Loving You - Chapter 33 (Patreon)

5 months later.

I sat in the living room of my brothers home staring out the window. It was days like these when I had nothing to keep me occupied that my mind drifted back to what was. I sigh deeply. Damien. The first few months without him were literal hell. I'd find myself crying suddenly, and eventually I went into a depressed state. My brother made me move back in with him and go to therapy to keep me sane. Eventually I was able to enroll in online classes but he would make me work from home so he could keep an eye on me. The furthest he would let me travel was to the library to do some work.

I felt really bad about everything I was putting him through. I know he didn't understand why I was so sad and upset about Damien leaving me, but when he stepped out of my life he took a chunk of my happiness with him. Which was really crazy i know, but I couldn't help myself. I fell in love with him. Even though he did all the things he did to me, I still managed to fall for him.

When I left the hospital I wanted to go back and live the way I had before Damien had bulldozed his way into my life. But after a week of trying I had gone insane and my brother eventually came down to get me because I had all but lost my sanity.

I had found out that Peter was alive and well, he was released from the hospital a week after my disappearance and the media was saying he was jumped in an alley. I'm guessing Damien had something to do with that. Also my best friend Paiglynn had tried to reach out to me, but I couldn't speak to her. The week I was home wasn't a great readjustment period. I couldn't hold a conversation with anyone. Turns out Damien had me in his custody for a whole 11 months.

My once dreams shifted to vicious nightmares that I couldn't wake up from, I went a whole month with these terrible dreams about my time in Christians warehouse. I would wake up screaming in the middle of the night or just not go to sleep. My brother eventually made me move back in with him so he could keep an eye on my health and well-being, forcing me to go to therapy. I eventually got to the point where I was semi back to normal, but some days I would just lose myself again.

So here I was, sitting alone in the middle of the living room staring out the window at nothing. Missing him. Again. I sigh and stand to leave the window and walk to my room. I was home alone today because my brother had to work. He had taken a personal leave from work to take care of me but I felt bad that he was once again putting his life on hold because I was weak so I made him return. I walk to my bed where the blue bear Damien left me lay. The tears began to well up in my eyes as I stared at it. I wondered what he was doing right now. The whole time that I was with him I told him if he really loved me, he would let me have my freedom. But I really regretted telling him that right now. I grab the bear from the top of my spread and cuddle him close to me.

~

Jax POV

I sat in the corner of the room once again watching Damien mercilessly drain the life of another man. If he was cruel before he was even worse now. Since the day he walked away from Nevaeh he was in a constant foul mod. Constantly killing people, snapping at everyone, everyone was scared to speak two words to him. Even I was hesitant to speak to him. He was like a crazed man, and the only thing that could sate him would be blood and death. His father would be happy to see him this way. His mother would be very disappointed.

I look up as the room suddenly became quiet. The struggles of the man he was draining of life finally stopping. Damien was standing over his body, a look of satisfaction gleaming in his eyes. I squeezed my fists together to keep me from fiddling. I could handle death. Hell, I was the one who had brought it upon people sometimes. But this rate he was going , Damien was doing it for sport. The amount of bodies he had added to his kill list in the past few months was enormous. Damien walks out of the room without speaking a word to me, slamming the door behind him. It was always like this. He never said anything, never joked around, never even cracked a smile like he used to. He was just all work and seriousness. I walk from the room to Damiens office. Since the attack we had relocated, living in the mountains instead of off the coast. Damien had been extra careful when doing this. He had even gotten rid of all his men except a select few.

I walk into the office to see him on his computer. And on the screen is none other than Nevaeh. She's asleep in her bedroom. When Damien left her he bugged her brothers whole house so that he could keep an eye on her without her brothers knowledge or consent. She looks as broken as Damien. Damien always does this. He even left a tracker in her body when he left her and every time he sees she's moved from her brothers home he watches her movements. Personally I don't understand why he didn't just go back to her. They obviously didn't want to be apart. A loud noise bangs throughout the room and I jump. Now on high alert. I look to see Damien's fist on the desk.

"Jax. Ready the car. We're going to get something of mine."