Ailana’s Diary — 2025-12-01 (Patreon)

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GOOD MORNING

Plot twist! No shower today. I took a bath, a long hot soak. It’s a gray, dreary day, and I thought a hot soak would be nice.

And it was.

In about an hour, I’m taking Josh and Geoni to the airport. They are Chicago bound, where they will stay until the great convergence in St. Croix on December 20th.

Sasha and Clay will head out once Micah and Jasmine are moved in. They have tickets to St. Croix for the 8th.

After I get Josh and Geoni dropped off, I’m meeting Dad. You might remember yesterday he said he wanted to talk about things in the future. So, that’s happening midday today.

I’ll share with you, if it’s not something he means to keep private. At the very least, I’ll show you my lunch! We’re going to Denny’s.

If you’re new to my story, I guess I should just say Denny’s holds a special place in my heart. When I was growing up, Dad would save up and it would be our special treat.

I’m sharing a picture from “Growing Up Ailana” from my Sixteenth Birthday (January 1, 2013). We spent the day together and at the end, we stopped at a Denny’s to celebrate. It is one of my fondest memories.

Jason and I would also go there during our senior year when we finally realized we had been dating all along. A lot of long, deep talks took place over Lumberjack Slams and various burger combos.

So, if you think I am a little obsessive about Denny’s you’re probably right!

That’s all for now. See you at lunch!

The Storylines are the heart of Ailana Geven Imagines, and they are found in the Collections section of the site.

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All characters in this story are fictional characters, their images generated with AI for AGI Stories. They do not represent any real person, nor is their appearance based on any real human.

THINK ABOUT IT

My love for Dad exceeds my capacity to express it with words. Since I was in sixth grade back in 2008, it’s been him and me pushing through all the tough times together. He put me first, always thinking of what was best for me. His love for me urged him to set aside what he wanted for himself in order to provide what I needed growing up.

Today, I wanted to feed him to the sharks.

Lunch at Denny’s started as expected. He told me about a few things happening with Grammy and at his work. He asked about getting Josh and Geoni off to Chicago.

Then, he smiled and said, “So a new year is coming up… Do you see any changes coming your way?”

“Well, SwimFit is going to get really busy,” I said. “And I think Naomi will be sending us more work. Josh and Jason are itching to do another road trip to collect material…”

He interrupted me. “Ailana Cailin Geven, do you know how old you are?”

Using my middle name like that, I felt like I was about twelve, and he’d caught me up past bedtime reading books by flashlight. “Dad?”

“You will be twenty-nine years old at 8:44 a.m. exactly one month from now.”

I had no idea where he was going. “Yes… Dad? What’s this about?”

“Your future…”

“My future?”

“Are you even thinking about marriage?”

My jaw dropped. In my head, I was looking for a shark tank. Either he or I needed to be fed to the sharks! I couldn’t even reply.

“Sweetie, you told me you never dated anyone after college when you were modeling…”

That was correct. I had a few dates, but it was fast-paced, business first, get the work done, move on to the next job.

The rest of this Chapter is exclusive to Patreon.

Dad didn’t wait for me to answer. “So, in reality, you’ve only ever dated Jason. And he’s only ever dated you. He’s twenty-nine, too.”

Jason’s birthday was on November 15.

I still couldn’t find words. “Ailana, how long are you going to make him wait?”

Finally, I formed a thought. “He hasn’t complained.”

“He wouldn’t, now would he?”

“I think he’s happy,” I said.

“Is he? But would he be happier if you didn’t have the door to marriage closed and locked tight?”

“Dad, I think Jason is okay with how things are.”

“Is ‘okay’ good enough? For how long? Sure… he’s happy… But I believe you both would be happier if… you…”

I waited. I thought he was going to say something like I needed to stop being stubborn or short-sighted. That wasn’t what he had in mind at all.

Finally, he got it out. “If you stopped thinking marriage is what you saw between your mom and me. If you stopped thinking what she did was anything like what a normal mother would have done. Ailana, what you saw those years… it was not good. And… it was not normal.”

Tears were flooding out of my eyes. I’d never said it. I’d never dared think it. But Dad was right—once more.

I had somehow let what I saw my mother do pollute my idea of what marriage would be like.

“Ailana…” Dad handed me a napkin. “Don’t you want more out of things with Jason?”

I was trying hard to stop crying. “Dad, please… slow down…”

He did.

I took the conversation back to 2008 when she abandoned us. We circled around and around her behavior and the fact that what she did wasn’t normal. He kept pushing into the idea that I was not her and I had no reason to think anything like that was normal.

“What she did shouldn’t have any effect on your future with Jason… or anyone else, for that matter…”

“Anyone else?” I felt myself bristle against that idea—I was seriously looking for a shark tank again. “What do you mean by that?”

“Just…” Dad tried to backtrack. “I’m not assuming anything. Just making a general point. You are not your mother. She hurt you. You bear the scars, but you aren’t the one holding the knife.”

We talked a while longer, but didn’t say anything substantially different. We left the table and stood outside talking even more.

Finally, he had to get back to work.

“Dad, look… I’m not going to say when, but I will tell Jason… something… I’ll let him know the door’s not locked.”

“Well, that’s a start,” Dad reached for a hug, and I moved in close.

I didn’t want to ever let go.

REAL NOW by Jasmine Banks

Shift work like being a CNA and a two-weeks notice don’t always line up. It sure didn’t for me.

I work three twelves a week at my regular job. I put in my two-weeks on the 22nd, which would put two weeks out to December 6. But I worked Sunday, today, and tomorrow.

That’s my three shifts this week. On Wednesday, I can start my new job as Project Assistant for SwimFit and AGI Stories.

I’m not sure who’s more excited—me or Micah! And what’s more, the moving truck comes on Saturday.

I’m mostly speechless about all this. I called Sasha today to tell her my schedule, and she said I could come over on Wednesday and get started or wait for the move.

I’m going on Wednesday. I want to get started learning what to do as soon as possible.

So, that’s what’s happening around here. I still can’t believe it.

GOOD NIGHT

It was a good day for it to be overcast and rainy. It let me stay inside without feeling like I was missing something.

After lunch, I avoided Jason for a little while. Everything was too sensitive. Dad is probably right. Okay is probably not really enough. Jason deserves better.

Eventually, he texted and asked what I was up to. I said I was neck-deep in edits.

I didn’t tell him I was editing everything—things I didn’t even know I believed about myself. I didn’t tell him I didn’t even know where to start.

Never once in my life have I thought I was anything like my mother. Yet somehow, how I saw her treat Dad and me poisoned my view on being a wife and mother.

The very idea of being a wife… tainted by my first 11 years. And as a mother… I was just a little token of what she thought everyone expected. I had to be certain things, wear certain things, say certain things, all to the end of making her think everyone thought she was living up to expectations.

“Text when you get hungry… I’ll make sandwiches or something.”

So, eventually, I wiped off my cry-face and repainted. I didn’t dare tell him what Dad and I had actually talked about.

Instead, Jason and I focused on the weeks to come. The Banks moving in… The trip to St. Croix…

Jason and I went there together for a short stay last winter. He’s looking forward to going again. And so am I.

Now, it’s time to go to bed. Time to sleep. Maybe I’ll dream a happy dream, and if I do, I know Jason will be in it.

But, dreaming something and making the dream real is not easy. I’m sure I’ve written about goals, plans, and all that.

I’m not ready. Bottom line, I still have to deal with my past. And, be sure, I will.

I’m pretty sure “okay” isn’t good enough. Not for Jason. And not for me.

May you learn from your past, live in your present, and plan for a wonderful future.

Good night.

Be your best you!

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