69 – Inclusion: From the Gym and Into the World w/ Tylar Zinn (Patreon)
Content
How can we as teachers, participants, and allies help to build a more inclusive gym and ultimately a more inclusive world? We talk to self-defense and behavioral health trainer Tylar Zinn about training trainers in inclusion and trauma care. This episode is meant to serve as a guide, so please refer back to it and share it with your communities.
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Training Outline for This Episode (Teacher Guide)
Names and pronouns
Why are we here today?
Modeling of respect to each other and gym members
As instructors, coaches, volunteers, etc., modeling the types of behavior and interaction that we want to see is how we can ensure that we meet our goal to be a respected institution
Retaining the right members
If you invite wolves and sheep to a party, only wolves will show up because the sheep will be afraid that they’ll get eaten. If you invite predators and bigots to the gym, the good people that we want to reach will leave because it won’t feel like a safe place for them to be.
How we act is about who we attract and who we retain, it’s not only about possibly saying something hurtful or harmful
We all have areas that we need to work on, and we all need feedback on things we say or do that are not appropriate. This training will help us to give each other support and feedback as we learn.
This is a journey, not a destination. None of us will or should expect to become perfect, so it’s all about the learning and growing.
This training may stretch your comfort zone and teach you new things (or open up whole new areas to learn more about). This is a learning institution, and all of us encourage our members to stretch their comfort zones and learn things that are brand new to them. We are capable of those things as well.
None of us are too set in our ways to learn new things if we’re patient with ourselves and each other; if we were, we wouldn’t be here.
Mental Illness stigmatization
The nature of mental illness (avoiding “just get over it” or “think positive”).
Mental health is the same as physical health in that it is a disease of the brain- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help with some mental health conditions through changing thought patterns, but none of us are therapists and “think positive” doesn’t cut it as a treatment.
Jokes about mental illness (“I’m so OCD”; “Me and my multiple personalities”)
They help to stigmatize mental illness. Stigma causes people with mental health conditions to have lower self-esteem; it makes them less likely to want to talk about their mental health; it keeps them from getting help; and it even causes them to lose opportunities like jobs or accommodations that they need. To be a respectful institution, we need to encourage respect for people with mental health conditions, not make them feel bad. 1 in 5 adults in America has a mental illness, and 1 in 25 have a serious mental illness.
Mental illness, homelessness, and substance use
People who are homeless are much more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators; people with mental illness are much more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators; and people who use substances are more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators. As martial artists we should be helping some of the most vulnerable people in our community. Be careful not to stereotype people who are parts of these communities as the perpetrators when discussing self-defense scenarios.
In 2010, the criminal victimization rate within the homeless community was a massive 34%-89% ratio depending on the region. In stark comparison, housed people boast an average violent crime victimization rate of approximately 1.2%.
Substance use is often caused by people not getting the care they need for mental illness. It is also often caused by trauma or discrimination.
Homelessness is often related to PTSD, being kicked out of the home due to being LGBTQ+, trauma, domestic violence, etc. It’s not a moral failing.
We should foster a sense of wanting to protect people going through these things.
Martial arts as a helpful tool in treating mental health through exercise, comoradery (not necessarily a stand-alone treatment)
It’s incorrect and a liability to frame our programs as all someone needs to fix their depression or anxiety.
We need to be supportive of other aspects of treatment like medication and therapy
Eating disorders
Types and lifetime prevalence (Lifetime prevalence is the proportion of a population that at some point in their life (up to the time of assessment) have experienced the condition.)
- Binge eating disorder 2.8%
- Bulimia nervosa 1.0%
- Anorexia nervosa 0.6%
- Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (new diagnosis in the DSM V)
- All of these have a high comorbidity with anxiety disorder and other mental health conditions, and exercise is often a part of eating disorders, so we could have a higher incidence in our students
Can’t judge if someone has an eating disorder by someone’s size or fitness level
How to talk about fitness and nutrition
- Dieting is the number one cause of the onset of an eating disorder
- Claiming to be “on a diet” is a common excuse given to cover up the presence of an eating disorder
- For folks that have or are recovering from an eating disorder, talk about dieting, talking about food as “good or bad” can be a trigger for the disorder
- Don’t comment on weight loss unless you know that is someone’s goal. Praise people for the goals they have (come to the gym twice per week, build muscle, increase stamina) rather than assuming that weight loss is intentional or healthy
Trauma awareness
How trauma affects people
Believing and supporting survivors
Believing survivors is absolutely vital. Any thoughts you have like “That can’t possibly be true” or “It must not have been as bad as they say” should be kept to yourself and talked through with others later (being careful to keep the person’s confidence unless there’s a safety issue).
Victim blaming/ questioning
“Learn to stand up for yourself”: the barriers to this being effective in the workplace and other situations
Possibility of losing one’s job, home, caregiver, financial support, or other supports for many if they do stand up for themselves
Assaults and harassment are ALWAYS the fault of the perpetrator, so it’s important to be careful not to imply that someone “not standing up for themselves” is the cause of what happened to someone.
The Halo Effect
When our initial or ongoing impression of a person (He is so nice! She’s a great parent! They’re very polite!) colors our view of the person as a whole and what they are capable of. Be very careful if someone discloses sexual harassment, assault, etc. by someone that you know to not make statements about your impressions of their character- even if you initially have a hard time believing the accusation, keep your lack of belief to yourself when the disclosure happens and talk through your disbelief with OTHER people, not the person making the accusation, later- the other people should be fellow instructors if it’s someone that is involved in the gym in any way. Be careful to keep the person’s confidence if at all possible unless there’s a safety issue.
Consent and body self-ownership: Setting and Enforcing Boundaries must be modeled
Self-defense traditionally is taught to defend against strangers, but most attacks are by someone we know and often involve someone starting by seeing how far they can push our boundaries
Students should be taught to discuss with their training partner what they are and aren’t comfortable with; students should be given alternatives if they don’t feel comfortable being touched or interacted with in certain ways
Pressure and force as aspects of victimization
If we “force” students to do things or pressure them, we are potentially re-victimizing them, or making them more likely to give in to attempts to push their boundaries in the future
Setting the environment (strobe lights, loud noises, etc.)
Making the environment safe goes a long way toward making students feel comfortable staying and sticking with training
If you are going to use strobe lights, loud noises, etc. in training, inform students first so they have the opportunity to opt out
Allowing people to choose partners and to choose if you demo with them
Allowing the student to choose if you show them the technique on them or on someone else while they watch is important- they may have chosen a partner that they feel comfortable with
Provide options for students if they aren’t comfortable learning a technique or feel overwhelmed
For example, “If you need to take a break for any reason, feel free to sit and watch or step out into the lobby. You can join back in at any time.”
Trauma and other martial arts institutions
Some people come to us with baggage from other institutions where they were shamed, frightened, pressured, etc.
Instructional considerations
Learning differences in adults exist just as they do in children
How to address when someone is struggling
- Break technique into smaller steps
- Use landmarks instead of left and right
- “I do, we do, you do”
Addressing flashbacks and other effects of trauma if they surface
Signs of a flashback:
- Inability to communicate or respond
- Disconnection from the present
- Freeze or flight response
- Clenched, fluttering, or wide-open eyes
- Increased breathing and heart rate
- Uncontrollable crying, sharing, screaming, or calling for help (or silence)
- Curled into a fetal position or trying to hide
- Running or appearing to be trying to run
- Questioning why this is happening
- Apologizing repeatedly
- Signs may not be readily visible
Signs of a panic reaction or panic attack:
- They report feeling impending doom, danger, loss of control, or death
- Rapid, pounding heart rate
- Sweating
- Trembling or shaking
- Shortness of breath or throat tightness
- Physical symptoms like nausea, abdominal cramping, chest pain, headache
- Dizziness, lightheadedness or feeling faint
- Numbness or tingling sensation
- Feeling of unreality or detachment
- Signs may not be readily visible
How to address either if you notice a member having a flashback or panic reaction or attack:
- Speak calmly, quietly and confidently
- Either ask another volunteer or instructor who is present to take over the class or to step in with the person and stay with them until they are feeling better so that you can return to class
- Tell the person that they’re safe and that you or someone will be with them until they’re feeling better
- Ask them if they want to move to a seat or to the lobby
- Ask the person what would help them
- Ask before touching the person; if they are not responding then you can try gently touching them to guide them but remove your hand if they flinch or otherwise react negatively
- Help the person to breathe by breathing with them slowly, counting to ten with them, or guiding them through box breathing
- If they are not responding or having trouble deciding what would help, gently directing them to sit in the lobby may be appropriate
- DO NOT: Touch without asking; point out what is happening to other people unless necessary; tell them to calm down, tell them there’s no reason for their behavior, or that they’re embarrassing themselves or overreacting
What is inclusion?
Diversity is just one aspect of inclusion
Diversity means simply having people of different races, religions, sexual orientations, etc. at your organization
Learning centered, rather than expecting that we know what is needed
Being inclusive means acknowledging that we only know what we ourselves and other people quite similar to us need, and that people different than us are the experts in what they need
Incorporate the needs of communities into the design and implementation of programs
If we’re only designing our programs based on our limited understanding of what is needed and our experiences, we are missing out on what other communities need and limiting who can benefit from our programs
Diverse staff, volunteers, etc. at all levels are required to be inclusive
Not only participants, but instructors, coaches and leaders
Our status as “inclusive” is a work in progress and begins with this training and the use of inclusive language
“Inclusive language seeks to treat all people with respect, dignity, and impartiality. It’s constructed to bring everyone into the group.” That’s our goal, because if people don’t feel included in the group, if they don’t feel that their dignity is valued, or that we’re able to be impartial regardless of their race or gender identity or mental health status etc., they won’t want to be here and if they do stay, they may not benefit as much because they’ll be on guard
Accessibility: discuss specific accessibility considerations that your gym can and cannot accommodate.
Not treating “special needs” as the outlier
Statistics
Hate crimes, sexual assault, and other violence crimes are often under-reported.
Abuse, rape, and other forms of violence are often about power and control. Sexual assault is an expression of power and control with aggression, and is not generally related to the sexual orientation of the perpetrator.
Rape and sexual assault are defined differently.
US Justice Department’s Bureau of Justice Statistics estimates there have been an average of 250,000 hate crime victimizations each year since 2004.
In 8 out of 10 cases of rape, the person knew the perpetrator
1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before they turn 18
LGBTQ+ folks (brief LGBTQ 101)
1,445 reported hate crimes (2018) were due to sexual orientation or gender identity
61% of bisexual women experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner compared to 35% of heterosexual women
46% of bisexual women have been raped compared to around 20% of heterosexual women
Gay men are around twice as likely to be sexually assaulted as straight men
47% of transgender people are sexually assaulted in their lifetime
People of color
2,426 reported hate crimes were due to anti-black bias
880 reported hate crimes were due to bias against other minority races (Hispanic, Latino, American Indian and Alaska Native)
American Indians are twice as likely to experience a rape/sexual assault as all other races
Disabled people
Children with disabilities are almost 4 times as likely to experience violence than non-disabled children
Children with mental or intellectual impairments have 4.6 times the risk of sexual violence than non-disabled peers
Adults with mental health conditions are 4 times more likely to experience violence
Women
1 in 5 or 6 women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape
81% of women report that they have experienced sexual harassment
Religion, culture, and country of origin
1,156 reported hate crimes were due to religion (Jewish and Muslim people)
Homeless
In 2010, the criminal victimization rate within the homeless community was a massive 34%-89% ratio depending on the region. In stark comparison, housed people boast an average violent crime victimization rate of approximately 1.2%.
92% of a large, racially diverse sample of homeless mothers had experienced severe physical and/or sexual violence at some point in their lives (Browne & Bassuk, 1997). Thirteen percent of another sample of homeless women reported having been raped in the past 12 months, and half of these women were raped at least twice (Wenzel, et al., 2000).
These are the people we seek to serve, and this is why we work on our language
Intersecting identities
One example: In the 2015 Transgender Survey, American Indian, multi-racial, Middle Eastern and black respondents were most likely to have been sexually assaulted in their lifetime
Another example: 53% of black transgender respondents were sexually assaulted in their lifetime and 13% in the past year
61% of transgender people with disabilities have experienced being sexually assaulted in their lifetime
The nature of dehumanization and how it contributes to these statistics: sticks and stones may break my bones but words can make it more acceptable for you to use them to hurt me
How bias goes from hurtful to harmful
Power + prejudice = racism, sexism, etc.
If we talk about “degrading” women, we’re talking about using words that lead to women being dehumanized and lead to them being treated as less than men, which leads to some people feeling that it’s okay to cause them harm.
Main goal is to not make those views seem appropriate to people who might cause harm, and also to not make people think that they’re going to be harmed or we’re okay with harmful attitudes
We teach students not to react in certain ways to words- such as not doing a hammer fist to the back of the head because someone called your mom ugly. It does take strength to not let words cause you to react in certain ways when you are more powerful than someone. But when you are not quite as powerful, words can be an indicator that you are not safe in a space. Words that are connected to hate and violence and discrimination can cause fear, distrust, and guarding oneself in spaces where one should be able to be open, feel safe with people that shouldn’t be a threat to them, and trust that what they are doing there is not going to get them hurt.
The people who may be harmed or hurt by these terms already have to control themselves to avoid further harm constantly. If our measure of strength has to do with being affected by words, then they are already immeasurably strong. They will usually do this silently because they are afraid of backlash if they bring it up. Backlash can be anything from being kicked out of a place, being yelled at, being physically assaulted, or worse. We don’t want people to fear that if they hear words that are harmful, they will face backlash if they bring it up. We don’t want people to hear words that are harmful and be afraid that they mean that we allow even worse things to happen here. We want to have the reputation for standing up for people who are at risk of harm. If I hear someone saying derogatory things about trans people, I don’t think of them as someone who would help me. I don’t think of them as someone who would step in if I was being discriminated against or harmed. And I think that possibly, that person may be willing to hurt me themselves.
As we teach our students to be strong, to stand up for people who need help, we should be teaching them that strength isn’t just about protecting ourselves and others from physical danger. It’s also about passing out sleeping bags to people who could be harmed by the cold, sitting next to a woman on the bus who is being verbally harassed, and about not tolerating hate in any form because hate leads to more hate which leads to violence and discrimination.
Unconscious bias
Unconscious bias is simply part of human nature. We categorize things or people and assign values and traits to those things or people based on past experience. It’s how we are able to move through the world more quickly instead of having to have experience of each individual thing or person we come across before we can make decisions. However, unconscious bias can cause discrimination and cause us to make bad decisions about how to react to people or things when it is based on stereotypes that aren’t true. They’re not something to be mad at ourselves for having, but we do need to try to be aware of them when they come up and work to overcome them.
Unconscious bias is often not in sync with our conscious values. I’m guessing that none of us here think, “I’m racist towards ________”, and none of us think “I don’t like gay people”. But those biases exist begin at a very young age- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRZPw-9sJtQ
Affinity bias- a positive response to people who are similar to us (playing favorites)
Halo bias- admiring all of a person’s actions because of good things they did in the past
Perception bias- the tendency to form stereotypes about certain groups that makes it difficult to make an objective judgement about individual members of the group, in either direction- good or bad (hiring men for roles in leadership)
Confirmation bias- seeking out evidence that confirms our perceptions and ignoring contrary evidence
Implicit Association Test (implicit.harvard.edu)
Modeling respect for those different than we are through words and actions
Changing deeply embedded habits, considering the implications of words and phrases that have gone unchallenged too long, and to be empathetic to those whose experiences we may not share or understand
The question isn’t why are we suddenly “not allowed” to say these things, but why was it ever acceptable for us to?
Cultural differences
- We may not understand someone’s culture but everyone’s culture looks weird from the outside looking in. We can try to be understanding and take a moment before calling something weird, whether it’s religion, food preferences, even hygiene preferences.
Slurs (contrasted with cursing)
- Derogatory terms that target individuals or groups on the basis of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, gender expression, disability, etc.
What do slurs consist of including re: disabilities
Pronouns, not using “men and women” or “he or she”
Avoiding assumptions about sexual orientation, disability status, gender identity, gender roles
Tone policing
Coded language: terms that hide bias, such as “thugs”, “the hood”, “illegal alien”
How to address hurtful (versus harmful) talk: “Men always…” “White people shouldn’t…” Not wanting to work with certain instructors at first until trust is built… etc.
How to give and accept feedback to each other when we all inevitably say or do something that isn’t in line gym guidelines
Modeling what we want to see with members and each other: “here we talk about it this way”, repeating with the language you’d prefer they used, correcting pronouns appropriately, etc.
Getting called out: being called out by a member (or fellow instructor) for behavior that was harmful isn’t a bad thing. It’s up to us to control our emotions, listen, and take what is said into consideration, and apologize if appropriate. If we are feeling defensive, it’s important to ask if the conversation can be resumed later and take some time to think about it. Calling out is a way of trying to maintain a relationship- if a member calls you out, it means that they believe you’ll be willing to change, they trust that you won’t harm them for saying something, and that they like being here enough to not just leave or talk negatively about the gym behind our backs.
Calling each other or gym members in: If someone’s behavior is pretty blatantly wrong, or if you were the one affected by the action, it’s not a bad thing to calmly call them out in front of people. But sometimes calling people IN is a better way to go that avoids embarrassment if you know someone will be willing to learn and if you were not the person affected, or if you feel like you are able to do it.
1. Decide how to communicate to them: pulling them aside after class, texting them, or just talking to them quietly (especially if it’s something that should be addressed in the moment through an apology, waiting until later may not work)
2. Mention the action and why it was harmful
3. Be willing to discuss it with them later, or refer them to someone else if you’re not sure how to guide them further about the topic
4. If their response is positive, tell them thank you for listening
5. If their response isn’t positive or they don’t want to change their future behavior, talk to someone else about how to proceed
Brainstorm session:
How can we as a program better meet the needs of the people who need us most?
What next steps will you take as an individual?
Final questions and wrap up
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