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  • Hard Choices 11 - The Mummy Trilogy + Outtakes.mp3

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My darlings, your support is an honor and privilege that I am keenly aware of each and every day. I hope this early access and this extra juicy episode is an absolute feast for the soul!

1999 called and it says "hey babe, remember me?" and yes, yes we do. We remember the exact moment when The Mummy first crashed into our lives and touched us in ways we couldn't yet fully articulate. Rick, Evey, Ardeth, all of them, swept us off our feet and we've stayed swept ever since.

This universe has some of the crème de la crème of fuckable characters but it also has some real bad eggs in there too. Annie Craton, Kit Mulkerin, Kam Servo, and MeganBob gathered up 21 characters from The Mummy trilogy and tried to figure out what the true median is and uncover some dark and cursed truths along the way. There are some things that shouldn't be read out loud, it turns out. Tune in to find out who's ready for a cartouche imprint on their ass, who loves shooty boys and yee-haws, and more thoughts about yetis than you'd expect. Hit download and enjoy something with enough passion to raise the dead...and maybe touch their butts.

Download, put in your earbuds, offer a prayer to Sobek, and enjoy this ride down the Nile to find what lies at the throbbing heart of horniness. 

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Comments

K.F.T.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOO I STILL NEED TO FINISH THE CUTLERY BUT IM SUPER JAZZED

Kris Newton

Psst, Bob: Page 90 of The Book of Erotic Fantasy. You CAN play a cleric with healing blowjobs. Now, granted, this is for 3rd edition D&D, which is a mess. But do you want to breathe life into somebody though their dick or not?

Joe Flood

Is there a female equivalent (from any media) to Benny? Described, I believe, as a "greasy little sex minion?" 😆

Hard Choices

You know, I don't think there is, or at the least, there are VERY few! Now, that's not because such people don't exist, it's more because I think Hollywood is a lot more willing to show a man who isn't sexually attractive than they are to show a woman who isn't baseline VERY ATTRACTIVE. It's kind of a Hollywood issue more than anything. I would be super into women who gave off that vibe, but I think it's hard to portray it because Hollywood only wants women who are super hot to be onscreen and then, on top of that, the power dynamics are going to start to feel weird if there's a greasy little sex minion woman working for a big powerful guy. It would really need to be a greasy little sex minion on her own just doing her own thing or working for a powerful woman. This is (one reason) why misogyny sucks. Global gender equity would give us whole new WORLDS of character archetypes to get hot and bothered about!

RachelK

...Bob, have we stumbled on Phedre no Delaunay's spell list?

Ian Parlaman

The closest I can think of is the younger cousin in Knives Out. She is afraid of losing her family wealth and so tries to convince Ana de Armas to give away her fortune. It's a cowardly move where she's throwing away her friendship for wealth, but it pales in comparison to the brazenness in which Benny will do that.

RachelK

Charge whatever you want for the Doug Jones Hands Supercut Tier. I will pay it.

Hard Choices

I lack the video editing skills, but you're making me consider this possibility of getting to watch Doug Jones's hands nonstop for five minutes...

Hard Choices

I AM SO HAPPY YOU ENJOYED IT!!! It was an extremely intense rollercoaster and I could not have loved it more!