another clue. And those clues? They have clues, too! Every villain has an accent that becomes thicker whenever they're about to betray somebody. The artifact in question will changed hands no fewer than 11 times. Olga will say, "It belongs in a museum!" Then she'll steal it. It's going to make the straight to streaming "National Treasure 6" look like Raiders of the Lost Ark.