New Lyrics: "The Dragon Has Been Drinking" (Patreon)

Lar's at it again, from an idea by Adam P. Knave. Which led to this.

Well, my dragon has been drinking

And Bilbo’s asleep

The dwarves went back to Rivendell

And the elf king took a flying leap

And the werebear needs a haircut

And Tom Bombadil looks like a Ren Faire clown

‘Cause the wizard's out of fireworks

And the Barrel Rider damn near drowned

‘Cause the dragon has been drinking,

The dragon has been drinking

And the trolls are getting Arkenstoned

And Sauron’s blind in one eye

And that's all he has, so fuck it

My associates inform me

That Gollum has my bucket

And Radagast has a petting zoo

Inside his freakin’ bathrobe

With marmosets and a cockatoo

‘Cause the dragon has been drinking

The dragon has been drinking

And the giant spiders have angry snacks

Back to their webs they're shleppin’

And the goblin king is a doofus but

He knows his elfin weapons

And the dragon has been drinking,

The dragon has been drinking

And you can't find the Black Gate

With a pre-owned palantir

And if you exit to find the rest stop

Mirkwood’s one road disappears

And the Laketown men are drooling

And their town’s demise is deferred

‘Cause the one guy who's a decent shot

Gets advice from a talking bird

And the dragon has been drinking,

The dragon has been drinking...

Not Bree.

Not Bree.

Not Bree.

Maybe...

the whole town of...

Bree.

Music: "The Piano Has Been Drinking" by Tom Waits