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D&D Court: Bonus Cases - Unmovable Grandmas and Pissing Paladins (Patreon)

Published:
2025-07-25 19:32:50
Imported:
2026-06
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Dungeon Court is STILL in session! Join Justices Murphy, Tanner and Axford, along with Bailey, as they continue to pass judgement on your trials at the table!

CREDITS:

Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon

Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller

Files

Comments

Valerie

Right as I opened the app to check!

Caleb B

Yes! Saved from a boring work friday!

Rob H.

Dropped just in time for the dog's afternoon walk. Ember and I thank you.

Rafi

Caldwell mixing up P5: Royal with P4 Golden 🙂‍↔️

Cody Zimmer

When I am in my 70s, I hope Emily is recording D&D podcasts as a granny and I get to listen to her troll all of the youngins

clerby

omg emily is schooling people on religion im so locked in!!

Doctor Ransom

Easily dropped some serious quaterage playing House of the Dead at the arcade in the 90’s. Loved that game so hard. Let the bodies hit the floor, y’all.

Stefan UrKILL (Figgy)

I’m truly unsure if there is anything more annoying than the idea of a Reddit atheist being allowed to create their own character in a CANONICALLY MAGICAL world full of CANONICAL GODS. It reads like that situation was just so that person could act out their shitty terminally online atheist impulses for a captive audience.

clerby

i am sitting alone in the woods and cackled so loud when emily said she has over 1000 bones that some child prob thinks i’m a witch

Clever Innuendo

Was that 'atheist' played by Kevin Sorbo? Also, the term is 'apostate'.

Grant Kenny

I was just about to post this. All that claimed Persona Knowledge and he named the wrong remaster 😭

Hammy

I love any case that involves a grandma. My grandma never played D&D but I bet she would have enjoyed it and would have trolled me. She was known to actively cheat during family game night.

gerard

I would like to add to the giant rat case, if the sorcerer had said ANYTHING but kick I wouldn't have had the rat turn back into a Giant

AnxiousAmphibian

Couldn't the punt count as a shove attack, which does no damage?

Nick Neverman

Um actually Caldwell, it’s Persona 5 Royal. Golden is an updated version of Persona 4 (sorry, I had to say something)

CSN

"God is not dead" was just on the Reddit front page today from r/shittymoviedetails calling out his laughable portrayal of an atheist stereotype. The word that comes to mind for me is antitheist, but several of these probably apply to varying degrees. It's just a relief to hear anyone speaking publicly have the nuance to understand that atheist means disbelief, not "angry Redditor stereotype". Emily rocks.

CSN

May your stump ever be generously filled with brown leaves.

Rob T

I can’t believe that Caldwell called persona five Royale persona five golden when that is persona four gold. It’s like he doesn’t even know the game at all.

Alex H.

fun fact: atheism is an option in pathfinder character creation since you normally have to pick a favored god, and is basically the theological equivalent of being an anarchist. they're a person who obviously knows the gods are literally real but rejects their authority/superiority. It sounds like that's what this guy was going for but he did it in the most annoying way possible.

Jordan Marschke

LET CALDWELL SPEAK ABOUT ALTUS GAMES 2025

MaidOfCake

Murph is throwing a lot of heat for someone who had his character shit on the floor.

Zoop

As someone who used to work at my university’s library, that confession was so funny. Sounds like yall need an aggressive bell to ring for progressively longer 30min to closing, 10 min to closing and 5 min to closing-that’s what we did and it worked quite well lol

🐧lost penguin familiar

That cowboy steam punk game: dnd is at it's peak when friends get together and are equally invested into the game/ story. I could see a 30min mini session being fun (when rare and special), as long as the players share their growth/experience with the team. As long as it's building the group's story as well.

wick

Uhm, actually, it’s Royal.

diintz

i hope caldwell knows that every time he talks about persona i feel seen, LET HIM SPEAK!! XD

Bills Mcblow

"greetings yon judges"<- found the Dark Tower fan

Cody Zimmer

It feels like the rat kicker just needed a "case" to type in to D&D court, and didn't have a more real grievance available.

Michelle Spurgeon

We need to start getting ages of grandmas. Not all grandmas are little old ladies. 40 year old can be grandmas. Just saying

Adam!!!!!

binky fiasco is waiting to burst out of emily's body

Mikel

In this lamp, rats ride loose (with Jafar)

Lorelei and Kyra Newly Weds

The rat kicker could have just grappled the rat and thrown it, yes it would change back but it would be after it's a distance away, then you can move

Brian McAree Murphy

If I was the cleric or paladin at this point I would stop any divine healing as punishment from their god. At a certain point you are alive in a world where gods exist, not liking them is fine, but expecting them to not be petty about it is ridiculous.

Garments

Something tells me we will be seeing jafar in the next surprise round

Lauren

Me, bracing myself for the Jafar dilemmas next Surprise Round episode

Whitney Hempsey

As a brand new grandma I am so pleased to learn that grandmas are allowed to troll.

Whitney Hempsey

I’m a 40 year old grandma with a week old granddaughter. Can’t wait to teach her that grandmas are allowed to troll.

rosebramblewolf

But the grandkids of 40 year olds are not old enough to be listening to this podcast.

Michelle Spurgeon

Right I'm just saying they asign cute little old lady status and I think we need more information lol

Joe

Bursting out of my chrysalis to tell Caldwell that the expanded edition of Persona 5 is called “Persona 5 Royal” and that Golden is for Persona 4

Hamster Nipples

2 HOURS! They had 2 hours and they didn't show off their character once?! Lol there's more to it

The Wizard Stream

The "atheist" feels like an anti-theist (player and character) and their character (presumably in a world with multiple gods whose presence cant be doubted) is irreligious not atheist. Like gods obviously exist in this world and the character ideally wouldnt believe in deference to them LIKE DEADEYE CYBIN!!! But they've played them like an anti-theist from our world

Bep Bingus

To clarify a bit, we only do the one-on-ones maybe every 6 or 7 sessions? Usually after a big boss when the story cools down a bit. So it's like a special occasion and a chance to talk to your fav NPCs or do some spying or crafting etc. the characters usually end up getting gifts for each other in the downtime too haha

pluckythechicken

"Water into wine, piss into healing" is a great chest tattoo

Riley Deveau

So in terms of the private dnd sessions, we run a channel on discord called “In Game Chat” Essentially it’s written RP in between sessions assuming they’re at a spot where they bc an comfortably role play, but it’s all written so I (the DM) and the other players can see the interaction. I find it really drives character development and also lets people also do stuff outside of our sessions. Weird to make it like, private tho. Not weird maybe just exclusive and unnecessary

Samuel Gray

“I think I have more than a thousand bones” Emily Axford

Hammy

“Hell, it could be Jafar himself”

Kitt

Omg Murph describing the Trinyvale triplets as the ‘worst characters possible for that situation’ made me realise that Trinyvale is DnD Always sunny in Philadelphia 😂 terrible characters being funny in terrible ways

Totally Offside

I like how aghast Murph is at the dude who pissed in the cup when he had his character take a dump in the BBEGs secret chest of relics in Skaldova like 5 weeks ago lol.

Alan Ma

Jafar is loose. You have zero bars.

Admarant

Rat kick in 2024 rules an unarmed strike has three options, only one of which deals damage. In 2024 they could attempt a shove without damage

Mnixon

Thank u Mr brurph

With Quiet Eyes

I think the private sessions case probably also exists for practical scheduling reasons

The Wizard Syndicate

The submitter didn’t mention what the dm did during the rogue pissing in the cup thing. My thought process was that the dm just said “ok” and then moved on when the rogue said he pissed in the cup. And I can’t think of anything more damning than that to a joke made at the table. Not laughing, not reacting, just moving on.

Danny Storm

Should have just thrown the rat tbh

Shan

Caldwell u RUBE

Frogndog

It's ACKSHULLY Persona FOUR Golden and Persona FIVE Royal.

Desiree

caldwell is there to represent my niche: haikyuu and persona games

Two Deers Beep

😐 me hearing yet another Jafar joke

Stephen Fike

Giving blasting grandma vibes

Liam Harvey

Piss cup guy should have gotten the divine punishment of an Indiana Jones Villain. Like picking the wrong cup when choosing the holy grail or something

Ganpan14O

I feel like calling the player's character an atheist might just be the submitter pulling from the words they're familiar with

John Tackels

Now hear me out ok just hear me put judges i hate to be this guy but in rogues defense….. you guys do like randomly cum and fuck with shit a lot 😂 jens juggles knives to cover testicle. Now i love these things but maybe the rogue (who doesn’t understand atheism) just thought it was funny. Yal are the best please spare my judgement 😂😂 i am a simple member of the jury

Bunnarchist

I mean I feel like there's a definite difference here in vibes, because naddpod is all about dumb bits with low brow humor, this just feels like trying to be funny in a serious big moment without reading the room

Totally Offside

For sure. But it's a funny juxtaposition, you must admit.

Lee Mays

I don't usually comment on these things but I think in the case of the downtime DM the gang might have overanalyzed their way into a decision forgetting the original premise which happens every now and then. The assertion became that the DM was creating disconnect within the group with these offline 1 on 1's with the implication that the DM was running them often. The original submission said the campaign includes "chunks of downtime between BIGGER events" where these 1 on 1's take place. That could be as infrequent as once every 5 - 10 sessions or possibly even more, in which case I think the level of "disconnect" with the players would be minimal if not non-existent. Which then highlights why the concern was DM's concern was with the players initiating their own 1 on 1's seemingly OUTSIDE of this regulated time or perhaps frequently on their own schedule. Even if it's just for flavour as mentioned, THAT would be the thing that would cause the disconnect in the party, not the DM's initiative for player agency. I think I felt sorry for the DM with them ruling against them based on the idea that they disconnected their group which I don't think they had done at all. Anyway, loved the show still, just wanted to add my 2 cents. Cheers!

my guy

it’s also in the context of the table all finding it funny and doing it on a comedy podcast. campaign 3 spoilers ahead: this would be more like saul or caulder pissing on oberons tree as kali was trying to bargin with him for her mothers soul. there are times and places for those shenanigans but you gotta read the room

bretpop

I feel, they greatly over estimate what the downtime session are. It was said to be 20 to 30 minutes? I'd think that more like "boring stuff" I play a wizard I want spells I want to go to book stores or something to find spells to copy, my other players wouldn't and be so bored doing watching me do that.

bretpop

I must add the Caldwell talking about persona hurt me, and I feel bad for the DM for having to play persona 1 and 2 it very unlikely he is ready for that...

AlbireoRising

"If you lived through the Great Depression you can do whatever you want" ......Who's going to tell them that there are plenty of grandmas who were born in the 70s? (And grandmas old enough to have GMing grandkids were born in the 50s)

Jarred Williams

I believe the term is misotheism, or a hatred of god. Although, misotheism doesn't deny that god exists, just that the person hates it, and possibly believes the deity to be evil like dystheism. Anti-theist is probably closest. But you CAN be atheist in d&d; you just treat the gods like powerful creatures instead of gods. Done and done.

Jarred Williams

Also; I do mini one on one backstory moments with my players, at the table, with everyone else there. They love it, and it has not once "split" the mindset or focus of the group. I usually only do one characters per session, and not at every session.

Nitzan Harel

In a more spy-type game, I think it’s more okay to have secrets. Although, in my blades in the dark game (which is what they probably played), we had a ton of fun planning and optimizing our downtimes together.

HeyYeah

anti-theism and atheism are not mutually exclusive, and gods may exist, but they don't need to be referred to or worshipped as gods. The planescape setting (at least in 2e) had atheists who referred to gods as powers and refused to worship them because they just saw them as very powerful beings that anyone could possibly become.

Martin Kallus

Idk, I looked it up and could not find where unarmed strikes deal a minimum of 1 damage. If the character has at least a -1 modifier for strength, the rat would take 0 damage, leaving it still at 1 hp and unchanged.

riskutforthebriskut

anybody who is an atheist in a game where there are literal Gods amongst men HAS to be an insufferable reddit atheist... there is no exception to this rule lmao

riskutforthebriskut

i would say you absolutely do 1hp of damage when you kick a ball... thats why a ball gets wear and tear over time lmao kick a ball 100 times and tell me it looks the same as before

el

I think that was their point though; if the other players are there at the table listening to the one on ones, they still feel included in the individuals storylines and can then play their characters in a way that helps follow those storylines/facilitate growth. if the one on ones happen without the rest of the party present, that cant happen and you dont get to see those secret scenes which can be really fun to watch and know about even if you arent actively speaking during it

Spades Pendragon

Grandma cases make me want to have kids in the hopes I could be a grandma one day. I don't like or want kids. I'm not even a woman. But I feel the call of the cheeky grandma trolling