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Hell on Earth - Episode 2: DEATH (Patreon)

Published:
2023-01-18 09:00:03
Edited:
2025-08-19 18:34:06
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

Downloads

Content

The Black Death, the rise of the Habsburgs, and the dream of the Universal Monarch.

Interactive atlas, bibliography and credits for the series can be found at: hellonearth.chapotraphouse.com

Files

Comments

✮BRAIN SLURRY✮

It's like the first few episodes of The Wire, or the first half of a Civ game..

Jon Beaulieu

I finally feel like my history degree has some value!

Jacob

This shit rules.

Do Golems Dream of Ceramic Sheep

l'm still trying to make calling Germany and France "East and West Carolingia" a thing. It will never be a thing but l can dream a tiny little dream can't l?

Do Golems Dream of Ceramic Sheep

Glad l read The Verge before listening to this (by about a year, but still). Definitely some thematic overlap and it's helping the comprehension

Hunter

This really has been fantastic so far and we haven’t even gotten to the fun shit yet, there are so many great characters in the 30 Years War. I feel like Chris and Matt generally are a really good combo, I hope they do more stuff in the future where Chris acts more as a legit equal co-host than a producer.

Stolzie

Too much textbooking otherwise well done gents

The Fine Art Revolution

you guys should release a study guide or outline of some sort, just to pin down all these connections across europe

Matthew Dunn

Yo the music is sick, need to put out a soundtrack for this. The title track after Chris’s intro gets me hyped.

grimbo

OSHA's fault

Michael Landreth

Some suggestions for both of you: if you like “Hell on Earth” and “Hinge Points,” I highly recommend Christman/Wade’s Hell of President’s series as well (not on Patreon but the entire series is available free on YouTube) and any of Christman’s “Inebriated Past” episodes (which are all available on the Patreon). These are all in a similar vein of the Hell on Earth and Hinge Points episodes, so if you haven’t already discovered them I wanted to point you in the direction.

MJ Harris

love this series, but y'all need to learn how to pronounce "Magdeburg"

Brendan Kneeland

“Plus Ultra” wasn’t expecting the Habsburg-My Hero Academia synapses to connect but here we are

Norman X. Picklestein

yo the Thirty Years War is cool enough without pretending that it has anything to do with the Black Death, much less Capitalism! (I repeat the plea of another commenter to read Robert Brenner)

snafujesus

Great series so far. This episode is a little dense tho and may be hard to follow for anyone unfamiliar with the players. the air horns and asides didn’t make it any easier, and I kept wishing I had a copy of the text to refer to.

EaZy E

Driving around delivering pizza, listening for the third time because I smoke too much weed to remember all these names on the first go. Lol

fredbaroque

Riveting! I wish you'd write a book, for my girlfriend who hates podcasts. She's from Saxony-Anhalt, right in the thick of it. Together we visited many of the places whose names you butchered. It's fascinating to hear that history come to life through a Marxist lens! Also, check your DMs!

crabbe

The worst part is them not understanding what double entry book keeping is

Adam Brennan

Subscribed for this series 🙌🙏✊

Evan Hayward

Can anyone chirping on here with a correction or a gripe just do us all a favor and shut the fuck up, we’re trying to enjoy something fun here

J

Let me see that arquebussy

Simon

the Thirty Years War is a top tier war and so it is extremely easy to make it interesting without reference to long term economic trends and structures, but to say a thirty year war that engulfed an entire continent has nothing to do with those things is ridiculous

David Andrews

These are extremly well-done, both entertaining and educational. I look foward to the next episode.

etienne

hellonearth.chapotraphouse.com

etienne

took me forever to figure out why the Habsurg motto AEIOU was so funny to me and I finally remembered: it's the fucking voice generator memes from Moonbase Alpha JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN AEIOU AEOIU JOHN MADDEN UUUUUUUUUUU

J.W.

Charles = Little Carmine

Omegasmash

I had a stroke learning that plus ultra is something that is rooted in history

th

YoungMasterMoe

I live relatively close to Augsburg and visited the "Fuggerei" on my last trip there. It was founded by Jakob Fugger in 1521 and its one of the oldest social housing projects in the world that still runs to this day, administered by Fugger's descendents. Its just so crazy to actually see the remenants of everything the series talks about in real life.

Hayley

i like podcast i like matt i like chris i like history i like podcast

colin muller

verhoven 4th crusade movie produced by chapo plzkthx

Louis Savarino

does anyone have a link to the theme music track?

Jake Crev

woah. joined the Patreon for this series. THIS SHIT IS TOO GOOD

Shar

I'm loving the Atlas. Nothing like the plague, wars and crazy religions to make my day tolerable.

EricVulgaris (edited)

Comment edits

2026-09-09 10:00 Waiting for the 16th century cover band Augsburg Confessional
2023-02-11 13:01

AKorgar

Did you get to meet Old Mother Fugger?

Llt

Enjoy the StarCraft mission briefing sound effect at the beginning

Gubriel

Recon-questa

Karl Hungus

Subbed specifically for this series, so good

John

Same. This and poppy.

Ballz Aldrin

Do you have to listen to these on patreon or can you find them in your subscribers feed on podcast player

Tom Morris

Same! Miss MAtt - hope he catches Sisu, if only for the squibs!

grymm

I can now determine what the great Matt is saying at double speed. It's my new jutsu.

Garth Hansen

Anyone else just relistening to this and hell of presidents over and over? Peak Matt

Willm

I assume double entry bookkeeping depends on a place value system, you can't really do much with columns of roman numerals (this is the worst comment I've ever made anywhere)

Nicholas Campanello

I just have to say this episode just helped me get a 100% on my final essay for this history summer course I'm taking. I literally used the opening quote from Chris in a piece of it and a lot of this episode as a reference. My professor even noted that she appreciated using this as a source. So thank you guys!

Josiah

Same for me!

Mac daddy

Yep, Matt and Chris kill it talking about history together. Best way to indulge my parasocial longing to hear Matt

th

what if they wanted to be right instead

Blorst of times

Listening to this again some two years later. So good.

John cawley

I may be a little dense but can someone explain why France having a set of natural borders led to a more centralized power structure and Germany having no real natural borders led to it being a mess?

king_von_diesel

Its the intuition of dynasty and political economy: dynasty's are defined by relative internal stability and a monopoly on violence. Having natural geographic borders makes it mechanically easier to assert a common cultural identity, language, and set of laws. The lack of such boundaries, coupled w/the declining fertility of vast chunks of central European land, essentially opens you up to civil strife as battles/contests over strategically important resources.

BoganTheLastard

I have one major problem with this conception of the HRE as inherently ungovernable as a centralized entity: it had been in the past. The Ottonians, to some extent, and then much later the Hohenstaufen, had governed the empire centrally. The Staufers actually developed a relatively sophisticated bureaucracy called the Reichskammer which was able to collect taxes and run state affairs effectively. Two major things occurred which severed the Empire's ability to function as a cohesive unit: first, the accession of Frederick II, (called Stupor Mundi because of his impressive personal qualities and eccentric, almost modern outlook) to the thrones of the Empire and the Kingdom of Sicily. His kingdom of sicily was governed very tightly, with a centralized bureaucracy of the kind that had been seen before in the HRE (and the ERE before it). The drawback of this though was that this gave Frederick a very Mediterranean outlook, and a focus on italian and broader European affairs which caused him to neglect Germany; this resulted in the broadening of powers to the local lords there. The next major fracture, which was much more severe, was the succession crisis following the death of the last Staufer emperor. Over the two centuries of their dominance over imperial politics, the Staufer came to be seen as the natural imperial family. Absent them, there was an anarchic struggle for imperial power that would drag on for decades. This would irreparably damage the Hohenstaufen bureaucracy, and lead to the decentralization of power

Reina Gervais

Charlemagnes empire could have stayed for longer if someone invented the railroad. Why didn't they do that were they stupid?

Sexual Harry Potter

There actually were a lot of Muslim Christian alliances before the France-Ottoman alliance, just much earlier pre-reconquista. Since the caliphate of Cordoba was the only actual centralized power that had their shit together for a period the Christian kings of Iberia would often turn to them to help settle their disputes. And similar to how quickly the religious pretext of the reformation wars was adopted and discarded when convenient to give legitimacy to socio-economic conflicts, the petty kings of Iberia spent centuries flip-flopping on the matter of whether the caliphate was their spiritual enemy in an eternal clash of civilizations or just their cool immigrant brother in-law that you’d ask to go beat the shit out of your cousin that’s bullying you

Sexual Harry Potter

I feel so blessed that my AP euro teacher WAS like this and sparked a lifelong fascination with history. Although confusingly he is a nevertrumper conservative despite his materialist analysis of history

Reece Coren

my ap euro teacher had a winston churchill mural on his wall. I took the class in bucks county pennsylvania in 2019.

Jacob Curley

Here I listen; I can do no other. Pod help me.

Dale Sedgwick

Christman you son of a bitch, you've done it again!

Zane

If you can memorize the names of every gay ass lord of the duchy of east smefferwyckerania you should be able to pronounce “reconquista” you sound like Jill Biden saying si se pwadre

Max

Black Deaths Matter

Animals in Motion

Sweden also had s peasant rebellion led by Engelbrekt 1433 or thereabouts.

Britz Man

This is basically a cushvlog with decent audio.

AbeLinkin

I couldn’t come up with a better idea for a show in my wildest dreams

Michael Stevens

i like the production value, great job Chris And i love the analysis and funny tidbits, awesome job Matt and Chris!

William

Some comments - a little bit about episode 1 as well. -it seems like this is in-between a scripted and conversation and it doesn't really benefit from either. I understand trying to stay on topic but the stilted nature takes away from the experience. -sound design is excellent, only complaints are moreso from ep 1 so far; there are some sfx drops like the battle noises that don't really seem to add much (so why do them?). Air horns are great though lol. Also just a complaint about some of the music, which is beautiful on its own, being remixed or having that feel, but that's more personal opinion. Main into music does "slap" as the kids say. -not sure how to phrase this, but you guys seem to hint too much at your conclusions; I understand that you're telling us what you think, but if you leave a little more room for the listeners to make conclusions on their own, those conclusions are more well remembered and received. Think about when a movie does "show, not tell" vs the opposite, I guess -it think you guys over use "capitalism" to the point that it's turning into a Scooby Doo villain. Omg it was capitalism the whole time? Feudalism and Capitalism, as systems, have things in common so they're best described by their differences, right? Peasants still had their surplus labor appropriated from them, largely for the same things; the mobility of capital here seems to be the key difference at this point, right? Now, anyone can live like a lord if they manage their money well enough. Idk, it just seems overused and not exactly clear what you mean when you say it

SF

no-one asked

Maxwell

I feel the opposite of this guy. Great pod, boys.

Osvaldo Lucca

Although no one asked, William is entitled to his 💩 opinion

Bruce Eggers

Methinks thou dost bullshitteth. Great podcast!

William

Lol this makes me want to comment more. Idgaf about what dipshit Chapo fans think - Matt has said he likes feedback. Also, where exactly did I say I didn't like the podcast? Seems like you all are so insecure that the slightest inclination that someone isn't 100% in love with the thing you like, means they hate it. Fucking grow up Anyways, comments after finishing; I think the way both episodes 1 and 2 turn more conversational towards the end is exactly what people liked about the presidents series. It does make the earlier part of the episode seem more like an information or exposition dump though, which does take away from the overall quality of the product

Gubriel

That's all we've ever wanted

Gubriel

I invited a friend to the Live Show so I need everyone there to be cool and normal

T

This is such a great podcast. You would never know Matt was playing CS:GO the whole time.

HuffingGasInTheShed

Tied to listen at work, way too dense. I can’t wait to dig in on a day off

J Lit

🔥

MinkL0af

WARNING- do not listen on Patreon in the desktop format! You have to listen on the app so that when Matt starts talking you can turn on the 1/2 speed playback function. I'm trolling but I am also actually doing this right now and am completely serious. Here's to converting to Catholicism so I can pray that Matt slows the fuck down in the following episodes.

SF

no-one asked

B2B Commuter

Happy Birthday Chris!!! 🎉 🎂

Brent

I needed this! Excitd for ep. 3

Pierce

Couldn’t come fast enough. Love you boys.

MinkL0af

At this pace and density of information it feels pretty impossible to just throw this on in the background while multitasking. I'm actually throwing it on half speed when Matt starts reading.

etienne

DIE FUGGERS HAVE LOGGED ON

Luke Mahler

i’m almost glad i have covid so i can just spend 90 min in my bed banging this

Alex

Let’s goooooooooo

Jim McKenna

Okay, but I’m getting a fireworks factory vibe. And it sounds like next week is back stories of participant countries. Okay. My subscription is paid up so why not.

SpicyPeanutSauce (edited)

Comment edits

2026-09-09 10:00 Really great stuff but Matt needs to slow down a bit
2023-01-18 18:07

Blinky

And a script.

Blinky

Hell, I studied this stuff extensively while working on my degree (not from a dialectical materialist perspective though), and I'm having to relisten to things, even when I know a decent amount. This is a very busy part of European history, though.

Keith Jackewicz

Chapo fans are unfortunately weird and cliquish. These are perfectly cogent critiques. Compared to what a real heterodox like Colin Drumm might say about this, it’s a pretty mild critique, too.

Hello!

This rules

Major bit me

There is a dialectical materialist relationship between ass pain and 16th century political success

Gavin Farrell

Love the commentary re: cannons and arquebusiers being shocking for those on the receiving end. Similar reactions in writing to the horror of WW1 is interesting. Fucking war. Every soldier needs to turn their guns on their officers and the oligarchs.

Poppy Chulo

World War 1 is a notable example because for the first time men were introduced to poison gas, heavy belt fed machine guns, crude tanks, and aerial bombardment.

Poppy Chulo

"These gormless fools couldn't know, didn't want to know, that their way of life was about to end!" Love you Matt

Ian McShane

Wait is all might from my hero academia a Charles Hapsburg reference? One man with ultimate power? Or am I stoned

kLindberg

This ep is gonna make me relapse in my paradox game addiction

Reece Coren

this is what ap euro should be

Kenneth Smith

I love everything about this series but somehow the music is my favorite part

etienne

when you show up to the accounting battle and the Italians bring along their new double column books. just get slaughtered

etienne

europeans shooting at colonial properties with advanced metallurgical and chemical weapons: haha this rules! yes!! europeans getting shot at with same: what the fuck no!

etienne

FUGGER UNLIMITED

Steve

Love that Matt casually dropped an Erfurt Latrine reference without even capitalizing on how funny that story is by explaining it. Baller move

Steve

Top 10 funniest stories in all of world history

Michelle

But no singing (thus far).

K102.1FM Mornings w/ Jonny Corndogs

It taught me that how to laugh in hard times. If more incidents like this happened now, I would probably consider believing in god again. Like, the G12 or whatever number it is now, if those MFs had the floor go out from under them and all the technocrats and pretentious world leaders just gave up the ghost at the bottom of an inescapable lagoon of liquid human waste, acting like quicksand, I might be ready to consider divine intervention. Sadly, we don't live in that world.

A Witherspoon

Can't believe they got me to pay for this - been a black wolf since 2019.

William Beamish

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!

G

gave me the warm fuzzies when chris introduced charles v with the same cadence he’d introduce presidents in during HoP

Zarathushtra

Who wrote the music? I love it so much, I’d there more?

justdave

Ya, having black AND red pens really helped me get ahead in the 'murder my enemies for blood money business' ™️

etienne

there was a Matty Glesias tweet recently about some trains or whatever where he joined a map of France and said "look! this is shaped like a pentagon!" he has the most beautiful brain of all

Anders Scholl

this episode really wants a companion w/ 4 more ppl where you play 'here i stand'

Michael Landreth

The Carolingian Renaissance was neither Carolingian, nor Renai, nor a sance.

Michael Landreth

Decent audio=no definable relationship to Cushvlog

Jjjjjjjjjj

Hopefully this series will address once and for all what the fuck a Jesuit even is and why I should be afraid of them

Bryan Jennings

Genuinely delighted they gave us the "free real estate" drop we all didn't know we wanted

J P 3

Feudal peasants weren't part of a wage labor system. They produced for subsistence and then gave (or were compelled to give) a portion of their surplus to the feudal lord. Under capitalism, people were forced off the land, usually into cities. These peasants had nothing but the clothes on their back. There is a qualitative difference between someone who produces largely for their own consumption, who has shelter, and a connection to community (typically with social bonds that go back generations), and people who are often separated from family, separated from place of birth, and forced into a system where they have to work for someone who owns the tools, has the power to hire and fire, etc. As a peasant, you could glean food off common land, or use food produced as part of a tenancy to feed yourself and your family. In a wage labor system, if you don't earn a wage, you don't eat and you don't have shelter.

Breakaway

Harvard Excellence

etienne

good call. the whole concept of orders within the catholic church to me is like ... blank. can't wrap my head around it.

J P 3

Additional item on point #4 - Karl Polanyi "The Great Transformation" is great resources (e.g. he distinguishes between societies with markets and market societies). Yanis Varoufakis in his book "Talking to My Daughter About the Economy" covers some of the same ground, but in a simplified parable. e.g. for Marx the wage-labor system is a critical feature of a capitalist system. In an agrarian, feudal system, most people aren't wage laborers, they're tenant farmers. There's exploitation of labor in both systems and expropriation of surpluses in both feudal and capitalist systems, but the introduction of a wage-labor system into the equation is a significant difference with implications for the system of production and social relations. It produces a new system.

Thibault Rieur

Wedgwood has a good explanation in the 30 years war book. Basically there are doctrinal groups within the church, usually created in response to a contradiction or stress put on the system - they're a bit like sanctioned political parties. The monastic orders for the most part think that the church is too worldly and take up vows to live in piety. They don't tend to rise through the ranks. Jesuits are a militant group founded by a nobleman to crush dissent and heresy, very close to secular power, very wealthy and influential. No doubt we'll have more info by next week :)

Post Void

Wouldn't that have been mentioned when the Italian Wars were brought up in this episode? Correct me if I'm wrong but I believe Venetian Maritime Law (they did mention the ledgers) helped formulate concepts of citizen"ship" through corporatizing and commodifying the individual, usually at birth. The Jesuits are often considered to be the custodians of this practice during its introduction, as they are banking and authority order of the Vatican. This established a precedence, once only used in international waters, now to be used in all liquidity of business. 400 years later, we have Mitt Romney echoing this sentiment "Corporations are people my friend" and People are corporations too by said logic.

Chubbs
>>99925572

cackling at being bino'd like this at the first Patreon comment I read

Tim O'

Love callbacks to the other parts of the MCU (Matt Christman Universe)

Heavenly Father69

sorry super off topic: there was a story on NPR last night 1/18/23 about a non profit organization that "educates girls and women on they are suited to work for the NSA." It asserted that feminists should work for the NSA. Can anybody find a link to this incredibly psyop story?

J

I love the idea that the nobility 'protected' the serfs

Jonathan Szerszen

Excellent job guys! Really enjoying the series and learning a lot

Metra Eccentric

This one was a bit harder to follow, and I think others talked about how fast Matt was talking in the first half. I'm not going to listen to stuff at half speed, but if the whole thing ends up being 5 minutes longer because you're talking slower no one's going to mind. Also, there were just more disparate topics in this one, more complex, etc. I do get that this is the slow build/vegetables to the rollercoaster/dessert of what's to come.

K H

Call an herbalist call an herbalist....but not for me